Her cabin was quiet and a little cold. It was always cold in there. She sat at her private terminal, staring at the blinking light indicating that she had received a new message. Her mind was preoccupied with her last conversation with Thane.
She learned a lot from him; that he was trained to be an assassin at the young age of six. Not that she was judging the Hanar or the drell himself; some of her fellow orphans back on Earth killed at such a young age for food.
It was almost heartbreaking to hear about what happened to his home world. Of course, that was the issue with some planets. To some degree, she understood the Compact between the Drell and the Hanar. To each his own. She always did her best not to sound like some condescending asshole, even though some of the things she said seemed that way.
The thing she found most fascinating about him was the random outburst of an old memory. He didn't want to talk about it, naturally. But it only made her curiosity about him heighten more.
Her eyes fell on the photo of Kaidan. She sighed. Her mind and heart were both still at war with one another over whether or not she should be angry with him or try to comprehend where he was coming from.
To distract herself from those thoughts, she quickly opened the new message on her private terminal. Her eyes read the name of the sender; Kaidan.
She quickly opened it:
Shepard,
I know my last message to you probably didn't warrant a reply. I wasn't expecting you to, being that we are both in a very awkward emotional situation. I would like to speak with you. But being that you are busy doing whatever it is you're doing, I know that it's likely impossible to speak this out in person. I will be available today, all day. Feel free to speak with me over vid comm. I would appreciate it if you did. We need to clear the air between us.
-Kaidan
She closed the message. She needed a friend's input on this right now. She decided to go to one of her trusted buddies, who just so happened to be dwelling in the main battery.
"Shepard, need me for something?" Garrus asked.
"Take a break from your calibrations, Garrus, I really need to speak to you," she demanded, taking a seat on the small area near his computer.
Garrus laughed quietly, "What is it?"
"I got a message from Kaidan," she blurted out, leaning forward, elbows on her knees, "He wants to speak, not in person, over the comm, but I'm not sure if I should."
"Why is that?"
She shrugged, "Come on, Garrus, you were there on Horizon. You saw his reaction. And you read the message he sent to me. I'm just not sure if I'm ready to speak to him, even if I want to."
Garrus sighed, and leaned against the terminal, "It's not a matter if you're ready or not. There is a lot of tension between the both of you and personally, I think it would do the both of you good to clear the air. You can't afford to be distracted right now, take whatever opportunity you can to make things right."
Joan breathed in and leaned back against the wall, "I guess you're right. Strange that I come to you with shit like this."
"I'm your battle buddy, if you can trust me to have your back against the likes of Saren, then you can trust I will give you some insight into your personal life," he joked.
She laughed, then she stood up, "Thanks Garrus, I'll let you get back to your calibrations now."
"Anytime," he said, "These guns aren't going to calibrate themselves."