A/N I don't own Gravity Falls. Some dialoge is from the episodes. Enjoy.

Chapter 4 - The Stubborn Unicorn.

"No! Stop!" Dipper shouted. He had jumped in front of Bill, helping him up a second later.

"Get away from that demon, boy!" Bill was grinning wickedly, causing Dipper to have a sinking feeling. Bill snapped his fingers, vanishing a moment later. He knew that Bill was still there, watching. Grunkle Stan ran in front of Dipper, blocking his sight.

"STANLEY! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?! The unknown man said, arguing with Grunkle Stan.

"STOP IT! YOU WERE ABOUT TO SHOOT A PRE-TEEN!" Grunkle Stan shouted, punching the other man.

"HE'S CIPHER!" They stopped, staring at each other. The man had lost the scarf around his neck and his goggles. Dipper gasped in surprise. The man looked almost identical to Grunkle Stan. They all stood there in silence, Dipper staring at the man.

"Who are you?" Dipper asked. The man looked at him with a mix of confusion, fear and panic.

"What's going on?!" Mabel screamed, rushing over to them. Soos was standing nearby, looking equality as confused.

"You didn't tell me there were children down here.." The man turned and stared at Mabel and Dipper.

"Ford, they don't know." Grunkle Stan said, addressing the man. Stan wiped blood from his now bleeding nose.

"What have you been telling them, Stanley?!" 'Ford' asked, glaring at him. Dipper looked at Mabel with confusion.

"But your name's Stanford." Mabel said, pointing at Grunkle Stan.

"What?! You took my name?! What have you been doing, you knucklehead?!" He asked, looking at Grunkle Stan. All eyes turned on Grunkle Stan who began to explain.

/(I)\

After a long conversation and an explanation, the group had erased the memory of the agents above, driving them away. Dipper looked over at the man claiming to be the Author of the journal with confusion. They sat around the table in the living room, Soos having left a while ago. There was a mutual silence for a while until Dipper decided to speak up. "How do you know Bill?" He asked, looking at his new Great Uncle Ford.

"I've encountered many things during my time studying Gravity Falls. Why do you ask?" He responded. Dipper looked over at Mabel as she shook her head, knowing what he was going to say.

"No reason."

"You two knuckleheads should get to bed." Grunkle Stan chuckled, getting up. Dipper nodded as he and Mabel left the room, heading upstairs. They got to their room, Mabel flopping on her bed before falling asleep almost instantly. Rather than going to bed, Dipper climbed onto the roof and sat there looking out at the starry sky. He felt conflicted. On one hand, he was excited at the fact that he knew who the Author was but one the other hand he could tell there was a rift between the two old men. And then there was Bill. Why did Great Uncle Ford try to shoot him? Did the two of them have some sort of conflict in the past? Did Bill know this entire time? As Dipper sat there pondering, a smooth hand ruffling his hair. Dipper turned to see Bill sitting there, a hand hovering above his head.

"So, are you going to tell me why you tried to stop me and are you going to tell me why Grunkle Ford tried to shoot you?" Dipper asked, eyeing the demon.

"You ask too many questions." Bill chuckled. Dipper felt frustrated.

"Bill! I'm being serious. Are you going to-" Dipper shouted but was cut off by the tender feeling of Bill's lips against his own. The dream demon pressed forward, kissing the pre-teen. At first, Dipper wanted to pull away but found himself enjoying the sudden advancement. It felt as if all his problems had melted away at this one moment. He continued the kiss until Bill slowly parted. Dipper felt his face flush a deep crimson. Dipper pushed forward, kissing him again. "Why… why did you do that?" Dipper asked, breaking the second kiss as he traced a finger along Bill's face.

"You want answers? You get three questions for free. Firstly, that's a secret I won't tell you yet. Secondly." Bill tapped Dipper's forehead and a stream of information swarmed his mind.

"Y-You were friends. You betrayed him?!" Dipper spluttered out.

"Not exactly, Dipper. I needed a way to get out my burning dimension. Building that portal was the only way. If that didn't happen, what would have been the chances we meet?" He leant closer. "I told you I found you interesting didn't I?" Bill pressed him lips against Dipper's own, Dipper too surprised to react. The pre-teen's defences fell as he goths himself returning the kiss. They unlocked their lips. Dipper looked at Bill, slightly starstruck."It's marvelous that you've got the heavens on your forehead, Pinetree." Bill said, tracing a finger along the birthmark on Dipper's forehead.

"Could I have one last question?" Dipper asked, allowing Bill to hug him. The demon wrapped his arms around Dipper, holding him close.

"That's gonna cost you." He chuckled with a smirk.

"I'm not making a deal with you. Unless it's a good one." Dipper shivered, despite the heat of summer still lingering. He turned to look at the demon in the eyes.

"What if, I'll answer your questions and you don't leave my side?" Bill suggested, tracing a hand across Dipper's birthmark.

"What if, we don't shake hands and it's just a spoken agreement between us?" Dipper commented, leaning against the demon.

"You humans and your dumb verbal contracts. Alright, if it comforts you, Dipper." Bill responded, rolling his eye with a smirk.

"It's a deal," Dipper said softly, pulling the blanket over his body quickly. Bill ruffled the pre-teen's hair, both of them looking at the stars shining in the distance. "Do you... Do you love me?" Dipper asked, lifting his head to look at him. A different emotion flashed on Bill's face, surprise.

"Why would you ask that? Of course, Pinetree." Bill said fondly. Dipper let loose a yawn, raising his hand up to his mouth. Suddenly, Bill picked him up, going through the open window while carrying the pre-teen.

/(I)\

Bill set Dipper down on his bed as he fell asleep, looking at him fondly as he placed a hand over the sheets. His hand just fazed through as if Bill was a ghost. He let loose a sigh. Bill turned to see Stanford in the doorway. Bill raised a finger up to his lips, pointing at the sleeping figure of Dipper. Stanford looked panicked, his gun was raised. "Shh. Sixer. They're sleeping!~" Bill said in a sing-song voice.

"Cipher. What are you doing here? How are you physical?" Ford demanded. Bill laughed, his voice becoming shrill.

"I have my reasons. I'm not completely physical." He showed this by practically phasing through the bed. "You're the brainiac, Sixer. You figure it out. Until next time." Bill bowed before snapping his fingers and vanishing.

/(I)\

Dipper and Mabel sat watching TV while munching on their cereal. "Hey Mabes. Guess what happened last night." He said between cornflakes.

"What bro-bro?" She asked, glancing up from her spot on the floor.

"We kissed." He said, a faint blush on his cheeks. Mabel's eye's lit up, sparkling with joy.

"OH MY GOD! You did it! I'm so proud of you, Dipper!" Mabel squealed, accidently knocking her cereal over onto the ground, spilling the soggy cornflakes and milk into the carpet. Ford rushed in, carrying a bundle of scrolls and paper, a black bag in his left hand. He set it down at the table in the same room before shouting.

"Family meeting! Family meeting!" There was sound of puppies yelping outside and Stan shouting something afterwards. Ford pulled out a book, reading through it as Mabel went up to him. He finally notices them all. "Ah, children. Come in, come in!" He motions for the kids to sit down.

"Ooh, mysterious scrolls and potions! Are you going to tell us we're finally of age to go to wizard school?" She says as she sits down, rummaging through the bag. "Is there an owl in this bag?" Stanford snatches the bag away with slight resentment.

"No! I can assure you if there's an owl in this bag, he's long dead" He snapped, Mabel letting loose a sad sigh. "Now, children, do either of you recognize this symbol?" He showed them a scroll, Dipper instantly recognizing who was on it.

"Bill." He said almost wistfully, Mabel elbowing him in the side.

"Do you know why he's been around the shack in a physical form?" Ford then asked, Dipper's face turning a bright red.

"He's probably trying to get Dipper's body back or something since Bill turned him into a living sock puppet before." Mabel said before her brother could say anything else to reveal the truth.

"The important thing is we defeated him twice." Dipper stated, looking down at his shaking hands.

"Once with kittens and once with tickles!" His sister said, waving her arms around. Dipper let loose a sigh. "It was a lot more heroic than it sounds." He added.

"The fact that you've dealt with Bill is gravely serious. Especially since he's been around here. He was in your bedroom last night, you two were quite lucky he didn't try anything."

"Yeah… lucky." Dipper responded, a hint of bitterness on his voice.

"So, how do you know Bill?" Mabel said, trying to pry information from their grunkle.

"Like I said the first night I arrived here, I've encountered many dark beings in my time. What matters is that his powers are growing stronger, and if he pulls off his plans, no one in this family will be safe!" Mabel let loose a gasp, suddenly clinging to her brother.

"Fortunately, there should be a way to shield us from his mental tricks. A way to Bill-proof the Shack." He pulls the map on the table closer, drawing across it. "All I have to do is place moonstones here, here, and here, sprinkle some mercury, let's see... I always forget the last ingredient!" He took out Journal 1 and flipped through it. "Ugh, unicorn hair."

"That's not, like, rare, is it?" Dipper asked, instantly thinking back to his notes.

"It's hopeless." He looks at the journal in his hands, adjusting his glasses. "Unicorns reside deep within an enchanted glade, and their hairs can only be obtained by a pure good-hearted person who goes on a magical quest to find them."

"They're pretty easy to find if you ask me. I know where they are. They're just a bunch of judgemental hoofbags who don't have boundaries."

"How do you know that?" Ford asked, adjusting his glasses again.

"I've been… exploring… " Dipper gulped out. Mabel didn't seem to notice, rather she had lit up even brighter than she had been before.

"Grunkle Ford, can I please go on this quest? I am literally obsessed with unicorns! My first word was 'unicorn,' I once made my own unicorn by taping a traffic cone to a horse's head. Are you even looking at the sweater I'm wearing right now?! Not to mention that I'm probably the most pure of heart person in this room." Mabel screamed out before pointing at herself. The two males let loose murmurs of agreement, agreeing with Mabel. "So can I go on a mission to get that hair? Please please please? I'LL GIVE YOU MY BLOOD!" She pulled down her sleeve, showing her bare arm as she screamed louder.

"Very well. But it won't be easy." He passed the worn Journal 1 to her. "Take this." he handed Mabel a crossbow. "And this."

"Oooh!"

"I haven't been in this dimension for a while. It's okay to give children weapons, right?" Ford questions, looking at Dipper with slight concern.

"Pssh, come on, dawg." She fires the crossbow through the window, the loud sound of Stan's yelling and off cars screeching following it. Mabel pulls out a phone, instantly dialing up her friends. "Candy, Grenda, Wendy, clear the afternoon!" She shouts, running out of the shack.

"So, what are the odds she gets that hair?" Dipper asked, crossing his arms.

"Unlikely. I've dealt with unicorns before, and if I had to describe them in one word it would be... frustrating."

"Agreed. So, If that plan fails, Grunkle Ford, what do you plan on doing?" He watched his grunkle in curiosity. Part of him wondered if he went through with Ford's plan, would Bill stop seeing him?

"Follow me." He said, entering the gift shop. Dipper turned the open sign to close as the vending machine swung open. They go down the corridor and get into the elevator. Ford pressed the second button, confusing Dipper. When it stopped, he opened the door blocking their way. "Welcome to my private study, a place where I keep my most ancient and secret knowledge. Even your uncle Stan doesn't know about this place." They walk through, Dipper picking up a sheet. "Dipper, come along! If we can't Bill-proof the Shack, we're going to have to do the next best thing." He drops the sheet, looking at the helmet like object in his great uncle's hands. "We're gonna have to Bill-proof our minds." Dipper let loose a gasp. "Sit down." He sat down on a stool, Ford attaching the helmet to Dipper's head.

"So what is Bill, exactly?" Dipper asked, attempting to stir up some conversation.

"No one knows for sure. Accounts differ of his true motivations and origins. I know he's older than our galaxy and far more twisted. Without a physical form, he can only project himself into our thoughts through the mindscape. That's why he wants this." Ford holds up the rift in a six fingered hand. "I dismantled the portal, but with this tear, Bill still has a way into our reality. To get his hands on this rift, he would trick or possess anyone."

"Right… So how do we keep Bill out of our minds?" He said bitterly. It was one lie after another.

"Well, there's a number of ways. I personally had a metal plate installed in my head."

"Heheh. Good one." Dipper chuckled out. Ford tapped his head, a metallic echo following. He coughed, clearing his throat.

"But this machine is safer. It will scan your mind, bioelectrically encrypting your thoughts so that Bill can't read them. Now say hello to your thoughts." Ford flicked the switch on, text appearing on the screen behind Dipper. Dipper paled, seeing his thoughts swarming the screen. 'Oh, man, I can't believe I'm with the author. Is my fly down? Can he tell? DISCO GIRL! COMING THROUGH! I love him. I love him.' "Uh… ignore that last one. By the way, you never told me what your history with Bill was." Dipper choked out, realizing who he was thinking off.

"Dipper, do you trust me?" Ford responded.

"Well, yeah, but-" Dipper began but was cut off by Stanford.

"Then you'll trust that that's not important. Now, focus. It's time to strengthen your mind."

/(I)\

Dipper looked at the screen behind him in dismay as it displayed 'SCANNING THOUGHTS 15%.' Who knew keeping your thoughts from you're demonic boyfriend took so long. He blushed when he saw that thought flicking on the screen, vanishing a second later. "Ugh, this is taking forever. How long have I been doing this for?" Ford was asleep at his desk nearby, letting loose snores. "Why does he have to be so mysterious about Bill? I can handle the truth. Bill's already told me anyway." The screen behind him flashed with more thoughts. 'I wonder what Great Uncle Ford is thinking. Use the machine! It'll show you his thoughts.'

Dipper bit down on his lip. "I shouldn't... "

'He won't know. He's hiding something not even Bill knows. The more you know about it, the more you can help.'

"Man, I am really good at rationalizing." Dipper said to himself, the machine echoing a reply. 'Yes, you are; yes, you are; yes, you are; yes, you are.' He rose from his seat, pulling the helmet off and placing it over Ford's own head. "Just a little peek. What are you hiding?" The same memories which Bill had shared with him the night before played over on the screens. "I knew it. He was right." Ford rose up.

"You shouldn't have done that. " He threw off the helmet, knocking down many curtains, revealing many objects depicting Bill. The helmet smashed into the screen behind Dipper, showering the room in sparks. Dipper stood his ground, knowing full well Bill wouldn't hurt him.

"I'm not scared of you! Even if you were Bill, you wouldn't-" Dipper was caught off guard when Ford grabbed him by his vest. He yelped in surprise, swinging his arms around in an attempt to punch the man holding onto him. "Let go of me!"

"Now-now just calm down. Calm down! I'm not Bill!" Ford lowered him onto the ground.

"Sorry… " Dipper let loose a sigh, sitting back down and burying his face into his hands.

"If I really was Bill, though, you would've done great. I should of been more like you when I was young. Dipper, I was a fool to try to hide all this. The reason I've been trying to prepare you for Bill's tricks is that Bill tricked me. It's the biggest regret of my life. Bill wasn't always my enemy, Dipper. I used to think he was my friend. Long, long ago. I had hit a road block in my investigation of Gravity Falls. Until I found some mysterious writing in a cave. Ancient incantations about a being with answers. It warned me not to read them, but I was desperate. I read the inscription aloud. But nothing happened. Until later that afternoon, when I had the most peculiar dream.

He told me he was a muse. That he chose one brilliant mind a century to inspire. What a fool I was. Blinded by his flattery and games. He became my research assistant. He was free to move in and out of my mind as he pleased. We were partners. When he told me I could complete my research by building a gateway to other worlds, I trusted him. He said this was the way genius happened. Little help from a friend. It seems that I was on the verge of my greatest achievement! Until my partner got a glimpse of Bill's true plans. I'd been betrayed. I shut the portal down, severing the link between Bill's world and ours. I had to hide my instructions so no one could ever finish Bill's work. Bill's been waiting for the gateway to reopen ever since. All he needs to do is get his hands on this rift. To Bill, it's just a game, but to us, it would mean the end of our world." Ford explained, already confirming what Dipper already knew.

"I've just been paranoid, you could say. I've just been dealing with Bill for most of the summer as well. At first, he went into Grunkle Stan's mind after a kid named Gideon made a deal with him. We defeated him but he showed up a bit later after I found a laptop. This whole summer I was obsessed with finding out who the Author of the journals were. Guess that's been answered huh?" He let loose a chuckled, Stanford laughing along with him.

"Anyway, Mabel was busy with her weekly crush so I was stuck figuring this out on my own. I stayed up during the night just to figure it out. One of those nights, Bill showed up in my sleep. Saying he was watching me and was surprised by my efforts. He told me he would help if I would make a deal with him. I said no. Eventually, the laptop was going to reset and I was desperate. He showed up again and said he just wanted a puppet. I agreed. I was so desperate, Grunkle Ford. He smashed the laptop and hijacked my body. I was his puppet and he used my body to try and get your journal. We defeated him though." He explained, mildly proud.

"We cannot let him get to rift. It would spell the end of the world for us." Ford held up the globe filled with swirling cosmos.

/(I)\

"Ugh, I'm so embarrassed about earlier. I'm such an idiot." Dipper grumbled, lowering himself further into his lies. Ford opened a can of Pitt Cola for him, pushing it forward.

"From now on, no more secrets between us. We're not the first two idiots to be tricked by Bill, boy. But if we work together, we could be the last." Dipper nodded, knowly full well it was another one of his white lies.

"But what about Bill? We broke the machine! Now we have no way to protect the shack!"

Mabel slammed a fist down onto the table, bunches of rainbow coloured hair sprouting out from it's grasp. " Did someone say "unicorn hair"?!" She shouted.

"Uh, no, actually?" Dipper groaned, taking a sip from his drink.

"Oh. That would have been perfect. Either way we got some unicorn hair!" She exclaimed, waving the locks in his face with a wide grin. All the girls were spotting bruises, covered in rainbow coloured bodily fluids.

"Also some unicorn tears, unicorn eyelashes… " Candy said, holding out a dripping arm.

"They finally gave us this treasure just to get rid of us!" Grenda shouted, dumping a large chest of gold onto the table.

"It... can't be! This is a great day, girls! With this unicorn hair, we should be able to completely shield the shack from Bill's mind-reading tricks!" Ford said, overjoyed as he picked up a handful of coins and looked at them.

"Is it okay?"

"Better than okay; it's perfect! You've protected your family. You're a good person, Mabel." The old man spoke after becoming level with Mabel.

"Thanks, Grunkle Ford, but today I learned that morality is relative." She stated, placing her hands on her hips. Suddenly, Stan runs past, grabbing a handful of the treasure.

"MONEY!" He shouted as he ran away.