Disclaimer-I don't own Digimon.
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Kouji kara Takuya e
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It's...been a while. Stupid goggle head. You've grown up.
No. No, you haven't grown up. We've grown up. The two of us. Together. We've grown off each other, haven't we? We've both matured a little.
I can imagine you'll be thinking, "How can you mature anymore than you have before we met you?" I wasn't mature, Takuya. That was me trying to be mature. But...but does maturity really matter? It feels like this is the only way I can get to what I want to say.
I've always been a loner. They call it 'lone wolf' but it's just loner to me. Wolves travel in packs, don't they? Well, we aren't talking about wolves. This will take time. Bear with me, and if I see you yawning...it's going to be more than just one hit from a stick. Just think slice and dice.
Well, that is...if you're reading this.
Alone. My dad tried to make my childhood interesting. I got a dog. Sure, he's great, but a dog is nothing if you don't have a family. He remarried.
I didn't want a stepmother. I wanted my mother. My real mother. I couldn't experience things with Satomi that I could with my real mother, so I decided I might as well grow up. I confined myself in my thoughts, created a barrier that no one could breach, made myself a solo player in our game.
Every wall has a weak brick, and I did too. I wanted a family. A replacement agency isn't going to throw a new mother, a new brother, or anything with sentimental value your way. These things have to be earned. Because I couldn't have it, I decided to build this wall with only one way of undoing it.
You weren't there with me in Sakkakumon, but when Karatenmon...
No...no, I'll start from the beginning.
It was...a while after the battles with Grumblemon when I realized I was hardly an adult. I looked at you, Izumi, Junpei and Tomoki, and I saw that, even though you weren't related, you were much like a family. That's what friends are, though, right? A family. I saw a family, and that day, a part of the wall began to crumble.
Soon enough, almost all of the wall gave way and revealed me for what I really was. But by then, I had become another me that I couldn't help but be the mature me I was. I looked at all of you and saw myself as a mere child in your shadows. Especially yours, Takuya. I hated it. I looked at you, I saw you as a great leader, goggle brained at times, but brilliant overall.
I saw you fighting Duskmon, and realized that the person who I had begrudgingly begun to admire had disappeared. I wondered what happened to you, and I realized you were no more grown up than I was. Something inside of me made you seem more important than you really were.
NOT...that you aren't important. Don't get me wrong. Slice and dice, remember?
And when I slammed you against the wall before Duskmon attacked, before I was injured, I saw you for what you were. A different me. No, that's disgusting. You could never be me. But...you thought you were grown up. You thought every decision you made was the right decision, like an adult does. You thought that you could gamble with our lives. See, Takuya, I realized then and there that that was how I had acted, but I had only been gambling with my own life.
I got hurt, hours seemed to pass, and then you came back. I guess, compared to you, it takes a genius to tell you changed. If you intend to hurt me at this statement, just remember: slice and dice. I finally saw who I wanted to see. Someone I could compete against, someone who was...
I'm getting sick of the word mature. I've written it down so many times in this card that I'm not even sure I'm spelling it right.
Yeah, I looked at you, and I saw that person who I wanted to fight beside. Someone who I could count on, someone who wouldn't gamble with my life. Decisions were affirmed by everyone, everyone gave their ideas, and everyone pitched into the battle against Cherubimon, the Royal Knights, then Lucemon.
Maybe I lost the point I wanted to say. Maybe I didn't. Now that I'm writing this all down, I'm not sure how to say it anymore...
You helped me a lot, Takuya. I know, it sounds so...blunt. But you did. You helped me so much. Against Velgemon...when I realized, "That's not a digimon, that's my twin brother who shouldn't exist," when I realized I didn't want to fight Kouichi, you helped me onto my feet again. You told me that brothers fight. They do. And, truthfully, Takuya, from that day, anytime I feel the urge to murder you, I just think of you as a brother.
After all, friends are just another family, right?
You'll probably argue, "But family is only family if there's blood relation!" Families adopt, don't they? And that adopted child is still family. Satomi is still my mother, part of my family, stepmother or not.
Because I realized as we left the Digital World that it isn't the blood that counts. It's the experience. What you experience with whoever determines your relationship with that person. You nearly die with that person, and you both have to survive, for example, and that person tries to steal your food, they'll forever be your enemy. In the same situation, say instead that said person offers you food, watches your back, and shares the dangers and the treasures with you, you'll feel a stronger connection, don't you think?
I always looked at everyone but Kouichi (he's my brother, after all) and wondered, "Why is it I feel so normal around them?" I'd always have my guard up around people, before the Digital World. When I met all of you, I think I let that fall with my wall. I wasn't tense, I was relaxed, I could joke (however horribly), I could laugh (I didn't want to), I could do what I pleased (to a sense).
There are a lot of people who tried to help me. My dad, Satomi, my teachers...random classmates who didn't know a thing about me. I did get help, I guess.
Let's offer you the chance to guess who helped me! Up for a game of twenty questions?
Here, I'll set out the twenty stupid questions you'll probably ask:
1-Do I know him?
Yes.
2-Do I live near him?
Define near.
3-When near is in the city?
Yes.
4-Is he my age.
Yes.
5-Does he have red hair?
No.
6-Blue hair?
No.
7-Green eyes?
No.
8-Purple eyes?
No.
9-Orange eyes?
No.
10-Goggles?
Yes.
11-Goggles have become a new fad, haven't they?
No.
12-Are you counting that as a question?
Yes.
13-That?
Yes.
14-Are you counting this, too?
Yes.
15-How many questions do I have left?
That's not a yes or no.
16-I know him, right?
Already answered.
17-I know who it is! It's Kouichi! Right?
No.
18-...It is a guy, right?
Yes.
19-Junpei?
No.
20-Tomoki?
No.
And the buzzer sounds. Those are my predictions of the twenty stupid questions you'll ask. Do you have anymore in mind? No? Good.
Now that the stupidity is done, I'll tell you who it is, goggle brain. OBVIOUSLY, YOU. But you're too dense to understand that. In all our battles, we watched each other's back. We depended on each other, we shared moments that no one else would have understood. In a way, you're more of a brother than Kouichi is, but I think that will change if he reads this. Slice and dice, don't let him read this.
You've grown on me, Takuya. You've managed to make me who I am. Everyone else helped too, but...significantly...it was you. I managed to come out of my cloister, I became human.
I matured. I accomplished what I intended to do alone with your help. I realized I wasn't alone. I had people I could count on, people to help me. People like you. So thanks, Takuya. Please, burn this letter when you're done reading it.
Then again, since when has the past just been the past?
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A/N-
Not how I imagined. Kouji's character is hard to get into (considering this is Takuya we're talking to). Lots of room for improvement. Opinions?
Thank you for the reviews- JyouraKoumi, Birdboy, Kayhera, Appaku, Circeus
Review or Flame.