Porthos shifted uncomfortably in the saddle. What a ball ache it was, hot, tedious and slow; they'd only just left Paris and already he missed the city. If only Aramis were beside him to make one of his terrible jokes or to distract him with one of his wild stories. Porthos frowned, no! He refused to miss him – Aramis had made his bed and now he could lie in it. He was still scowling when Athos rode up beside him.
"Is something the matter?"
"No" Came the surly response, from behind them laughter erupted from D'Artagnan and Porthos's scowl deepened, clearly the Pup must be laughing at some witty remark from Aramis.
"They seem happy" Porthos huffed not even looking over his shoulder at the younger musketeers.
"Shouldn't they be?"
Porthos shot Athos a quick look before looking away, not sure of how to answer that.
The Captain sighed.
"Porthos" Athos hoped to broach the subject gently but much like D'Artagnan he wasn't the best at not jumping to the heart of the matter. "Aramis made a mistake"
"He told you then?"
Athos nodded.
"That doesn't surprise me – never could keep a secret, unless it's from me of course"
Grey eyes widened slightly at the vehemence in that tone, "Is that how you really feel?"
Porthos sighed and was about to answer that's exactly how he felt but then his broad shoulders sagged, "No … but why did he have to do it Athos. And with her? I told him, I bloody told him she ain't a woman she's the queen" he lowered his voice even further, "its treason – if anyone were to find out then he'll be hung."
"I know"
"But why'd he do it" Porthos continued much as Athos knew he would, "wasn't I enough for him?"
Athos sighed, "I don't think it's a question of whether you were enough for him, you have always been and most assuredly always will be more than enough for Aramis, but I think in this instance it was a case of if he was enough for you"
"Eh?"
"What Aramis did was wrong and I don't condone his actions, but the situation between you was different then, less certain. I strongly believe that had Aramis known you returned his feelings then he would have never laid with the queen. But at the time he was hurting – he had just lost Isabelle"
"Another old love he never told me about"
Athos continued as though he hadn't heard, "And you know how he hates to sleep alone especially when he's upset, ever since- "
"Savoy" Both men winced at the word alone, so many good men dead and how easily Aramis could have been amongst them.
A moment of silence stretched out between them as both men rode along together, each lost in their own thoughts, until Porthos heaved a resigned sigh.
"I'm just so angry with him … and disappointed"
Athos nodded, "that is understandable mon ami" the Captain considered his friend for a moment, "do you think you can forgive him?"
"I don't know…"
"Do you still love him?"
"Of course!"
"Then ask yourself this Porthos, if you continue down this road then what do you want the outcome to be? If you love Aramis and Aramis loves you then perhaps you should talk to him … what Aramis did was incredibly stupid and his actions are deserving of your anger but ultimately what is more important to you, your pride or your relationship?"
Porthos did not answer but he looked on his brother and smiled, nodding his head which elicited a half smile from Athos he leant across to clap his shoulder fondly.
Now that the horses were warmed up it was time to pick up the pace and with a quick call over his shoulder and a flick of his wrist Athos led the others in a steady canter, the sound of numerous hooves beating across the earth like thunder.