He called once a week, sometimes more; sometimes they talked for hours, other times it was a quick hello, but he never failed to call.

When he came home for Christmas holiday, he was the same and yet not. New friends, new places, full of stories filled with people and places she'd never been; he was more confident, more assured. Less the boy she had known and more the man she knew he would become.

But just like old times, he still came in through her window, landing on his bum with a thud.

"I take it you haven't been sneaking in any windows lately," she quipped, scooting over in the bed to make room for him.

"You saying I'm clumsy?" he replied, laying down next to her.

"No. Implying, yes." She grinned. "So how's Jack?" Rose had talked to Jack on the phone many times, he was funny and charming and a shameless flirt.

"He's…Jack." John pulled his phone out and found a picture of his roommate, his arm around Donna. "I'd kill him if I didn't like him so much."

"He's handsome." Rose grinned at him. "Bet he's quite the ladies man."

"Men, women, he'll stick it in anything with a willing orifice." Rose smacked him, and he shouted. "Oi! It's true! I can't tell you how many times I've found a stranger in the kitchen, making themselves tea in the altogether. It's quite…unnerving."

"Does Donna like him?"

"Of course she does, look at him!"

Rose began flipping through the pictures. "Who's this?" she asked, pointing to a dark-haired girl.

"Christina. Jack and her roommate…well, I wouldn't say they are dating, it's more like shagging whenever the mood strikes. Which is apparently fairly often."

"Ah." She scrolled through pictures of Donna, of Jack with various people, and one of John sprawled on a sofa with marker on his face. "I like the marker, it works for you."

"And that was the last time I let Jack make the drinks." He closed his phone and slipped it back in his pocket. "How have you been?"

"Fine. Got into uni, will be there with you and Donna next year."

"Brilliant!" he grinned at her. "You and Donna should share a flat, her roommate now is a right cow."

"She wouldn't want to live with me, a lowly fresher."

"Oi! Not so lowly."

"Next year you lot won't even talk to me, be embarrassed to be seen with a first-year."

"Never." He nudged her playfully. "Besides, my roommate is besotted with you. He'll be following you around like a lovesick puppy."

"Yes, so besotted he'll shag anything." She grinned at him. "You should bring him home for a weekend, let me meet this Jack Harkness in person."

"So I can sneak in through your window and find him in your knickers?"

"A girl's got needs. Or did you mean him wearing my knickers? Because that is one thing I am not into."

John made a disgusted face. "Thank you for that lovely mental image."

"Just wanted to clarify."

"Although, for the record, if you asked him to wear your knickers he probably would." John shook his head. "Honestly, Rose, I don't know how he hasn't failed out yet. He never goes to lectures, I have never seen him open a book…he's either a genius or sleeping with someone important."

"Or both."

They lapsed into silence, and when John looked over at her she was asleep. He moved to go, but her hand reached out. "'S late, just stay."

John paused, heart thumping hard in his chest. He missed her, missed her easy smile and her big, generous heart. He'd never met a girl who was as kind or as honest as Rose or who could make his heart race simply by holding his hand. The way he felt about her terrified and confused him. She was his best friend, he shouldn't want to touch her and kiss her.

That didn't stop him from wanting her. And he did want her, so much that it terrified him.

He knew he should leave, but one look at her sleeping face and his resolve crumbled. Toeing off his shoes, he settled back on the pillow and drifted into sleep.

Rose's phone trilled on the evening of Christmas Eve, just late enough so that she knew it could be only one person. A glance at her phone confirmed her suspicion, and she tugged on her trainers and coat.

"Goin' next door for a bit," she said to her mother, who was wrapping presents at the dining table.

"Ask Sylvia if I can borrow a pie plate, would you?" Jackie asked without looking up. "I've got another pie to make for tomorrow and I can't find my other one."

"Sure, Mum."

"And don't be too late, Cousin Mo wants us there before 10."

"I know."

She ducked through the hole in the fence and found Wilf with his telescope. Upon hearing her footsteps, he looked over at her and smiled.

"There's our girl."

"Hi, Wilf." She leaned in and placed a kiss on his cheek. "How's the view tonight?"

"None too bad, but not near as nice as the pretty girl standing next to me." Rose blushed. "You goin' inside to see himself, then?"

"Yeah, gotta be quick though, Mum's on the warpath. Sylvia around? Mum wants to borrow a pie plate for tomorrow."

"In the kitchen, love. Go on in."

When Rose opened the back door, Sylvia looked up. "Hello, Rose."

"Hi, Sylvia. Mum wants to know if she can borrow a pie plate."

"I should have another one around here somewhere. Give me a minute."

Rose smiled. "No rush, I'm here to give John his present." She tossed her coat over the back of a chair and, present in hand, went up the stairs to John's room.

She found him lounging on the bed, phone in hand and texting madly. "Oi, took you long enough," he said, scooting over on the bed to make room for her.

"Shut up." She tossed a small parcel at him, gaily wrapped in green and red paper.

Grinning, he tossed the phone on the bed and ripped into the package, his face lighting up as he pulled the old pocket watch out of it's box. "You trying to tell me something?"

"Yes, that you're always late." She smiled. "I remember you said your dad had one, but it got lost after he..." Rose let the sentence trail off awkwardly, knowing he didn't like to talk about his father's death. "It's not got a battery, you'll have to wind it for it to work, but I took it to a jeweler and he said it's in great condition. He offered me 200 quid for it but I refused."

"I certainly hope you won't be disappointed, your gift is not nearly as nice." He rummaged through his bedside table and pulled out a small, unwrapped box. "Sorry it's not wrapped."

Rose opened the box to find two ivory hair combs with pink and yellow roses intricately carved into them. "They're lovely!"

"They reminded me of you." All pink and yellow, he longed to say, the color of your hair, the color of your cheeks after a good laugh, the color of your bikini when you were fifteen and I got a knob-on just looking at you. He swallowed thickly, wishing he weren't such a coward.

Smiling, she went over to his mirror and put the combs in her hair. "What do you think?" she asked turning to face him.

"They look like they were made for you." He stood up and walked over to her, pulling her into a hug. "Happy Christmas."

"You too." Rose looked up at him, and when their eyes met, Rose could have sworn that time slowed down, that she could feel the turn of the Earth as he bent his head and pressed his mouth to hers.

Rose had kissed plenty of guys in the years since John had given her her first kiss, but none of them had ever made her feel like this; dizzy with want, warmth spreading through her body, and when his tongue swept into her mouth, she swore she saw stars.

John pulled back and looked at her, breathing slightly labored. His eyes were dark with desire, his lips pink and sparkly with her lip gloss and before she could even process what had just happened his mouth was on hers again, this time with more urgency.

Instinctively, Rose put her arms around his neck and threaded her fingers into his hair. Spurred on by her actions, one of his hands found its way under the back of her jumper to the soft skin of her back as they moved towards his bed. When Rose's knees hit the bed she sat down and scooted up towards the head, his mouth never leaving hers.

John braced himself above her on one arm as he kissed her, his other hand moving from the soft skin of her back to the softer skin of her stomach. As their kiss intensified, his hand moved up to her breast, pinching her nipple through the satin and making her moan.

The trill of a phone was like a claxon in the quiet room, and they sprung apart, breathing heavily. Rose fumbled in her jeans pocket until she found the phone, and she looked at it with a frown. "Mum. Needs the pie plate."

"Ah." John sat up and ran a hand through his hair, moving off the bed.

Tucking her phone away, she smoothed the fabric of her jumper and swung her legs over the side of the bed. They stared at each other for a moment, neither quite knowing what to say. Rose's phone trilled again, and she rolled her eyes as she stood up. "See you tomorrow, yeah?"

"Yeah." His voice was hoarse, and he looked away, picking up his phone.

Heart still pounding, Rose gathered her jacket and the pie plate Sylvia had left for her and headed out the back door, although she would have sworn her feet never touched the ground.

Rose and Donna sat on the comfy old couch in the basement, curled up under a blanket together as they watched telly. John sat on the floor in front of them, phone in hand. When it rang he sprang up and headed to the laundry room, answering the phone in a hushed voice.

"What's all that about?" Rose asked Donna.

"Probably one of his many paramours," Donna replied with an exaggerated eyeroll. "How that skinny streak of nothing gets so many women is beyond me."

Rose felt like a block of ice had settled in her stomach. "He...has lots of girlfriends?"

"Nah, he just gets lots of numbers whenever we go out. Doesn't go looking for them, but the women seem to love him." Donna looked over at her friend and noticed that Rose had gone pale. "You okay?"

"He snogged me."

Donna had the urge to beat her brother about the head with a heavy, blunt object. Instead, she tried to assuage Rose's worries. "You're the only one he ever calls back," she said. "The others get a date, maybe two."

Rose sighed and lay her head on Donna's shoulder. "I know, it's stupid. It's not like we're anything other than mates, yeah?"

"He's thick, Rose, you know that. Gigantic dumbo, that's him." Donna lay her head on top of Rose's and took her hand. "Just forget about it, yeah? Temporary insanity brought about by having to be around my mother for two whole weeks."

Rose chuckled sadly. "Yeah."

When John returned, his sister shot him a look that struck fear into his heart and refused to speak to him until they were on their way home. It was only once they were in their own yard that Donna deigned to speak to him, prefacing it with a resounding slap on the back of his head.

"You. Arsehole."

"What the hell was that for?" he asked angrily. "If you're gonna give me a smack, I'd like to know why first!"

"You know damn well why I thumped you, and I'll give you more than a thumping if you hurt her." Donna's eyes were narrow and her voice hard. "You might have girls falling all over you at uni, but Rose isn't one of those slags. Does she know about Renee?"

At the mention of his girlfriend's name, he had the grace to at least look sorry. "No."

"You wanker! You absolute wanker!" Donna raised her hand to thump him again, and he raised his arms in self-defense. "She loves you! She's your best friend! And you treat her like she's one of the slags who hit on you in pubs!"

"Donna-"

"Don't you 'Donna' me, you stupid tosser!" Donna stepped forward so that they were standing nose to nose. "You tell her or I will. You have until first of January, and I mean the minute the clock strikes midnight, or I will tell her. And then I will help her remove your reproductive organs with a rusty spoon. Am I clear?"

"Fine." John sighed. "Look, I just...I'm scared, okay?"

"Scared? Of what?"

"Her! This!" Groaning in frustration, he ran his hand through his hair. "I like her, Donna, in a way that I think I probably shouldn't."

"Why shouldn't you?"

"Because she's my best mate! Because we took baths together when we were three, and because she knows I slept with a nightlight until I was ten, and because she's Rose, she's the girl next door and that whole girl-next-door thing is cliché and never works out."

Realization dawned in Donna's eyes. "You love her. You love her and it scares you to death." She smacked him again, this time on the arm. "If you love Rose, why are you with Renee?"

"I like her, too!" John growled in frustration. "I like Renee. She's beautiful and she's smart and funny and I like spending time with her. I'm not trying to lead her on. I just...I want to make sure that what I feel for Rose isn't just my hormones or because she's convenient. Maybe eventually I'll feel this way about Renee? Maybe I won't feel this way about Rose in a year. I'll never know if I don't go out there and try." He heaved a sigh. "I know I've screwed up royally."

Donna sighed. "Well, you've made a right mess of this. But you tell her, you tell Rose about Renee, or I will."

"You're such a girl!" Rose said, sitting on John's bed while he primped and preened in front of the mirror for New Year's Eve down at the pub. Her phone dinged with a text message, and she read it with a grin. "Donna says to hurry up, she won't save you a seat at the pub much longer."

"You tell her to shut her piehole."

John's phone dinged, and Rose grabbed it off the table, expecting the message to be from Donna. She opened the message to find it wasn't Donna's image that popped up next to the message, but the image of John and a very attractive blonde woman, in what appeared to be a bed. She scanned the message.

"My bed is lonely without you, my angel."

Rose swore that her heart stopped. Taking a deep breath, she closed the message and tossed the phone on the bed, willing herself not to cry until she was alone.

"What's Donna want now?" John asked, then noticed Rose looking wan. "You okay?"

"No." Rose stood abruptly. "I'm suddenly not feeling well, I think I'm going to just go home."

She moved to leave, but John grabbed her arm. "Hey now, something's the matter. Tell me."

"Just feeling sick." Rose forced herself to give him a smile. "Sorry. Tell Donna to call me tomorrow, yeah?"

He knew she was lying, she could tell from the look in his eyes. "Yeah."

Rose managed to make it to her bedroom before she broke down in angry, humiliated tears. In a fit of anger she threw her coat across the room, hating him but hating herself just a little bit more.

"I'm so stupid!" she cried, curling up on her bed. "Stupid, stupid!"

She had just begun to calm down when there was a knock on the door. Donna poked her head in and sighed before coming to sit next to Rose on the bed.

"If it's any consolation, I'm pretty sure I smacked him so hard that he'll be seeing double for a month." Donna brushed Rose's hair off her face. "He's a tosser, Rose, a total wanker and he's not good enough for you."

Rose sniffled again. "I'm so stupid, Donna. I didn't think he'd be a monk, but I mean...he didn't even tell me! We talk every day, and he never mentioned her!"

Donna pulled Rose up and put her hands on either side of Rose's face. "You listen to me, you're not stupid. This is his fault for not telling you about that horrible girl. And she is horrible, she's nowhere near as wonderful as you."

"If she's so awful, how come he's with her?"

"Because he's thinking with his dick." Donna sighed and hugged her friend. "He's not worth it, Rose. No matter how long you've been friends, no matter how close you are, what he did was horrible and you deserve better."

Rose nodded. "Yeah."

"Atta girl." Donna smiled at her. "You gonna be okay? I can ditch them if you want, we can stay in and watch movies."

Rose smiled, a genuine smile. "No, Donna, I'll be fine. You go have fun."

"You sure? I don't mind."

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"Okay, but if you need anything, you call me. Okay?"

Rose nodded. "Yeah."

She heard the door close behind Donna, and with a sigh got up and went to sit in front of her vanity. She sat for a moment, studying her reflection in the mirror before looking down at the envelopes in front of her.

She had been planning on starting university at the same school as John and Donna, and had only applied to school in Cardiff on a whim. But considering what had just happened, the idea of being far away from him had a certain appeal. She wouldn't have to worry about seeing him with that girl, running into him at pubs and the student center or on the Tube. She could start all over, where nobody knew her, where nothing could remind her of him.

Donna was right, she did deserve better. And maybe the only way to figure out just what 'better' meant was to get some space.

The knock on the front door startled Rose out of her telly-induced stupor, and when she opened the door she was glassy-eyed and not expecting to find John standing there, looking as though someone had kicked his dog.

"Hi."

"Hello." Rose was polite but not friendly, and she did not invite him inside. "Can I help you?"

John ran his hand through his hair. "You aren't answering your phone."

"No, I am."

It took a moment for her meaning to set in, and when it did he sighed. "I'm sorry, Rose. I am. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Well, you did. Anything else, or are we done here?"

"Please don't shut me out." He ran a hand through his hair in a nervous gesture Rose recognized. "I was a right twat, and I'm sorry. I wouldn't blame you if you hated me, but you'll never hate me more than I do."

Rose sighed. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Honestly? I have no idea. It's not like it was a secret I was deliberately keeping from you, it just...never came up."

"And why did you kiss me?"

"I just...because you're you, you're my best friend who is beautiful and kind and...it felt right. " John sighed again. "Are we okay? I don't know that I could stand it if I lost you as a friend."

"I don't know." Rose took a deep breath, willing herself not to cry. "I feel like you lied to me. If I'd known you had a girlfriend, I never would have let you snog me. Why would you want to do that, to me or to her?"

"I don't know. Because I'm confused and stupid?" He gave her a wan smile. "When I figure it out, I'll let you know."

"Well, I don't think we can go back to the way we were, at least I can't. I don't know that I trust you anymore."

"Rose-" he pleaded, but she cut him off.

"Maybe someday we can be friends again, but for right now...I just need to focus on school and my A-levels. That's what's important right now." She gave him a half-hearted smile. "So I'll talk to you...whenever."

John gave a resigned sigh, and she thought she saw tears in his eyes. "Yeah." He turned his head, tears pricking behind his eyes.

"See ya." Rose shut the door and leaned against it, finally allowing the tears she had been fighting to fall.

On the other side of the door, John did the same.