Insert run-of-the-mill introduction. Please review. Please.
The instant that the last syllable left Anko's mouth, Banjin sprang into action. Despite knowing full well the power of a tokubetsu jonin, due to his uncles' brutal training spars before and after their various promotions, Banjin still believed that the fight would be easy. The only living creatures with two x chromosomes he had ever met were fangirls, all of whom he could have beaten blindfolded. In his mind, girls simply couldn't win against guys. So, he threw a punch at his sensei in all confidence that it would hit.
However, contrary to Banjin's beliefs, a great many females could kick his gender's ass. The Godaime Mizukage was a woman, as was the widely considered second-strongest member of the Sannin. Anko wasn't quite in the same league as those Kunoichi, but she was more than a match for twenty of Banjin. The punch was dodged and countered faster than the young boy's eyes could track. Anko didn't believe in holding punches even for little kids, so the ninja-wire specialist flew a good ten feet from the impact. The boy moaned and clutched his abdomen, before falling limp: the pain had knocked him out.
Shima panicked at the display of strength, and started to wildly fling kunai at Anko, with a pitiful amount of strength. Anko plucked one out of the air and used it to deflect the others. The snake mistress then threw the kunai at Shima, who barely dodged the speeding knife. Using a quick Kawarimi, Anko appeared behind the girl and gave a swift chop to the neck, knocking her out for a spell.
Anko turned to face Megami, who hadn't moved an inch. "Two down in less than a minute; what the hell's wrong with the Academy? In my day, first years did better than this." Megami simply shrugged. "You going to talk, or am I just gonna kick your ass like I did with your teammates?" No response. "Have it your way then." Fast as thought, Anko rushed forward, her hand already forming into a jab to hit a pressure point that would freeze the girl more effectively than a winter in Yuki no Kuni.
The hit connected… and the girl dispersed into smoke. 'What? Kage Bunshin?' was all that went through Anko's head, before her danger sense went off the scale. Anko jumped to the right out of pure instinct. A foot came down where her head had been two seconds ago, creating a crater when it impacted the ground. The foot belonged to Megami, whom turned and threw a kunai straight at Anko. She didn't need to say it, but she did so out of kindness. "Kage Kunai no Jutsu," she said.
Anko's eyes widened as the one kunai multiplied into twenty. However, she wasn't being considered for Jonin rank for nothing. With incredible speed and flexibility, Anko twisted and dodged around every single kunai. If she wanted a break, she was disappointed. With speeds Anko didn't believe possible for someone that young, Megami rushed forward and engaged Anko in taijutsu, a strange faint purple glow around her.
Anko dodged every punch, though barely. Anko couldn't believe the power behind the blows; afterimages trailed after each fist, and tiny gusts of wind were born from the force of each attack. Anko involuntarily compared it to the time she had challenged the psyche ward escapee Maito Gai to a spar. After ten more seconds, her luck ran out. Megami, with no mercy, delivered a kick that cracked every rib in Anko's chest. At least, it would have, had not Anko turned into a mass of wet brown.
Before Megami could even react, the real Anko jumped over the fence from where she'd been hiding in the forest and rushed forward to punch the blonde right in the back of the head. Said aspiring Kunoichi collapsed into smoke. Anko cast her senses out, searching for her potential student, before bringing her fingers into the Tora seal and muttering "Kai." With a slight pulse of chakra, Anko dispelled the genjutsu cloaking Megami, having her appear a few feet away from Shima.
"When'd you make that genjutsu?" Anko asked, staring at the only of her three potential students to put up a challenge. Anko, as she spoke, took notice of what she had ignored out of arrogance: an invisible aura of danger cloaking the blonde girl. Danger is a vague and abstract thing, and only a rare few can exude it the way this girl was. There were only two other people that Anko knew who gave off that aura: the Hokage in a bad mood, and her former sensei.
Megami shrugged, before replying "Around the same time you made that Tsuchi Bunshin, i.e. before I came here. It was a Kage Bunshin that ran here. I knew that 'the crazy snake lady' practically lived in the Forest of Death, so I just made the clone, did a shunshin, and cloaked myself before you arrived. I'm rather disappointed that you didn't notice me. I wouldn't want my sensei to be inadequate at genjutsu." She then indicated her two incapacitated teammates.
"I needed to see how you fought, so I let these guys flail around a bit. From what I can tell, you focus on subterfuge and quick takeouts. You'll send a clone before you go in yourself, and you prefer debilitating pressure points and nerve clusters to an all-out taijutsu showdown. You have a strong Doton affinity, though you have some Katon, and you keep your snake techniques in back-up. You have no weapon preferences outside kunai and shuriken, though you can use senbon to great accuracy. You've trained yourself in speed and reflexes rather than strength and stamina; what's the point of outlasting your opponent if you can take him out with one blow? You are willing to use your seduction skills in combat if you have to, hence your revealing clothing. All in all, you're formidable, but easily defeated with the right strategy."
Anko stared in shock, and rightly so. In the ninja world, to have an opponent know your strengths was to have your death warrant signed. It didn't matter if you were a lowly genin or a Kage: one exploited weakness, and you were dead. If your enemy knew how you fought, then he could plan how to counteract it. To have this random girl proclaim a word-for-word account of Anko's personal style was, in a word, astounding.
"What are you, a stalker? How did you find that out about me?" Anko had no idea who this girl was, but it was blindingly obvious that she wasn't an average genin, at the very least. Anko momentarily debated between undercover ANBU and foreign spy. Megami grinned, and explained her methods in a kind, yet gloating tone.
"Chakra is like a fingerprint; given enough time, I can use a form of chakra-sensing to map out a person's entire mode of combat. Your chakra has a memory, just like your muscles. I can read which jutsu you use as if they were written across your forehead, and tell your weapon preferences and taijutsu based on how your chakra 'remembers' moving when you were training or fighting someone. It takes tons of concentration, but with my genjutsu, I can hide until I've finished, as I just did."
Megami then, in a slightly ominous manner, cracked her neck and her fingers. Anko, pushing her surprise at the ingenious and near impossible method back, readied herself for an assault. Then, with a grin that sent a shiver up even Anko's spine, Megami put her hands into a cross-shaped seal. "Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu," she uttered into silence, before the clearing was absolutely spammed with clones. Anko got the distinct feeling that she was in the eye of a blonde-and-black hurricane.
"Now that the warm-up's over, let's fight!" The words came from every direction in eerie synchronicity, sending chills up the spine of any creature with auditory capabilities. In a flash, Anko was attacked on all fronts. The horde of Megami clones rushed forward, the closest ones charging forward at incredible speeds with the same odd purple glow as before, while the ones near the back started to throw kunai and shuriken like party favors. In the confusion, the real Megami picked up her two teammates and disappeared in a sudden haze.
Anko stared at the onslaught of oncoming death, and smiled like she'd just been given a lifetime supply of dango. "Kid, you've just made my day." With that, Anko moved.
Her speed from before looked like a snail's crawling compared to her sudden agility. The Megami clones doing close-combat might as well have been standing still. Anko looked like a striking cobra: she would disappear without a sign, only to reappear and strike with lightning speed at a clone, dispelling it, before disappearing again. She was a viper, stealthily approaching the prey before lashing out faster than human eyes could perceive. The army of copies seemed to be spontaneously erupting into smoke.
The storm of kunai and shuriken that filled the air either hit nothing but air, or seemed to lose all kinetic energy and fall dead to the ground. The projectiles that suddenly lost momentum were the only warning as to where Anko was, not that it helped. If a clone stood in Anko's way, it died. In the milliseconds in which she could be seen, an ear-splitting grin adorned her face.
Megami winced from her hidden perch in one of the few trees in the area. She was getting about three days' worth of memories of getting killed by Anko. They were small pains, considering how fast the deaths came, but they built up. Luckily, Megami had long since discovered an interesting side-effect of prolonged use of the Kage Bunshin no Jutsu. You know how people sometimes say 'one part of me says… another part says…'? In Megami's case, it was literal; her mind was so accustomed to splitting itself to form Kage Bunshin that her mind was now literally in pieces. She wasn't crazy, by any definition of the word, but she could now assign different tasks to different parts of herself, effectively thinking many things at once. She was 'master' and they were 'subordinates' that supplied her with the result to whatever question or task she assigned them. It was a life-saver with the Kamiken; it would have been impossible otherwise to maintain the total focus needed to keep all eight gates cracked without accidentally opening them all and killing yourself. Now, it was handled by one of the 'mini-minds'.
As her sensei kicked her ass repeatedly, Megami crouched over her two teammates, preparing to wake them up. Megami had numerous medical jutsu held in back-up, on the off chance her near-regenerative healing abilities didn't cut it. She also had two or three packets of smelling salts in a storage scroll, just in case. She used none of these, preferring a rather ruder approach. Frankly, Megami didn't believe that the two had earned the use of her personal supplies or the concentration needed to force the liquid chaos that was her chakra in the gentle preciseness of Tsunade's art. So, she used chakra to gather moisture from the air, chilled it with the proper application of more chakra, and dumped the now-ice-cold water on the heads of Shima and Banjin. It was impolite, but effective. The two were up and sputtering in seconds.
"Where the fuck am I?" Banjin asked, quite rudely, while Shima seemed to be convulsing from looking around her to find out where she had awoken. Megami gave them both relatively light bonks on the top of the head to catch their attention. "Shut up, Banjin. My clones aren't going to keep Anko-sensei busy forever." Banjin, while rubbing his head, took stock of his surroundings for the first time, before outright gaping at the sea of clones that were being systematically dispatched by his new teacher.
"How the heck is she moving that fast? Not even my dad can move that fast, and he's a Jonin! She's just a Tokubetsu, and even more, she's a she! What's going on?" Banjin could do nothing but stare at the area where his sensei was moving. Men were better than women, in every way! How could some no-name lady just being considered for Jonin rank be moving faster than his dad? Banjin just sat there as his world went slightly askew as one of its key foundations was challenged.
Shima spoke up, answering Banjin's rhetorical question. "My mommy mentioned her once. Her sensei was Orochimaru, the Orochimaru, strongest of the Sannin. When he went rogue, everyone assumed she was a spy for him. She was demoted from a lieutenant in the ANBU to a Chunin. The Council tried to make sure that she wouldn't get back, but Hokage-sama was more forgiving, and kept the heat off her. My guess is that she had to fight tooth and claw to get where she is now. If she's faster than your dad, it's probably since she's trained herself into the ground to get back into the elite; if she started out in ANBU, I don't even want to guess how strong she is now." Shima shivered as she watched another hundred of Megami's clones simply disappear while she talked.
Megami raised an eyebrow. "For an Uchiha fangirl, you're surprisingly smart. Yes, she fell from grace because no one trusted old snake-face. No one has the balls to do something outright mean to her, but the Council didn't get where it is by playing by the rules. If my research is right, her Jonin test was sabotaged six different times. An ANBU at fourteen, and she's just now is getting a chance at being a full-fledged Jonin. Man, aren't we lucky that our sensei is such a badass?"
Shima frowned at the excessive language, but nodded in agreement upon seeing Anko throw a clone with enough force to dispel the ten behind it, in the space of a second. Banjin, meanwhile, was experiencing a bit of a breakdown at seeing a female firsthand outclassing his dad, the strongest person he knew. Men were better than women, right? Right. Right?
Megami snapped to get there attention, before laying out a plan that, with a bit of luck, would bring their sensei down. With Shima shaking and Banjin slightly vacant, they agreed. They waited until Anko had cleaned up the last of the clones, before they struck. Anko looked up to see all her pupils conscious and waiting for her, Megami in the front. Anko grinned and said "I gotta say, you're good Blondie. The old man said you were special, but I just thought that he was just being kind. Now, I see he was right. But, that doesn't change the fact that I'm going to kick your ass, and the other kids' as well."
Megami grinned, before speaking seven very intimidating syllables: "Don't underestimate us." With that, Banjin and Shima Henge'd into Megami, and said blonde deactivated half her weights. The chakra surge from the release made the hairs on the back of Anko's neck stand at attention. Then, without further ado, Megami formed what was quickly becoming a very unpleasant seal. "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu," was said, and the clearing was filled once again.
Anko, slightly more cautious, moved at the same level of speed that she had before. It was that caution that saved her, as the clones were keeping up! They weren't moving as fast as she was, but they were moving fast enough that Anko now had to dodge if she didn't want to get hit, and her blows might be dodged. Instead of standing still, the clones were moving in slightly slower motion. That didn't stop Anko from taking down a fair few, but now she had to watch out for punches and kicks that were sure to pack some serious firepower.
A few seconds later, Anko was treated to another pleasant shock: Anko had lunged for a particularly slow clone, forgetting in the heat of battle to be suspicious. Her fist phased right through the clone, revealing it to be a simple Bunshin. Anko realized an instant too late that it was one of Banjin's or Shima's, right before the nearest clone kicked her in the side. Anko flew ten feet, knocked into a few clones, and grimaced as the lancing pain informed her that she had at least two cracked ribs. Damn, this girl was freakishly fast and strong, with a helluva lot of chakra to boot.
Anko didn't have time to lick her wounds, as a wall of kunai was suddenly launched at her, while she was still getting back on her feet. She didn't know which were Bunshin and which weren't, so the purple-haired sensei was forced to dodge them all. There were a few slip-ups, and now Anko had a few shallow cuts to go with her broken floating ribs. Anko was forced to admit that the strategy was good: bombard with Kage Bunshin, mix in Henge'd Bunshin, and catch the enemy when they were caught off guard. She would have marveled at its genius, had she not currently been the victim.
Anko continued on, being much more careful to not overextend, but she couldn't keep up. Bunshin were self-sustaining until dispelled, and the blonde girl had seemingly unlimited chakra to use for more Kage Bunshin. Five minutes later, Anko was a little worse for wear, and she hadn't even touched any of the real kids: a few times when she'd slowed down to hit the super-slow Bunshin on the off chance they were the real thing, she had sensed a Kawarimi before she had hit a solid Kage Bunshin. She had to slow down so she wouldn't fumble if it was a Bunshin, and that gave the real kids the time to substitute with another clone.
The sad part was Anko knew the perfect way to clear away all the clones. But, that would mean the brats would pass, because Jutsu Anko had in mind was the Kuchiyose. Anko wasn't quite that desperate yet, though, and she had a few tricks still up her sleeve. Taking a deep breath, Anko started to perform hand seals faster than a hummingbird's heartbeat. Gathering the necessary chakra, Anko yelled as a battle cry "Doton: Doryuudan!"
A dragon's head made of mud rose up at Anko's feet, before spitting out numerous globs of mud at about 1000 ft per second. Clones were dispelled by the bucketful, and in less than ten seconds, the field was alone except for her, the blonde, and the other two gasping gaki, who were a fair distance away. Poor dears, they'd probably spend more chakra doing all those Kawarimi than they had to spare. "It was a good plan, but it didn't work out." Anko said, slightly condescendingly to the oddly calm Megami.
The blonde girl merely grinned evilly before saying "Banjin, begin phase two." Anko blinked, before she became disturbingly aware of all the ninja wire there was on the ground around her. The boy grinned, before pulling back his fingers and saying "Yougan Waia(1)" In an instant, all the wires were cherry-red as the boy's fire chakra ran through them, before they followed the pull of his fingers and closed around Anko. 'Kuso,' was all Anko thought, before she performed a hasty Kawarimi with one of the many fallen kunai. The kunai she had left in her place was cut to pieces by the sharp, burning ninja wire.
Without even looking at her, Megami said "Shima, phase three." The brunette nodded, before bringing her hands up in a one-handed seal. Anko looked at the other kunai surrounding her, and said only five words. "Are you fucking kidding me?" she said, before the exploding tags wrapped around the hilts of the kunai around her activated, and did as their name implied. A little known fact of the Kawarimi no Jutsu is that it has a short recharge period. It was small, nigh unnoticeable, but it was there, and Anko was stuck in the middle of it. So, Anko had no choice but to try and minimize the damage.
The explosion was spectacular, going up in a mushroom cloud of red fire and black smoke. The force of it blew back the hair of the three genin, while their sensei was a little more unlucky. A black ball, trailing smoke, blew out of the cloud, bouncing along the ground before coming to a stop. The ball groaned, moaned, and finally stood up, to reveal a sooty, burned, barely decent Anko, who looked very, VERY pissed.
"YOU FUCKING BRATS! THOSE WERE MY FAVORITE CLOTHES! LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE TO ME! I LOOK THE WHORE WHO WORKS AROUND THE FURNACE IN THE COAL MINE! I'M GOING TO FUCKING KICK YOUR PUNY, VIRGIN, SHIT-PRODUCING ASSES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Anko was seeing red, and all she wanted in life at that moment was to rearrange her student's internal organs. She felt as if the heat of her anger should be literally burning the kids to cinders. To add to the intimidation effect, the chakra surge from her fury reacted to its natural element, and the ground gave off a few respectable tremors.
Shima and Banjin were quivering with exhaustion and fear. Dodging their sensei's punches with substitutions had been tiring, and the adrenaline backlash was starting to kick in. However, Megami was still normal: calm, collected, and ready for anything. She tossed her teammates a few soldier pills, and said "Rest up; I'll handle phase four." Her peers gratefully sat down, while Banjin started to crush his first soldier pill between his teeth. Walking smoothly with a born ninja's grace, Megami stepped up to face Anko.
The woman was almost foaming at the mouth, and didn't waste time yelling. She just went straight to the point and blew a fireball as big as Megami's apartment straight at the unmoving girl. "Katon: Goukakyuu no Jutsu" Anko cried, way past caring if the Hokage got on her case for sending her students to the hospital… or morgue. Megami stood still, facing down the fireball, admiring its beauty and feeling its heat on her face. Just as the flaming sphere came within blistering distance, Megami grabbed one of her favorite weapons.
Anko was waiting to hear the delicious scream of a burning girl, before her fireball fucking split in half! Megami stood in the exact same position as before as the symmetrically perfect halves of the fireball passed by her sides, burning out as they did so. The only difference was the chain whip now grasped in her right hand. Anko, if possible, was even more furious. "How the fuck did you split that fireball you father-fucking, cock-sucking, child whore?!"
Megami raised an eyebrow, but explained in clipped, business-like tones, with only the faintest hints of smugness. "I'd like to introduce you to a friend of mine. Meet Stem, my slicing whip. With the application of my wind chakra, I can make this whip cut through carbon steel or even certain jutsu. I've trained with her for years, and I dare say I've mastered her." In a flash, Megami whipped her blade in a low arc, cutting off dozens of grass stalks, sending them into the air. In the same movement, she flicked the whip back, cutting the stalks in half again. With a few complicated wrist movements, she gouged the Konoha symbol into the ground at her feet, the stalks falling into the gaps.
Megami held her whip again, smiling. Anko twitched: now she was up against a fast, strong, resourceful, chakra-loaded blonde chick with a fucking wind-powered whip? Anko wasn't very religious, but she sent up a quick prayer. 'Amateratsu-sama, I don't know what I did to annoy you, but whatever it is, I'm really, really sorry. Can you please help me with this a little?' However, the queen of the Kami was too busy dealing with Ninigi's latest blunder to answer Anko's prayers, leaving her to face an enemy of unknown power while sooty and irritable.
Never let it be said that Anko backs down from a fight. After confirming that no divine intervention was going to come, the dango-addict rushed forward at the speed of thought, lashing out with her very best taijutsu. The purple glow returned around Megami, and suddenly she was avoiding every single attack, while finding time to land a few long yet shallow cuts with her whip. Anko jumped back, wondering how this girl, who had spent half her life disguised as a boy, could be faster than her. The only people faster than her in terms of sheer speed were Maito Gai and his clone of a student with their weights off. Provided, this girl could just be going off reflexes, but she was still moving fast enough to avoid and counterattack a de jure B-rank de facto low S-rank kunoichi.
Reduced to stalling for time to think up a plan, Anko asked "You've been glowing throughout this whole test. What the hell is that?" Megami grinned and said "Seeing as you'll be teaching us, I think I can tell you. I've trained myself from the age of six in the lost style of the Kamiken, a highly-dangerous but effective fighting style. By 'loosening' the Hachimon or eight inner gates inside me, my body can function much more efficiently than it would normally. The excess chakra sort of 'massages' my organs, leaving my harder for blows, my tendons tighter for speed, my bones harder for dealing with damage, and my brain faster for reacting to my enemy's actions. Sure, a little mistake and I are at best in the hospital and at worst in a grave, but I get to kick the ass of anyone who annoys me, regardless of rank. I'm still wearing weights, for crying out loud."
Anko gawked. If what she said was true, the style was life-threatening, monstrously difficult to master, and generally idiotic to learn. Then again, she was having her perfectly-toned ass being handed back to her, so maybe she shouldn't be judgmental. However, she wasn't given much time to come to grips with it, as Megami's teammates had been given enough time to rest. On a soldier pill-high, the two of them leapt forward to Megami's side. Banjin remarked "For girls, you two aren't half bad. And I'm not just saying that because I'm shell-shocked." Shima rolled her eyes and said "If you're general disdain of the female character since the second year of the academy is anything to go by, I'd say it is because you're in shock."
Anko blinked in surprise at the one-eighty in her other two students' attitudes. She looked accusingly at Megami and asked "Are you using some mind-control genjutsu or something?" Megami shook her head, amused, and replied "Well, after Banjin realized that it isn't written in stone that males are superior after watching you, and I informed Shima that any chance she'd have with Uchiha-teme would be shot if she failed (though I'd consider that a good thing she whispered sotto voce), they were actually pretty easy to talk to. Hence the plan to beat you that so far has worked perfectly."
Anko grimaced, as she just knew what was coming next. Her fears were given from as Megami said, quite ominously "Team 4, begin phase five." In a surprising turn of events, Megami turned and held a kunai at Shima's throat. Before Anko could be surprised at the treachery, she felt the strangest sucking sensation before the kunai was held against her throat. Automatically, Anko batted the hand away, while Banjin took the time used in the action to throw wire-trailing shuriken at her.
Anko, aware of what Banjin could do with wire, grabbed a kunai and cut the wire while dodging the throwing stars. Megami, however, recovered from the slapped hand and threw the kunai with deadly accuracy. Anko dodged it easily, but failed to notice the damned exploding tag until she head the sizzling. The explosion was much smaller, but it still threw Anko a few feet forward from the concussive force, knocking her straight into the waiting arms of Shima, who had recovered from the Kawarimi.
Maybe it was from all the practice glomping Sasuke despite his efforts to keep her off, but Shima just didn't let go after grabbing hold of Anko. She wrapped her legs around Anko's waist, wrapped her arms around the older woman's shoulders to restrict her arms, and held on for all she was worth. Unusual it was, but so too was it effective, for Anko found that she couldn't move against the iron grip of the Uchiha fangirl. This gave Banjin time enough to throw another few strands of constricting wire, which would lead to Megami holding a blade to her throat.
Anko sighed at being forced to use this against children, but it was required. "Senei Jashu!" cried Anko, before numerous vipers appeared from her charred sleeves, gripped Shima's arms and legs with paralytic fangs, and threw her off of Anko for all they were worth. Shima cried out in surprise and pain as she was thrown threw the air by the surprisingly strong snakes, her extremities already numb. Not wasting a moment, Anko got out of the way of the wires, sending a small stream of fire to force Banjin to drop the wire of get burned.
Megami rushed to Shima and performed a small suiton jutsu that drew the venom out of the puncture wounds, while Anko took a few seconds to kick Banjin's butt. When the slightly more human sexist was groaning and unmoving, Anko turned her sights on the two girls. Megami said, in a voice that hinted at a contained rage, "Does that mean we pass, since you used snakes?" Anko chuckled sadistically, much more so than she had anytime previously, and said "No, because I keep those guys in seals on my upper forearms."
Megami got up, her shaking fists the only indication of her anger. "There was enough venom in those bites to stop her heart. You attacked a young kunoichi with the intent to kill." Anko shrugged, not really caring. She was through playing along to these kids and their tune. Now, they would see what the Vice Head of Torture could really do. Megami continued, her hair standing on end from her chakra levels surging "There are certain acts that are not allowed in most circumstances. Lethal force against a young girl while you're testing her skills is one of them."
Anko grinned and simply said "I do a lot of things I shouldn't." With that, Anko rushed forward, snakes sliding forward from her sleeves to grab hold of Megami and inject her with the potentially fatal venom. However, Megami was mad. Scratch that, she was blood-boiling, mouth-foaming, homicidal rage furious. This woman, for lack of a better word, had nearly killed Shima, just because she was about to lose. Didn't she say that she wanted the best as her students? They were about to take her down! But, she had retaliated and struck at Shima as if she were an enemy ninja.
If there was one thing Megami hated, it was murder attempts with no good reason behind them. She'd suffered through them for half her life, just because Yuusei happened to have been sealed into her instead of another baby. This was supposed to be a test to discover potential, not a true shinobi battle. Anko had crossed the line, so Megami crossed her own. In an instant that lasted an eternity, Megami glared at Anko and though only one thing. 'DIE!" she screamed in her head, before she released her weights entirely and embraced the demonic half of her chakra.
Anko's snakes were inches from Megami's face, before they were sliced to ribbons in a gust of cutting air that blew Anko back twenty paces. Anko looked up at Megami, and knew fear.
Megami's hair hovered around her head in a whipping halo of gold, as if it were caught in a great wind. Her eyes, moments ago clear sapphires, were now blazing amethysts with the slit pupil of a hunter. There was a near opaque curtain of wind surrounding her, acting like a cloak for this warrior goddess. Behind Megami's head, a lilac tail of pure chakra lashed around with a mind of its own, generating levels of bloodlust and battle-fury that Anko had not felt since the night of the Kyuubi. Her fingernails lengthened and hardened, turning into claws that could gouge rock, her canines lengthening into fangs that could rip through muscle and flesh like hot butter, her whisker marks lengthening and darkening, giving her a savage beauty.
Megami stared into Anko's eyes, an alien intelligence in those feral eyes. "Witness my power," she said in a voice that would coat hell in ten feet of ice, before she moved. Anko had seen fast. She'd watched as the Yondaime took down an army of two hundred Iwa-nin with the speed of light. She had gazed upon Konoha's Green Beast as he unleashed the Hachimon and took down all who got in his way with a peacock tail made of fire from the friction of the air passing his moving body. And she'd seen her sensei, Orochimaru, move with breathtaking grace and agility that made him seem to have no more substance than a ghost.
All of that? That was a toddler's first shaky steps. For Anko had never seen true speed until she'd seen Megami at her fullest. One instant she was thirty feet away, and in the same moment she was in front of her, her fist already pulled back for a punch. 'Hayai!' was all Anko could think, before she was suddenly flying through the air, stars in her eyes and a whiteout of pain radiating from her face. 'Genjuu!' she thought, nearly passing out from the sheer shock of the worst pain she had ever felt, surpassing even the burning of the Tenshin Juin while it had taken root in her neck.
Anko had no time to even think, before she was encased in a solid cocoon of wind, and was thrown faster than the speed of life at a boulder sticking out of the ground. She got a full-frontal introduction to the granite as she was flung into it. Things cracked. Not the granite. Anko's mouth blew open in a silent scream of pain, while she felt, for the first and maybe last time, the kiss of death trickling into the corners of her mind. Suddenly, she was held by arms that possessed the power of the devil himself, before she was flying through the air at speeds that tore her hair from its roots and blew her cheeks back in balloons of flesh.
She landed a full twelve gates away from where the battlefield had formed, bouncing and rolling from the leftover kinetic force, every millisecond a lifetime of pain. After she finally stopped and had a few seconds to take back her life from death's eager clutches, Anko looked up to Megami standing there, three steps away, her eyes now simmering instead of burning. "You can't die yet. I'm not done with you." The same second she said the last syllable was the second she held her palm to Anko's clammy forehead.
Anko gasped with what little air she had in her lungs as she felt Megami's energy pour into her, healing her and invigorating her. It was pure life, the rush of the hunt, the pleasure of the kill, the ecstasy of the mating, the comfort of the motherhood, and the calm silence of the dying days. Anko couldn't find the words to describe it; there were no words to describe the feel of Megami's raw, unrefined hybrid chakra filling her to the brim.
The high was soon over, and suddenly Anko was sore, unmarked, and at the feet of a still-raging goddess. Anko was brought up by nothing more than harsh air currents, before she was held by the same wind in a spread-eagle position. "Do you know how murderers were punished in the old days of Konoha?" Megami asked, her voice dripping with hunger for pain. "They were given twenty lashes, before they were made to fight the guardian of the one they killed to the death." Megami looked into Anko's eyes, still lost in her mindless anger at the lethal attack against her teammate, before she exposed all her teeth in a snarl of bloodlust. "You're about to know how that feels like, Anko-sensei."
Anko shivered in panicked, brain-stem, fight or flight fear. She had angered someone with the most power she had ever felt. She might not live to regret it. That was all she could process in her hazed mind, before she suddenly felt the burning sting of Stem ripping into her back. It was degrading, humiliating, and made her want to cry and beg for it end, but she kept her mouth shut. She didn't want to get Megami angry about anything. A geological epoch of pain later, she was freed by the wind to fall to the ground.
Anko whimpered in pain, but blocked it out with a wall of willpower and experience. She looked up at Megami, patiently waiting for her to stand up so she could kill her, and knew that there was only one way she could possibly survive. Wiping her thumb against one of her gushing cuts, she forced her hands into five seals and gathered every drop of chakra she could find in her pain-wracked yet reenergized body. "Kuchiyose no Jutsu," she whispered weakly, before touching her blood sacrifice to the ground.
Arcane symbols and sigils spread from her finger in a seal designed to tear the fabric between worlds, before she was sitting atop the head of the biggest snake she had ever summoned: Kimi, the daughter of Manda. Kimi was about half the size of her father, but even half was very impressive. The viper was known among snake contract users as being obedient and compliant, but seizing upon the first possible opportunity to gobble you up. At least she didn't demand sacrifices, as her sire did.
Kimi looked at her surroundings, before sensing who was currently lying on top of her head. "Anko-chan? Why have you summoned me here? I don't see any army or kage nearby." She then noticed the burning tempest of Megami's rampant chakra below her. "Ooh, this one's strong. Stronger than Orochi-kun, maybe. I'll settle for her." Moving with the speed of coiled lightning, the snake that was the size of a small hill lashed forward to swallow Megami, its tongue rushing forward to coil around her and suck her into jaws that could swallow a house.
Megami raised a hand, and a solid burst of wind threw Kimi to the side, having her jaws snap about an inch from the barbed fence encircling the Forest of Death. Without missing a beat, Kimi brought around her coils to crush Megami into paste. She jumped, flying as high as the tops of the epically tall trees of training ground 44, before she landed a football field away nearby her two fallen comrades.
Kimi crossed the distance in the blink of an eye, readying to hurl corrosive venom at her new toy, before Megami returned to normal in a flash, sagging slightly, and yelled up at Anko "We win, Anko-sensei!" Kimi paused, and Anko blinked. Twice. Then she started to convulse with laughter that threatened to pierce her lungs against her ribs, enough though Megami had healed them. Kimi looked up at her mistress in surprise while Anko continued to drown in hysterical mirth.
Finally, after everyone conscious had considered sending her to the loony bin, Anko subsided, still chuckling occasionally, but in control of herself. "Kimi, I'm sorry that I summoned you for this. I overreacted. You can go now." The giant viper, against all herpetological anatomy, pouted at having so short a break from her father's constant insanity, but conceded since Anko was once of the more favorite summoners she had ever had. Gently inclining her head to drop Anko to the ground, Kimi dispelled in a mass of smoke bigger than every cloud in the sky combined.
Anko looked at Megami strangely for a while, before asking "Was the batch of psychosis where you went nuclear phase six, or were you just improvising?" Megami remained silent while she tended to Shima's and Banjin's injuries with the same 'life-surge' she had used on Anko. Not twenty minutes ago she had deemed them unworthy, but battle has a way of bringing people together. When her new partners in battle were awake and unharmed, Megami admitted in a guilty tone "Sorry about that. I promised that I would only go all out when I was on the verge of death. I just overreacted to Shima getting hurt. I know what it feels like for someone to try and murder you for no good reason."
Anko winced. She knew all about the Kyuubi, especially after the Sandaime had revealed what a special case Megami was. The girl had revealed the whole thrall deal to the Sandaime when she was nine, trusting the man completely with her greatest of secrets. The guy naturally panicked when he heard that the Kyuubi aka Yuusei was getting out sometime in the near-future, but was reassured by Megami's total faith that the demon had changed and would behave himself. The old Sarutobi being as trusting as he was, he had revealed everything to Anko, in the hopes that two wrongfully judged souls would connect as teacher and student. It was a total violation of Megami's trust in the old man, but while peaceful he was still a ninja in politics. Anko now saw just how special this girl must be.
She'd faced her down and kicked her ass one-on-one, she'd convinced two radically people to work with her in a kick-ass plan, and she'd immediately reacted with lethal force when her comrade was threatened. These were all signs of someone who could one day become a Kage. Plus, the other two showed some real potential, even if they weren't aware of it themselves. Oh yeah, her team was going to kick some ass.
With her team now assembled, and her cuts healed by a now guilty Megami, Anko announced "Omedeto. You gaki show a lot of promise, and even though it was mostly Megami, you all worked together very well to do things I've never thought of before. I proudly declare this Team 4. Take tomorrow off to rest and hang out with your friends. You'll need the rest; the day after, I'm going to start training." Something about the way she said that last word made Shima, Banjin, and even Megami start worrying about what was to come.
It was later that night, and the jonin of Konohagakure interested in teaching were standing slightly cramped in the Hokage's office, announcing the results of there tests. The first five jonin all said something along the lines of "They failed, 'because they're pathetic." When it was Kakashi's turn, the porn addict of a copycat merely said "The Uchiha passed the bell test, and the others with him." Hiruzen frowned deeply at the man's blatant favoritism. He'd had his eye on Kakashi ever since Megami revealed that he'd been the one to deliver the death blow six years ago. The aged Sandaime had discovered that the man was clinically insane, prone to bouts of fanaticism and twisted worldview. He saw training the Uchiha boy as a chance to atone for failing his teammate Obito, and would literally give the boy anything he asked for to get the power to kill his brother.
The Uchiha boy himself was a cause for concern, showing signs of narcissism, schizophrenia, and a Cassandra complex. He had been raised from birth to believe that the Uchiha were superior to others, and looked down on the villagers and their near-obsession with him as if they were worms, even as he let the attention go to his head. The boy wouldn't listen to reason, and would stop at nothing to kill his brother, up to and including betrayal of the village, based off the psyche report Hiruzen had ordered made on him. Sasuke and Kakashi could be the worst mix for master and pupil imaginable, but Sarutobi couldn't do anything since on the surface they were a perfect match. Sometimes, he hated living in layers of shadow and mystique that the common man couldn't even fathom in his deepest nightmares.
The old Hokage merely sighed internally at Sakumo's son while taking another puff of his imported special blend of tobacco. He turned to the rookie among the elite, Yuuhi Kurenai, aka the Genjutsu Mistress and the Ice Queen. The woman stepped forward and delivered her report in a relaxed, yet still formal manner. "Team 8 consisting of Hyuuga Hinata, Inuzuka Kiba, and Aburame Shino passed my test of locating me while I cloaked myself with my best genjutsu. They worked admirably together, the Hyuuga's eyes and the Inuzuka's nose giving the Aburame a general area to send his Kikaichu out to search. They were finished in less than an hour, and show great potential for a tracking and capture team. Kiba has a few character flaws, and the Aburame isn't exactly verbose, but I believe that I can work that out. Hinata was the best of the lot, surprisingly."
Hiruzen nodded his consent, this time with a wide grin. It would have been obvious to any concerned observer the radical effect Megami had had on Hinata. The girl was more confident, less inhibited, and acted with all the calm efficiency of the best of her clan whilst remaining innocent. Innocence was such an easy thing to lose in this line of work, and that the heiress could excel at the job while retaining it was quite an accomplishment. He turned from the wrap-clothed maiden to look at his son and the last jonin in the room, Anko being surprisingly absent. Asuma, smoking a cigarette with the relish that seemed genetic in the Sarutobi line, stepped up to deliver his report.
"Team 10 consisting of the sons and daughter of the original Ino-Shika-Chou trio pass. I had them try and immobilize me beyond hope of escape within three hours, and after they agreed to work together, a brilliant strategy made by Nara Shikamaru had them completed in half the time. Yamanaka Ino used her Shintenshin no Jutsu to invade my mind, having me lay down while Akimichi Chouji sat on my face and ate bean-flavored potato chips before 'cutting loose'. I'm ashamed to say that I actually passed out, and when I woke up they had kunai at my throat, heart, and third leg. Naturally, I couldn't risk any of the three injuries, and passed them on the spot. They'll make a great information-gathering team." A few men chuckled, while Hiruzen shook his head at his son's lackadaisical nature.
The Sandaime waited a few seconds for anyone else to make a comment, before saying "Very well, if that is everyone—" He was interrupted by one of his glass windows imploding, while a shadowy figure threw itself in through the gap. Kakashi looked up from his book, his version of screaming in surprise, while all the other jonin grabbed kunai and prepared for combat. Hiruzen sighed and said very annoyed "Anko, I've warned you about this. If you break my window, you have to pay for it." The figure now revealed as Anko, swallowed an entire skewer of dango with a giant gulp and reached for another from the box under her arm
"When I'm a Jonin, then I'll be able to afford being this dramatic. Until then, just take it out of my next paycheck. I can always work the bars for chump change." Sarutobi winced at the much younger woman's casual talk of seducing men out of their wallets (and pants), before taking out a form from his desk to charge to replacement of the window directly to the bank account of Mitarashi Anko.
Kakashi, seeing there was no immediate danger, went back to reading his x-rated book and asked "So why you late? So ashamed that you failed the only team you'll ever get that you didn't want to show up?" Everyone in the room glared at the man for his rudeness, while Anko merely yawned (which did interesting things to her chest) and bit off another sweet dumpling from the skewer in her hand.
"Actually, my brats tired me out so much that I had to take a nap. And when I woke up, I was starving so I had to grab some dango on the way. By the way, they passed." So saying, the snake woman swallowed another ball of sweetness off the wooden skewer she was holding, subconsciously using seductive tongue movements that made every straight, potent male's pants tighten a few sizes. Ergo, the Sandaime didn't have to blood to spare and the Hatake was too busy wondering if Jiraiya might ever make yaoi Icha Icha to notice. Said homo scarecrow remarked "You're so weak that a few snot-nosed academy graduates wore you out? No wonder you were demoted."
Anko, who really wasn't in the mood, threw her empty skewer straight at something even gay men treasure. Kakashi side-stepped, not even looking up. Seeking to prevent potential bloodshed, or castration, Hiruzen asked Anko "May I have a more official report, Anko? How did they pass?" Anko acted serious for a moment, standing at attention to show her respect for one of the few human beings in the village. "Team 4 consisting of Raikou Shima, Isagiyoi Banjin, and Megami passed with flying colors. Megami displayed impressive leadership skills, bringing a sexist Banjin and unwilling Shima around to her way of thinking, which is quite devious I might add. They implemented a plan that consisted of Megami, whom displayed Jonin-level speed, providing distraction and main assault while Shima tired me out and provided back-up while Banjin prepared for the final move. They repeated this method several times, Megami's monstrous skills sharpened by Shima's ingenuity and Banjin's skills at entrapment and capture. My test was to have them force me to use the Kuchiyose no Jutsu, and I'm proud to say that they drove me to summoning Kimi, the largest summon that I can manage. They have great potential for a frontal assault team; these are the kinds of kids who cut down obstacles instead of moving around them."
A few murmurs went through the room. As of yet, the Sandaime had managed to keep under wraps Megami's true identity, having spread the lie of her having kept the cover of a male to avoid her abusive parents. Therefore, it was a shock to hear how a no-name civilian had Jonin-level speed. Kakashi, always one to be condescending, asked "Are you sure you aren't exaggerating to make yourself seem less weak?" Anko smirked, shrugged her shoulders, and said with a full mouth "She knows Gai's secret. That's all I'm gonna say."
That sent even more mutters around. Could this girl really have discovered the power of the Hachimon? Hiruzen cleared his throat, and the room was silenced. "That's all then. Teams 4, 7, 8, and 10 are now officially listed as ninja cells of Konoha. I bid good luck to the teachers with their students. Now, leave." There was a general assent, and the room was empty. Sarutobi grinned and said "I love being able to do that."
Megami woke up, and just took a while to enjoy the comfort of a warm bed, deciding that breakfast could wait a little while. She very rarely got a day off, what with her slave-driver of a thrallmate. 'I heard that.' Yuusei said, and Megami merely chuckled before going back to her little bout of laziness. 'You know that your sensei knows about you, don't you? The old man must have told her about us.' 'Doesn't matter. The old geezer has to do what he thinks is best, and it 'll probably help having someone to talk to about all the hanyou and seal-collapsing stuff. I'll wait off on Shima and Banjin. I don't want them avoiding me like the plague from day one. Maybe after I've managed to cure them both of their respective diseases.'
Yuusei chuckled with his thunderous baritone, and remarked that 'Sexism and being a fangirl hardly qualify as diseases. Still, if you manage that, I'll show you how to mix you Fuuton and Suiton to make ice.' Megami grinned at that, loving any new piece of information, especially if it was about jutsu, and decided that it was time to get up. She stepped out of her bed, shook out her hair, and started combing it with chakra-laden fingers while she got into her clothes. Her sleepwear consisted of a black silk chiffon nightgown, very breathable yet consequently highly translucent. Not that she minded her body, but she didn't like the idea of any guests she might have being able to see her chest in its budding glory.
She slipped out of the black, lacy thing, stepping into her black panties and red sports bra. As she put on her fish-net undershirt and started wrapping her calves in armored bandages, she considered what to do with the day. As she put on her shorts and leather tank-top, she decided that she would spend the day bonding with her teammates. And don't they say 'no time like the present'? Megami formed two Kage Bunshin with an errant thought and gentle release of fifty units, which was now a relatively tiny amount of her boundless reserves. The two knew their mission, and left without a word.
Megami set about making breakfast, deciding to follow the classic western breakfast that Kyuubi remembered from one of the more interesting eras of mankind. She set eggs with cheese, sausages, and bacon to fry while she started to whip up a batter with eggs, flour, milk with a dash of cream, a pinch of sugar and salt apiece, and a few chocolate chips for relish. As she did this personally, her usual Kage Bunshin assistant started dipping thick slices of bread in buttermilk and cinnamon before laying them on the griddle, while setting some juicy slabs of ham to roast in the oven and cutting a few potatoes in thin strips and throwing them in the pan with some oil.
By the time that Banjin and Shima arrived, dragged by the feet by Megami's clones, the dining table was set with a buffet of down-home breakfast foods, with cheesy eggs, sausage links, crispy bacon, succulent ham, hash browns, French toast, and pancakes with butter all laid out in an array that set the two young genin and their salivary glands racing. However, Banjin, like most people, didn't react well to having a very good dream being interrupted to be bodily dragged in his pajamas across town by a solid Bunshin of his new teammate.
"What the hell is going on? Why did you drag me here?" he asked, trying not to notice how his empty stomach was screaming at him to get down on his knees and beg for this pretty girl to feed him some of her delicious-looking food. Megami frowned slightly and said back "I have a name, you know? It's Megami, as in goddess. I'm not just 'girl' or 'chick', okay? And you might consider calling Shima by her name too, or I might just have my Kage Bunshin hold you down while Shima and I eat every crumb of this food." Banjin blanched as his stomach rolled over and played dead, now desperate for some nourishment.
Shima, enjoying watching Banjin squirm in some dark part of her mind, interceded on his behalf. "I don't think I could eat all that food with all your guys' help, let alone just with you." Banjin involuntarily threw her a grateful glance, before remembering that she was a girl, albeit one that he could stand. Megami shrugged and said "Anyway, I think that we should spend the day working on team bonding, and every good day starts with breakfast. Please, dig in."
While Banjin and Shima ravenously ate the incomparable food made by Megami's hand, the blonde asked little innocuous questions about their lives. She found out that Shima was an only child, her parents ran a small yet successful steakhouse not too far from Ichiraku's, her idol was the Yondaime Hokage, and she had the disturbing habit of drawing what her and Sasuke's child would look like at various ages. Banjin, however, was a bit more interesting. He had his brother, who was about to tie the knot with one of the receptionist Chunin at the Hokage Tower, and three uncles whom each had more kids than they could frankly afford with their civilian wives, yet they all got by. His dad had never remarried, but said that he was content with having two such fine sons. Banjin's idea of a good day off was talking with his family at breakfast, training with one or two of his uncles until noon, working off a big lunch with his various cousins and their games, before ending the day with one of his dad's lectures on Shinobi history, which were supposedly much more interesting than Iruka's.
When the dishes had been scraped clean by eager tongues, Megami clapped her hands to catch her food-coma-experiencing teammates' attention. "Well, that was a nice start, but we should really get out and talk more, maybe do some light training to work this all off. Shima, you'll find your usual attire in my bathroom. Banjin, your clothes are under you chair."
The two looked surprised, before discovering that her words were true, her Kage Bunshin somehow managing to sneak not only into their homes, but right behind them without them noticing. It was the mutual feeling that being around Megami would teach them to keep on their toes. Shima closed the bathroom door to afford some privacy, but Banjin found himself in the awkward position of Megami starring intently at him as he started to take off his t-shirt. "Um, I've gotta change." Megami nodded, but didn't look away. "Could you maybe look away, please?" Megami shook her head, and Banjin started to get a little red. "Why?" he asked, suddenly wondering if he was stuck on a team with two hot babes who didn't know the meaning of modesty.
Megami spoke, in a voice that was not amused. "I've been studying biology for a few years, but there's only so much I can learn about the male body by looking at diagrams and graphs. I need something to perform a compare and contrast to, and you're the only guy I'm likely to see naked without me having to sneak into the male onsen. You really only have three choices. You could change now, change with Shima in the room, or walk around in your sleepwear all day. If it helps, I'm not the least bit attracted to you. I just need an example to use should I need to Henge into a male for an infiltration mission."
Banjin was red as a tomato, but if he knew one thing about Megami in the short time he'd known her, it was that she was stubborn as a young bull. Turning his back to her in an effort to preserve some modesty, he realized that he was surrounded by Kage Bunshin, all with the same businesslike intensity the original had. "Multiple angles," was the only explanation Megami gave him.
Banjin sighed in utter embarrassment, before reluctantly taking off his shirt. There was no change in any of the clones' expressions, except maybe an increase in attentiveness. Figuring that he might as well get it over with, Banjin closed his eyes and stepped out of his boxers. Megami and her clones started noting all the facts and logging them away, not even the hint of a blush or a leer coating her face. In her mind, this was just a new source of information. Besides, you never knew when a detailed knowledge of a naked male might come in handy. Say she needed to sneak into a male onsen to gather information, or sleep with a straight woman to assassinate her. Megami's eyes tracked over the smooth muscles, tanned skin, the growth of pubic hair and the minute details of Banjin's manhood, and felt nothing.
This fact might have soothed Banjin's humiliation, but all he knew was that he was naked and surrounded by a girl and her clones, all of them looking at him. It was embarrassing to the extreme, yet he could not stop his mind from trailing down the paths that included all the girls around him naked, despite his best efforts. Puberty, it's a bitch. Megami noted the changes in the sex organ, and logged it away as more information. In quick, terse movements, Banjin got dressed in his t-shirt, shorts, and sandals. "There, now was that so bad?" Banjin didn't answer, only trying to lock the memory away in the darkest corners of his mind.
Shima came out of the bathroom, blissfully unaware of what had just happened, and the trio walked out of the apartment to face a day to bonding, befriending, and generally learning more about each other. Oh, boy.
Reviews are like water in a parched dessert for me. Please, I beg of you, review. Oh, and petition Artful Lounger to update Kage no Naruto for me. Please? Thank you! Ja ne, my readers!
Yougan Waia: lit. Lava wire, an original technique by Banjin. By channeling fire chakra through his wires, he can cut and cauterize most substances with his razor-sharp wire.
P.S. All non-numbered jutsu can be found at the ninjutsu section of .