A/N: Thank you once again for the alerts, reviews, favorites, and everything else that comes with y'all being awesome. It truly helps to motivate me when I know people are enjoying my work. Once again I don't own Glee or Cry-Baby.
Chapter 4: Mending.
Finn Hudson was a fuck up. As he walked down the halls of McKinley High he realized what a mistake he'd made. He'd broken his best friend's heart, humiliated her, and what he got in return wasn't even worth it! Going public with Rachel had been a nightmare. School had been in session for almost a month now and every time he saw Mercedes in the halls she was smiling. His heart constricted each time he saw her smile, he knew deep down he'd taken that away from her years ago. Finn would let out an audible groan when he saw her in the halls leaning against the lockers with her little Cry-Baby friends looking better than she ever had and he'd kick himself. He'd see her at lunch laughing as she sat in the bleachers with her new little crew and he'd want to crawl across the field on hand and knee and apologize. He couldn't admit it out loud but he knew he'd taken advantage of the only person who truly loved him besides his mother and father. Mentally he was a wreck over her. This was supposed to be easy, dump one girl and gain another. But Mercedes Jones was all he could think about.
For the first time in seventeen years the big man on campus felt ashamed. He'd treated Mercedes poorly from the time he met her. He'd taken her admiration and love and used it as a leash and collar. Instead of encouraging her he'd controlled her. Instead of loving and worshipping her he took advantage and guilt tripped her. Even their first time had been forced and out of obligation on her part. He knew she wasn't comfortable and proceeded anyway because he was selfish. It should have been perfect and pleasurable but instead it was all about him, just another way to keep her on a tight leash.
He'd always been afraid that if he let her go too far she'd leave him. During their friendship Mercedes had been so full of life. She'd out shown Rachel without even trying. That's why Rachel hated her so much. Her star was so bright and Finn wanted to keep that for himself. In his mind no one but him deserved her light but instead of nurturing it he smothered it. His insecurity manifested as contorting and crushing her spirit. Years later after it turned into romance it ended with him sleeping with Rachel Berry, a girl he barely liked despite knowing her since they were in diapers.
Finn painted on a smile as he approached the girl he'd left his angel for. Rachel looked to him and almost beamed as she began chattering about glee club rehearsals that day and her ideas for new songs to perform on Saturday. He kept enough of an ear open to respond but it all went down the drain when he saw Mercedes walk down the hall flanked between Santana and Quinn who each shot him death glares. He wanted to shove Rachel into a locker and chase after her.
She looked different today. As she passed him he realized she'd added the extensions she always wanted. Sure her real hair was beautiful but the enhancement only served to make her even more gorgeous. He remembered the day she asked him if she should get them last year and he'd said no. In truth he knew she shouldn't have even asked him, but he always made sure she knew only his opinion mattered. He'd been such an asshole to her.
He openly stared as she walked by her hair was now long and black. It trailed down her back to her perky round rear end. He whimpered as she passed him she looked sexy. Even her new jeans were amazing. He'd always known she had a great body but much to his chagrin everyone else in school did too. She looked good, damn good. He'd always discouraged her from getting extensions or changing anything about her looks. He wanted her to stay the same. No one could steal her if they didn't know how beautiful she truly was. He wanted to be the only one that looked at her. He felt a wave of shame at realizing he'd even told her how pretty she was. Not even at junior prom last year. She'd taken so much time in getting ready and making sure she looked her best. He was such an asshole!
"Finnegan!" Rachel barked. Her voice ripped him from his thoughts. The shrill voice had become increasingly irritating over the last few months. When he wasn't screwing her he'd prefer that she stay silent. Even the sex wasn't worth his time anymore. Rachel's body hadn't been as appealing as it was in the beginning.
"What?" He bit back just as harshly.
"Are you listening to me? I'm talking about glee rehearsals." She said as she rolled her eyes and wrapped her arm in his.
"Yes, please continue." He said trying to hide his boredom. All Rachel talked about was herself, senior prom, glee, and Broadway. He wasn't interested in any of those things. He missed Mercedes. She always listened when he spoke. Well, it was usually him talking and her listening. He'd taken her for granted and now according to his father he was paying the price for being an ass. Rachel was his karma.
"So after school I was thinking you, Kurt, and I could get together and go over our campaign for student counsel this year and then maybe you and I could get a little personal?" She said as she walked her boney man-fingers up his arm. What had he seen in her? Sex with her had been so mediocre after his first time with Mercedes.
"Yeah, sure Rachel." He said absently.
"Is there something wrong with you Finny-poo, you've been so distant?" Rachel asked. Finn felt his skin crawl. He hated nicknames almost as much as he hated her narrow hips.
"No, Rachel. I'm fine." He said in clipped tones.
"Finn." She said stopping in the middle of the hall and crossing her arms. "What is going on with you? Every time that heifer walks down the hall with her merry band of miscreants you seem to zone out. Do you still have feelings for her? Do you want her?" She asked as she tapped her foot impatiently. "I will not play second fiddle to Mercedes Jones of all people. You better get your head back in the game Mister before you find yourself alone!" The little brunette barked as several of his teammates walked by laughing as they witnessed the verbal undressing Rachel was giving him. Finn had had enough. He took Rachel by the hand leading her into an empty long forgotten chorus room.
"Rachel, enough." He said.
"What do you mean Finn?" She asked looking at him with wide eyes. Somehow her doe eyes didn't compare with Mercedes.
"I didn't sign up for this Rachel. You are controlling, overbearing, and you just embarrassed me in front of my teammates. I'm captain and first string quarterback. I need to make sure I always hold a place of authority and you…cutting me down in front of my team will get me pummeled on the field!" Finn said as he held his hands out. He couldn't believe he'd been reduced to begging his girlfriend to stop embarrassing him,
"Oh, so I embarrass you now?" She asked as she started to tear up. Finn had a soft spot for girls in tears and Rachel seemed to cry on command.
"Rachel…" He said as he took her in his arms rocking her back and forth.
"Finn, I just love you so much. I don't embarrass you do I?" She asked. Finn noticed Rachel never apologized.
"Rachel, I need you to tone it down especially in front of the guys." He said as he rubbed her back and kissed the top of her head.
"I'm not Mercedes, Finn." She said as she pulled away. "You're not dating the church mouse anymore. You're dating me. Now if you want all of this you're going to take me as I am. Rachel Berry doesn't compromise." She said as she took a deep breath and walked out of the room. What had Finn done?
Some could say Rachel was a brat, she was selfish. Some could say that not knowing her birth mother caused her to overcompensate. Some could say Rachel suffered from only child syndrome. Some could say Rachel overcompensated for not having a mother by bossing her peers around. In truth Rachel Berry was just a star in her own mind; she was just waiting for everyone else to see it. As she walked down the halls of the school with her perfectly handsome boyfriend, and fabulous best friend she watched as girls stared in jealousy. Everyone wanted to be her, and those that didn't want to be her simply just wanted her. In her mind she was perfect. She had a great voice, hard body, and thanks to Kurt a wicked sense of style. She adjusted the large bow of her lacy blouse with one hand as she added a little extra swish to her step. In truth no one was looking at Rachel with jealousy. They were looking at Finn with pity and her with a thinly disguised veil of hate. No one liked Rachel, but they were afraid of her.
Rachel mastered social annihilation early in life. Those she deemed competition were manipulated and assimilated into her world where they were then turned into what she wanted them to be. Those that refused her unique brand of friendship were annihilated. Mercedes was a prime example of that assimilation. She was the only one of her projects too dangerous to let loose. She was the only one that needed to be kept close and monitored. Rachel always knew if she let Mercedes go too far she'd break free and take everything Rachel wanted. Rachel was terrified of Mercedes talent and to a degree her looks. In Rachel's mind it took a special kind of boy to like a girl like Mercedes; incidentally it had been the boy she wanted: Finnegan Hudson.
She knew the girl was special even at five years old. The little poufy haired, chubby cheeked cherub was an instant hit her first day at McKinley Elementary. Rachel saw her surrounded by boys and girls as she told them stories of her life in New York, answering questions, and sharing her gummy worms. Rachel saw red at seeing the attention the little chocolate skinned girl received. This was her playground. These were her friends. She broke through the group and announced Mercedes was going to play Princesses and Knights with her and her friends. She took the little girl by the hand and jerked her away introducing her to Finn, and Kurt. She informed the girl that they ruled the playground. As long as Mercedes did what Rachel asked she could rule the playground right along with her. Wanting friends so badly Mercedes complied. It had been like shooting fish in a barrel for Rachel to control the girl after that.
Rachel spent the next twelve years making sure Mercedes never saw how special she was. She became obsessed with putting her down. When she heard her sing for the first time she discouraged her, letting her know that no one would listen to "that sort of thing". She even told her she was tone deaf. She'd taken pleasure in that. She later put her arm around her and told her she'd make a great backup singer, and she had powerful lungs for belting out that hard note. That's how the soul note started.
When she wanted to go out for first chair in orchestra, Rachel discouraged her telling her that she would embarrass herself. In truth she didn't want Mercedes to get farther than she did, even neck and neck was too close for Rachel's comfort. The girl put a lot of energy into keeping Mercedes down. It didn't take a genius to see Rachel was insecure and needed constant affirmation of her stardom as well as to crush people along the way.
When she met Sunshine she felt the same way she'd felt at five when she met Mercedes. Sunshine was going to be a big star and that made Rachel very uneasy. She adopted the same tactics of assimilation and annihilation. She befriended the girl; Rachel had a face that was easy to trust. Sunshine was smart though. She saw through Rachel and her manipulations. When it all backfired she got desperate. A desperate Rachel was a dangerous Rachel. The day of auditions she sent Sunshine to the worst part of town and to the only known crack house in Lima. Sunshine transferred schools shortly after. Rachel feigned ignorance.
The annihilation of the New Directions had been out of pure selfishness and for entertainment. Rachel was lazy, all she wanted to do was sing lead and garner notoriety for having the best voice in Ohio. Then one day the world when she took Broadway by storm. But she didn't want to work for it. That meant she didn't care about show choir competitions or numbers or even rules. The group was becoming a democracy instead of her carefully constructed monarchy. In all of the clubs she ran her word was law. The group of strong willed people started to question her always getting lead. They started to demand auditions instead of automatic selection. They were starting to demand that the songs even be broken into parts for everyone to sing!
No one was heard in that choir except Rachel. It was her club and hers alone. In her mind she allowed those people to be there and to sing behind her. It was an honor to be her backup. After hearing the mutiny she put her plan in motion to get them out of her club before they ruined everything. Two weeks passed and she didn't have the energy so she simply asked Mr. Scheuster to kick them all out. She insisted they weren't team players and they ruined the tranquility of the club. It took two weeks but eventually Puck, Quinn, Santana, and Brittany were asked to leave and their schedules changed. Rachel felt no love lost. Mercedes lost the only friends she'd ever had outside of Rachel, Finn, and Kurt. Knowing this was a consolation prize for Rachel. She never wanted to see Mercedes have more than she did. This included friends too.
As Rachel watched the girl walk by laughing and happy with the ousted traitors of her group her fists balled and she counted to three. She noticed the hair, and different clothes. She was annoyed. Rachel closed her eyes and thought Mercedes didn't matter anymore. She got the boyfriend and best friend. Mercedes could have her little group of losers. Rachel was top banana. She looked over at Kurt and Blaine as they fell into step with her. She shot Kurt and smile and picked up her phone to text him. Kurt watched and wanted to roll his eyes. No doubt it was to text and talk shit about Mercedes' new hair. Rachel had been on a tangent lately when it came to the girl. Kurt knew that only meant one thing, she was scared. Kurt missed Mercedes. She'd never do this.
Kurt had attachment issues, and he hated to share. This made Kurt a very lonely boy until he met Rachel. She was a girl so controlling and manipulative that it made Kurt look saintly. So people flocked to him to talk or play instead of her. Kurt Hummel-Hudson grew up lonely. Always knowing he was different caused him to withdraw until he met Rachel. Rachel made him feel normal. When Finn came along he made Kurt feel safe; he protected him from the bullies and the things that went bump in the night when their parents began dating in the second grade. When he met Mercedes it was like feeling sunshine. She was forgiving, kind, and seemed to not know what malice was.
Kurt knew he had Blaine and his friends but he no longer had Mercedes. He'd grown attached to her, unable to let her go. When she confronted him on his part in the cover up of Rachel and Finn's indiscretions he'd been crushed when she refused to forgive him. On some level he expected her forgiveness.
He felt a cold spot next to him when he walked down the halls. He knew he'd never treated Mercedes right. He'd been mean and cruel to her. He'd suffocated her. He'd even demanded she dress in those God awful clothes. Kurt knew now he was cruel but that didn't mean he didn't love Mercedes. Watching her for the last two weeks he felt only sadness. She looked so happy without them. She was thriving. He realized right along with Finn that he'd had a part in taking away her joy. But like his brother he didn't want to admit it. He'd stripped her of it in order to keep her close. He never wanted to worry about sharing Mercedes. In some twisted way he was in love with her. Not in an entirely romantic way but in a way that was possessive and dark. He wanted to be the only one that knew her secrets. He wanted to keep her close and hidden away from the world. He craved her light. Kurt felt as Finn did, if he couldn't have her no one else should.
Kurt noticed the changes over the weeks. He noticed the change in hair. He noticed the changes in her clothes. She looked amazing. He shouldn't have discouraged her from blossoming so many years ago when she wanted to experiment, to grow, to change. But something made him tell her it was a bad idea. He couldn't remember now why he held her back so much. No, he did, it was fear and jealousy. He didn't even know where his possessive nature came from. He saw a smile she hadn't worn in years. Her normal tight lipped fakeness gone, he noticed she truly smiled around her new friends. It hurt that she hadn't even spared him a glance in the halls. It angered him that she smiled and laughed as if she hadn't just had her heart broken. Shouldn't she still be mourning the loss of her friends? Kurt got angry again, forgetting his shame as he pulled out his phone to respond. She looked like hell. She should be mourning, not laughing. Kurt Hummel was no better than his partner in crime.
Mercedes Jones had no fucks to be given as she walked with her new friends. Her life was good again and this time it was on her terms. Sure she'd seen her former friends walking the halls engaged in mindless chatter. She couldn't miss them. At 6'3" Finn was hard to miss in his bright red letterman's jacket. Kurt shone like a disco ball in sequins; it was hard to miss him. Rachel, with her unnaturally loud voice and animated hand gestures made it hard to miss her. But Mercedes didn't miss them. She didn't care about any of them. She concentrated on the girls walking on either side of her.
"Damn, 'Cedes! What's with the new hair? You getting brand new on everyone?" Santana asked as she reached out to touch the jet black tracks. Mercedes quickly batted her hand away.
"I'm trying something new. What, you don't like it?" Mercedes tried not to show panic. She was so used to seeking approval.
"I think it looks hot. You're turning into one bad mama." Quinn said as she bumped her hip into Mercedes. "Next time you should do some bright green. I bet Sam would like it." She said with a smirk.
"Why would I care about what Sam likes?" Mercedes looked over her shoulder and rolled her eyes.
"We see the way you look at him girl. It's no secret. Every girl in this school wants to jump Cry-Baby. Why should you be any different?" Santana said as she stopped at her locker.
"Well you can cross me off that damn list. I'm not interested in Sam Evans that way. He's been a great friend but that's all he's been." Mercedes said as her lips formed into a tight line. "I just want to be free. I haven't been single since freshman year."
"Keep telling your self whatever you need to. That boy has his eye on you. I haven't seen him look like that since, well, never." Santana said with a grin. "Cry-Baby doesn't chase skirts. They chase him and the fact that you ain't chasin' is going to set him off sooner than later. Remember that thirsty little bitch Sugar?" Santana laughed as she looked to Quinn.
"Oh god, Mercedes she was so desperate. She came to all of his shows. The final straw was when she threw her panties on the stage and they landed on Santana." She cackled.
"Oh that bitch got cut that night. The only panties I want are attached to Brittany. That bitch had ugly draws too." Santana shuddered and shook it off. "It seems like we're always beating off his hoes. I swear I need to douse that boy in 'hoe-be-gone' maybe they'll leave him alone and leave room for a nice girl to come in."
"Yeah, Sam doesn't like trashy girls. The last girl he dated, Lenora, she was a nice girl. But she burned him bad. He hasn't looked at another girl like he looked at her until you came along." Brittany said with a smile.
"What do you mean? How did she burn him?" Mercedes asked.
"She dug up a few things, used it against him. He'll tell you all about his past when he's ready." Quinn said with a little nod.
"Well at least tell me how he looks at me?" Mercedes asked as she scrunched her nose. She didn't realize she'd changed the subject.
"Like you're a red velvet cupcake with just the right amount of cream cheese icing, Cry-Baby can't say no to dessert." Quinn purred as Puck came up to the girls, flinging his arm around the little blonde. He was careful of her hair, not wanting to mess up the perfect rolls.
"Who can't say no to dessert?" He asked as he smacked his gum.
"Cry-Baby." Quinn said simply.
"Oh yeah, he definitely can't." He said eyeing Mercedes. "Dessert always has him screamin' mercy." The boy said with a smirk as he blew a large pink bubble. Quinn reached up to pop the thing with a giggle before kissing him on the cheek. They really were a cute couple when they weren't at each others throats.
"Whatever, maybe I'll bake him some this weekend. He just lives next door." She said as she rolled her eyes. They all turned to walk towards the cafeteria. Brittany fell into step with them, greeting her girlfriend first.
"So is everyone ready for this weekend?" She asked as she looked around. I'm so excited. The end of the summer is always the most fun!" She squealed.
"Oh yeah, one last time seeing you fine ladies in your swim gear. Ramona's end of the summer Jukebox Jamboree always makes me a little sad." Puck said as he wiped an invisible tear.
"What are you guys talking about?" Mercedes asked as Sam fell into step beside her.
"Y'all were talking about the Jamboree this weekend?" He asked as he threw his arm around Mercedes. Something he'd become accustomed to doing. Mercedes learned that Sam was extremely tactile. He liked to hug, touch, and feel.
"Of course, man. Is Belvedere making those ribs again?" Puck asked with a snort.
"Nah, after he almost set the shop on fire, MawMaw is handling the cooking this weekend. You are coming 'Cedes, right?" He asked looking down at the tiny girl. Something was different about her.
"Well, sure, I mean. What is it?" She asked looking slightly confused.
"We're all going up to Turkey Point. There's a big pig pickin'! There's going to be swimmin'. You'll get to see us play. C'mon 'Cedes, please say you'll come! Come for me, pretty please?" He unwrapped his arm from around her neck and begged. Everyone laughed as they picked up the double entendre.
"Cry-Baby you really need to work on your asking." Mercedes said as she walked past him. "And yeah, I'll come. I'll come just for you." She said with a smirk as he caught up to her and threw his arm around her again. They walked into the cafeteria side by side. It seemed they always garnered stares. For some reason, people liked to stare at The Drapes. Maybe it was the tattoos, maybe it was the jacket. Maybe it was the fact that they looked like Rockabilly trash.
"Why does everyone always stare?" Mercedes asked as she looked around. She was more annoyed than
"Because we're high school hell cats." Sam sung as he looked down at her.
"On our own!" Santana, Quinn, and Brittany sang together in perfect harmony. It impressed Mercedes.
"We love bein' bad" Sam sang again.
"And it sure feels good." Puck sang as they made their way to the lunch line. Mercedes laughed at the Grease moment.
"You guys are insane." She giggled. As they each collected their favorite foods and made their way to the bleachers. The group froze as they saw Mercedes old friends sitting in their spots on the bleachers. This was a dick move.
"Why are you guys here?" Mercedes asked as she handed her tray to Santana. She did it more to keep the girls hands full. Mercedes didn't want to test the theory of her having razorblades in her hair.
"Oh, Mercedes!" Rachel said with mock cheer. "We thought we'd sit somewhere different today. You seem to always have fun here so we thought we'd try it. You don't mind do you?"
"Actually I do mind. Would you please find somewhere else to sit?" She asked as her fist opened and closed. She wasn't pleased.
"No I don't think we'll be moving. But you're welcome to sit somewhere else." Rachel said as she turned to kiss Finn.
"You're a truly pathetic bitch." Quinn and Santana said in unison. "You have to take everything that makes Mercedes happy. Why don't you go sit on the pavilion with the rest of the assholes?" Santana finished.
"Why don't you join us? I'd love to get to know Mercedes' new friends!" Blaine said with cheer. He truly was clueless.
"That's okay Blaine. I'm not ready to make nice. It's just a seat, come on guys we can find somewhere else to go today. Let those petty bitches have it. Its just a seat." Mercedes took her tray from Santana and turned to walk away. She wanted to keep peace for now. She was determined to not let them bait her every time they saw her. She knew what Rachel was like when she got bored and with no one new to destroy she had nothing better to do. The rest of her new friends had a different idea. As she walked away she heard the heated words from the rest of the group.
Sam found Mercedes a few minutes later in am empty orchestra room. She sat on a stool with her bass between her legs. Her eyes closed and her head down as she played. Sam didn't know much about classical music but he knew what she was playing was sad and haunting.
"Hey." He said as he stepped into the room. He didn't want her to stop playing but he wanted to see what was bothering her. He was always drawn to her.
"What's up?" She asked as she looked up.
"Just wanted to make sure you're alright." He said as he walked into the room, his hands in his pockets.
"I'm fine, Sam. It's just sad. They take everything away from me." Mercedes said as she repositioned her bow to begin playing again.
"They can only take what you let them." Sam said as he pulled a stool up to sit next to her. "Play something for me." He said with a smile. Something about Mercedes seemed to brighten.
"Sure, what do you want to hear?" She asked as she put her bow down and stood.
"You know what I like Peach." He said with a grin. Mercedes gave a giggle and used her hands to pluck and slap out a beat. Sam nodded and bobbed his head. He was always amazed at how her tiny hands could create such beautiful and powerful music. He looked around the room and spotted a guitar in the corner. At one time this must have been the band room. She laughed as he played along with her. Together they had a miniature jam session.
"Why did you call me Peach?" She asked as they laughed and played. Sam had to stop and tune the old guitar periodically.
"You're sweet and a little tangy. Plus I like peaches and I like you." He said with a smile as he leaned over to nudge her. She nodded and let out a soft groan as the bell rang. That night after work Sam came home and ran up to his room. Mercedes' window was open and he heard her happy music being carried towards his window. Some how he had a feeling he'd done that for her.
A/N: What did y'all think? Comments, critiques, suggestions? I hope you're enjoying the ride.