Okay I know it's been two weeks, so here is the much anticipated next chapter. Sorry it took so long for those of you who care when I got my wisdom teeth out there was complications and last Friday I found out I had an infection, so they had to put a hole in this giant puss pocket I had in my cheek. The swelling is just starting to go down so I decided to give you guys a new chapter! YAY!
Special thanks to jade304 and ashpi for answering my question and giving me advice. You Guys Rock! Thanks! So here we got Chapter 3!
Disclaimer: If I was Stephanie Meyers, I wouldn't be writing this here wishing I owned the characters, now would I?
Ready or Not, Here We Come
Bella's POV
As we pulled into the parking lot of the Port Angeles Wal-mart around ten (am), Alice dived out of the car and ran faster than she should toward the front doors. The rest of us quickly got out of the car and headed over to the others who were standing off to the side of the doors waiting for us. Rosalie was sporting a large hat and huge sunglasses in an attempt to make sure no one recognizes her. Alice with a look of terror ran over to her and whispered something in her ear, Rosalie sighed than removed both before heading back to Emmett's jeep.
I stared after her questionably being the only one who didn't hear what Alice said. Edward turned to me and smiled, and said, "Alice told Rosalie that they wouldn't help and that they would get ruined if she continued to wear them. Rosalie is not to happy to be here, but is excited for what were going to do."
By the time he had answered my question Rosalie was back and glaring at him, Emmett was practically shaking with anticipation (Alice already was as soon as we got there, but she had to protect fashion before we started), which was in turn making Jasper hop up and down in place with an evil smile on his face. While Carlisle, Esme, Edward, and I looked on a little frightened.
Finally Alice snapped and squealed, "Alright here are your list, we will split up into couples and complete our individual tasks, than come together at noon in the McDonald's for Bella to eat. After that we will do the couple tasks and the family ones. We shouldn't get caught, but we have to be out of here by 4:18 because that is when they will get fed up and call the police. If we are still here after that Charlie will arrive and catch us."
"Wait a second, how will Charlie and those other guys catch us. I mean we are super cool vampires with speed, strength, and smartness. We can take them!" Emmett said.
"Emmett, we may have all of that, but we can't use it in front of the humans, except Bella of course," Carlisle said, "Besides I can't risk being arrested. I'm a highly respected doctor, how would it look if I was arrested for pranking a Wal-mart."
"I can't risk it either," Edward said gazing down at me, "Charlie already hates me. He is just looking for a reason to shoot me. Not to mention what he would do to Bella."
He was right Charlie had been relentlessly questioning him trying to find a flaw that he could use to convince me not to marry Edward. If we were caught that would be just another fight, and I really don't want my last months with Charlie to be spent fighting over this. Maybe this wasn't the best idea.
As I was about to speak my mind I was interrupted by a glare from Alice as she said, "Don't even think about it Bella, there is no backing out now or I will take you to New York tomorrow and have a one of a kind custom made Pnina Tornai wedding dress. As long as we are gone by 2:18 Charlie will be none the wiser that you were even here."
The thought scared me, due to the upcoming wedding I have secretly been watching all the wedding shows I can and I knew that her dress could cost thousands of dollars. I once saw one that sold for over $35,000. Besides it was going to be fun right. Edward smiled and wrapped his arm around me, he kissed my cheek and whispered, "Don't worry Bella I won't let anything happen to you."
He effectively dazzled me. All I could do was nod my head as we began to look over our paper. It said:
Find the electric box, and shut down the electricity to the whole store! EDWARD (save until we leave)
While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room when people are in the restrooms. EDWARD
"Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics. EDWARD
When the loud speaker come on collapse to the floor yelling about the voices. EDWARD
Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters. EDWARD
Make a trail of tomato sauce to the girl's bathroom. BELLA
Get an empty book, and say it's a guest book. Force people to sign in. BELLA (after lunch)
Take a full set of guy's clothes and a full set of gal's clothes, then leave them lying somewhere. BELLA
Get a stuffed animals and go to the front of the store and begin stroking them lovingly and talking to them. BELLA
Set all the alarm clocks to go off at two minute intervals throughout the day. BELLA
Thank people for coming to your wedding when they enter the store calling them all the same name. BELLA AND EDWARD (for after lunch)
I laughed; this was going to be fun. Edward was smiling down at me mischievously.
"What do you want to do first, love?" I looked up only just realizing that all the other couples had left to begin their tasks.
"Well, we each have one to do after lunch and we both have one to do by the bathroom, so let's start there." He smiled at me, took my hand and led me towards the store. Ready or Not, Here we come!
Esme's POV
Once we arrived we met out front of the store to receive our tasks. After discussing the plan we were off. I really hope none of the kids cause to much trouble, I hate having to bail them out of jail. There is always one that ends up there in each town I hope with Bella here we may be able to avoid it.
Carlisle and I walked inside the store and over to the flower section before looking over our list, it read:
Fill an entire shopping cart with only rash cream. CARLISLE (after lunch, and don't say you're a doctor)
Make up nonsense products and ask employees if there are any in stock. CARLISLE
Fill your cart up as much as possible, and then try to use the express lane finally deciding you only want a candy bar that wasn't even in the cart. CARLISLE
Ask if you can test some super-glue before buying it, then walk around the store gluing random items to other items/customers/staff. CARLISLE
Try putting different pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually. CARLISLE
Try to pay for your normal Wal-Mart items in the Wal-Mart Subway/McDonalds. ESME
Shop in the stock room as if it were the actual store. ESME
Try returning something that isn't sold at Wal-Mart. ESME (after lunch)
Switch prices on expensive stuff and cheap stuff. ESME
When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word. ESME
Carlisle stood there shocked at some of his tasks; it seemed that Alice was still a little mad about how last month Carlisle took away her credit cards and forbid her to shop for a week. I giggled remembering how she begged Carlisle to reconsider after the first 32 hours. Yes she was definitely still mad about that.
"Which would you like to do first, dear," I said, trying to hold the amusement out of my voice. He gaped at me and then replied.
"I can't believe she did that. She spent over 2 million dollars in one day of shopping, she has a $500,000 per month clothing budget. And now she is punishing me for being a responsible parent."
"It's alright, honey. I'm sure if we find Emmett he will switch a few tasks with you," I soothed him. He really was panicking. He had been planning which ones he wanted all the way here, so that Alice would have a vision of it. She hadn't given him any of them.
"No," Carlisle replied stubbornly, "the children would never let me live it down if I had to trade. That's exactly what Alice wants. I am going to complete my jobs fully and to the best of my ability if it kills me. Come on we should get some carts to start working on this list."
With that we were off! This is going to be a very long day.
Alice's POV
Whaaaaahhhaaaa! I laughed evilly in my head as I assigned the jobs each person had to accomplish from the list. Carlisle was going to get none of the ones he wanted and all the ones he didn't. That's what he get for taking away shopping, how dare he. I will never forget him for the …dark week. I shuddered as I thought about it. This will show him to never stand in the way of Mary Alice Brandon Whitlock Hale Cullen.
As I glanced up from my handy work I saw Edward staring at me suspiciously threw the mirror. Mind your own business, Edward, or I will make sure this trip is miserable for you and take Bella shopping all weekend. I threatened silently in my head. I saw him cringe in fear and take Bella's hand silently before nodding at me. Good, Edward was smart enough to not mess with me.
Suddenly everything went black as I was pulled into a vision.
Rosalie was at a checkout in Wal-mart buying a bar of chocolate. When suddenly checkout girl screams frustratedly, "How many times are you going to buy the same bar of candy. Return it and buy another one."
Rosalie glares angrily at her and says, "I can do whatever I want as many times as I want, so why don't you just do your pathetic little job and ring up my damn candy bar."
The girl, who I just realized was Jessica Stanley from school, huffs then throws the disgusting melted chocolate bar at Rosalie. It hit her beautiful designer hat splattering open staining it and her Dolce and Gabanna glasses in its thick, mess.
"Rosalie Hale. What are you doing here, I thought you have always bragged that Wal-mart was to good for you," Jessica sneered as my vision cut out.
I gasped as I came out of one of the most terrifying visions I have ever had. No those beautiful designer accessories ruined, stained forever with the awful smell of chocolate. I must save them! As I thought this we pulled into the parking lot, quickly before the car even stopped I grabbed my bag and dived out the door, running slightly faster than I should toward Rosalie by the front door.
I heard the others coming up behind me as I sobbed quietly into Rosalie ear, "Oh, Rosalie it was awful you can't wear those beautiful accessories they were ruined by some stupid employee with no taste in fashion in one of the most brutal ways. You must save them you're going to be recognized either way, but if you don't remove them you will lose them in a tragic way."
She sighed disappointed that she would be recognized, but not willing to risk fashion she left to go put them inside Emmett's jeep were they will be safe. Well now that that's done we can get started. I passed out the lists and told everyone the plan, once we stopped arguing over it Jasper and I walked inside and over to the clothing section where Jasper looked over our list that said:
Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles. ALICE
Hide in the clothing rack and when people walk by give them advice. ("That's not your color." "Better get the smaller size." "Pick the pink one." etc.) ALICE
While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying. ALICE (after lunch)
Insist that the automatic doors are magical portals to other realms. ALICE
While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this shit, anyway?" ALICE
Ask to see a rifle in the sporting goods section and once handed it ask where the anti-depressants are. JASPER
Go to the fish section with a recipe book in hand and point out a fish to an employee and say "MMM...That one will do" JASPER
Use a bullhorn and occasionally say that there is free candy in aisle 12. JASPER (after lunch)
Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with toys as soldiers. JASPER
Run out of the Wal-Mart bank (yes, they have a Wood Forest National Bank) with some toy guns yelling "LETS GO LETS GO!" Proceed to hop in the back of the motorized Barbie Jeep and speed out of the store. ALICE AND JASPER (After Lunch)
He smirked wickedly as he read threw the list, and then said, "After you, my darling," as I climbed into the clothing racks to begin my first task.
Rosalie's POV
As Emmett pulled the jeep into the parking lot of the horrid store, I grabbed my Dolce and Gabanna sunglasses and my Tory Burch hat so that no one would recognize me going here. We got out of the jeep and walked over towards Carlisle and Esme, who were waiting by the front entrance. As we arrived Edward pulled into the parking lot and Alice dived out of the car with a look of horror on her face.
She ran over to me and whisper cried, "Oh, Rosalie it was awful you can't wear those beautiful accessories they were ruined by some stupid employee with no taste in fashion in one of the most brutal ways. You must save them you're going to be recognized either way, but if you don't remove them you will lose them in a tragic way."
No, not my new designer accessories they just arrived from New York last week. I guess I will have to endure the torture of people seeing me at this store. I can't lose my accessories to that horrible fate. I sighed and quickly walked back to the jeep to safely store them away, I heard Edward explaining what was going on to his human on the way.
He really does love her. It is good to see him happy, but I really think she isn't that smart. She is giving up so much. I would do anything to have a baby. But the last time we talked she made me realize that a baby isn't worth it without my teddy bear (Emmett), so I guess I can see why she is doing it.
When I arrived back we discussed the plan for (shudder) Wal-mart's demise. Then she passed out the list of assignments to help bring about it doom. Emmett and I quickly went over the auto section to read over our list. It read:
Race a display bike (preferably small and pink) down a busy aisle at maximum speed while yelling "No Brakes!" EMMETT
Go into the dressing room then after a few minutes complain that there is no toilet paper. EMMETT
Drive around the store on tricycles screaming "The British are coming" EMMETT (after lunch so we can watch)
Try to purchase a lawnmower in the self check-out line. EMMETT
In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with another girl and start flirting with him in that annoying, ditsy way. When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. ROSALIE
Place condoms in random people's carts. ROSALIE(after lunch, we'll want to watch)
When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?" ROSALIE
Go to the checkout and buy a bar of candy. Repeat, going to the same cash register, until the clerk notices. ROSALIE
Tell someone that you will sue for false advertising, since they do not sell walls. ROSALIE
Play "Pimp My Ride" with one of the electronic wheelchair/shopping carts you can get at the entrance. Spray-paint the wheels/ mount a radio on the front/ sprinkle unnecessary amounts of glitter on it. EMMETT AND ROSALIE(after lunch)
Oh, this is going to be good, I thought as Emmett laughed manically. We were going to destroy them and victory would be ours. We shall wreak chaos on them, and the best part is they won't even see it coming. On that thought I joined in maniacal laughter, as I said quietly to myself, "Welcome to hell, Wal-mart."
So tell me what you thought! Who would have guessed Rosalie hates Wal-mart so much. Alice would have a panic attack over accessories, or that she would be so mean to Carlisle.
Pictures of Rosalie's accessories are on my profile for anyone who cares.
Please REVIEW and tell me what you thought and which pranks I should start with, each person will do one per chapter!
Thanks for reading, see you next time!
And remember REVIEW!