The Hyrulian Valhalla Saga
By Queenie Z
Twilight Is A Dirty Hippie
Twilight laid down on the grass of the great big field of the afterlife, a field that was always lush and green and never had bad weather. All was quiet and peaceful, save for the bubbly giggles of the Hero and the mewing of the cat he was playing with. He was also wearing nothing but his signature hat and a bright red blush on his cheeks.
He held the orange tabby above him and grinned. "Aww," he said between bouts of laughter, "who's a good kitty? You're a good kitty. I think I'll call you Midna. You remind me of Midna. Eheheh."
"Meow!" cried the cat happily in response.
What Twilight didn't notice, however, was the familiar face frowning at him from above. It was the Hero of Time, Twilight's predecessor and teacher in life - although his form looked far less skeletal here in the afterlife.
"Twilight," he muttered, "what the hell are you doing?"
Twilight lowered his furry friend and grinned. "Hi," he said, "I'm just playing with my friend Midna. Say hi, Midna!"
"You're drunk. Where are your clothes?"
The inebriated Hero snorted. "Clothes are for chumps. Everyone knows they keep you from being one with nature."
Time raised his eyebrows. "Being one with… wait, what?"
"Nature, Time! Nature!" Twilight stood, the cat in one hand the the other on his hip. "Haven't you ever felt the spring breeze or the cool grass on your skin? I bet you haven't!"
Time's eye twitched. "Just - just put your clothes back on before you do something stupid, Twilight!"
"No way!" Twilight shook his head. "This is the afterlife, Time! It's not like I ever got to do this when I was alive!" He turned to the cat. "Come on, Midna! Let's go experience nature together!"
"Mew!"
With that, Twilight turned and ran off, giggling all the way and leaving Time to just stare, bewildered and a little annoyed. He sighed and put a hand to his forehead.
"Taught him everything he knows, huh…"