Disclaimer: I do NOT own Naruto or any of the characters in this anime, it belongs to Kishimoto Masashi. Though if he were to give me it… no? Okay, fine then. I don't own it.
Warning: yaoi and AU and language.
Italics mean Sasuke's thoughts.
I thank everyone for the reviews and for reading.
Pairing: Sasunaru, Nejinaru, Gaanaru slight Zabuza x Haku
Unluckily for Sasuke, Naruto chose this moment to burst through the door calling his name. Sasuke's mind went blank. Naruto just stood there and examined Sasuke for two minutes. "Sasuke…"
"Naruto, I can explain…" Sasuke started his explanation or at least tried too. His mouth went dry and his throat was stuck, sweat was dripping from his forehead. No, I can't fucking explain this. What am I supposed to say? 'Oh hey, Naruto… What? Oh this, yeah, footy pajamas are my sick fetish…Not only that but I've been wearing footy pajamas at least once a week since I was a baby! Yeah and if I miss a week I'd throw an immature tantrum.' I'm so screwed. Please don't hate me…
"You wear footy pajamas!" Naruto exclaimed and pointed at Sasuke's pajamas.
"Yes, yes, I do…" Sasuke was feeling nauseous. This is not how it's supposed to happen. We're supposed to end up together and be in love for all eternity. It hasn't even started yet!
"I think it's cute," Naruto smiled at Sasuke one of the most innocent smiles Sasuke has ever seen. His heartbeat increased three times the normal speed he could feel a blush creep on his face. He called me cute.
"Really? Y-you don't think I'm a creepy farmer with no guts and wears a baby's outfit?" Sasuke babbled he knew that what he just said didn't make any sense whatsoever. He didn't understand himself so he didn't blame Naruto for not understanding.
"No… I don't think you're a farmer with no guts and wears baby clothing."
"Oh right, you wanted something Naruto?" Sasuke asked remember the blonde had come into his room calling his name.
"Well… I-I had a nightmare where there was lots and lots of grapes raining down on us and then bubbles came from the ground and then you were killed by green bubbles and I was scared…that I'd never see you again." Naruto trailed off, avoiding eye contact with Sasuke. Sasuke could hear his own heartbeat increase again.
"Well, I'm okay, do you need anything else?" Sasuke asked. Sasuke's hand was shaking when he took Naruto's chin and gently lifted his head so Naruto would be facing him.
"Ano sa, ano sa Sasuke, can I sleep with you?" Naruto was violently blushing. Why yes my dear Naruto anything to see you naked. However, Sasuke knew what Naruto had meant.
"Yeah, sure," Sasuke motioned Naruto to the bed. The only light source in the room was from the moon's glow. It made Naruto look ethereal and breathtaking Sasuke wanted to just hug Naruto right then and there. Okay, Sasuke one and a half years of your cowardly ways, time to act!
Sasuke leaned forward and tried to hug Naruto from behind, however, Naruto had been walking towards the bed. Sasuke had realized this and tried to regain balance but it was too late, he fell flat on his face.
"Are you alright, Sasuke?" Naruto asked helping him get up. After hearing Naruto say this made Sasuke's confidence shrink.
"Yeah, I'm fine, let's just go sleep." My life sucks!
"Okay."
RIIIINGGGGG The annoying sound of an alarm clock woke Sasuke up immediately. It's too bad that Itachi had picked this day to get him a new alarm clock Sasuke was having a dream of him and Naruto in the same bed. He picked up the alarm clock and threw it at his closet door, shattering it into pieces instantly. Fuck, fuck it all!
Sasuke felt warmth next to him and saw Naruto cuddling next to him. Sasuke's heart beat went so fast that it felt like it would just jump out of his chest, fall on the floor and continue beating. How did he sleep through the alarm clock?
Sasuke shook Naruto to wake him up but Naruto muttered "Five more minutes Iruka." Sasuke looked at Naruto's face, his lips were parted and he looked so peaceful yet delicious. Sasuke leaned in and hesitated a bit, I can't take advantage of him like this…
Sai burst into Sasuke's room scaring the shit out of him. Sasuke's cousin stared at him and stood there with his jaw hung open. "S-Sasuke… Please tell me you didn't rape him."
"I didn't rape him," Sasuke stated but he knew he was close to doing that.
"Okay, now tell me the truth," Sai pried looking at Sasuke seriously.
"I. Did. Not. Rape. Naruto."
"Okay, goody, tell him to wake up, it's a school day," Sai smiled at Sasuke as if the 'rape talk' had never taken place. Did he just say goody?
"Okay…" Sasuke looked at Naruto and regretted not kissing him. He silently cursed Sai for coming in at that moment even if he wasn't planning on harassing Naruto. I blame Sai!
Sasuke swallowed before shaking Naruto's arm gently again. "Maybe you should kiss him… You know like in Sleeping Beauty and Snow White. The prince kisses the princess and they wake up," Sai suggested.
"No, he looks so… so defenseless now. It would be like rape if I had kissed him," Naruto looked so angelic that Sasuke didn't want to wake him up. It was almost unreal.
"Sasuke, you sound like a girl," Sai stated. "Just wake him up; I don't want to be late on my first day."
"I do not sound like a girl," protested Sasuke.
"Whatever, just wake him up," Sai sounded irritated enough to actually kill a cow.
"Fine, whatever," Sasuke shook Naruto again. Naruto's eyes fluttered open and blue eyes scanned the room for recognition.
"Where am I?" Naruto muttered more to himself than anyone.
"You're in my room," Sasuke declared. Finally, under control again.
After hearing this Naruto regained memories of the previous night. "Oh…"
"Yeah, let's go it is 8:00 a.m." Sai whined.
"Eight… Oh my gosh, I'm not even changed yet!" Naruto panicked and started looking for his clothes. He was frantic and looking everywhere while Sai and Sasuke watched in amusement.
"It's in the guest room," Sasuke explained.
"Oh, right!" Naruto shouted from the realization. He hurried to the other room and came back five minutes later changed into his school uniform (1). "Where's the washroom?"
"Right over there," Sasuke pointed to his personal bathroom. He heard Naruto brushing his hair and brushing his mouth before realizing that he had to get ready too. He wore his uniform without the tie again and unbuttoned the top three buttons on his blouse. This resulting in a teasing glimpse of his bare chest.
Once Naruto got out of the bathroom Sasuke brushed his teeth and brushed his hair. Okay, Sasuke! Ask him to the Autumn Festival!
Sasuke walked out of his washroom and saw Sai pulling on Naruto's arm. "What are you doing?" snapped Sasuke.
Sai ignored Sasuke and continued pulling on Naruto's arm. "Come on Naruto, we can give you a ride," Sai insisted.
"No, it's fine really!" Naruto argued.
"Naruto, if you run to school you would still be late and Gai-sensei would make you do seventy-three laps around the school… in thirty minutes." Sasuke knew he just got Naruto's weakness. Even if Naruto was a fast runner he was unable to run seventy-three laps around the school in thirty minutes. The only ones who were able to were Gai Maito, their teacher, Rock Lee and if Sasuke was in a good mood, well Sasuke.
Naruto swallowed at the thought. "Fine."
"You're good, Sasuke," Sai complimented, trying to fix his tie.
"Whatever, let's go," Sasuke ordered. He led Naruto out the door with Sai trailing closely behind.
"Hayate (2), get the limousine ready. Now." Sasuke spoke calmly into the intercom. He was glad he was finally regaining control over his emotions. The Uchiha was to never have outbursts… with the exception of Sai. Sai's parents didn't care for this kind of manners and he was always charming the adults.
"Hai, Sasuke-bocchama, it is ready now," Hayate's voice was fuzzy over the intercom.
"Good."
-Konoha High-
"Yahoo! I still have ten minutes to sign up," Sai cheered.
"I better get to class," Naruto said running off to physical education.
"Yeah, good luck Sai, I've got to go or else Gai-sensei will make me turn into his clone," Sasuke waved as he ran off to the gymnasium after Naruto.
Sasuke's physical education class consisted of girls and boys from grade twelve and eleven (3). Unfortunately Neji was in his class and always flirting with Naruto. Lee was in his class too, Lee was often loud, emotional and disruptive. I hope Gaara isn't in this class; it would be so much easier. As if Sasuke had jinxed it, Gaara came into the changing room, fuck!
Gai-sensei burst through the boy's changing room's door with a dramatic entrance a corny pose. "Okay, everyone, out of the changing room, it's time for laps." Half the boys groaned in objection but Gai just sent them a wide smile and two thumbs up.
Sasuke and Rock Lee were head to head (4); Sasuke was in a really good mood since Naruto had stayed the night. Lee was huffing like a steam boat as he sped up. His sweat splattered on Sasuke's face. Trailing after them was Neji and Gaara and then Morino Idate and Naruto.
"I'm winning you, Sasuke-kun," Lee stated. "Are you feeling okay today?"
"Yes," Sasuke's answered curtly.
"Okay, stop running, sports! I, your coach Maito Gai, will make you all play football," Gai shouted enthusiastically. None of the guys really minded playing except Naruto. He sucked in football. He had a big problem with the whole tackle thing. "Okay sports, two captains. TWO CAPTAINS NOW!" Gai shouted and pumped his fists in the air.
"Who're the captains?" Sakura asked.
"Kiba is captain of team sport and Sasuke is captaining team champ, now go, pick your teammates," Gai ordered. Lee looked slightly disappointed he couldn't be captain. "Pick someone Kiba, we don't have all day!"
Sasuke smirked, he was sure Kiba wouldn't pick Naruto seeing as how badly he sucked. Kiba was just about to pick Neji when he caught a glimpse of his best friend's crestfallen face. "Naruto Uzumaki." He really didn't care about winning, Naruto had been his best friend since kindergarten he'd rather lose than make his friends sad.
Naruto looked up hearing his name and saw Kiba waving at him and mouthing 'Come on.' His face instantly lit up and he practically skipped over to Kiba. Sasuke thought it was cute yet annoying that the stupid dog boy hadn't picked someone else.
"Rock Lee," Sasuke pointed straight at Lee and motioned him over. He knew he should probably have picked Neji so he would win but Lee was pretty good too. Besides, if Neji and Naruto were on different teams it would give Neji a reason to molest… or tackled his potential boyfriend.
"Neji," Kiba said.
"Shikamaru." And so they picked their teams. On Sasuke's team were Sakura, after incessant nagging and Ino, Shikamaru, Rock Lee, Tenten, Hinata and some other people he randomly chose. On Kiba's team were Naruto, Neji, Gaara, Shino, Chouji, Kabuto and some people Sasuke didn't know the names of.
"Okay, start!" shouted Gai Maito.
"Wait!" a voice shouted. "My name is Sai Uchiha; I'm supposed to join this P.E class."
Sasuke turned around so fast it almost gave him whiplash. What?
"Are you by any chance related to this champ here?" Gai asked while pointing at Sasuke. Sai just nodded. "Why, what a good sport, you should be on Sasuke-champ's team!"
"Okay… what are we playing?" Sai asked. Even Sai found his P.E teacher a little strange, aside from the fact he was wearing green tights. Very tight tights.
"Football! We're playing football!" Gai shouted with ambition.
"Yes… I'll just join Sasuke's team then," Sai slinked silently towards his cousin.
"Let's go outside… Okay, now START!"
"33 orange, 12 red, 98 blue, green 56, HUT!" Kiba shouted. He really had no idea what that meant but did it for effect anyways.
Neji threw the football back at him and Kiba caught it with ease. "Naruto, get open!" Kiba shouted, throwing the ball in Naruto's direction and he caught it.
Naruto started running but was tackled by Sasuke and they both came falling onto the soft grass. Sasuke had Naruto pinned under him gently yet firm. "Hey," he purred into Naruto's ear. Sasuke felt like him heart was going to burst but he really needed to tell Naruto.
"Get off him, Uchiha?" Neji demanded.
"Sasuke, my champ, get off poor Naruto," Gai ordered. Sasuke got off but only because his teacher asked him to.
"Whatever," Sasuke muttered under his breath. His confidence, once again, shrunk. His life really was miserable.
After P.E Sasuke hit the showers and dressed in his school uniform again.
"Sasuke that was so fierce," Sai teased, a cocky smile directed at Sasuke.
"Whatever, just when I get the courage everything goes wrong." Sasuke sighed in defeat. This is so unfair.
"So… what's your next class?" Sai asked he really didn't want a brooding Sasuke.
"I have science next. What's yours?" Sasuke asked without caring much.
"I don't know, whatever, let's skip," Sai suggested. Sasuke hadn't blamed Sai for wanting to do so, his first impression of the school is an overexcited teacher with bushy eyebrows, good guy pose and calls everyone champ or sport. Then there was Sakura who jumped Sai thinking it was Sasuke.
"My teacher is Naruto's guardian, I'm not going to skip. I need to have a good impression," Sasuke answered.
"You've had half the year to do that," Sai countered.
"I said impression not first impression!" Sasuke argued. He wasn't sure if Iruka-sensei was fond of him or not.
"Fine, whatever. I don't want to go to Jiraiya's class or whoever that is."
"No, you probably would find him interesting; he's a romance novel writer and a huge pervert. It's really entertaining," Sasuke disapproved remembering Friday when he stole porn from a student.
"Really..? That sounds fun. I should steal porn from other students too," Sai announced. He had a mischievous glint in his eyes, Sasuke didn't even want to know if Sai was lying or not.
"Well, I'll leave you to do that. I don't want to be late to class." Sai gave Sasuke a strange look before walking into Jiraiya's classroom. Is it that weird for me to want to go to class?
Sasuke arrived right at the bell. "Okay, class, today we will learn about our ear, does anyone know what this is?" Iruka-sensei asked, pointing to the auditory canal in the picture. Kiba's hand shot up and he waved it around furiously. "Kiba-kun, what is this?"
"It's the male reproductive organ," Kiba declared in a know-it-all way.
An awkward silence took place. What an idiot!
"Kiba, it's in the ear, it can't be the penis," Naruto whispered to his best friend.
"No, Kiba-kun, it's not the male reproductive organ," Iruka muttered. There was a blush on his face, spreading over his scar. "Does anyone want to give it a try?" Sasuke took this opportunity to impress his future father-in-law and his arm shot out. "Sasuke-kun?"
"It's the auditory canal, Iruka-sensei," Sasuke answered with ease. Itachi had taught him this in fifth grade.
"That is correct. Good job, Sasuke-kun." Iruka pointed to the eardrum. "Now can anyone tell me what this is?"
"It's the eardrum," Gaara replied. Sasuke glared at him, he was supposed to win Iruka over! Gaara was aware of this and looked at Sasuke with disdain.
"Very good, Gaara-kun," Iruka didn't even comment on how he didn't put his hand up, the usual lecture the teacher gives when a student calls out. Iruka started explaining how the ear works and how it helps us hear until the bell rang.
"Okay, for homework write an essay of how the ear works and what's in the ear. You're all dismissed." Hearing that, the students dispersed into the hallway of more students.
Sasuke walked to his next class, math AP with Zabuza. The thought sent shivers down his spine. Not in pleasure but in fear. Zabuza was aggressive and always yelled. He only favors one student, Haku. It's like their in love or something.
The school bell rang indicating that class is starting. Fuck! Zabuza is going to have my head for this! Sasuke ran as fast his he could to his math classroom. He knew he was already late but he needed to get there earlier so if Zabuza started yelling at him and another student comes in later, Zabuza would yell at the other student.
"Sasuke, you are late!" shouted Zabuza.
"Sorry, Zabuza-sensei," Sasuke apologized for the sake of his life.
"Sit down!" he ordered fiercely. Sasuke obeyed and sat in his usual seat.
"Who are you?" asked Zabuza. Sasuke looked up and saw Gaara standing at the doorway.
"I'm Gaara Sabaku, I'm new, the office lady said that this is the class and it's on my schedule," Gaara answered. How can he not feel intimidated? Sasuke mentally questioned.
"Okay, take a seat next to Sakura."
"Who's that?" Gaara questioned apathetically.
"The girl with bubble gum for hair," Zabuza answered pointing to Sakura who looked very offended.
"This is my natural hair color!" Sakura shouted, defending her hair. Gaara sat down and opened his backpack to get the equipment needed for this class and ignored the potential argument between Sakura and Zabuza.
"Is it from your mom's side or dad's?" Chouji inquired.
"My father has pink hair," Sakura replied.
"Is it normal for people to be born with pink hair (5)?" Chouji asked and resumed to eating. He really didn't think it would offend her much. They were… semi-friends.
"No, not really," Shikamaru answered sleepily.
"Stop making fun of Sakura and get to work!" Zabuza shouted. The class quieted down immediately and the only sound was led on paper and it was like that for the rest of the class.
-Electronics-
Sasuke's teacher Ibiki Morino is Idate's brother. Ibiki is also very very scarred. Literally. He had two big scars on his face that Sasuke noticed. He was too scared to stare straightly at him because it might be offending. He made the students make some kind of cyber mask that must talk and flash.
-Sasuke's house: living room-
"I'm home, everyone!" Sai announced loudly.
"Shut up! I'm watching television!" Sasuke shouted throwing a cup at Sai. Sai ducked just in time.
"What are you watching?" Sai asked looking at the television. An idea popped into Sai's head. "Oh, I know where to get the DVD's for that show." This caught Sasuke's interest.
"Really?"
"Yeah, of course, there's really nothing I can do with DVD's," Sai retorted.
"Can you get it for me?" Sasuke asked. He really liked this show.
"Sure, I'll go now." Sasuke was a bit suspicious of his cousin's intentions but he took the chance.
Sasuke heard the door close and resumed back to his show.
By six o'clock, Sai was back with the DVD's in his hand and a peculiar smile on his face. Sasuke didn't really take note of it. What caught Sasuke's attention; however, were Naruto, Gaara and Neji behind him. Why does he always bring Gaara and Neji over? Sasuke wanted to tell Sai to bring Naruto only next time.
"Here you go, 10200 yen (6)," Sai said, tossing the DVD's to Sasuke.
Sasuke checked the DVD's for any signs of danger or explosives and finding none he relaxed. "What show is it? Can we watch it with you?" Naruto asked.
"Sure, Naruto. It's just regular old show."
Naruto took a seat on the couch, Neji sitting on one side, Gaara on the other. Sasuke wanted to rip their heads off but he didn't. He put the DVD into the DVD player and took a seat next to the still smiling Sai.
"Press play," Sai suggested. Neji took the controller from the table and pressed the play button.
The screen went black and there were moaning noises. What the hell? Now there were two guys kissing each other naked and going at it. Neji's jaw dropped open and froze in place. Naruto turned away instantly, blushing madly. Gaara and Sasuke had a slight tint of pink on their faces and also looked away from the screen.
"What the hell is this, Sai?" Sasuke demanded.
"It is gay porn," Sai replied honestly. However, that was not the answer Sasuke was looking for. Sasuke didn't even know what answer he was looking for.
"Can you turn it off?" Gaara asked.
"Good idea," Neji replied, hitting the stop button. The screen didn't stop. The two actors were still… connected.
"Yes, it is a quite special tape," Sai commented.
"Make it stop," Sasuke pleaded. This is too embarrassing, especially in front of Naruto.
"Just go up and press stop," Sai instructed calmly.
"You go!"
"I'm not going; I don't want it to stop."
"Fine, Neji you go, you're the closest to the screen," Sasuke ordered.
Neji gruffly walked over to the DVD player and pressed stop. The DVD stopped and the screen went blank.
Awkward silence.
"So… I've got to get home now," Naruto said, breaking the silence.
"I'll walk you," Neji insisted.
"Okay."
Gaara glared at the Hyuuga and scoffed. Naruto and Hyuuga left. Gaara sat there for five seconds and announced he was leaving.
"Sai, you bastard!" Sasuke shouted throwing the DVD at Sai (who ducked in time as always).
Itachi came into the living room hearing the commotion. "What happened?"
"Sai was got porn and put it in an anime DVD case and Naruto, Neji and Gaara were here and saw it. We couldn't stop it with the controller so Neji had to go up and close the DVD," Sasuke whined.
"Right…" Itachi said indifferently. "Oh… about the Autumn Festival, who are you going to take as a date?"
Sasuke swallowed. He knew his brother was teasing him on purpose.
"Is it by any chance Naruto-kun?" Itachi asked fully knowing the answer.
"Itachi-niisan! I don't think he'd accept it though," Sasuke said with a frown. "Neji might be asking him. Or that kid, Gaara. It's not fair!"
"Sasuke, just ask him."
Raidou came in the room and ushered the tree Uchihas into the dining room indicating that dinner is ready.
"Oi Raidou what did you make?" Sai asked. Sasuke could tell he was hungry. Maybe Sasuke can have a little revenge. If it's soup he would put sleeping pills into it and make him drown in soup. If it's salad he would have leeches in it to eat Sai's face off.
"Tadaa! It's spaghetti!" Raidou proudly exclaimed unaware of ruining Sasuke's vengeful thoughts. Damn!
"It smells rather delicious," Itachi complimented eying the plates.
"Right, give it a try, I promise to not watch you eat this time." Sasuke hated it when Raidou did that, it was so freaky.
"That is much appreciated," Itachi politely said sitting down on a luxurious chair. Sai sat down next to him. Sasuke being wary of Sai's intentions checked his seat and flipped it over to check for bombs or whoopee cushions hidden in the chair. "What are you doing Sasuke?" Itachi asked.
"I'm checking for Sai's evil pranks," Sasuke answered.
"It should be fine, sit down Sasuke," Itachi ordered in his voice. His voice which everybody listened to.
"Fine, but if I end up blown into pieces you'd have to tell Mom and Dad that it's your fault for not letting me check my chair," Sasuke retorted. He cautiously sat down on his chair. Nothing happened.
"Sasuke, I wouldn't blow you up to bits. I see you have a low opinion of me," Sai said in a fake pained voice.
"Eat your food, Sai," Itachi commanded. Sai obeyed and continued eating his spaghetti.
"It's in the food, isn't it?" Sasuke asked poking the spaghetti with his fork.
"No, the porn thing was funny enough," Sai replied.
"That was not funny! Naruto was there, he probably thinks I'm some lonely thirty year old man that loves footy pajamas and gay porn!" Sasuke shouted.
"Don't shout at the table, Sasuke," Itachi was getting tired of ordering around his brother and cousin. "Naruto found out your footy pajama fetish? How?"
"They slept together," Sai answered for Sasuke. He makes it sound like there was more to it!
Itachi looked surprised. "You had sex." Itachi stated more than asked.
"No, we just slept together, nothing more unfortunately," Sasuke said taking a started eating his spaghetti. This was better than the last time Raidou made this.
"So… nothing happened?" Itachi pried.
"No."
"Why not?" Once Itachi said this Sasuke almost choked. He recovered after three minutes of hacking and coughing his lungs out.
"What do you mean why not? We just didn't!" Sasuke yelled.
"No yelling at the table, Sasuke. I mean any other person you would've done them without a second thought so why not Naruto? Do you not like him?" inquired Itachi.
"You make me sound like a slut, Itachi-niisan. It's because I like him. I don't want him to hate me because I did something. We're friends now but if I do make a move, we might be nothing," Sasuke explained a sad smile gracing his face.
"Don't be so down, Sasuke, Naruto's got to like you," Sai cheered trying to encourage his cousin.
"Not with you doing all these stupid pranks and making me look like a complete idiot!"
"No shouting at the table, Sasuke!" Itachi yelled. His voice is, as always, firm.
"But Itachi-niisan, you just shouted," Sasuke countered risking his life.
"You're right. Okay everyone no more shouting or yelling. And Sasuke, if he really likes you he shouldn't stop liking you or not like you because you look like a fool half the time Sai is around," Itachi said calmly.
"You're right, Itachi-niisan, Itachi-niisan!" Sasuke shouted with enthusiasm. Itachi gave up trying to get Sai and Sasuke to keep their voices down. It was completely pointless. He massaged his temples and continued eating his spaghetti.
-Sasuke's Room-
Sasuke took a shower and changed into normal pajamas. I should've done this yesterday. I'm so stupid, but what Itachi-niisan said was right. Sasuke logged on his account in the Konoha Online chat. Naruto is online. Sasuke double-clicked Kyuubi.
Avenger: Hello Naruto.
Kyuubi: hi Avenger.
Kyuubi: do u want something?
Avenger: Yes, I want you…
Kyuubi: excuse me?
Sasuke could not believe he just wrote that. Nope, no way! Yep, it was Sai, it was completely Sai. As if on cue, Sai walked into Sasuke's room and sat on his bed.
"What do you want?" Sasuke demanded.
"Nothing, nothing at all," Sai replied. He sat on the edge of the bed and peered at Sasuke's computer screen. "Let me guess… Kyuubi is Naruto and you are Avenger?" Sai asked.
"Yeah…" Sasuke said shamefully. He never meant to scare Naruto.
"Don't tell him who you are," Sai directed. Sasuke gave him a weird look.
"Why not?"
"So you can slowly pry into his life and see if he likes you," Sai responded with a sly grin. That's a great idea!
"Right… what do I say next?" Sasuke asked swallowing his pride. He would've never asked Sai for help in a million years if it weren't for Naruto. Sai noticed this too but decided not to tease him.
"Say that you were kidding."
Avenger: I was just kidding.
Kyuubi: okay…
Avenger: So… how are you doing Naruto?
Kyuubi: I don't even know who you are. What is your name?
"Sai, he's asking for my name," Sasuke said indifferently but on the inside he was panicking.
"Make up a name. Make it really common so he won't narrow it down," Sai replied. How can he be so calm? I guess he does this a lot.
Avenger: My name is Jin.
"How's that?" Sasuke asked.
"Pretty good. But even if it was a foolish name you can't take it back and say 'I'm not Jin, I'm Jacky or Bob or whatever."
"Whatever," Sasuke said indifferently. "So what do I say now? Do I ask him if he likes me?"
"That is the stupidest thing to do. Of course not! Wouldn't it be weird if a complete stranger named Jin came to you on an online chat and asked if you like Naruto? Don't be stupid," Sai snapped.
"Why are you so mad? It's my crush!" Sasuke argued defensively.
"Yes, I know that. Make small talk or whatever girls like," Sai instructed.
"Naruto is not a girl!"
"Ask him if he likes flowers."
"That makes me sound like a girly boy!"
"Just do it. And ask him about himself. It should make him feel special. How did you even get girls to date you?" Sai asked.
"My looks usually, girls at Konoha High are mostly shallow," responded Sasuke.
Avenger: Do you like flowers?
Kyuubi: they're okay. i like Ramen! you can't eat flowers but you can eat Ramen! Ramen is really good!
"He capitalizes ramen?" Sai asked, looking at Sasuke.
"Sometimes… Almost always. It's cute right?"
"It's amusing… It's amusing how he capitalizes ramen but not some other words that should be."
Kyuubi: do you like Ramen?
Avenger: Of course.
Avenger: Where do you live?
"What the hell, Sasuke?" Sai had a horrified expression on his face. "It's not normal to ask people you don't know and talked to for five minutes where they live!"
"It's not?"
"No!"
Kyuubi: I live in apartment 9 on Hokage Street (7).
"Is this guy stupid?" Sai thought out loud.
"Naruto is not stupid!" Sasuke angrily replied.
"I'm just joking. This is interesting."
There was a knock on the door and then silence. "Come in," Sasuke commanded.
"Sasuke-bocchama, Sai-bocchama, Itachi-sama wants to know if you are going to Akatsuki," the maid said.
"Do you want to?" Sai asked.
"Yeah sure," Sasuke answered.
Avenger: I'm going out, talk to you next time.
Kyuubi: bye!
He's so adorable! "Sasuke, aren't you going to change?" Sai asked.
"Yeah, wait for me." Sasuke changed quickly into black jeans and a black turtleneck.
Sasuke was able to get drunk and have some girl come over. He couldn't even remember what she looked like. When he woke up, he saw the girl was still there.
Who the hell is this girl? Sasuke pondered. Oh well, I'll get Itachi-niisan to escort her out or something. I hate it when they stay the whole night! Sasuke walked to the kitchen and saw Raidou cooking and Sai eating scrambled eggs with extra pepper and no salt. Sai is too specific!
"Ohayo, Sasuke!" Sai shouted with a mouthful of eggs.
"That's disgusting! Don't do that!" Sasuke yelled and turned around in disgust. "Do you know where Itachi-niisan is?"
"He is in his room," Raidou answered. "Do you want breakfast?"
"Not today."
Sasuke ran up the stairs into his brother's room and slammed open the door. "Itachi-niisan! The girl won't leave!" Sasuke whined. He knew he sounded like a complete brat but he didn't care.
"What girl?" Itachi asked turning around in his wheelie chair and taking his eyes off the computer to look at Sasuke.
"I don't know her name…"
"I'll take care of it. You should get to school; you're going to be late."
"Okay then I'll go now."
Sasuke went to the intercom and called for Hayate to drive him and Sai to school.
-Konoha High-
"Ohayo Sasuke, I have something to tell you," Shikamaru said lethargically.
"What is it Shikamaru?" Sasuke asked opening his locker.
"I heard," Shikamaru paused and yawned in Sasuke's face, "that Naruto likes someone." Sasuke could feel hope rushing through him but at the same time worry. What if it's not me? What if it's Neji or Gaara or some other person?
"Is it me?" Sasuke asked eagerly.
"I'm not sure, I heard it from Kiba when he was whispering to Shino about something," Shikamaru replied.
"Whatever," Sasuke said pretending he didn't care. I'll find Kiba in English. Why hadn't I thought about this before? Shikamaru really is a genius!
-English-
Sasuke knew his teacher, Kakashi, would be late so he took the opportunity to talk to Kiba. Sasuke needed to devise a plan to make Kiba separate from Naruto. Whatever, I'll just talk to Kiba.
"Kiba, I have to talk to you," Sasuke said.
"Why?" Kiba asked suspiciously.
"Just because…" Sasuke sent him the 'Uchiha death glare.' Kiba could feel a chill of terror on his spine. It made the hair on the back of his neck stand up.
"Fine," Kiba hesitantly said. Naruto looked at them curiously and continued doodling in his notebook. That's so cute!
Sasuke walked to the hallway with Kiba trailing closely behind. "Tell me," Sasuke whispered in an almost pleading tone.
"Tell you what?" Kiba asked. He was very confused why someone like Sasuke would even talk to him.
"Tell me who Naruto likes."
"I can't I told him that I'll keep it a secret," Kiba protested annoying the hell out of Sasuke.
"Tell. Me. Now!" Sasuke growled. He was definitely mad. Kiba wondered if he liked Naruto… nah!
Kiba swallowed. "Naruto likes… everyone."
"I'm serious! Who does he like as a crush?"
Kiba could feel the Uchiha's eyes bore into him. If he didn't tell he would get killed however if he did Naruto would be mad at him… At least Naruto would eventually forgive him.
Kiba took a deep breath and mentally apologized to his best friend. "The truth is Naruto really likes…" Sasuke and Kiba caught a flash of red. Gaara.
"What do you want?" demanded the Uchiha.
"I want to know too."
"Fine, fine. Okay Naruto likes…" Kiba started but was interrupted by a certain Hyuuga.
"Neji, what are you doing here?" Sasuke asked.
"I, too, would like to know who Naruto is interested in."
Kiba swallowed nervously. This is bad for his friendship with Naruto. Hopefully Naruto would forgive him for telling. "Without any more interruptions, the one Naruto really likes is…"
(1) Let's say Iruka dropped Naruto's clothes off for him.
(2) Hayate was the first examiner for the preliminary matches. The guy who's always coughing and got killed.
(3) Not all the students from grade eleven and twelve. It's just a mix of boys and girls from grade eleven and twelve.
(4) Sasuke should be able to catch up with Lee with his weights on… So I'm just guessing they're fast.
(5) Sorry to offend anyone who was born with pink hair. Just a little humor, I didn't mean to bash Sakura… Bash-ish…
(6) I don't know if that's too expensive or cheap for DVD's. Can someone tell me?
(7) Just something I made up. I picked number 9 because Kyuubi has 9 tails.
I'm trying to make it a cliffhanger but not really doing so well. I know people in grade eleven most likely won't learn about the ear but… yeah. So… there's chapter four. Please PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review!. Please review.