Going to try to bust out chapters every couple of days or so but you know how it is and life gets in the way.
Judes Pov
Walking through the front doors of the house the first thing I hear is.
"We need details now!," Lena spoke from the living room sitting next to Stef.
"First off I'd like to say we don't appreciate you just taking off like that," Stef used her disciplinary voice if only for a second.
"Yeah I know I'm sorry,"
"It's okay sweetie just wait for us to at least reply;to you before you run out the house," I knew they wanted to get through the proper parenting speech's as quick as possible so they could start gushing about the gossip.
"Okay love, so whats this about Connor showing up? Your old best friend Connor,"
"And did you say he kissed you?," Lena had to add in that last bit.
I hadn't even had the chance to properly access all thats happened tonight let alone be prepared to talk about it.
"Yeah that Connor was the one at the door earlier and yes he kissed me," Wasn't really going into detail at this point just confirming their speculations.
"Thats what we thought you said, so what happened after you left? Did you go find him?," Forgot how much momma Lena was into gossip she sounded like a schoolgirl sometimes. I guess it comes with working at a school.
"Give him a second to respond Lena," Stef always the proper mediator.
"Yeah I found him he was near the beach at the school," I proceeded to inform them in a rough summary on all Connor and I had discussed to an extent.
"I'm sorry to hear that he has had such a rough time, personally think he should inform the proper authorities about his father, and blackmail wasn't the best way to approach the situation. But I am proud of him for sticking up for himself against his father," Stefs inner cop always seemed to pop its little head out but im glad she was just stating her opinion on the matter and not demand Connor take action.
"Yeah it was hard for me to hear. I knew his dad was messed up but I didn't ever think it was that bad,"
"So what about him kissing you? Did you tell him about Taylor?," Momma Lena hitting straight to the gut with that one.
"I told him about Taylor, and I think we're choosing to ignore it at this point. I wanna work on reestablishing our friendship with out complicating things too much,"
"Well I think he's already complicated things. We've never really talked about it, or wanted to push you to identify your sexuality in any way. But I do remember you voicing your feelings to me about Connor when you were younger," Momma Lena hitting the nail on the head.
"You're right I did like Connor as more than a friend when I was 13, but we never really got the chance to see how that played out. I don't know what my sexuality is i've never really thought about it too much what I do know is that I love Taylor and she's always been there for me," I responded honestly to the best of my ability.
"Were not trying to push you towards anything, love. We just wanted to see where your head was about all this. I'm glad to hear that you want to pursue a friendship with Connor again I'm sure he could really use a friend right now," Love Stef she always knows exactly what to say.
"Also we would like you to invite Connor to dinner tomorrow, you're not the only one who's missed him," Lena was quick to add on.
"Okay, I'll text him about it tomorrow. Is it okay if i went to lay down i'm tired,"
"Thats fine honey, Love you get some sleep,"
Great, I don't mind having Connor over for dinner tomorrow I just wasn't expecting to have to see him again so soon. I flopped on to my bed the moment I walked into my room. I was mentally exhausted so much to think about, so much to process. I loved Taylor, but Connor he has this hold on me that I don't really know how to explain. What am i supposed to do?
Next day
Taylor 3 - Hey Monkey, I know you're heading over meet me at the little park in 10 okay?
Me - Yeah I'll be there in 8
I was heading over to see Taylor this morning to talk to her. The little park was this park in her neighborhood that we've been going to play or talk since we became friends. In a way it was our spot. Our spot? Hmm seems like I have a spot with everyone.
I didn't know exactly what I was going to tell her and I didn't know exactly what I wasn't going to tell her as well. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place.
I've always been honest with Taylor we've never kept anything from her, but at the same time i've never really had to before she has always known every aspect of my life.
But at the same time, do I really have a right to tell her about Connor? I mean his feeling were his own that he shared with me and me alone. And i'm assuming that he didn't want anybody else to know about those feelings, who was I to tell somebody his secrets.
I pulled into the neighborhood and stopped on the street next to the park. I didn't know exactly what I was going to say, but I had to tell her something.
Taylor was leaning against the picnic table wearing one of those low cut tank tops that hung down slightly past her waist line, and some really short jean shorts. Her pink highlights in her hair ( the color of the week) stood out against her natural blonde hair in this august sun. I've always thought Taylor was beautiful in a natural kind of way. She went from cute in middle school to one of the hottest girls at our school over the summer leading into high school. She had the ability to be whatever she wanted with her beauty but she just chose to be herself the tomboy who didn't really care for makeup or what other people thought about her. One of the qualities I found most endearing about her.
"Hey monkey, took you long enough," Taylor spoke as she started walking my way to greet me.
"Hey monkey, Had trouble sleeping last night so i kinda slept in," I responded as i leaned in to give her a quick kiss. It was our natural greeting but this time was different in a way. The feeling of her lips against mine felt normal, familiar, comfortable in a way. But there wasn't a spark or fireworks like there was with Connor.
"So are you ready for the surprise?," She asked gleaming with a mischievous look on her face.
"Yeah whats up?," I asked laughing as she was getting excited.
"Look what I got done yesterday," Taylor lifted up the front of her tank top to reveal a belly button piercing.
"Do your Aunt and Uncle know about this?," I asked already knowing the answer.
"Nope Alexis's older sister does piercings professionally and did it for me. Do you like it," She responded with an evil smirk.
"Yeah I like it, but if they find out they will kill you," Laughing as i took a second look at it, nudging the dangling ornament with my index finger.
"This is why their not going to find out, you think its sexy boy scout," Taylor moved in draping her arms around me as i leaned on to the edge of the table.
"You always look sexy, and you do know I was never actually in the boy scout thing so that nickname is invalid," out of instinct and habit i had my hands on her waist pulling her in.
"shut up dork,"
We start kissing and it was good there was nothing wrong with our make out session. It was like its always been nothing weird or out of the normal. but i guess that might really be the issue.
It was so normal.
After about two or three minutes we separated. I gave her a flashing smile of acceptance and looked away slightly distracted i couldn't keep Connor off my mind and i couldn't keep comparing the two which was something i shouldn't being doing what so ever.
"So what came up last night that was so important that I couldn't come over?," Knew this question was coming and I didn't really want to have to answer it either. But i was going to play it cool anyway, I couldn't have her realizing how much last night was bothering me.
"You will never guess who showed up at my house last night," I responded playfully keeping her guessing was a good way to keep her distracted as I gathered my thoughts.
"Hmm, well this person has to be important enough for you to blow me off so lets go with Adam Levine," She said with a laugh.
"Oh my god, how did you guess!,"
"What really," She spoke with her mouth hanging wide open.
"No Dork, First off I didn't blow you off, and Second your obsession with Maroon Five can be slightly terrifying at moments," Taylor punched me in the arm as i was laughing at her.
"Jude come on tell me already," She pleaded pulling on my arm as I started walking towards the swing set.
"It was Connor Taylor, it was Connor," I looked over at her with a serious expression before looking down as I started to take off swinging.
"Connor as in your Connor?," she was shocked and I could feel her trying to lock eyes with me.
"He's not my Connor, but yea that Connor," I kept looking forward as i swung only occasionally looking over at her. I wanted to play it off like it was nothing but that wasn't exactly working for me.
"Oh wow we haven't heard from since," Taylor couldn't finish her sentence. I knew this was going to be a touchy subject for her. We haven't really talked about her dad that much over the last year. After the accident Taylor's dad went to prison for assault with a deadly weapon against a minor. We all know it was an accident but her dad was still drunk when it happened and Taylor never forgave him.
"Yeah I know," I spoke softly looking back at her to see if she was okay.
"Well is he okay? Hows he doing? Why is he back?," She asked trying to sound excited and optimistic. If anybody was better at hiding their feeling better than I was it was Taylor.
"Yeah he's doing good, and a situation happened with his dad so he's back to live with his Aunt who just moved back to town,"
"How are you doing with it, I bet it had to be a shock him coming home," Taylor always knew how to ask the right questions to get something out of me thats for sure. But I decided I wasn't going to tell her about the kiss. At least not yet, not until I fully understood how I felt about it.
"I'm fine, it was weird at first and definitely shocking him just showing up like that. But after talking for a minute it was like I had my best friend back and i'm really glad hes home," I was honest with her and wasn't lying i just wasn't telling her the whole truth.
"Thats good Im happy for you, babe," She paused for a moment looking down herself I knew there was something else she wanted to ask me.
"Does he hate me?,"
"Why would he hate you? Its not like it was your fault,"
"Well it was my plan to go into the house, and it was my dad that shot him,"
"I don't think he blames you for what happened, none of us have ever blamed you for what happened,"
"I know I just want to get the chance to apologize to him i guess,"
"Well if that what you want babe, im sure you will get plenty of chances, but remember that night was not your fault we all wanted to hangout more and have some fun,"
"I know, I know. I love you monkey you know that right?," It felt like their was more to that last sentence. but I might have just been looking into it a little too far.
"I know babe, I love you too monkey," By this time we had both quit swinging and i leaned over to give her a reassuring kiss.
"So when are you going to see him again? Next time you do tell him I would like that chance to talk to him and see him," Taylor asked trying lighten up the mood a little. she hated awkward silences more than anything.
"Oh crap Mom's wanted me to invite him to dinner tonight, thanks for reminding me," I had completely forgotten reaching in my phone to text him.
Connors Pov
I walked down the stairs groggy scratching my head, The clock read 1:20 pm. Damn I slept in late.
"About time you got up lazy," Aunt Kathy spoke from the kitchen as she was pouring lemonade into a glass.
"Sorry I didn't sleep well last night," I replied rubbing my eyes yawning.
"It's fine sweetie first night in a new place is always a hard one, you deserve the chance to sleep in, you want some?," she asked lifting the jug of lemonade.
"Yes please,"
I sat down at the bar and waited for her to fix my drink.
"So did you go see that boy last night? What was his name Jude?," Aunt Cathy asked subtly trying to start up a conversation. I loved my Aunt Cathy she has always been easy to talk to, The only person in my family I could freely talk to about anything. Aunt Cathy was an interesting woman, She was a hard ass defense attorney at work but in her home life she was kind of a hippy all about free love and all that spirit mumbo jumbo. I didn't really understand it a lot of it most of the time but i loved her for who she was regardless. Shes in her early 30s and has never been married. I asked her about that one time and she just told me she doesn't understand the point of being tied down to one person for the rest of your life.
"Yeah I went to go see Jude," My reply was short I didn't really want to talk about it that much due to the fact that last night hadn't exactly gone the way I had planned it.
"Well how did it go? don't just leave me hanging,"
"Well I went to go see him and instead of saying hi how you doing, first he opens the door and i kissed them then I proceeded to run off," Yep last night didn't go as planned whats so ever. Aunt Cathy instantly busted out laughing.
"Thats one hell of a greeting if you ask me," She continued laughing for a moment while I gave her the death glare.
"Did he kiss you back?," Wasn't exactly prepared for that one but thinking back onto it he did. Jude did kiss me back and it was amazing the greatest kiss of my young life.
"Yeah he did actually, but it doesn't matter cause he has a girlfriend," Even though he had kissed me back, even though it was amazing, truth is he still has a girlfriend that he cares about dearly.
"Hmmm you say he has a girlfriend, which implies that he is straight, but normally a straight guy wouldn't kiss you back if he wasn't interested in you," Well isn't she good at questioning everything like she was in a court room.
"That's true I guess," Still wasn't to sure where she was getting at exactly but was open to hearing out her possible case.
"Well what happened after that?,"
I proceeded to tell her about Jude finding me at the beach, everything we discussed, and even the almost second kiss we almost shared.
"If you ask me I don't think you're as much out of the race as you think, even if he has a girlfriend," My head popped up as soon as she said the words.
"What do you mean? You think I should try an break up Taylor and him?," The idea of him and Taylor breaking up sounded good, but I didn't want it to be my fault. I don't want to be responsible for any sadness Jude could go through. Not again at least. All I want is for Jude to be happy.
"I didn't mean it to come out like that, I am in no way condoning being a homewrecker, even though i've been called that a couple of times. Never mind that, I'm just saying let him know exactly how you feel and see if he feels the same way too. There is nothing wrong about fighting for what's in your heart sweetie," She spoke softly and she put her hand over mine.
She's right there's now way what i'm feeling can be completely one sided. I have felt this way about Jude since the day I met him. I didn't exactly know what it meant at the time but I do now. I didn't fight for him when I was younger because I was too scared of what my father or other people might think about my feeling for him. That changes now.
"I think you're right Aunt Cathy, I'm not going to fight for Jude trying to break up his relationship with Taylor, but I am going to fight for him all the same,"
ding ding
Now who could that be? I reached into my pocket to pull out my phone to see his name pop up and my heart skip a beat.
Jude - Hey Connor?
Me- Yea, whats up?
I wanted to be nonchalant in my text but in the real world I was freaking out, and couldn't hide my smile to save a life.
"What's got you smiling like that for," Aunt Cathy asked arching a eyebrow with a sly smirk.
" Jude just text'd me," Yep still couldn't wipe off the smile I was beaming.
Jude - My mom's wanted to know if you would come over and have dinner with us tonight?
"His moms want me to come over for dinner tonight, I haven't seen them in forever is it okay if I go?," I was jumping at the chance to see Jude again so soon.
"Yea thats fine with me I'm going to be working late on a case tonight anyway,"
"Thank you!," I was literally ecstatic right now and this gave me my first chance to show Jude exactly how i feel.
Me - My Aunt said it's cool, what time should I come over?
Jude - Well dinners at 6 so around that time.
Me - Okay cool Im so excited!
Jude - Why? lol its just my moms everyone else has already left for school.
Me - So I love your mom's 3333
Jude - Hahahaha they love you too, they got really excited when I told them you were home. they are really happy your home.
Me - Cant wait to see them, and hopefully they aren't the only ones that are happy I'm home
Jude - there not, I'll see you at dinner Connor
Me - Wouldn't miss it for the world.
My heart was racing every second just waiting for his next text. I couldn't believe I was getting to see him so soon again. Now it was time to figure out a game plan for tonight. I had a weird feeling I had to make tonight count.
Jude pov
I've spent the last three hours practically staring at the last message Connor texted me which I didn't even reply to. Wouldn't miss it for the world. What was he thinking sending that to me? Why was I so bothered by it? Why did my heart start racing every time I looked at it? This was beginning to become a problem no matter how long I've spent wracking my brain on how i feel about Connor and what happened last night, I've come up with nothing. I cant put to words how I feel or what they mean and i'm doing even worse of a job figuring out what i want to do about Connor till I figure it out.
"Jude, quit staring at your phone for five minutes and help me set the table before Conner gets here," Stef demanded as she walked into the kitchen.
"Yes ma'am," I replied as I put away my phone and headed to the kitchen to grab the tableware. After a couple of minutes of basic conversations and mom's talking about how excited they were to see Connor and bickering on how he possibly has grown over the past two years. Stef had a bet that his height has probably topped out after middle school an that I was taller, while Lena made her bet that he was most likely 6'5 by now. Both were wrong but I wasn't fixing to spoil their fun.
Ding Dong
Hearing the sound of the doorbell almost gave me a heart attack and I was this close to dropping a plate. "Go answer the door it's most likely Connor," Lena shouted from the kitchen as she was finishing the last touches on dinner.
I walked over to the door slowly with anticipation, I still wasn't sure how I felt about seeing Connor again so soon but i guess it was now or never. Opening the door Connor flashed me his 100 watt smile as soon as he saw me.
"Hope you're hungry, moms made her special fajita tacos," Basic conversation good job Jude good job.
"Wow that takes me back, I haven't had your mom's fajita tacos in so long," Connor walked in and pulled me in for a quick hug. for normal people this was a normal greeting in a way. For us though it was more just one single touch from Connor could send shocks through out my whole body, and why did he have to smell so good what was he wearing.
After separating I made a quick escape to the dining room to let my moms have at him for a minute.
"Oh my Lord Connor its so good to see you, love how have you been," Stef pulled him in first as lena made her way out of the kitchen into the dining room. I forgot how much my moms truly loved Connor. Connor wasn't just my best friend that came over a lot he was a part of the family.
"I've been better and i've been worse i'm just glad i'm home and i've missed you both so much," Connor spoke politely as he hugged Stef back.
"Well you've certainly gotten tall, hasn't he Stef. What are they feeding you," Lena sent a smirk Stefs way as she pulled Connor in for a big momma bear hug.
"I had a really big growth spurt this past summer," Connor laughed as we all started moving to our seats. Connor sat next to me at his old seat. Where he always used to sit when he came over.
It was quiet as we all started fixing our plates other than "can you pass that here," "hey can you hand me that," I was starting to get nervous when every so often Connors knee would rub up against mine as he moved which caught me holding and catching my breath every time.
"So Connor, Jude told me a little bit about what's been going on with you, and let you keep this noted I believe you should have contacted the police when it came to your father," Stef started before getting cut off.
"But we are extremely proud of you for sticking up to your father and taking charge of your life," Lena added the last part to be supportive. I had no clue they were going to bring this up. I looked over at Connor apologetically.
"So I see you still tell your Moms everything," Connor looked at me with a smirk and piercing gaze.
"Im sorr-"
"No it's fine, I like that I was only mad when we were younger because I couldn't talk to my Dad as freely as you could your moms, Thank you both and I know Stef it wasn't probably the best way to approach the situation but at the time all I was really thinking how was I going to get away without my dad having to go to jail," Connor spoke with strength about the situation a lot differently than he had last night.
"But you do realize that what he did was wrong right, and he should be held accountable," Stef looked at him more serious than I had seen her in a while.
"Yes mam," Connor replied softly.
" No matter how it happened were just glad you're safe and back in our lives again," Lena added with a sympathetic look.
Stef lifted her glass of wine and we followed suit. "Here's to Connor being home and safe we are so happy to have you as a part of the family once again,"
Connors eyes started tearing up a little as we all said cheers, It always confused me to think about how somebody could be so happy for just a moment that they would start crying. But it was happening and I couldn't help but smile with everyone else.
"you've always been a part of the family," I spoke quietly to Connor as I leaned over and nudged him with my shoulder.
Over the rest of the dinner it was the most talking this table has seen in weeks. Moms going back and forth asking questions about Connors life and how it was living in Nevada and what not. Stories from way back when were brought back to life and had everybody laughing the whole time. It was a good dinner it was like any other dinner we had ever had together I don't even know why I was so worried.
"So Connor you rejoining the baseball team this year? You know Judes trying to make varsity this year even though he's only a sophomore," Stef started up in between bites.
"Sadly no since the accident I haven't been able to throw as well as before," Connor responded like it was nothing.
"Oh im sorry to hear that sweetie," Lena responded.
"It's okay just cause I can't throw that well doesn't mean I can't catch. I started playing football a lot more seriously afterwards and found out I make a really good running back," Connor replied quickly and proudly.
"Oh thats good to hear, Do you have any other new hobbies we should be aware of?,"
"Actually Connors become a really talented musician," The words kind of just sprung from my mouth. Connor gave me this look that said "why did you have to say that," I just gave him a weak smile that said "opps,"
"Oh wow thats awesome you should play something for us after dinner, what instrument do you like to play?," Stef asked.
"Mostly my guitar, its like my safety net I try and take it with me everywhere," Connor said this with pride. I didn't realize his new take on music meant as much to him as it did. which in a way kind of made it hit me that this is a whole new Connor in a way. A new Connor with new interest, not an exact copy of his 13 year old self.
After we all finished eating and cleared our plates we all settled in the living room while Connor went out to his truck to get his guitar.
"So are you going to play the same song I heard you play last night it was really good," I asked looking up at him from the recliner while he got his guitar out.
"No actually, this is a different song, Its actually the first song I wanted you to hear me play but we kind of messed that one up last night," He spoke with a laugh as he looked at me. He had a specific song he wanted to play for me?
"This song is called wherever you are,"
Something 'bout this empty bed
Leaves a hole in me when I rest my head.
I said hey
Where are you lately.
The thought of you makes me insane
Like a fire burning in my brain.
I said hey
Where are you lately.
Loving you is all that I need.
All I know is I want to be
Did he just say loving you? I wonder who he wrote this song for, it couldn't possibly have written about me, right.
Wherever you are
I'm so lost without you.
I'm nothing without you.
I just want to be
Wherever you are
I'd search the world for you
Forever if I had to.
I just want to be
Wherever you are.
I try to lie but I die inside
When I realize that you're not mine.
I said hey
Where are you lately.
I had you to love, to hold.
Now the memories grow dark and cold.
I said hey
Where are you lately.
Yeah this song is totally about me.
Connors eyes met mine as soon as he hit the chorus he was singing to me, serenading me, and I couldn't take my eyes off him. It was like there was no one else in the room or even in the world even but me and him. I understood to some level that Connor had some type of feelings for me that probably rooted from our relationship as kids. I had no clue his emotions could run this deep, I had no clue anybodies emotions could run this deep. Was he confessing his love to me right now?
How could all of this come undone?
I should have known that you were the one.
Now I need you to believe
I'm so lost without you.
I'm nothing without you.
I just want to be
Wherever you are.
I'd search the world for you
Forever if I had to.
I just want to be
Wherever you are.
Wherever you are.
The Connor standing in front of my pouring his heart out through this song, is definitely not a copy of the 13 year old boy I knew. This Connor is different.
He's strong on the inside just as strong as he is on the outside, Connor always had issues expressing his feeling or even being able to understand them. But now Connor is standing here not only in front of me but my mom's too letting us know exactly how he feels. letting me know exactly how he feels.
Something 'bout this empty bed
Leaves a hole in me when I rest my head.
I said hey
Where are you lately?
Wherever you are
I'm nothing with out you.
I'm so lost without you.
I just want to be
Wherever you are,
I'd search the world for you
Forever if I had to.
I just want to be
Wherever you are.
Wherever you are.
Connor finished singing his song and we all sat in momentary silence. I was in shock because my middle school best friend might just have confessed his love to me in front of my moms. And my moms were probably in shock for the same reasons.
Moms started clapping both at the same time wooing and screaming.
"Connor that was amazing who knew you could sing like that, you should join the new glee club at our school that got started last year," Lena continued clapping for the next minute or so.
"that was so good Connor I almost started crying your really talented," Stef spoke up as well wiping the start of tears from her eyes.
"Thank you both so much that means the world to me and Lena I might just look into it when school starts," Connor replied respectfully sending them his 100 watt smile that was shining so bright I swear if I stood at it for too long i would go blind.
"When you get famous you have to promise to save us backstage passes to all of your shows,"
"Deal, so what did you think of it Jude?," Connor looked directly at me this time once again analyzing my every move. Its as if he's peering into my soul when he does this.
"It was the most beautiful thing i've ever heard," What did I just say!? Damn your eyes Connor Damn your eyes.
At this point both of my moms were staring at me shocked by my answer and Connors 100 watt smile instantly turned into a 1000 watt smile at this point. What did I just do?
"Well love, I think its about time we went to bed, It was nice seeing you Connor thanks for the after dinner entertainment and don't be a stranger," Stef spoke up as momma Lena started to protest she forced her upstairs after saying their goodbyes.
"So you want to go upstairs? You haven't been up there in a while," I didn't really give him the chance to answer as I tried to make my escape from this situation.
"Yea love to see what you've done with the place now that its you don't have to share it with Jesus," Connor replied following me up the steps.
We make it up to my room and the second we walk in he jumps on my bed like he owns the place. It made me laugh a little since that was the first thing he always did.
"Bout time you got a bigger bed,"
"Well it was getting harder to sleep comfortably on a bed so small as I got bigger," I replied with a matter of fact attitude as I sat down at the computer desk near the bed.
"God this room brings me back, constant hours of whooping your ass at video games," Connor was laughing as he spoke surveying the room for every little change there might have been.
"I think your memory is a little fuzzy if you think you remember whooping my ass," I replied defensively giving him a little push.
"Hmm I beg to differ,"
We were in silence for a few minutes Connor laying his head back on my bed staring at the ceiling as I sat in the computer chair fumbling with my fingers. What was I supposed to say? What were we supposed to talk about? Especially after that little performance he put down there in my living room. I feel my head is full of nothing but questions lately and very few answers. So I guess its time to say something at least.
"So who was that song about? Anybody important?," Well I guess getting straight to the point never hurt.
"Yeah very important actually, and I think you already know the answer to that question," Connor sat up at this point and I could feel his lingering eyes on me. Not exactly the answer I was hopeing for.
"Connor," His name with a sigh and a little bit of desperation I was fixing to go on this spill on how I was with Taylor and blah blah blah before he cut me off.
"Jude before you say anything can I get the chance to say something to you I should have a long time ago," Connor asked moving off the bed to where he was in front of me and out of habit my gaze moved up to follow his movement on instinct long enough to lock eyes with his. And all I could do now was nod my head in approval.
"Jude, I have been in love with you since I was 13 years old, I was in love with you before I could possibly even understand what being in love meant. These feelings I have for you they're not just derived feeling from a misunderstood boy. No these feeling I have for you earth shattering, dimension bending feeling that I can't control anymore. These last two years nothing has changed when it comes to how I feel if anything they've only intensified. i've spent the last two years dreaming of the day I could see you again, the day I could get past my fathers judging eyes run and come find you. That song was the first song I ever wrote. I spent hours trying to write a song I thought would be good and came up with nothing until Aria told me to write something that comes from the heart something that was so emotional to me I couldn't help but pour it all out on paper. And then once I thought about it after months of trying to find a way of coping with losing you it just started pouring out of me. Jude you are my muse, you are my inspiration, you are everything that make me well me.," Connor belted out his every waking emotion into this speech and I was speechless, breathless.
How was I suposed to react? What was i supposed to do in this kind of situation?
"Jude, say something please," Connor was pleading fear in his eyes waiting for my reaction to his confession for the ages.
I didn't know what to say but I had to say something, I had to do something. So what do I do when I have no clue what to say, I move purely on instinct.
I stood up never unlocking my gaze from Connors, I moved in slowly as if the world was about to stand still with in this next moment just so it could take the image of what I was about to do and keep it for eternity. Eyes locked falling into each other until our noses were a mere inch apart. Our breaths were in sync, our eyes were in sync, and in this instant our hearts were in sync.
" for someone who is bad with words you sure talk a lot,"
Our lips collided as if our lives depended on it, The feel of his warm lips crashing into mine sent little pulses of waves shooting straight through my body. I swear in this second as my eyes were, my hands wrapped around his neck, my running through his hair pulling him in as much as i could. I swear in this second I could see our hearts beating.
BTW song is called Wherever you are by Eric Dill check it out if you get the chance. Might be a couple days before I can write another chapter might be going to Padre for spring break this weekend so wont see another chapter till next week. Tell me what you think good or bad let me know remember reviews keep me motivated.