It was almost midnight and Mimi went up the fire escape to Roger's apartment. She knew that the right move was probably to wait for him to look for her. But she wasn't much a girl of right moves. And she just couldn't stop thinking about him. After he had opened up and told her about his disease, his dead girlfriend and everything that he's been through these past months, her attraction for him just grew stronger. She told him many things about her, too. About her father and about how her life as a stripper was a way up from several bad things she's been through.
One thing she left out. Well, not left out since it wasn't actually a thing to worry about. After he told her about his withdraw period she felt it was unnecessary to tell him she was dying for a shot. She thought she could wait a while longer, but in the morning she began to feel really bad. After the shot she took before work, she felt better, and all she wanted was to be with him, talk, kiss, and make love to him again.
He was sitting in the couch with his guitar, looking serious and sad.
"Hi" she said.
He looked at her taken by surprised and smiled sadly. "Oh, Hi."
Not exactly the reception she was waiting for.
"You know, I almost couldn't work today." she said, walking in and crawling in the couch until she was facing him really closely. He didn't say anything; just looked away a little embarrassed then looked back at her. "You know why?"
"Why?" he said not smiling anymore, looking straight into her eyes.
"Cause my legs got shaky every time I remembered what you did to me last night." She whispered and leaned to kiss him. He hesitated for a moment then he kissed her back.
He put his guitar down and pulled her to his lap, kissing her with more intensity and urgency, and she felt a rush of happiness. Almost as good as the rush from the shot.
They made out for a long while, until he broke the kiss and just stared at her seriously. She smiled widely running her hands through his hair. "Want to go downstairs?" she invited.
He just looked at her thoughtfully. She saw sadness and maybe some doubt in his eyes and felt unsure. An uncontrollable fear of being blown off again made her body tense and her smile subside.
"Why are you so serious?" she said, running her hands through his chest. "Thinking too much again?" She said with a sassy smile kissing him.
He let himself be kissed then hugged her, pressing his head against her chest. She held him tight. "What's wrong?" she asked carefully, scared of the possible answer.
He leaned back and ran his hand through her hair. "You're very beautiful." he said, smiling again. "It's impossible to resist you." he said.
She smiled although she knew he was dodging her question.
"I couldn't stop thinking about last night either." he said picking her up and laying her in the couch kissing her deeply. "My room is closer." He said, with a wicked smiled.
Her body felt warm and soft under the sheets, wrapped in his arms. She was sleeping soundly and the slow beating of her heart soothed him. The intense happiness he was feeling scared him. His rational mind insisted it was too soon to feel that intensely about someone he barely knew.
Her arm was over his chest and he could see the needle marks. That made him remember April and all the bad feelings and thoughts that came with her memory. He also remembered his own addiction. The craving for a shot was a ghost whispering in the back of his skull. He knew it wasn't real, that his body didn't need anything anymore; he's been off for a long time now. But he feared the proximity of the stuff would cause a relapse.
He shoved those thoughts aside and concentrated on the warmth of her body and her heartbeat to guide him to sleep.