Hey again! Did you like the last chapter? I did a live preview of this story…I don't know why the lyrics aren't coming out italicized! I think I'll underline them as well…Underlining seems to work better than italicizing.

Sorry for the mixup! With love, here is the fourth chapter of:

Serious

EPOV

It was a few hours later that I went downstairs, Alice shooing me out of the room to conference with Bella. She had been blocking her thoughts, but I wasn't sure I wanted to know when I heard roars of fury and maniacal laughter echoing from our room.

I sat down at their piano and began to play. It was a new piece I was working on, lively and cheerful, inspired by Bella (of course.). I planned it to me lengthy, so it kept me there for the evening as Alice held Bella captive. I wished she wouldn't do that; knowing that Bella was in the house but I couldn't see her was torturous.

Anyway, after a while, Alice came downstairs (completely Bella-less) and gave me instructions for a plan she was concocting with Bella. Apparently it was to foil Tanya's plan. The instructions were peculiar, to say the least…but it would most definitely be entertaining.

So if I'm crazy hope you understand

Hurry doctor come, need to give me some

You know what time it is

BPOV

I was sitting upstairs in mine and Edward's room, suppressing a cackle every now and then at Alice's genius plan. But still, of course, I couldn't repress the reactionary snarl when I heard the whore's breathy voice talking to my husband.

"Hello, Edward," She said to him, obviously trying to be sexy. Judging by how his lively piano composure changed to Chopin's funeral march, I'd say it didn't work. "I was wondering if you'd like to go out with me tonight, to a nice place I know."

Although I knew it was all part of the plan, it still burned a little when he said, "Actually, Tanya, I'd love to." I could tell by his voice's undertone that the words sickened him. He sounded immediately more cheerful as he called, "Bella, love! We've been invited on an outing!"

Tanya's angry screech filled the house. "Edward! I invited you, not her!"

His innocently confused voice answered, "But why would I go out somewhere without Bella? You couldn't possibly have meant it would only be you and I…that would be ludicrous."

"That's exactly what I meant!" She was hissing like an angry cat.

"But what would we do?" He paused, mock-thoughtful. "I suppose we could find you a mate."

"UGH!" She stomped up the stairs, leaving a chuckling Edward. She barged into my room and I made a face at how little she was wearing. "DON'T THINK THAT BECAUSE YOU'RE COMING I WON'T! HE'S MINE!" She ran out in a fury as I laughed. We'll see about that.

I think I'm coming down with somethingI know it gonna need your medicineSo help me now, I'm freakin out, lover

Alice danced around me, looking feverish with excitement (hey, she managed it).

"Time for Part 2!" she sang, pushing me into the bathroom. I sighed, bracing myself for Alice's special form of torture.

EPOV

I paced downstairs next to the piano, wanting to see Bella. We had another hour until we were scheduled to go out. I was just cursing Alice for the 432nd time when a loud shriek tore through the house.

I could tell it wasn't Bella, but I ran upstairs all the same. Tanya was incoherent with rage.

"You-you-you-" She aimed a shaking finger at what I assumed to be Bella, the partly closed door was blocking my vision. Alice shoved me out the door as I was about to go in, screaming at me in her head.

You can't see her yet! She slammed the door in my face. Don't worry, she can handle it.

Alice then stationed herself behind the door so I couldn't enter. The only way would be to break the door, but that was a last resort and she knew it.

"YOU BITCH!" Tanya was still screaming. I growled through the door. "HOW DARE YOU FUCK UP MY COMPUTER! YOU HAD NO RIGHT—DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG THOSE TOOK ME?"

"First of all," Bella replied coolly. "I don't believe upgrading your computer was "fucking it up," as you so eloquently put it. It's not my fault some files were erased. Second of all," her voice turned furious. "I don't think you have any right in fabricating those pictures!"

What? What pictures?

"It's not as though I'm going to lose, so why not take a little shortcut?" Tanya snarled.

"Maybe because it's a LIE!" Bella retorted. "Not to mention it would hurt Jasper, Alice, Edward, and I!"

What was going on?

I attempted to break down the door, but Alice was still on the other side of the door.

"Well, just because you ruined my hard work doesn't mean he's going to choose you!"

"You're kidding me, right?" Bella snorted. "He already has. Now get out of my sight before I burn off those fake, cheesy knockoffs of yours,"

Get out of the way, Edward, Alice thought to me. I sprang away just in time.

Tanya was so angry she didn't even look at me. Alice had shut the door before I could do anything, so I called through it to them.

"Alice!" I groaned. "What happened?"

Shut up, Edward. I'll tell you later. She trilled in her head. A flash of images lighted her head. No, wait, Bella will.

I dragged myself back downstairs, wondering why females always take so much longer to get dressed. I returned to the piano, which was recently becoming less of an adequate pastime. Time spent without Bella was time wasted.

It was within ten minutes of our departure that Alice finally released my wife. And suddenly all that lost time was completely worth it.

She was stunning.

Bella wore a black velvet and silk dress, catching the light and muting it in all the right places. There were no straps, just the corset-like top. The front had silk ribbons crossing over velvet while the back had silk ribbons crossing over bare, white skin. There was a slit that went up to her knee, provocative, but not slutty.

Slutty would be the word I chose for what tripped down the stairs behind her. From the fleeting glance I spared her, I caught a lot of skin and racy, see-through material. I quickly soothed my burning eyes on Bella.

Partly to annoy Tanya and partly because I couldn't resist, I pulled Bella into my arms and kissed her, long and hard.

Tanya stomped out as Bella and I laughed. I put my arm around Bella's waist and guided her outside, ready to face what was sure to be and eventful evening.

Sorry, not much happened in this chapter…it will all be revealed in the next chapter…well, mostly. Anyway, my mother's screeching at me now, so the next chapter will have to wait. (until either tomorrow or Monday) Do you want it? Do you really want it? THEN REVIEW! And also vote. I love you all! There will be two more chapters. See you later, honey babies!