Kate's sitting at her desk, hands clasped together and resting against her lips as her elbows lean on her desk. She's staring into space – mind completely elsewhere instead of on the case she's meant to be solving. But how can she focus on work when she told Castle last night that she was pregnant? And to make matters even worse, he still didn't know that he was the father.

When she broke the news to him, he thought she was joking around – trying to pull one over on him. But when he saw how deadpan she was, his whole demeanour changed and Kate had seen not only shock in his eyes; but hurt.

He quickly pulled himself together and congratulated her before Espo and Ryan were interrupting them to update them on the case, and then he'd fled – promised he'd be back tomorrow to help with the case and that was that.

She knew she had to tell him everything, she just didn't know where to start, or how to go about it.

Hearing footsteps coming, Kate's gaze snaps to the opening on the precinct floor to see Castle striding towards her and she quickly unclasps her hands, dropping them down to pick up and open the envelope before her as her brows pull together and she pretends like she was busy doing work instead of staring off into space trying to figure out how she was supposed to tell him this baby was his.

He's placing a cup of coffee down in front of her, and despite not being able to consume the caffeine, there's no controlling the way Kate's lips twitch, almost fully curve into a smile before she's stopping herself and dropping it, gaze flicking away.

They're not okay, and she can't smile – let him think that falling into their old habits of solving cases together and bringing her coffee is going to solve everything – because it won't. He walked away and never called – not only her, but even the boys. She's hurt, and even though she may not have the right to be hurt considering what she was hiding from him; her heart was still bruised from before the Summer.

"Any news?" Castle's gaze flicks to the murder board as he takes a sip of his coffee and just like that the duo slip into work mode – begin discussing details and before Kate even knows it, her and Castle are making a bet: whoever finds out all the connections between the murders – wins.

"If I win, then you have to promise to go away and never interfere with any of my cases again." The words are playful, and there's no hiding the small smirk playing on her lips or the way her brow kinks in just the slightest.

Though she always keeps her promises, and hates losing a bet – especially to Castle. Kate wants to lose this one, she doesn't want to figure it out before him – doesn't want her winnings to be followed through. Because if he disappeared, if he left her and the precinct alone – telling him would continue to be put off.

So, she makes a promise with herself – if she figures it out before he does, she's not going to say anything. She'll just do what they do best and theorize till it clicks for him and once they've wrapped the case, once it's all over with – she'll tell him. No running away, no backing down. She'll rip off the band aid and deal with the aftermath no matter how terrifying it may be.

"Kate!" Kate's head snaps up from her desk, glancing over her shoulder to see Lanie walking towards her and Kate's brows pull together, furrowing.

"Hey, Lanie. What are you doing here?" Kate places her palms out against the desk to push herself back and rise from her seat as she meets her friend in the door-frame.

"I wanted to check up on you, see how you were doing with you know who back."

Kate's tongue slips from her lips, sweeping over her lower lip as she looks over her shoulder to try and see if she can spot Castle anywhere – which she can't. But either way she still takes a hold of Lanie's arm and drags her friend into the empty breakroom where prying eyes and ears won't hear them.

"Lanie, I told him."

"You told him?"

"Yeah – well, also no."

"What do you mean yes and no? Either you told him or you didn't, Kate."

A sigh falls from Kate's lips as she slips into the empty seat, Lanie slipping into the one opposite her.

"I mean – I told him I was pregnant, but I didn't exactly get the chance to tell him it's his. Ryan and Espo interrupted and as soon as they were done, he practically bolted."

"But he showed up this morning, right?" Lanie's brow is raising while Kate nods to her question. "Do you think he has any inkling it's his?"

"I don't think so, Lanie. He still thinks I'm with Demming. He probably thinks it's his – which would explain why he looked so hurt." Her brows furrow, pulling together more as her mind goes back to last night when she told Castle. His reaction not being able to leave her mind.

"And then he bet me that he could solve this case before I could and I told him if I figure it out before him then he has to leave me and the precinct alone completely."

"What the hell did you do that for?!"

"I don't know! He was just… being Castle. A little cocky and you know how him and I are. Always tossing it back at each other, and it was out before I could say otherwise. So, now I have to make sure I don't figure this case out before he does – or at least figure it out, and help him figure it out."

Lanie's head is shaking, arms folding across her chest. "You're both idiots."

"Hey!"

"What? It's true! He doesn't call or show up for three months, but the second he does it's like no time has passed between you two. Except instead of talking about everything and laying everything out on the line – you two joke back and forth."

Lanie leans forwards, hand reaching out to grip Kate's. "Look, sweetie. I know you're still hurt about him leaving, but he's here now, and whether he called doesn't matter. Because right now you have something to tell him that's far more important than some miscommunication."

"I know, Lanie. And I've promised myself that as soon as the case is done, I'll tell him."

"Good. You better keep that promise, girl. Or I'll whoop your ass and then go and tell Castle myself that he's the father."

Before Kate can even react to Lanie's words, a pen is dropping to the floor and Kate's head snaps to the doorway to see Esposito standing there wide eyed – shock written across his face and the colour can't help but drain from Kate's face as a lump forms in the middle of her throat.

"Es-" Kate's rising to her feet as Espo quickly picks up his pen and bolts from the room. "Shit." Kate mumbles under her breath as she snaps her gaze to Lanie. "Do you think he heard that?"

"I don't know… but you might want to go figure it out. I'll catch up with you later, okay?"

Kate nods before she's leaving Lanie and heading out of the break room. Her head looks in every direction to see Esposito by the murder board and Kate quickly bolts across the precinct floor towards him. "Espo!" She says, coming to a halt beside him.

His arms are folded across his chest, brows pulled together tightly as he keeps his gaze locked on the murder board. A sigh falls from Kate's lips, tongue slipping from her mouth to moisten her lips as she reaches out to him, her pulse beginning to thump harder beneath her ribs.

"How much of that did you hear?"

"Enough."

Kate's eyes fall closed, teeth digging into her bottom lip as her hand drops to her side, shifts to rest against her stomach.

The last thing she wanted was for anyone to find out Castle was the father – at least before she had the chance to tell him. She didn't want everyone knowing and for him to find out from someone else, she'd never forgive herself if he heard the news from anyone but her.

"Please don't tell him." It comes out so quiet, that it even takes her back as well as Espo and his expression softens as he steps towards her.

"Hey, Beckett! Will you show Castle the scan?"

Kate's eyes open as she quickly blinks back the tears that had begun to emerge around her eyes as she looks over to see Ryan and Castle heading their way and Kate's chest hitches, pulse beating faster.

"Wh-what?" She stutters, brows pulling together as she swallows the lump in her throat.

"Well, I was telling Castle about how I think you're gonna have a girl, and that Espo thinks you're gonna have a boy and I wanted to see what Castle thinks."

Kate's gaze shifts to Castle standing beside Ryan. His gaze is soft, but she can already see the hurt and uncomfortableness hidden behind the depths of his eyes.

"I-I don't have it with me."

"That's a lie, I saw you looking at it earlier." Espo cuts in, voice slightly sharp and Kate glances towards him, can't help but shoot him a look. Because really? Was he going to actually be like this?

Kate didn't want Castle seeing the 3D picture of the scan – not until he knew that the baby was his. It would physically make her sick to have to watch him admire the picture of their baby with him having no idea that it's his.

"Guys, if she doesn't want me to look at it. It's okay, it is her baby after all." Castle speaks, voice soft as he sees the way Kate had tensed up.

Espo mutters something under his breath – something Kate can't make out, but either way the guilt inside of her continues to grow.

"No, it's fine." Her jaw tightens, as she sucks in a breath and turns towards her desk as she pulls open the draw and grabs the picture of the scan.

Her pulse is racing, the sound travelling up to her ears and causing a deafening sound as she turns back towards them and hesitantly hands the image towards Castle, her slender hands shaking.

Castle stills her hand, a warm smile creasing his lips as he squeezes her flesh and Kate's heart skips a beat, her hand beginning to buzz from the contact of his soft fingers. "Easy there." He jokes, sees the own hesitance in his eyes as he takes the scan from her fingertips and turns it over.

She can't look – can't watch him so her gaze shifts to the ground as she focuses on her breathing. Let's her chest rise up and down as the knot of guilt in her stomach tightens, a nauseating feeling washing over her.

"So, Castle. What'ya think – girl, or boy?" Ryan's oblivious to how Kate is, completely focused on looking over Castle's shoulder as he smiles down at the image of the scan.

"I'm not going to guess. I thought Alexis was going to be a boy for the longest time, could've sworn I even saw for sure it was a boy. I'll just say that it's going to be a little Beckett. 'Cause either way I'm right." He's laughing and Kate can feel the tears burning in her eyelids as her chest rises and falls, the sickness inside of her growing.

"It's a beautiful picture, Beckett. You'll have one beautiful, badass baby." He's handing the scan back towards her but Kate can't force herself to take it - to move, can only concentrate on the thumping of her heart and making sure her vision doesn't blur from the tears in her eyes.

"Beckett?" She feels Castle's hand on her shoulder and her body can't help but jump at his touch. Her head quickly lifts, brows pulling together as a tear slips down her cheek.

"Hey – what's wrong?" Though Castle's brows are pulled together, nothing but concern radiates from his face and as she tears her gaze away to look at Espo and Ryan; their expressions match Castle's.

She can't manage to get any words out – fearing she might word vomit and completely spill to Castle and everyone else right now that he's the father. So instead she takes the scan from Castle's hand and bolts to the bathroom.

Once she reaches the bathroom, she's pressing her forehead against the door and letting out a gasp as tears begin to fall, cascade down the frame of her face. Her feet soon lower, knees colliding with the ground as her fingertips grip the scan tightly, forehead pressing harder against the door as her body begins to shake in the slightest.

She's made such a mess of things.

Lying about something like this, that wasn't like her. She wasn't the type of person who if she fell pregnant wouldn't let the father know. Sure, she kept a lot of things to herself. But something as big as this – she never would have imagined keeping the father of her baby from knowing he was the father. She let the way she felt get in the way of telling Castle, and he had to look down at the picture of her baby – their baby, and now know – have to act like he was happy for her.

He shouldn't look so hurt – so uncomfortable. He should… feel happy, be happy that they had created a life together. But she was keeping it from him, had been for the past three – almost four months and now the first time he looks down at the image of his own baby – he probably felt nothing for it.

A little while later, knocking coming from the other side of the bathroom door pulls Kate out of her thoughts.

"Kate… you okay in there?" Castle's worried voice fills the air and Kate's wiping away at the tears staining her cheek as she swallows the lump in her throat and slowly rises to her feet as she reaches for the door handle and pulls it open to come face to face with Castle looking nothing but concerned for her.

"I'm – fine. Just… felt a little sick." She shrugs as an airy chuckle slips from her lips and she forces the edges of her lips up wide. She sees the apprehension in his face; how she knows he doesn't buy it and is fighting to call her out on it. "Plus, my hormones are crazy. Just last week I almost cried and yelled at some guy because he confessed in interrogation." She digs her teeth into her bottom lip, hopes he'll buy that she's okay and leave it to rest. She can't tell him now – no, she needs to solve this case first, then tell him.

"Wow, now I'd pay to have seen that guy's reaction."

The edges of Kate's lips curl slightly into a more genuine smile.

"But really, Kate. If you're… not okay, I'm here? I know that… well, I know we haven't spoken in months… But I'm here if you need me."

She nods her head, refuses her mind to wander back to the guilt eating away at her insides. "Thanks, Castle."

"I guess you won the bet."

"Yeah – but, look. If you don't wa-"

Kate's quickly cutting him off before he can finish his sentence.

"No, no. You won fair and square." She does everything to contain the smirk threatening to play upon her lips. Because Kate had figured out the connection before him, but refused to let It be known. Instead she kept pushing him in the direction she'd gotten to.

"So… see you tomorrow?" He's smiling at her, and she can't help but reciprocate.

"Uh- actually, there was something I wanted to talk to you about, Castle." She swallows the lump in her throat, her pulse quickly rising as she pulls her bottom lip into her mouth. "About the baby." She murmurs, gaze flicking to land on Castle.

"Oh. Y-yeah, sure. What did you want to talk about exactly? Is it about the father? Cause, hey – look, I know I'm not Demming's biggest fan, but if he-"

Before Castle can even finish Kate's stepping towards him, her hand reaching out to rest against his chest as she shakes her head, brows pulling together. "No – Castle, Demming's not the father. He and I… we broke up a while ago."

She can feel the pounding beneath his chest, and it only causes her own heart rate to speed up. She sees the surprise wash across his face, how he's trying his best not to smile over the fact that her and Demming weren't together anymore.

"When did that happen?"

She retracts her hand, chest rising as her gaze drops to the ground. "Uh, before the Summer." She swallows, as she looks up at Castle once more.

"So, the-"

Castle's interrupted one last time as a familiar voice fills the room of the precinct.

"Kate."

Kate glances over Castle's shoulder to see Josh walking towards them and her brows pull together, furrowing as she sees the doctor.

"Josh… hey – what are you doing here?"

"We had dinner plans, remember?"

Shit. She's only just now remembering that a couple of days ago, Josh and her arranged to have dinner – catch up. But with Castle arriving and her mind being so focused on the baby and when to tell him; she'd completely forgotten about the dinner plans she had made.

"Oh god, Josh, I'm so sorry… I completely forgot."

"Hey, it's okay. No harm done. We can cancel reservations, get some take out instead?"

Her gaze shifts to Castle, sees the way he eyes Josh up and down and it does something inside of her, has the edges of her lips curling up slightly.

Josh's gaze follows hers to land on Castle and his brows pull together.

"Oh! Josh, this is Richard Castle. Castle, this is Josh Davidson."

She watches the two shake hands, sees the way Castle's lips force themselves up into a small smile.

"Ah, the famous mystery writer. Kate's told me a lot about you, nice to finally meet you."

Castle's forced smile turns into a small smirk, the edges of his eyes crinkling as he glances at Kate momentarily, a brow raising. "Oh, has she now?"

There's no helping the flush of colour and heat that rises to Kate's cheek as she cocks her head and lets her gaze drift to the ground, a small smile playing at her lips.

"It's nice to meet you too." Castle finally says before the duo are turning to face Kate.

"So, take out, Kate?"

"Uh, actually, Josh. Raincheck? There was something I needed to talk to Castle about…"

"Oh, hey, no. I don't want to get in the way of your dinner plans. Besides, Alexis and mother will be expecting me. So, I really should get going. But, I'll see you tomorrow?"

Kate's heart can't help but drop to her stomach, a sigh threatening to fall from her lips as she pulls her brows together and nods. "Yeah… see you tomorrow." She swallows the lump in her throat as he smiles at her one last time before disappearing out of the precinct.

"You know, I'm really going to kill you, Josh." Kate mumbles as she shoves some rice into her mouth with her chopsticks.

After Castle had left, Kate had packed up her things and agreed to take out back at her place with Josh.

The pair had become good friends since their first meeting. He had followed Kate out of the bar that night, wanted to make sure she was okay. And after giving her a ride home, Kate invited him in and the pair had talked for the good half of the night.

He tried flirting with her, tried asking her out – but Kate had shut him down each time. She told him she wasn't looking for a relationship right now, that her number one priority was her baby. He had understood, accepted her choice and agreed to be friends. He'd even hung out with her and Lanie a few times and also offered to set Lanie up with one of his colleagues.

"Why? What did I do?"

"I was about to tell Castle before you showed up." She shoves her chopsticks around the cardboard box, brows pulled together tightly as she stares intently down at her food.

"Shit, you were?"

She nods, brows raising as a sigh falls from her lips. "Told myself after we wrapped the case I was going to come clean and tell him. But then you showed up." Her lips pull together tightly as she shoots him a look, almost flings some food at him before deciding she doesn't want rice covering her apartment.

"I'm really sorry, Kate. Had I known, I wouldn't have shown up like that. I just assumed since we had dinner plans."

Kate shakes her head, a sigh falling from her lips. "No, it's not your fault, Josh. I should've remembered we made plans and cancelled before you made the trip over."

"So, when are you gonna tell him now?"

Kate chews on the edges of her bottom lip as she places the cardboard box down on her coffee table before sitting back and tucking her leg under her body. "I guess I could tell him tomorrow."

"You guess? Kate, you really should let him know. I know it's your choice and all… but he does have a right to know it's his. And if he already knows your pregnant… well, you don't want him thinking it's someone else's. Don't wait till the baby's here, Kate."

A sigh falls from her lips as her hand raises to rest against the side of her face. "You're right. I know you're right. Lanie keeps telling me the same thing. I'm just… I'm scared to tell him." Her head drops, hands coming to rest at her stomach as her thumb brushes back and forth over the fabric. "He's going to hate me, Josh." Her head shakes, chest rising as her gaze comes up to meet his.

"Hey – he's not going to hate you, Kate." He shifts forwards, resting his hand against her knee to give it a gentle squeeze.

"I've kept the fact I'm carrying his baby from him for months. Wouldn't you? I mean, he's missed doctor's appointments and scans because I haven't told him. He saw the baby's picture today and –" Kate's head is shaking once more, her chest rising as tears begin to form around her eyes. She doesn't even want to think about what was running through his mind when he first looked at that scan. "I should've just told him before the Summer."

"Maybe you should've. But you can't go back and change what's happened, Kate. You can only change what happens now. So, stop psyching yourself out and just go for it and then whatever happens, happens." He squeezes her knee one last time and gives her a friendly smile.

Kate lifts her head, gaze landing on Josh as the edges of her lips curve in the slightest, a sigh slipping from her lips as her hand begins moving in small circles against her stomach. She has to tell Castle already. Just rip the band aid off instead of running whenever an obstacle gets in her way.