Goodbye to Sunshine

Summary: He wasn't always a monster.

All things truly wicked start from innocence~Ernest Hemingway

1958 {Age 5-6}

"Alex, darling, it's time to go"

"But maaaamaaa! I don't want to go to her stupid party!"

"Well why not?" His mother was on her knees, buttoning up his jacket and using her handkerchief to wipe away dirt from his nose. Fussing in a way that only a mother can fuss over her child; the little boy's brows are knitted, a frown tugging at his face because, really, it should be obvious. Young Alex doesn't want to go to Sophie's stupid birthday party because; "Because she's a girl, mama!"

"You don't like girls?"

"They're gross, they have cooties…Dim said so!"

"Ah, but I'm a girl. Don't you like me, darling?"

"I love you mama! You're not a girl, not really"

His mother laughed, knowing he was too young to realize he was contradicting himself. But this was not a war to be won for Alexander Burgess and within the hour was sitting at a pink table (gross!) surrounded by other girls and boys. The only good thing was the cake, but wait…something happened. Sophie smiled at him and he felt all warm. Alex realized it must have been a side effect of the cootie epidemic, currenly plaguing the nation of kindergarten.

"Hi Alex" She said, smiling and he could see a gap there were the tooth had fallen out. She'd been wiggling it with her tongue this past week and everyone (including Alex) kept asking her to do it. Now it had fallen out, "Did the tooth fairy come?" he asked, quite forgetting that she was disease ridden and gross (because she was a girl) "Uh-Huh, she brought me two quarters!" the two children went on to discuss their amazement at such generosity and she invited him to look at her books. So they went up to her room.

By the time they were going home, Alex figured that maybe girls weren't so horrible. At least not Sophie, in fact she was kind've cool. She liked dragons like he did, and her favorite color was blue like his! She had soft hair and a nice sounding voice, so they decided to marry each other. He didn't really know how to go about it so he simply asked her, "We should get married, because…we like each other and our favorite color is the same. So, do you want to be married?" and Sophie had said yes.

Their wedding was splendid. She wore a grape-juice stained white Easter dress and he wore his school uniform, their wedding guests were his and her plush toys and animals. Their rings were those twisty-ties found on bread packages. Instead of kissing, which was really icky, they shook hands.

1971 {Age 17-18}

Alex slammed his cane with vicious and brute strength down onto the man's knuckles as Pete and Georgie held onto him, Dim laughing away nearby. The man screamed as the force of the blows caused the skin on his knuckles to literally split apart, and Alex kept on slamming his weapon down until the man's hands were swelling rapidly and he was pissing himself from terror and physical agony. "How disgusting. Do you viddy this my brothers? He's gone and soiled himself!" he sneered meanly, taking a few more swings before switching to the man's face.

Growing tired of him, Alex snapped his fingers and Georgie pushed him into the waters. He would live. The foursome ventured back to his car, and about three miles of driving later came across a young devotchka all crying because she'd just been dumped by her beloved beau. She was thirteen years old, his droogs watched as Alex comforted her like a true gentleman would, only to lure her behind an abandoned building and rape her. When a sharp whistle came, the other boys knew it was their turn.

Yes, the night was full of girls bleeding between their shaking legs, all bruised and crying in pain and for him to stop. And there were men groaning as his boot smashed their noses and shattered their teeth. One of them was wearing a light blue shirt, and something flashed across his mind—briefly, oh so very briefly.

"What's your favorite color?"

"Blue"

"You can't like that color, it's mine"

"Yes I can!"

"Nuh-Uh, it's a boy color!"

"MOMMMMY! ALEX SAYS I CAN'T LIKE BLUE!"

There is not time to dwell on this memory, the police are coming. They let go of the three young boys, each of who lipped off at Uncle Alex so it was only proper he teach them their manners; yes? And as usual, they get away—not before Alex breaks one of the boy's fingers for good measure.

Later, slooshying to his beloved Ludwig Van…her face, plump and sweet framed by wild brunette curls decorated by dry leaves from their playing in the leaf piles happily, flashed behind his closed glazzies. Sophie.

But her face was suffocated out by images of people bleeding, screaming, begging him for mercy and that innocence and sweetness was forgotten. So much so, that it might as well have never existed.

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