First of all glomps Kolie Thank you! She's my beta soyou have her to thank for correctin my grammer

Second glomps reviewrs I love you all, you rule! i cant belive the amout of reviews im getting. Thank you so much, you make me want to write more and more

Thanks so much to: Syaoran is kawaii, Himeino, Lady Tetsu-Maru, liz poling, lemur130, Yukita, Krys, Kitty in the Box, sailorsaturncosmo, Shindou404, Akevari, Bram, kanilla, Kolie, Yvonne, Blizzaga, Silver moon, tati, MyuMyu-chan, CutieCherry, memi, DreamingToThis, sikora, fatlazikat, lollyflop, tangerine-asuka, Takki, Jaya, tahci, escptheshdw835, sakura blossoms4, RoxiBabe, findingEMO, panatlantic, daftpunk, delia and Sutzina Zion. Whew i think thats everyone

Now to answer a few questions.

To StrawberryPockyPoo I havent seen anystory like mine Oo i got this idea ages ago. I have seen a story were their in collage though, maybe thats the one your talking about. And besides alot of stories have very similar plots. The ever famous Shuichi gets hurt and Eiri finaly realizes he loves him is one that turns up alot, and i know were this fict is going, i have it planed out to the end. so dont worry, even if thgeir similar to start with mine will be diffrent.

Yvonne: Im planning on writting about 15 chapters, depends on their length realy, but im aiming for 15.

Lady Tetsu-Maru blush thank you very much. Im realy glad you like this fict.

Himeino dont worry the good old conversation between Eiri and Hiro wil happen soon.

DreamingToThis takes out some supplys to the tent n.n hope your not too cold out there.

Ok as to the pairing who won, i have no idea n.n i havent counted yet so it'll all be a surprize when it happens.

Ok ive talke enough, on with the fict!

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Eiri managed to drag himself into the kitchen to get some coffee. He was so tired. His muse had suddenly decided to wake up and it had kept pestering him so he couldn't sleep, and he had had no choice but to write. So write he did, all night until he'd finished a second chapter. Now he was transformed from Eiri-the-not-morning-person to Eiri the living dead, and coffee was the only sure. He rapped his knuckles on the counter impatiently. Eiri hated expressions and he refused to believe in them, but they were stubborn too and seemed to want to prove him wrong. "A watched pot never boils." Eiri's eye was already twitching and the kettle seemed to be laughing at him, spouting little wisps of smoke.

A vein was now dangerously close to popping and Eiri was getting pissed when the kettle finally decided to bubble. It seemed to take another hour before it boiled, and Eiri finally managed to pour his coffee. After drinking it in one gulp, Eiri was almost human again.

Lessons would be starting soon and Eiri needed to make a start on his summer homework. Well, at least the English stuff. The wrath of the teacher was not something he wanted to invoke. His homework was still in the desk were he'd left it.

A week to do it should be ok. He was about to return to his room when he saw Shuichi sitting on the couch. He had a blanket draped over his shoulders and his eyes looked darker that ever, the shadows below them just added to the haunted look on his face. He looked as if he hadn't slept in weeks.

"Shuichi?" The boy turned the dark eyes on Eiri, and he couldn't help but flinch. He walked over and sat next to Shuichi.

"You ok?" A nod was all he got. They both just stared at the TV for a while. It was on mute so Eiri had no idea what was going on. It looked like one of those English soaps where everyone shouted at each other. Eiri thought it was probably best that is was on mute (Trust me I know n.n). Eiri then did what he did best ogle the girls. He was so bored that he actually he started giving them marks out of ten.

'Nice ass, good body, would look better with pink hair'

'Cute, but not as cute as Shuichi.'

'Urg boob job overload...' Eiri didn't even realize he was comparing the girls to Shuichi, amazing what the human mind could ignore.

A blond currently had a black haired girl by the hair and they were screaming at each other. Eiri sighed, this was boring. He was just about to get up and leave when he heard a little sniff. Looking to his left he saw Shuichi's head bowed low, his candy floss hair hung over his eyes, but it didn't hide the tears making tracks down his cheeks. Like rivers, they flowed towards his lips and chin, he was shaking slightly and sniffing, but no sobs were heard.

"Shuichi...?" he whispered. Eiri was at a loss, he didn't know what to do. For a start he didn't know why Shuichi was crying, so he had no idea how to comfort him or what to say. Eiri sat there uselessly watching Shuichi cry. Every tear seemed to burn into him, making his heart hurt for the boy.

"Shuichi," he whispered again, louder. The head was lifted a little to reveal violet eyes shining like jewels with the dew drops of tears. Shuichi's lip was quivering, and Eiri bit his own lip. Shuichi looked so pathetic. Eiri did the only thing he could think of, he wrapped his arms around Shuichi, drawing him close.

"Cry," he whispered. "If you need to cry, just cry. It's ok." Eiri felt a small hand lift slowly up and rest on his chest before it clenched tightly onto his shirt, as if he was afraid Eiri might disappear. Eiri gently rubbed Shuichi's back, his head resting on the pink hair that was buried in his chest. Eiri could feel the tears seeping through his shirt. Pretty soon Eiri wouldn't need a shower but he didn't mind. He liked holding the boy in his arms, so close, and so warm. One hand slowly travelled up Shuichi's back and into his hair. Eiri gently began to play with it while his other hand rubbed Shuichi's back.

The hair was soft as silk and smelled of strawberries. Eiri breathed deeply to catch more of the sweet smell, gently twisting the hair between his fingers and letting his hand gently dance over Shuichi's head. Eiri untangled his fingers from the pink hair and gently stroked Shuichi's head. All the way from the top of his head to the small of Shuichi's back Eiri's hand went, slowly soothing the boy.

Shuichi's tears seemed to have dried up but Eiri still held him and Shuichi stayed, moving his head slightly so his face wasn't in the wet patch on Eiri's shirt. Eiri's hand made one last journey down Shuichi's back before resting on the small of Shuichi's back.

Neither said a word for a while, and Eiri didn't dare break the spell. He wanted this moment to last forever. He felt more content with Shuichi in his arms than he did with any girl, and it still scared him. But he was too content to care.

Shuichi was the one to break the moment by slowly, reluctantly pulling away. Eiri let his grip loosen and Shuichi sat up, wiping away the last of his tears. He didn't look at Eiri but stared back at the TV.

"Better now?" Eiri asked kindly. Shuichi nodded a small thanks, but he still looked sad and troubled. The crying hadn't helped at all.

"I've got homework to do, so I'll be in my room if you need me. And you can put the sound up if you want." Eiri offered a smile to Shuichi but the boy didn't seem to notice. Eiri sighed and went to his room. He wasn't use to helping people, especially when he didn't know what was wrong. Eiri sat down at his desk and opened his laptop; he heard the door click and frowned slightly.

Shuichi had left. Eiri wondered if he should go after him. Shuichi was obviously upset, but Eiri decided Shuichi probably needed some alone time, which was probably the reason he had left. But it still didn't stop Eiri from worrying.

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Shuichi pulled the blanket around him tighter, padding barefoot through the corridor and ignoring all the stares he got. He needed to go see Hiro. Hiro was the only one who knew, who understood. He rubbed at his eyes again. Tears still threatened to fall even though he felt as if he had cried every last tear he could cry. Reaching his destination, he tapped timidly on the door, hoping his friend would be there. The door slowly opened only it wasn't Hiro. But the person did look very familiar.

He had short black hair and dark eyes. He was a negative of Yuki in Shuichi's eyes. Shuichi just stared and so did the boy. He raised an eye brow slightly, tilting his head to the side. His eyes travelled all over Shuichi, analysing him.

"You look just like Sakuma-sama." His hand came up and rested on Shuichi's cheek.

"Same build…" His hand slowly travelled down Shuichi's chest and whipped away the blanket. Shuichi let out a gasp and began to shake, but the boy didn't seem to notice. His hand was now travelling over Shuichi stomach and slowly reaching for his shirt.

"I wonder, how much like him you really are," the boy smiled devilishly, seeming not to notice the terrified look on Shuichi's face.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Eiri flipped through the papers. He hated homework. He glared at one particularly horrible assignment and threw it over his shoulder. That one was going to be left till last. His eyes landed on another assignment, one that wasn't his. He sighed.

"Nice try, Tatsuha," he muttered grinning slightly. His brother always tried to pull this trick, since they had been little, and not once was Eiri fooled. He got up and decided to pay his brother a visit.

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The boys hand was now under Shuichi's shirt slowly caressing his navel.

"You look very much like him." He slowly moved his head closer to Shuichi's ear.

"What say you and me have a little fun?" He was answered with a punch in the guts. He doubled over, coughing, and Shuichi ran. He didn't get far before he ran into something solid. Looking up he was meet by a pair of golden eyes.

"Shuichi?" Shuichi's eyes widened and he jumped to his feet, throwing his arms around Eiri, shaking slightly. Eiri's eyes widened in surprise, but he wrapped his arms around the boy any way. He then saw his brother stumbling out the door, hand clutched over his stomach.

"Tatsuha, what did you do to him?" Eiri asked angrily. Seeing his brother Tatsuha froze, he then preceded to pout then the waterfall tears came.

"It's not my fault he looks like Sakuma-sama. I didn't mean to scare him. I just love Sakuma-sama so much WWWWWAHHHHHHHH!" (cute anime tears)

"Well you terrified him you jerk! Sheeeash, and here's your homework." Tatsuha's tears stopped as he took the assignment sheet. His face fell as he realized Eiri hadn't done his work.

"Come in," Tatsuha muttered. Eiri tightened his grip on Shuichi and lifted him up to carry him into the room.

"You sure can punch hard kid. Sorry if I scared you." Shuichi was still clinging to Eiri but the shaking had stopped.

"His name's Shuichi and he doesn't talk," Eiri explained. Tatsuha nodded and looked around the room for something.

"Where is it?" he muttered as he proceeded to rip the room apart. Eiri sighed again. His brother was weird.

"THERE YOU ARE!" he shouted triumphantly, holding a DVD box above his head.

"Shuichi, Shuichi, Shuichi!" He bounded up to the couch where Eiri sat with Shuichi on his lap still holding onto him.

"Shuichi, Shuichi, look!" Shuichi slowly turned his head to look at Tatsuha, and his eyes widened at what he saw. In his hand Tatsuha held a super rare Nittle Grasper DVD. It had all kinds of footage on it that was impossible to find, and the DVD it self was even rarer.

"Shuichi, I'll let you borrow this tape if you accept my apology and be friends," Tatsuha smiled sweetly. From horny devil to sweet kid in .5, Eiri rolled his eyes.

Shuichi nodded slowly and took the DVD from Tatsuha, he stared at it for a second before looking back at Tatsuha. He then smiled a little and nodded again.

"YAY!" Tatsuha jumped in the air and gave a little victory dance. Shuichi looked at Eiri worriedly.

"Don't worry he's always like that," Eiri muttered, darkly glaring at his idiot brother. "He's 18. You'd think he'd have grown up by now."

"Hey you want anything to drink?"

"Beer," Eiri said.

"I wasn't talking to you, aniki! I was talking to Shuichi." Shuichi shook his head, so Tatsuha sat down.

"Where's my beer!" Eiri asked, getting a bit pissed. He hated it when his brother ignored him.

"Get it yourself." Tatsuha said poking his tongue out. Eiri growled and got up, dumping Shuichi on the floor. Shuichi gave a startled yelp and scurried back onto the sofa, and Eiri stormed into the kitchen. This was exactly why he and his brother couldn't share. They'd have killed each other within a week.

Tatsuha had now put the Nittle Grasper tape into the DVD player and some concert was blaring out of the TV. Shuichi seemed to have cheered up a bit and was happily watching the TV with Tatsuha. Feeling he was not needed, Eiri decided to leave.

"Well, I got homework to do. See ya later." He walked out drinking his beer and cursing his brother.

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Sitting in his room, Eiri found the dorm too quiet. Shuichi didn't make any noise, but somehow without the boy there things were quieter. Eiri shook his head. He was heading for a migraine if he carried on, and he really should start on that homework. Damn, he thought he'd escaped homework when he'd left school.

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By the time Hiro returned from wherever he'd been, Shuichi and Tatsuha had watched two concerts, every music video, and were now starting on the backstage footage.

"Hey, Shu, I see you met Tatsuha. Thought you'd get along with him. He's the only guy I've met with a Nittle Grasper obsession to rival yours." He smiled and sat down next to his friend. Tatsuha was pouting and trying to decide whether Hiro was being mean or nice. Hiro laughed at the expression on Tatsuha's face.

Shuichi tugged at Hiro's shirt sleeve and pointed towards his room, indicating that he wanted a word. Hiro nodded and looked at Tatsuha.

"Don't worry I'm gone. I know when I'm not wanted." he said, and proceeded to walk out the door, happily humming some old Nittle Grasper song.

"So, Shuichi, what's wrong?" Shuichi handed Hiro the pad where he'd already written his note.

'I had another nightmare. It was worse this time. I saw everything, again. Hiro, I'm scared. Why can't I just forget what happened!'

The page was splashed with tears and the ink was smudged. Hiro sighed. He wished he could take all of his friend's pain away and throw it into the deepest abyss. He wrapped his arms around his friend.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there to help you." Shuichi snuggled up to Hiro and sighed. He could feel the tears coming again and hated it, he hated being so weak.

Hiro let Shuichi cry, hugging him and not saying anything. It was always best this way. Hiro never knew what to say, and knowing what had happened made things worse. He felt he should have been able to do something to stop what had happened, but, no matter how many times Shuichi said it wasn't Hiro's fault, Hiro still felt he could have done more.

Shuichi had stopped crying now, but Hiro still held him tight. He wished they could have shared a dorm. It was a lot easier to help Shuichi in the night that way. No matter what, Hiro couldn't stop the nightmares, but he could be there for Shuichi when he woke up.

"Feel a bit better now." Shuichi shook his head staring at the floor. Hiro sighed.

"If you ever want to talk, no matter what time, I'll be here. Okay?" Shuichi just nodded.

"I'm sorry I can't be there for you in the night." Shuichi just shook his head and gave Hiro a small smile, showing that he didn't mind and that Hiro shouldn't worry. Hiro didn't seem convinced, but there was nothing he could do.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooo

After talking for a bit longer, Hiro walked with Shuichi back to his dorm. Shuichi held the Nittle Grasper DVD in his hands as if it were the most delicate treasure. Hiro smiled. The DVD would help Shuichi more than some would think. At the door Shuichi let himself in and waved goodbye to Hiro.

Eiri was nowhere to be found when he got in. Not in the living room, kitchen, or bathroom, and his coat was there so he couldn't have gone out. The only place he hadn't checked was Eiri's bedroom. Shuichi tapped at the door cautiously but there was no answer. He knocked again, and still no answer. Tentatively, he opened the door.

Shuichi smiled a little. Eiri had fallen asleep at his desk, head resting on his laptop. His mouth hung open slightly and he was making small snoring sounds. The screen of the laptop held hundreds of hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh where Eiri's head was leaning on them. Shuichi gently shook Eiri's shoulder but all he got was a mumble and another snore. Shuichi sighed. There was no way Shuichi could carry Eiri to his bed. He gently moved the laptop from under Eiri's head and got a pillow and blanket from the bed. He placed the pillow under Eiri's head and draped the blanket over Eiri's shoulders. He then quietly left the room, closing the door with a little click.

Getting his headphones from his room Shuichi connected them up to the TV so he could watch the DVD and not have the noise disturb Eiri.

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Eiri woke up surprisingly comfortable, considering the last thing he remembered was writing some more of his book. He sat up and winced. His back ached. He looked at the laptop and saw it had gone on screensaver, one movement of the mouse and Eiri was faced with and endless crowd of gibberish. He promptly deleted the gibberish and was thankful to find his story still intact.

He wondered briefly who'd given him the blanket and pillow before reasoning that it could have only been Shuichi. He smiled at this thought. Looking at the clock he noticed that it was 2 am. Eiri glared at the clock, he was rarely up at this time unless he had a deadline. He stumbled to his bed and fell down. He was too tired to change and was asleep as soon as his head hit the mattress.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

When Eiri woke, Shuichi was on the sofa again. He looked as if he hadn't slept all night. He had headphones on and was watching the Nittle Grasper DVD his brother had lent to him. Eiri stood in front of Shuichi to show him he was there, then he sat down next to him. Shuichi took his headphones off and looked at Eiri. Shuichi had bags under his eye you could carry your luggage in and he looked drained. Eiri frowned. He didn't look at all good. He gently touched Shuichi's forehead, and the boy jumped a bit but didn't pull away.

"You don't have a fever, so what's wrong? You look terrible." Shuichi looked away, showing he didn't want to talk about it, but Eiri was like a dog with a bone and he wasn't about to give up. He gently grabbed Shuichi's chin and turned his head to face him.

"Why haven't you been sleeping? It's not good for you." Shuichi looked away but his head was held firmly by Eiri so all he could do was turn his eyes away. He blinked, already feeling the tears coming.

'I don't want to cry. I've had enough of crying... but... I can't... I'm so weak.'

The tears slowly made their way down Shuichi's cheek and landed on Eiri's hand.

"Shuichi..." Great he'd made the kid cry. "Please don't cry." But this seemed to make Shuichi cry harder. So Eiri pulled the boy close and let him cry onto his chest again.

Shuichi gripped Eiri tightly, so tight Eiri flinched as he felt the boy's nails dig into him. Shuichi's body shook with sobs and Eiri felt his heart shattering with each sob. He held the boy tighter, at a loss for words. No words seemed right to comfort the boy.

"What happened to you, Shuichi, what happened?" Eiri wondered. He felt a burning hate for whoever had done this to Shuichi, and he knew he'd kill them if he ever found out. He held Shuichi even tighter, pulling him onto his lap. He gently stoked his pink hair, still not knowing what to say.

After a while, Shuichi grew quiet. The tears had dried up but Eiri's shirt was soaked, but he didn't care. Looking down he noticed that Shuichi had fallen asleep. He looked so peaceful, just like the last time he'd fallen asleep in Eiri's arms. He smiled at the memory. He could still feel the bump he'd received and remembered the fear in Shuichi's eyes. The smile faded and a serious expression came. He vowed that, whatever had happened, he'd take care of Shuichi and help him in any way he could.

Eiri didn't understand why, but there was something about Shuichi, something that made him like the boy instantly. Eiri felt comfortable with Shuichi and happy when he held the boy in his arms. He wished he could hold him forever. He gently brushed the hair from Shuichi's eyes and sighed.

These feelings growing inside him, he didn't understand them but he was determined to help Shuichi anyway. Eiri blushed slightly as a realization came to him. It was the nightmares that kept Shuichi awake, and it was in Eiri's arms that Shuichi seemed to be able to sleep peacefully. He gulped slightly. Great, just great. The sofa was no place to sleep and Eiri never shared his bed with anyone without certain activities being involved. He sighed. But for Shuichi, he guessed he could make an exception.