Disclaimer: Vegeta told me to tell you that you're a pitiful human if you think I own the rights to Sailor Moon or Dragon Ball Z. I don't own a thing!
Four
Life always was both perfect and cruel all in the same token when it dealt with Vegeta and I. Of course he was at my house without his little sex friend but instead of being in my bedroom with me making out, he was currently picking a fight with my father.
Life is so cruel.
Trunks and I landed on the front lawn just in time to witness Vegeta chucking the box he was carrying into the front door of our house. We both gasped in horror as we watched my father physically restraining my frying pan wielding mother. She was after my prince's blood for being so rude but we all knew that she wouldn't have been able to cause any significant damage. But, we all feared that she might just cause my prince to put her in the hospital.
Not good at all.
Vegeta had just scoffed at my mom as he brushed past her entering my home. My mom saw red at his actions and nearly took my dad's head off to try and get her hands on Vegeta.
I have to admit, my prince is so cool!
He's the only person I know that has the balls to stand up to my mother and actually be able to walk away unscathed.
Amazing.
What had been inside of the box was actually a brand new state of the art shower. I didn't understand; we had a perfectly fine, running and working shower. Why did we be made to look like a charity? That tramp was always treating our family like we were some kind of charity case. Always donating to our family as if were really poor mountain folk.
What pissed me off further was that my parents just accepted it whole heartily without question. Didn't they have any kind of pride?
Trunks had been roped into setting it up since my father wasn't what you would call Mr. Fix it. A Bob Vila step by step, idiot proof guide couldn't have even helped him. It was a sad, sad sight.
My brothers had been forcefully volunteered by my mother. I could hear their arguments from my room. They were currently trying to figure out where exactly had they gone wrong, and why their finished product didn't look a thing like the picture on the cover. Apparently, according to Goten, the directions were written in another language. It would only take Trunks and Gohan another twenty minutes before they realized that my twin had been reading the directions upside down.
Meanwhile I was currently stealthily peeking in-between the blinds of my window, trying to catch a glimpse of my prince. While the boys had begun to work on their project my dad had talked Vegeta into coming outside, away from my pan wielding mother.
They were currently talking back and forth in-between each other but not even my sayjin ears could pick up on their conversation. I figured that Vegeta was trying to persuade my father into sparing. I crossed all my fingers and toes that they would so I would have an excuse to go outside and watch them from the sidelines.
But to my own utter shock and amazement instead of throwing a punch, Vegeta began to disrobe.
Mental pictures, that lasted forever!
My jaw dropped. What in the world could they be taking about that would cause Vegeta to suddenly, without warning, allow him to take off his shirt in front of my father?
Oh, no!
Could they be secret lovers?
Fuck, like I didn't have enough obstacles. Now add my father onto the list of Vegeta's harem. They did like to go into the woods together and do special "training" a lot.
My mind reeled at the possibility and the contents in my stomach began to churn. No, this couldn't be true. I was just jumping to silly conclusions. There was no way my dad was gay, he and my mom did it like bunnies. And even though I hated to admit it, Vegeta did have a sex friend at home that was suppose to be taking care of business. Oh no, what if she had turned him gay? What if she had repulsed him so much that he temporally lost his mind, only to seek the comfort of my father?
I'll never forgive her.
For my own sake I needed to insure Vegeta's lust for women and women alone. While crossing my arms I pondered for a second before coming up with the perfect plan.
Usagi's patented Jail Bait Strategies #2
My nimble fingers undid my tie as well as the first two buttons of my shirt. Glancing over at the mirror I checked on my make-up and smoothed down my hair, using my fingers as a comb.
All systems were a go.
Knowing that my brothers were preoccupied with installing the shower I slipped into their bedroom, which was down the hall and around the corner from my own. Walking over to the window I pulled up the blinds, slid it open and slipped out.
Crouching down I inched along the wall, tentatively peeking around the corner to see that indeed Vegeta and my father hadn't moved.
But, more importantly Vegeta was still shirtless.
A strange tingly feeling bubbled in my lower belly but I pushed it away, concentrating solely on the mission at hand.
Mission Objective: Surprise Attack
It was time to pull out the revered C-cup Attack from out of my arsenal. I had never personally used such a heavy loaded attack before but its effects were that of legend.
Readying myself I inhaled deeply before running around the corner and towards my prince. I saw my dad leaning forward slightly grazing upon my prince's chest. "Vegeta you win, you do have more scars than me."
Vegeta huffed, "I told you idiot."
So close! Just a few more steps!
"Ooh! Where did you get this- Oh hey Usagi!" My dad turned his attention from Vegeta to me, causing the sayjin to turn his attention and body towards me.
Crap, abort, abort!
Maybe it had been fate, a little divine intervention but just as I tried to stop myself from plowing into Vegeta's back I had accidentally slipped on the wet grass and tumbled into his chest. Taking advantage of the situation I pressed myself against him.
Direct C-Cup Attack!
But, to my utter shock Vegeta pushed me away, quite forcefully for that matter, causing me to fly across the lawn and land in a big puddle of mud. I could hear my dad's yelp, "Vegeta!" He yelled before turning his attention towards me. "Are you ok sweetie?" He asked as he ran over towards me.
Vegeta crossed his arms, "Hmpt, you should teach that brat to walk! Even a new born brat walks more refined than her."
Mission Status: Complete Failure
Complete and utter humiliation.
Not only did I fail miserably but now I was covered in mud.
I didn't dare spare Vegeta even a glance as I was helped to my feet by my father. It was then that I heard my mother coming out onto the lawn. "Usagi! Your absolutely fifthly! What happened?" My mother demanded and my dad rubbed the back of his head, sheepishly. "Well, Chichi, Usagi had an accident and tripped." My dad explained, leaving out a few key details.
My mother sighed, "Go inside and get undressed. I'll wash your uniform after dinner and I'll check to see if the boys are done with the shower." She said while grabbing me gently by the shoulder and leading me inside. "Honestly, you need to be more careful." She stopped for a second, "Come to think of it, I didn't even hear when you past me to go outside. My senses must be getting weaker."
I coughed, "I don't think so mom. I just have silent feet I guess."
She nodded in agreement before letting me go so I could go to my room. Slowly I got undressed, trying to not let my mud soaked clothes and limbs touch anything in my bedroom.
Yuck, I even had it in my hair.
Going inside my closet I pulled out and wrapped my body in my fluffy robe. As I tied the belt I heard a knock at my door. "Hey Usagi! Mom told me to tell you that the shower is done." I heard Gohan yell through the door.
"Thanks!" I shouted back while picking up an extra set of clothes.
"No problem!"
Trying to brush aside my embarrassment I put on my grade A poker face as I exited my room and headed towards the bathroom. Not to my surprise my twin and Trunks were standing in the hall in front of the bathroom door. They were discussing something or other but their conversation died when they saw me walking up.
Both of them started laughing and I did my best to ignore them as I walked past. Trunks grabbed one of my many mud coated, strands of hair. "Is this some kind of girly beauty routine Usagi or did you have another klutz attack?"
"I think it's the latter choice Trunks," Goten answered for me as they both continued laughing.
"Hardy har har, laugh it up dweebs!" I said as I opened up the bathroom door and slammed it behind me.
"Don't be mad Usa, we were just playing." Trunks yelled through the door while Goten tried to stifle his laughter. "Come on its not that serious."
"Go away!" I yelled as I untied the robe and let it drop to my feet. I could hear Trunks sighing, "Come on Goten lets go play on your Wii." I heard him say and Goten agreed.
Such idiots.
They were such idiots.
And I was an even bigger idiot!
Two mission failures in one day!
This was not going well at all.
While sighing and dropping my shoulders, I entered our new shower and turned on the hot water. I tried to ignore that the jets had a lot more pressure than our old one and the water was coming out a lot hotter at this dial. No, our old one was so much better than the crap that tramp had given us.
I tried to keep my mind focused on coming up with a full proof plan on how to win Vegeta over as I turned the knob to a higher setting. Suddenly it began to shake while emitting a weird sound. It got louder and louder, even the stand that held the shampoo and conditioner dispensers began to tremble.
While panicking I reached over to turn off the water but right as my hand neared it the knob flew right off, hitting me in the chest. I gripped my chest as the pain hit me, my ears perking up as the sound grew louder and now the walls began to shake. "What the he-" I didn't even get out my sentence before the shower nozzle exploded shooting scalding hot water at me.
I screamed and tried to get out of the stream, inventively stepping on the soap causing yet another klutz attack. I slipped falling on the floor, banging my head on the bathtub. I continued screaming in pain from the scalding water and from the bump on my head. Finally when I managed to get up I grabbed onto the one thing I shouldn't have.
The shampoo and conditioner dispenser.
As soon as I was eye level with it my hand slipped and a stream of shampoo went into my left eye.
Burn!
While screaming at the top of my lungs I finally managed to fall face first out of the tub, tangling myself in the shower curtain as I did so.
I was in pain, but at least out of the dreaded hell bath.
"Ow! Crap, I don't see how this could get any worst!" I screamed as I tangled myself out of the curtain, standing up.
I shouldn't have said that.
As I held my eye I saw the door flung across the room, slamming into the toilet. I gasped and turned to see Trunks with his foot raised, and my twin standing at the door. "What happened?!?" Goten yelled frantically, "We heard you screaming!"
Trunks stood there frozen for a second before I saw a blood begin to gush out his nose, he fell to the ground. It was in that moment that I now took in the situation.
I was standing in front of my brother and best friend completely and utterly naked.
I screamed bloody murder. "Get out!"
"What is all this fucking racket?!" I heard a voice call out and heavy footsteps drawing nearer.
Oh no.
Oh please no.
I watched in horror as Vegeta pushed Goten out of the door frame and forced his way in. When his eyes fell upon me he froze gripping my brother's shoulder. His face reddened a bit before he quickly recovered. "Kakarot, your brat has become a harlot! She's parading her undeveloped female body in front of my son and the entire world!"
My jaw dropped and before I had a chance to scream for them all to get out once again a frying pan came from out of no where and slapped Vegeta in the face. "You pervert! Get the hell away from my daughter!" My mother came into the view frame and grabbed Trunks by the collar. "Here take your son with you too!" She yelled at Vegeta who was holding his face.
"You fucking bitch!" He huffed but did as she said and grabbed seemly-comatose Trunks, dragging him away. Goten left with them and my mom entered the bathroom wrapping me in a towel.
"Just what in the blue hell happened here?" She asked while surveying the damage done to the bathroom.
"It broke," was all that I managed to get out.
My entire body was the shade of a tomato.
Undeveloped?
Harlot?
This was all that tramps fault! Her and her damn shower! As God as my witness I would one day get her back for this! Mark my words!
Revenge is defiantly a dish that I was planning on serving ice cold.
An: Thank AquaTonic for betaing! Thanks for all the great reviews. I have to admit I'm having so much fun writing this story.. I'm currently working on chapter six.. can't wait for ya'll to read it!
Saiyagurl87: Yea there is going to be a really cool cameo in the next chapter.
Ladyredvelvet: I don't dislike mamoru, I love him actually.. though I do prefer manga version of him over anime. Thanks for pointing out some of my errors as well, thanks for your compliments.
Sakura Lisel: the (censored) is not when Usagi is cursing but when someone says Bulma's name. The story is told by Usagi and in her thoughts so she's censoring her name cause she despises her and doesn't like to call her anything besides tramp, ect. Thanks for reviewing!
Essence-Chan: Aw, thank you!
Cosmic-lover: Thanks! I love her stubbornness as well as well as the name calling!
Thank you all, please continue to support me in the future!
Ills
Ps- if your bored and have nothing to do go to youtube and look a video called "vegeta kicked my dog" hilarious!