Touche'
By phillydi
Chapter 4
Kensi finds the stool next to Jack and drops onto it. She can't trust her legs to hold her up any longer.
"So are you going to introduce us?" Deeks asks impatiently. His eyes shift between Kensi and Jack.
"Ah….yes, Jack, this is ….Tim, my friend Tim." Kensi looks like she's just seen a ghost.
"Yes, that's me, good ol' Tim," Deeks shakes Jack's hand and gives Kensi a scathing look.
"Jack and I knew each other a long time a-ago," Kensi stammers. She's so traumatized right now; she just wants the ground to open up and swallow her whole.
"What's going on over there? You two alright?" Callen's voice fills their head sets.
Deeks is grateful for the diversion and a chance to leave the awkward situation.
"Will you excuse me? You two probably have some catching up to do. I'll be back." Deeks reluctantly leaves the couple behind to respond to Callen's call.
"Callen, it's Deeks. You're not going to believe this but your suspect turns out to be Kensi's long lost fiancé – Jack." Deeks pushes his way through the wedding guests.
"You're kidding me?" Callen is incredulous. "What the hell's he doing here?"
"I guess we'll find out. I left the two of them back there reliving fond memories."
"You think that's a good idea? She may have killed him by now – not to mention breaking her cover."
"Yeah, well I didn't have much of a choice." Deeks joins Callen next to the dessert table.
"Sam are you getting all this?" Callen asks.
"Yeah, it sounds like an episode of All My Children," Sam teases.
"Why don't you get over to the bar and find out if Kensi is ok? See if we can clear this guy," Callen responds.
"Heading there now."
Callen notices Deeks is uncharacteristically riled up as if someone just stole the brass ring from under his nose. This can't be good. He knows there is something going on between Kensi and Deeks. But was it a friendship bordering on a relationship or something more?
"We still have work to do here Deeks, let's resume our watch."
Deeks regains some of his composure and continues surveillance but he keeps replaying the scene between Kensi and Jack. Every so often he looks over at the bar but the last time he scans the room -she's gone.
"Anyone know where Kensi is? She's not at the bar."
"Yeah, she's out on the balcony with Jack," Sam responds. "She says she's ok, but I'll keep an eye out on her."
Kensi and Jack walk over to the balcony railing. The cool evening air helps steady her breathing. Kensi doesn't know where to begin with Jack. Does she hug him, kiss him, or pull out her gun and shoot him? She swore she was so over this man but with one look the memories, good and bad, come flooding back into her consciousness.
Jack could read her thoughts. "I'm so sorry Kens, please don't hate me," pleaded Jack.
"I searched all over for you Jack but I couldn't find you!"
"That's because I didn't want to be found. I was no good for you or anyone else back then. It killed me to see what I was doing to you, day in, and day out. I just couldn't let you go through that anymore."
"Really Jack? Don't you think you should have let me make that decision? No, you just walked out and left me alone and scared out of my mind that something terrible had happen to you."
Kensi paced back and forth in front of Jack. "Do you know how long it took me to get over the feelings of abandonment and hurt? Do you know I blamed myself because I felt it was my fault that I didn't try hard enough or listen long enough?" Kensi gasped for air, willing herself not to cry.
Jack lowers his head and lets the silence settle between them.
Kensi finally finds the courage to continue.
"I loved you Jack, and I promised I would never leave you. How could you do that to me?"
"You loved the old Jack. You didn't bargain for the new one who returned from Fallujah. I was a broken man back then Kensi. When the MPs finally found me I was strung-out, lying under a pier in San Diego incoherent and half dead. They sent me to Walter Reed in DC and I spent a year in a psych ward. Half the time I didn't even know my name let alone who I was.
Kensi listens intensely but her stomach is turning.
"You deserved more Kensi. I didn't even know if I would ever recover from the horror I witnessed in Iraq. I'm here by the grace of God and a couple of dedicated doctors who pulled me through that nightmare."
Jack swallows slowly and continues with his story. "I was discharged from the Marines after I got out of the hospital. I was living on disability checks and trying to find a job. I ran into an old childhood friend before I left Reed. He's a doctor in the Marines stationed at Camp Pendleton now – Danny Morton. Do you know him?"
"You mean the groom?"
"Yeah, that's how I got invited to the wedding. We hooked up again and renewed our friendship in DC. He was even able to help me find a job working there with a military contractor. I help run a small metal works company that supplies parts for military vehicles. I flew out here for the wedding but I'm still a bit jumpy. I have problems acclimating myself to crowds and loud noises. Kind of makes me nervous. Flying out here was a big deal for me."
"Jeez," Kensi holds her hand over her forehead. She looks around the balcony debating how to ask the next question.
"Did you ever think of me during the past six years?" Her voice softened. "Ever?"
"When I got through that first year in the psych ward, I started to dream of possibly finding my way back to a normal life again – whatever that means. I thought about our life together before that deployment…but I knew it could never be like that again. I had to let you go. But seeing you now, here in front of me, I'm thinking I may have made a very big mistake. I'm just hoping that life has been good to you Kens because that's all I've ever wanted."
Kensi shook her head trying to digest everything Jack had gone through since they parted.
"Tell me there's a fairy tale ending Kensi. Are you happy? What are you doing now?" He leaned in closer to Kensi.
"Oh, you know, a little of this, a little of that," Kensi hedged, not wanting to blow her cover in case it was still needed. Jack knew nothing about her time at NCIS.
"How about Tim? You two an item?"
"Tim? Oh no, no. He's just a friend I see sometimes. He invited me to the wedding."
"Good, glad there's nothing serious between you too. I wasn't too keen on how he was yelling at you back there."
Kensi's eyes raged in anger. "You don't have a say about things like that anymore, Jack! You left me remember?"
Silence.
"Sorry, I didn't mean that."
"That's ok, I deserved it."
Kensi starts to turn away from Jack but stops.
"I'd like to say it was great seeing you again Jack, but to tell you the truth, I don't know what I think. I was hoping some day you'd come looking for me….but eventually I knew that was never going to happen….and now here you are again."
"It doesn't have to be that way Kens. Listen, I'm going to be in LA for a few days – can I see you again? Please?"
"I don't know Jack."
"Remember the Starbucks we use to hang out at West Pico and Robertson? Meet me there tomorrow at noon. Just coffee and small talk. I promise." Jack crosses his heart and raises the palm of his hand.
Kensi bites her bottom lip and backs away debating what answer to give Jack. It was like six year had never passed. He was still as handsome and persuasive as ever.
"I'll try, but I can't promise."
"I'll see you there," Jack says confidently.
Deeks watches Kensi reenter the ballroom. She had turned her head set off when she went out on the balcony with Jack. He doesn't know what to expect when she returns. He meets her near the dance floor.
"Are you ok?" he asks with concern.
"Sure why wouldn't I be," snaps Kensi.
"Oh, I don't know, maybe it's because your long lost fiancé shows up out of the blue and you just happen to fall into his lap and I mean that literally."
"Look Deeks, I'm ok," Kensi waves her hand. "It was a long time ago and I'm over it." She walks away from Deeks and heads to the kitchen to find Callen.
Deeks doesn't move.
"Now why don't I believe that?" He wonders out loud.
You guys have all been so great supporting me in my first multi-chapter fan fic. I can't say thanks enough for all the encouragement and kind words…