Hi guys! So I have had a bit of trouble writing this chapter, so I am sorry if it is not up to standard but the next chapter is already wrote and it is a good one so please stick with it! Also thank you for your lovely comments so far to know people are actually enjoying my writing is amazing so thank you!

Disclaimer: I own nothing

We went out on 2 runs while at the cabin, the rest of the time was mostly spent in bed, enjoying one another. Before we knew it it was time to go back to the prison. I hated going back, knowing that as soon as we step back through the gates we wouldn't have this, not what we had at the cabin, all eyes would be on us, and if we went past hand holding in front of everyone there would be people pointing, whispering, oh and the judgmental stares. I just wish we could always be as close as we are at the cabin.

'Ya ready to go?' Merle asked walking in to the bedroom where I was putting a few things into a bag.

'No' I tuned to him putting my arms around his neck. 'I don't want to go back, I just want you' I pushed myself on to my tip toes and place a small kiss on his lip. 'Can't we stay?'

'Ya know we 'ave to go back darlin' he replied putting his hand on my waist resting his stump slightly higher. 'If it wa up to me it would be just us, nobody else, well maybe ma lil brother' he chuckled before whispering and leaning closer to my ear. 'We would 'ave our own shack an you would never leave our bed' he started nuzzling my neck.

'Hmm ' I moaned 'sounds good to me'

'Me too darlin, me too.' We both stayed quiet for a few moments just enjoying standing there in each other's arms. 'Ya know we best get goin, c'mon' he suddenly says moving away.

On the drive back to the prison there seemed to be more walkers, no herds, but groups of 5 or 6 wondering.

'Do ya think the prison will last much longer?' I ask as we drive through another group of them.

'It's stronger than ya think, we wouldn't be goin back if I didn't think it wa safe' he stated confidently pulling me into his side with his arm as if to reassure me. We spent the rest of the drive back like that, me cuddled into his side.

Carl was waiting to open the gate for us once we got back to the prison.

'Beth, I am so glad to see you, hope you had a good time' Daddy said hugging be as I got out of the truck. 'You too Merle, thank you for keeping my little girl safe' he directed his attention to Merle.

'Always will' Merle replied, going to the trunk to pick up the gift I got for Daddy.

'Daddy I got you somethin' I say as I go to the trunk to help lift it out.

He stood there for a moment looking puzzled.

'It is a chalkboard! To advertise activities at the prison! Church services, birthdays'

'Spaghetti Tuesday's!' Carl interrupted surprising me, I didn't realise he was there.

'Well thank you, I'll go and put that up right away! Merle want to give me a hand?'

'That's all I have' Merle replied before turning to me. 'Won't be long, I'll come and find you. An you keep ya hands off ma girl alright?' He stared at carl.

'Yes sir, but if she likes what she sees you can't blame me' Carl replies as Merle walks over to me to kiss me on the fore head before walking off to the prison with daddy.

'I seriously doubt that young un' I do' he mumbled walking away.

'So what do you want to do now the old men are gone' Carl asks once Merles and daddy are out of ear shot.

'Well I need to start taking some stuff in, if you want to help you are more than welcome' I say picking some bags of food up from the trunk.

'Hmm better than the kids group' he said following my lead. We are walking back to the car to get the last lot of bags to take in as Maggie jogs towards us giving me a big hug.

'I have missed you' she says pulling away.

'It is ok I'll take these in and leave you girls to it' Carl announces while picking the last few bags up and leaving as fast as possible as we giggle, stopping as we notice a small box that has fallen out of the trunk where the bags have just come from.

'What is this?' Maggie asks picking the box up.

'Nothing, it is nothing, give me it back!' I try and snatch it back from her knowing exactly what it is.

'It is a ring, a wedding ring' she takes a closer inspection. 'A mans wedding ring. You, your going to ask that low life fucker to marry you?'

'What did you just call him?! Yes, you know what? yes I am, because I love him, I am going to ask Merle Dixon to marry me, happy?'

'No I am not! You can't! He doesn't deserve you! You need someone else, he's not right for you! You need someone your own age! He has no good qualities and you've only known him all of 5 minutes! You can't ask'

'Yes I can' I interrupted her snatching the box away 'I can ask whoever I want, it is my life, I am in love with Merle Dixon and nothing anyone does can change that! I though you got it, thought you saw how happy he makes me! But obviously not! He is a amazing man, he has flaws, who doesn't? but to me he is perfect, he is perfect for me!' I couldn't stand and argue out in the open with her, a few of the Woodbury people where hanging around the yard and where starting to stare. I decided she was not worth it and hurried inside to mine and Merles cell trying not to cry. I thought she would be happy for me, she knew what he meant to me, yet she said that. Well no one said she had to like it. I potter around the room for a bit placing things we had picked up on the last run around the room before laying on our bed waiting for Merle to return. I start reading a book, trying to block out what Maggie had said, hoping Merle would return soon, he was my rock, the one person who truly knew me, who could understand even if he didn't truly know the feeling. I loved him and I wanted to be with him in every way possible. I wasn't naive enough to think he would ask me, to him it wasn't a big thing, defiantly with the world the way it is now but to me it still meant something and I would like to think that would be enough for him to say yes.

I had been shouted to dinner and Merle had still not returned. I walked into the cafeteria to see him and another 5 guys including his brother all sat in the corner drinking. At least 30 maybe 40 empty cans of beer, all what he had collected over our last few runs, scattered over the floor and table. It infuriates me, he told me he would find me, I needed him today and he was sat here getting drunk! I was so mad, not sure if I was mad at myself for not being strong enough to pick myself up after Maggie this morning, or at him. The table Merle and his drunk pals where on was getting louder, the only other option would be to sit with daddy and Maggie who where already whispering so I grab my food and take it back to my cell, not Merles, mine. he wants to get drunk he can, but his drunk ass is not sleeping in my bunk.

As if waiting for the right moment, Rick knocks on my cell door as I finish up eating.

'Hi, can I come in?' He asks, I just nod in response, I haven't got anyone else to keep me company. He slightly nods in response and sits down next to me on the bed. 'Are you ok?'

'I am fine, walking on the freakin sunshine, Rick, thanks for asking' I burst out. Rick looked at me, a bit taken back at my outburst before putting his arm around my shoulder and pulling me into his side.

'What's he done?' He asked concerned.

'It is nothing'

'Beth I know nothing and this is not nothing' He says softly pushing a few stands of hair that had fallen from behind my ear back into place.

'It is Rick, it is nothing, Nothing I can discuss with you anyways!'

'And whys tha?' Rick questions.

'Because...' I start pausing, I know he was trying to help I did but after his confession in the cafeteria I could talk to him, even if I could I still know why I was mad at Merle. 'Because I know how you feel about me, and even if you didn't feel that way I know all you see when you look at him is that drugged up drunk you left back in Atlanta, the same as Carol, Carl, Glenn, even my sister, y'all don't see what I see. No one can, he is a good man, and I love him, so much. So much that every moment apart I miss him, he is on my mind all the time and no one gets that not even him'

'Darlin nobody is against you here. You and ya dad have a lot more faith than the rest of us. You can see the good in people, even when others can't, that's all. Your dad thinks the sun shines out of his arse, you should hear how he talks about you both. He is always rooting for you both, and I just want you to be happy and if that is with a old, racist, sexiest, drug taking, drunk'

'Stop! This is why I can't talk to you!' I shouted 'Merle is the best thing to happen to me! And you don't get it, he is none of those things anymore! He has learnt from his mistakes!'

'Ok ,I am sorry, ok? I get it, I do. I just want you to be aware who he is, who he was, it will always be part of him.'

'It won't!' I more or less scream, sick of the way he is talking, he wants to help but yet can't say 2 nice words about him. 'He did some messed up shit in the past but he is a good man! We can choose to be who we was or who we are and he chose to be who he is, he chose that . We came out to the full prison, to me that showed he was committed, that it is not just sex, by letting them know it proved that, that he truly cares!' Was I trying to prove he was a good man to Rick or myself. At this point I am not sure. 'Y'know what Rick just go. I have had enough with my sister, I don't want to fight with you too!'

'Beth sorry I really am' He mumbled trying to pull me towards him.

'Just get out Rick!' I screamed pushing away before letting tears I never knew I had been holding escape.

'Beth don't do this to yourself' Rick said trying to pull me close again.

'No Rick just go! I want to be alone!' He finally got the message and stood up.

'You know where I am if you want to talk. I am sorry.' He said before leaving my cell letting the curtain fall behind him giving me privacy to cry myself to sleep.

It had been 3 days since we got back from the last run and I still hadn't had an explanation from Merle. He had found me the night he got drunk and even though I had been going back to my own cell on a night,still angry at him. Not over anything in particular, but him starting drinking again was now defiantly a reason, he had come into my cell each night drunk and asking to snuggle while apologising, which to me meant shit all to me while he was drunk. I let him, not having the energy to argue and he would gone by the time I woke up. I wouldn't see him till the next night after when he would be drunk and full of forgiveness for everything and anything. Something was up with him and I needed to know what it was, He was hurting, I was hurting. We need to work this out!

I hadn't been eating in the cafeteria, I was avoiding people in general. So I took my food from the cafeteria but tonight heading to eat in Merles cell, he wasn't there, he was on watch tonight, well so one of the Woodbury people say, but I needed to talk to him and if that means waiting till he comes back then I will wait.

I get comfy on Merles bed and start eating, not a few moments later and a figure is the other side of the curtain, I stand convinced it would be Merle. As the curtain moves I come face to face with Dean one of the Woodbury people, he is a year younger than me if that.

'You don't look as excited to see me as your sister told me but we can soon change that' he whispered before pushing me forcefully back onto the lower bunk.