I plunked myself down on a bench across from the grocery store. It was hot, the sun was just about straight up in the sky and not many people were stupid enough to wander around in the heat. I leaned back into the shade and closed my eyes savoring a breeze as it ruffled my hair moaning as I recalled all that had happened.

"Excuse me for prying but I couldn't ignore such a pretty girl who seemed distressed."

I turned to my left, another ninja had appeared on the bench right next to me. The whole 'pop up' thing was number four on my 'why I hate ninjas' list if you wanted to know.

"No, not really." I answered. "Just enjoying the breeze."

"Are you sure? If you don't want to tell me about it I understand. It has been my experience though that unspoken problems never find solutions."

There was a slightly off key note of truth in his statement; enough that I spontaneously decided that I really might need help on this matter. The only ninja in the family had moved out. The one sitting next to me looked pretty friendly although getting on in the years.

"Well you see..."

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"-and frankly I don't know what to do about it." I finished.

He scribbled a couple more notes in his little book and nodded. "That's quite a difficult situation you're in." he agreed.

"No kidding. Any advice on how to get out of it? I mean you are another ninja, is there something that you all universally try to avoid?"

He glanced at me out of the corner of his eye. "You could turn into a psychopathic killer."

I laughed weakly. "Any other choices?"

"Hmmm." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Are you sure you want to get out of this situation?"

"Hmmm difficult question...YES!"

"Why? Is he ugly?"

"No...not really. He's kind of cute and I guess he's funny. In fact he'd be a pretty likable guy if it weren't for the circumstance." He continued writing in his book.

"Well what's the problem then."

"Well the circumstance for one."

"...hmmmmm."

"Do you think if I tried to be really shy he'd go away? Maybe just get bored of me or something?"

He paused, pen over paper. "Nah...too cliché. I mean—ninjas kind of like that! Sharp contrast to the harsh job requirements you know."

"Oh, right."

"Maybe I should just give him the book."

"NO! That would be...giving in. That's the only trouble you're causing him in return for all he's done to you. If you give it up there's no way to get back at him, right?"

"Yeah, I guess. Well I can't be shy, can't be normal, heh maybe I should throw myself at him?"

Scribble scribble pause. "That might work..."

"On the other hand, what would I do if he took me seriously? Ulgh, ditch that idea."

"Mmm hmmm." Scribble scribble.

"I suppose I could randomly take interest in another guy, but there's no one I like and like before if they took me seriously...there has to be some sort of solution."

Pause. "Why don't you make a bet over the book."

I twisted to look at him. "What do you mean a bet?"

Furious scribbling. "A bet, with the book as the prize. That way it's not relinquishing it but if you win you could make him leave you alone. You'll just have to make sure he agrees to the bet, somehow set it up so that he can't resist taking you up on it."

"What could I possibly offer besides the book? I mean if he waits long enough another copy will come through anyway. He really doesn't need it and I haven't finished it yet."

"What book is it? I might be able to get another copy fairly quick. I have connections in the publishing area."

"Really? That would be great."

"Well, what book is it?"

"...well...promise not to laugh?"

"On my honor as a shinobi."

"Well I really haven't had much time to read it, a friend suggested it to me and I just kind of bought it. Just like that you know."

"What's the title?"

I hesitated but for extra copy though this was the quickest route. "Volume seven of Come Come Paradise?"

The pen flipped out of his hand and we both watched it arc through the air and land on the dusty street. He grinned very oddly and then glanced my way. I squirmed.

"Really?"

"Yes?"

He leaned forward, grabbing his pen and brushing dust off the tip. "I'll see what I can do about it. I can't make any promises though."

"What should I do in the meantime then?"

"I'd say go for the bet idea, just incase. This could take a while, the publishing industry aren't the compliant type."

"I still don't know anything that would make him agree to the bet though."

"You'll have to be sneaky, calculating, listen to him and find out what might make a good bribe for his side of the bet. Then all you have to do is set the terms."

If his pen was a kunai the book would be shredded the way he was going at it. "What happens if I loose the bet though?"

"Either....he likes you and its more than the book, or...scribble scribble... he's got the book and is out of your life?"

"But what if it's the first one?"

He smiled knowingly. "Well I guess you'll just have to think about that when you get there."

"You're right...Oh hi Kanoi!"

"Akiko, who's your friend?"

"Oh, this is Jiraiya-sama. He's helped me come up with a plan."

"Great! Hey I really appreciate you doing this you know."

"No problem at all, she's been...an inspiration to me as well."

"Hmmm you know I swear your name sounds probably. Ah well I've got to go. Good luck Akiko-chan, if you need any more help I'll be around town for a couple of weeks."

"Thanks so much Jiraiya-sama!"

"You're welcome. Good day Ladies."

"Bye!"

"Bye!"

We waited for him to disappear down the street before turning to face each other. "You know I swear I've heard his name before too." I commented.

"Yeah, it's just at the edge of my mind but I can't seem to pin it down..."

"It'll come to us eventually."

"Yeah. No hurry."

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"Hey, Amazuki!"

"Jiraiya-sama, always a pleasure. What can I do for you today?"

"You know my latest book?"

"Volume Seven, I just approved the regular distributions to the whole of Konoha."

"I want you to hold them back. In fact I want you to recall all unsold copies."

"What! But Jiraiya-sama the readers have been waiting, we're expecting to make record sales with this one!"

"IF YOU WANT ANOTHER SCRIPT FROM ME YOU'LL RECALL THEM!"

"Right away Jiraiya-sama. I can have them all back in two days is that okay?"

"Perfect Amazuki, knew I could count on you!"

"My... pleasure Jiraiya-sama."

"I'll tell you when it's okay to redistribute, but until then I better not see even one issue. Got it?"

"Of course Jiraiya-sama."

"Good. Have a nice day Amazuki."

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That night I scraped my mind for some sort of 'bribe' that would be tempting to an ANBU. A new mask perhaps? A set of shuriken? A job that didn't involve bloodshed?

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"I'm sorry Mr. Hatake, that book seems to have been unexpectedly recalled for some reason."

"Recalled?"

"Yes, every single copy we've checked all the suppliers I'm sorry."

"Maa maa, tell me if you get any in then."

"Of course Hatake-sama."