Chapter 4

Fili blamed himself. It never should have happened. He knew to never assume that his enemies were dead unless their heads were cleaved off. Kili was the younger, he should have followed behind Kili, not the other way around.

Fili sat beside Kili's cot waiting for his younger brother to awaken. Fili had not seen the attack. His blue eyes were focused on Bilbo as Oin and Thorin took the hobbit to a healing tent. Legolas had said his goodbyes shortly thereafter. The elf prince had to find his father before Thranduil fretted about his son. Before leaving, Kili and Legolas shared a hand shake and a hearty thanks. Animosity between that elf and dwarf was now forgotten.

Kili had lingered still confused by Fili's actions with Frodo's ring. "I still don't understand what you did. Bilbo never mentioned it talking to him." That sentence was followed by a loud scream of agony. One of the fallen orcs had regained consciousness as Kili walked by. The foul creature had grabbed a broken sword and swiped viciously at Kili's legs. Taken unawares, Kili crumbled to ground in a yelp of pain.

Fili swirled and darted forward. The next swipe of the orc was met soundly by Fili's own blade. Fili's vision was a red haze of anger. The orc offered no serious defense and in a matter of seconds the contest was over. The orc's head arched high in the sky as it was separated from his body.

Even as the corpse fell to the sodden ground, Fili was on his knees cradling Kili.

Kili looked up to his brother's worried face and let out a huge gasp.

"Didn't see the bastard. Sorry." Kili grunted out.

"Healer! I need a healer!" Fili shouted loudly. Then he turned his focus back to Kili. "Why are you apologizing, You're the one hurt. I need a healer!" Fili yelled once more.

A dwarf who was busy running checking on the wounded came running by. This new dwarf was old and his garments indicated that he was a member of the Iron Hills Clan. He moved aside Kili's bloodied clothing aside . With an expert's eye , the dwarf appraised the wounds. He was soon followed by someone the brothers did recognize, Ori.

"He'll live. Take him up there and I'll bind the wounds. Then we'll get the boy to surgery." The elder healer picked himself out of the muck and moved on toward the area where many dwarves had gathered.

"Ori, tell Thorin Kili was injured and I will be with him. Give me news of Bilbo as your able."

Ori had been whispering words of encouragement to Kili. His gingered head nodded. "At once. It's good to see you both!" He added as he scrambled toward Thorin and the others.

For some reason that made Kili laugh. Fili was feeling the exhaustion of the battle slip into his body as he picked up Kili's slight frame. He faltered a second, but mustered through the weariness.

"Why are you laughing?" Fili mumbled as he made sure his footing remained solid on the slippery ground.

"Because, I'm glad to see us too!" Kili laughed then moaned.

Fili was determined to keep his brother distracted from his wounds. "You doubted our plan? I'm wounded." Fili grunted out.

"No, I am." More laughter. Fili rolled his eyes. His brother was punch drunk from weariness and blood loss.

"That is not funny."

"Course not."

Silence for a few moments then the ground became less treacherous and level.

"It hurts." It was a simple statement, but raw in its emotion. Kili had been through so much these last hours. To admit that he was needy, that he was in pain was relief. Only to Fili could he show his vulnerability.

"Yes, but you will be better soon. I will not leave your side, nor allow anything to harm you again." Fili assured.

Kili let go a deep breath and relaxed some against Fili.

That was hours ago. Kili had passed out shortly after arriving at the Iron Hills clan's healing tent. Kili's leg wounds were cleaned. The horrible wounds across both his thighs stitched.

Fili learned that the elder healer's name was Norion. Norion explained that Kili would heal, but would require much care for infection. Kili would not be walking anytime soon either. Fili had thanked him for Kili's care.

Fili lay beside his brother's cot. Sometime in the morning, another dwarf had given him water and some hard bread and cheese. While Kili slept, he had dozed off. Now it was late afternoon.

Fili rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He was somewhat surprised that none of the company had found them yet. However, a part of him was also relieved. By now Thorin would have heard why the elves and humans had willingly joined in the battle. Fili did not yet feel up to his Uncle's wrath. It was a coward's excuse, to be sure. While Kili still slept, he would not leave. No one here had asked for their names and he had not offered. Fili hoped that Bilbo was alright. That the lack of attention was not due to grieving on the part of his kin.

Kili awoke with a start. He sat bolt upright, his eyes wild and unfocused. Kili then grimaced in pain.

Fili was beside him gathering him up in his arms. "Its alright. The battle's won."

"Fili?"

"Yea, I'm here." Fili muttered.

Sigh, "We survived." Kili seemed surprised.

"Yes. Azog is dead and the enemy is scattered. Erebor is now truly ours." Kili was calmed now so Fili just moved to sit beside his brother.

"Bilbo?" Kili looked around the healing tent.

"I know naught. I have not left your side. None of our kin has found us yet."

Kili blinked. "Oh. You think that's on purpose?" He couldn't disguise the hurt in his voice. It had been one thing to discuss being banished, but the actual thought terrified him. Thorin had been the only constant in their short lives.

"It might." Fili admitted.

"Well, damn." Kili muttered. "I expected fireworks." He felt guilty that his voice sounded relieved.

"I don't think we are out of the fire yet brother. I think this is on the quiet lull before all hell breaks loose. The healer says you'll be fine. It'll be a while though before you are up to any walking or riding."

"Hmmph. If we are banished, I am not going to crawl away. I'm proud of what we did. What you did." Kili's fire had returned.

"And I will carry you if I must. Just rest now Kili. But I must know, what happened with the elves?"

Kili became uncharacteristically quiet. Fili though needed to know. He had seen how Kili's hair was now clasped, He recognized that his braids were gone. Now that Kili was cleaned, it was apparent his beard was also removed.

Kili clung to his older brother's arm. The shame of his treatment by Thranduil momentarily overwhelming.

"Kili, please. Let me understand before Uncle starts another war." Fili pleaded.

Kili's voice sounded small, "I don't know that he will care. Not if the gold madness still claims his heart."

"I do." Fili declared.

Kili finally found the words. "Thranduil wasn't satisfied with the emeralds. He wanted more."

Fili stroked Kili's dark head. "Your braids."

"Yes."

"Your beard?" It broke Fili's heart to ask. To take a dwarf's hair in such a matter was the height of disgrace. Thranduil had wanted dwarf pride taken to its lowest point.

Kili nodded. Fili felt a cold white rage begin to boil in his gut. One day, he would find away to return this treatment to the Mirkwood King. However, he let none of that affect his gentle hold or words.

"It will be alright. Your hair will grow back. You fought bravely, no one will question your honor." Fili smiled at Kili.

The younger brother nodded. He still dreaded the others finding out. Fili soon realized that Kili wasn't ready to share more about what happened. He wasn't going to push the issue. The two sat talking about their roles in the battle. How odd it had felt to be standing with humans and the elves. The actual reality of the war had been nothing like they had imagined.

While in conversation, a dwarf handed the brothers a simple meal. Kili ate some bread and cheese while Fili sat nearby. Both were lost in thought. They were like this when Bofur found the two young dwarves.

"Thank Mahal! Here you two are. We searched this tent before, calling for you"

Fili reluctantly admitted, "We were asleep. "

"We'd been searching for hours." Bofur ran up to them. He embraced the brothers. Both boys felt relief to know that yet another member of the company seemed pleased to see them once more. "Don't you two lads ever run off like that again! We've been worried sick. How bad is it?"

Kili grinned, maybe they wouldn't be forced to leave. Fili knew that Bofur was never likely to blame the boys for their actions.

"Kili has deep cuts in his thighs. It will be a while before he walks, but he will recover fully. What of the rest of our company?"

Bofur kneeled down. "Mostly cuts, bruises, a couple of mild co concussions. We've had worse. Bilbo, though, he is not yet out of the woods."

"We saw what he did to Azog. Once again our small hobbit has rescued uncle." Kili stated.

Fili let go of some of the stress he felt. "This is good news." He paused and took a deep breath before asking. "What of Thorin? Is he?"

Bofur's happiness at seeing the two faded. Immediately the two brothers braced themselves.

"He is in a right state. Thorin was enraged to learn that the Arkenstone now rested with Bard and his people. It didn't help to discover that the other nephew took emeralds and humiliated himself in front of Thranduil and his lot." Bofur admitted.

Fili spoke through gritted teeth. "My brother suffered so that we might have the allies we needed to survive the night. He is a hero. I will not have anyone say otherwise."

Bofur nodded. "Aye, I agree with you two. I only repeat what Thorin has said."

"He still has it then? The gold madness?" Kili asked.

Bofur's eyes showe'd his disappointment in Thorin. "I'm sorry boys. I'd hoped battle would have cured him of it. It did for the rest of us. He's anger is made worse from his fear that Bilbo will die."

Kili looked up at Fili. Without words they came to a decision.

"Then we will accept our fate. There is no point in delaying. Tell Uncle you've found us. I will carry Kili to his tent. Together we will face his wrath, but we will not do it here." Fili instructed.

Bofur shook his head. "I'm sorry boys. No matter what happens with your Uncle, know that the rest of us, well, we think you to be heroes."

"Thanks." the two muttered. Bofur nodded and took his leave.

"So you got a plan for banishment? Where do we go?" Kili asked in a hushed voice.

Fili shrugged. "To Laketown. Bard will give us shelter. I can find work there until you recover. Then we'll do what

"ever the hell we feel like. It'll be okay Fili. As long as were together."

"agreed." Fili finished for him.

It took Fili longer than he expected to reach the tent. Kili kept trying to be put down and hop there. Fili wouldn't allow it. Once the two toppled to the ground. Fili was alarmed that Kili's stitches were burst, but a quick inspection revealed no harm done.

The two steadfastly refused all help from anyone. They had made their decisions on their own. They would face the outcome alone as well.

Finally, Kili drew back the flap to Thorin's tent and the two brothers stumbled in. Bilbo laid pale against white sheets. He seemed to barely breathing. Thorin sat by his side.

When the two boys wandered in , Thorin rose rapidly. At first the boys were surprised as Thorin graced the two with a look of concern and relief. He walked up to the them and embraced them. For a moment Thorin was the dwarf they remembered. A dwarf that loved his family, his friends more than anything.

But that moment was over quickly. Thorin stepped back and watched when Fili gently lay his brother down on another cot.

Fili's heart was pounding so hard, he could hear the blood in his ears. Had Thorin forgiven them?

His answer was painful. As soon as Fili turned to look back at his uncle, he felt a gloved hand strike him so hard he fell to the ground.

"FILI!" Kili shouted and made to move toward his injured sibling.

Fili looked up and waved his hands toward Kili. 'Stay put.' He indicated.

Fili was in shock. Never before had Thorin struck either of his sister-sons. Fili then righted himself and looked Thorin straight in the eye. He would take this punishment as an adult.

"You traitorous filth? How dare you? You had no right. NONE." Thorin screamed, his words jumbled so lost was he to his rage.

Thorin struck him once more, this time Fili remained upright. Kili yelled in anger.

"You are disowned, banished. Never again shall you lay claim to the name of Durin. Fili, son of Dis, you are banished from my sight. Never lay foot in Erebor or risk my punishment."

Fili nodded. He knew that any attempt to dissuade or defend himself was futile. He took several deep breaths. He had known that this was the most likely outcome from their actions. Still it was painful that it had come to this. Fili gave his brother a look. It stopped Kili from the shouting his own anger at their Uncle. Fili did not want Kili to say words he might regret later. Fili bent down and began to gather Kili up into an upright position.

Thorin's growled, "What in Durin's name do you think you are doing?"

"We're leaving." Fili thought it was obvious.

"I banished you Fili, not your brother." Thorin pointed out.

"What?" The two said in unison. Disbelief starkly shown upon their faces.

Kili was shaking his head emphatically. "No. No."

"We will not be separated." Fili growled. Behind him Kili reached out and grabbed his brother's hand. "You may take everything from me, my name, my gold, my birthright but you will not take him."

Thorin took a step back so great was Fili's anger. Thorin's voice lowered. "He did not steal the Arkenstone. You did. He will not share your punishment in this."

"I will not stay. I go with my brother." Kili shouted.

"No. You will stay as I have ordered. Your brother can not care for you now. Your injuries are too severe."

"Like you give a damn. I don't want your care. Or your damn gold. I share as much of the responsibility as Fili. I leave with him." Kili spit out. Never before had Fili seen Kili so angered.

Fili thought furiously. As much as he hated to admit it. Thorin had a point. He was in no position to care for his brother as he needed. Laketown was mostly destroyed. Shelter was almost nonexistent. It was no place for Kili to recover.

Fili swiveled and fell to Kili's side. Taking his brother's head between his palms, Fili stared directly into Kili's eyes. "He's right. I can't care for you on my own yet."

Kili could not believe his ears. "No! Don't do this. Don't leave me!"

"Listen. Listen to me. You have to get better. You have to let your legs heal." Fili begged.

Thorin interrupted. "In this, Fili speaks sense."

"SHUT UP!" Kili screamed. "I don't give a damn what you think."

Fili turned toward Thorin whose rage was about to return. "Please, a moment alone. Let me talk to him. Let me say goodbye."

Thorin took a deep breath. Seeing his two nephews so absolutely defeated suddenly made him feel ashamed. A part of his soul was weeping as well, but it seem helpless against the anger he felt. The King nodded. Without another word he left.

Kili pulled himself upright. The pressure on his wounds caused the pain to flare up. Fili however, motioned to set him back down again. The two tussled for a few moments. Kili started to strike out not believing that Fili would abandon him. The young dwarf was out of his mind in grief.

Fili let the soft blows fall and did nothing to stop them. Instead he grabbed Kili and bear hugged him. Kili eventually stopped and returned the grasp instead.

"Don't go. Don't leave me." He begged.

"Kili, we don't have a choice. Look at me." Fili ordered and Kili obeyed. "You're only going to stay here until your legs are better. Understand? When you are completely healed, you will come to me in Laketown."

"Laketown?"

"Yes, I will not leave the place without you. Until then you heal. Maybe look for ways to cure the gold madness in the library. Can you do this for me Kili?"

Kili repeated wanting to make certain he understood, "Only until I'm healed."

"Yes." Fili nodded. Kili finally lost some of the wild look in his eyes. "Try to stay out of Thorin's way. Keep your head low. Do not anger him. Especially on my behalf."

"I hate him," Kili spat out.

"No Kili, you hate his illness, not Thorin. This isn't our Uncle. He isn't the man who raised us now. Remember that."

They both turned when the tent flap was rustled. To their mutual relief it was Balin who entered.

Balin appeared to have aged a decade in the few days apart. He eyes betrayed his opinion of Thorin's rage.

"Laddies, I'm sorry, but time's up. Fili, you need to leave." Balin walked over the two. He embraced Fili. "Don't worry, we will watch over him. By Durin's beard we swear it."

Fili returned the embrace. "I'll be in Laketown. Send me word if anything happens to Kili."

"I'll do better than that. I will make certain that any "correspondence" passes safely between you two."

"Thank you Cousin." Fili managed to say. Everything was catching up to him. He was having to leave Kili behind.

"Go. While you can still make it in daylight. Many goblin and orc still abound." Balin explained.

The brothers hugged once more. "I'll see you soon." Fili let go and made for the tent entrance. He paused to glance back at Kili who looked more lost and young than Fili could ever remember.

Kili signed, "Be careful"

Fili returned the sign then departed.

Dwalin was waiting for Fili.

"I'm to escort ya to the boundary." Dwalin explained.

Fili nodded. He gave one last glance at the tent, then at the Lonely Mountain. He steeled his heart. He would not walk out of this place with his head held low.

Dwarves looked at the two as they passed. Mutters reached his ears, but Fili did not react to harsh words or embarrassing glares.

Soon the two passed out of the range of the Iron Hills dwarfs encampment. It was here that Dwalin finally spoke again.

"Be careful cousin."

Fili realized that Dwalin still counted him as kin regardless of the banishment. It was a small comfort.

Fili had one last request. "Watch over them for me. Help Kili, please. This will be hard on him."

"I will. Be patient Fili. We'll find a way out of this." Dwalin replied surprising Fili.

Fili was out of words, out of emotion. He just nodded and began the long walk to where the humans now lived.