Now go on, and drift away.
Blindness didn't exactly render Toph a shopaholic.
Honestly, she didn't care what she wore at all, as long as it didn't cover the soles of her feet. She really didn't care for the extravagant gowns she had been forced to wear at home, but it was only because they were difficult to earthbend in without slipping on a piece of unnaturally long cloth or something.
Even under these circumstances, the Toph was forced against her will to join Ty Lee and Katara on a shopping trip for the wedding - which was in approximately three weeks. Or was it two? She couldn't quite remember.
The incident had been nearly a week ago, but unfortunately bad memories don't fade so easily. Every night she stood in her shower and scrubbed her body so raw that her shoulder blades began to bleed.
As Toph listened to her two companions giggle and whisper while roaming the store and robbing the clothing racks, the young earthbender's thoughts darkened.
Why me? she had to wonder. She began to feel frightened for her friends; if something so terrible could happen to her, the greatest earthbender in history, then surely her two strong-but-not-quite-as-strong associates were in danger as well... plus, from what she could gather, both Ty Lee and Katara were very attractive. Obviously, she wasn't quite sure what she looked like, but the lack of compliments definitely insinuated a deficiency in Toph's looks department. The only people that had ever regarded her as good-looking were Katara and…
Toph ignored herself and skillfully shut her feelings down, something she had mastered quite recently.
"Hey, Toph, come try this on real quick!" with a sigh, the young girl moped over to where her friends were and was immediately bombarded with various clothing items, almost suffocating her.
Katara began sifting through the multiple lumps of cloth, going into explicit detail on what each of them looked like for her sake. It was a really kind gesture, but ultimately useless.
Unwilling to waste her time trying to find out which opening was for her head and which one was for her arms, Toph simply stood in the dressing room for a few minutes and then returned with the dress that felt the softest.
"Ooh! I really like this one," Ty Lee purred, accidentally running her manicured nails over the earthbender's own grubby fingers while stroking the fabric. "Good choice."
"This one is long-sleeved, Toph, and it's a really pretty ivory-whitish color. It's tight over the chest but then kind of expands for the skirt… you're going to look so cute! Please let me do your hair," Katara squealed.
"Can I do your makeup?" Ty Lee asked in her sugary voice.
Toph didn't even think before she replied, "Sure." Yeah, because things worked out so well the last time you played dress up, dummy.
She was then forced to sit down on the ground of a dressing room for nearly an hour as Ty Lee and Katara praised and critiqued various outfits on each other. She could not believe how easily the two girls stripped and re-dressed in front of each, like they were doing something as simple as taking a hair-tie out. Toph would have been mortified to be in the same room as a naked girl, and she couldn't even see.
Katara had seen her in an undershirt and pants, like, maybe once. Is there some girl-code etiquette I missed out on during my childhood solitary confinement? Toph wondered as she listened the never-ending cycle of unbuttoning, then buttoning. Zipping, then unzipping. It was maddening.
Once the girls were finally done and had paid for their new fancy formal wear, Toph was relieved to be on their way home. The trio had just exited the shop when Ty Lee shrieked, "Oh no!"
"What? What is it?" Katara's heart spiked up in panic.
"We forgot about jewelry!"
"Please kill me," Toph muttered.
She was dragged over to some booth where she was forced to sit in a chair so high her feet couldn't touch the floor. Cheap pieces of metal were brought up to her throat so Katara could find out which one 'completed her look'. Maybe it was because she was blind, but Toph didn't really know what 'completing a look' meant.
After her look had been completed, the Toph was left alone as two girls went on a detailed search around the booth for their look-completers, leaving her to slump in her seat.
I could be normal, she thought, I can forget.
Since her feet weren't touching the ground, she couldn't feel his steps. Not that she would know what they felt like, but maybe it wouldn't have been such a surprise that something was approaching that way.
"Ty Lee! How are you?"
Every muscle, every bone, every ligament in her whole body went stiff. Her blood ran backwards and the tiny hairs layering her skin stuck straight up.
Toph couldn't hear much, everything was just white noise for a few moments. She wished she was deaf instead of blind when the sound began crawling back inside her ears, sending a chill up her spine.
"Aw, who's this cute little thing?" Don't pretend, don't lie. You know me, I know you. You know, you remember.
"Oh, that's Toph. She's fourteen - she is cute, huh?" Ty Lee was so oblivious, she sounded way too cheerful. Maybe Katara could... maybe she would notice something was weird, that something was so wrong -
"She is, but a little young for me," Dai was trying to keep it as light as possible to avoid suspicion, and both Ty Lee and Katara bought right into it with two girly laughs.
Katara rested a hand on the young earthbender's shoulder. "Toph, this is Dai. He was the one that threw the party we went to last week, you remember that?" she paused, "Toph?"
This was way too much. Her throat was burning and her eyes seared with tears she was unwilling to let loose. Her lips had dried from her heavy breathing - she couldn't open her mouth without exposing herself. Even worse, he - it was there, in the flesh, and it would just deny everything… It was too much, too much for her.
It was just better to say nothing at all.
"We need to talk about Toph."
Those were the first words Sokka heard when he opened the door to Zuko's beach house. He glanced down the hall and eyed a grand Team Avatar reunion gathered around the dining table with one - two, counting him - key components missing.
"Hey, no worries, I'm here," the tribesman rushed over to his friends, quickly grabbing a seat next to Zuko and then focusing his attention on his sister with a goofy grin, "So are we talking about real Toph, or Ember-Island-play-Toph?"
Katara narrowed her eyes and stood up abruptly. "I'm serious, Sokka! Something is really wrong with her and I'm worried!"
Sokka made eye contact with Aang, who nodded and cautiously rested a hand on her arm. "We're all worried, Katara, and I'm sure Sokka is too." those gentle words from the Avatar were all it took for the waterbender to sit back down with an anxious sigh. Aang cleared his throat, then spoke in an authoritative tone. "We've all noticed Toph's strange behavior lately, right? Zuko, I know you haven't been around her much, but basically- ''
"No, that's the thing," Zuko interrupted thoughtfully, "We're friends, obviously. Everytime she visits us she loves to make me go out, buy her expensive dinner, tease Mai and me, you know, the usual stuff. But she hasn't said a word to me. Frankly, it's just weird."
"She won't eat. Not even her favorite foods - ''
"She won't talk ever since we went shopping a few days ago - ''
"She hardly even drinks water - ''
"She never leaves her room - ''
"Okay!" Sokka exclaimed, banging a fist on the table. His three friends stopped speaking over each other and stared at him, startled.
"Something is obviously wrong, we've already confirmed that. Instead of stressing how we know, why don't we find out why she's acting so strange. Toph is never open about her feelings, and she's never this obvious when something is bothering her. She doesn't like to be viewed as weak; she sees emotions as weaknesses. Clearly, something is eating her up so badly inside that she can tell she's displaying it outside - and she doesn't want us to see that, doesn't want us to know, so she's locking herself up and zipping her mouth shut," Sokka gulped, then continued, "Evidently, she doesn't want to tell us yet. And that's okay, that's just how Toph is. But what's important for right now is making sure she's healthy. She needs to start eating and drinking again, right? We got to start small then work our way up." The tribesman scanned his companions' faces, searching for any sign of approval or disapproval.
"Sokka," Zuko coughed uneasily, "I think we should leave this to you." he motioned to Aang and Katara, who slowly nodded in agreement with the firebender.
"Um...me? All - all by myself?" Sokka squeaked, the responsibility rippling in front of his eyes and making him a bit dizzy.
"You guys are the closest," Aang supplied, running a hand down his fuzzy head sheepishly, "No matter how much time we spend with Toph, none of us can understand her the way you do."
"Okay, that's true, but I can't help but feel like you guys are just trying to… you know, toss the blame," Sokka admitted, raising an eyebrow..
Aang smiled. "Well, yeah, that too."
"Toph? I brought you dinner."
When he received no answer for a few short minutes, Sokka pushed the door open. He had to survey the room for a moment before his eyes could catch the tiny figure curled up on the ground, a light blue blanket wrapped around her slim body.
The tribesman sat down a few feet away from her since she was so touchy lately. He set the tray containing her food in between them, then crossed his hands in his lap as he stared at her. Her face was turned away from him, but he knew she wasn't sleeping.
"You have to eat," Sokka said, trying to sound stern, "Please. I can't watch you starve yourself." The desperation had sunk into his voice, causing it to crack slightly.
That was all it took, apparently. Toph wordlessly perched herself up on her elbows and seated herself in a criss-cross position. She kept her head at such a low angle that Sokka couldn't see her facial expression, and reached out to grab a kabob off the plate. Soon enough, she had slowly begun to munch on it. How can she eat this slow when it's been so long since she last had a meal?
Her fingers trembled as she held the thin stick in her small hands. When she had finished the single kabob, she drank the whole glass of water and then, definitively pushed the plate away from herself.
Her hair was sticking up in strange places and - no offense to her - not looking too terrific. Sokka stood up to sit behind her, prayed his fingers weren't terribly dirty, and then began combing through his best friend's tangled mane.
"I'm full of surprises, you know," the warrior said cockily, setting specific strands to the side as he was taught long ago, "Bet you never guessed I knew how to braid hair. I don't know how to do anything too crazy, so don't expect much, but I can do the original thing like a pro. I could teach a class on it; braidbending." Sokka grinned. "Admit it, I'm funny." No reply.
Halfway down her mop of raven hair, Sokka thought he was doing a pretty good job. With his hands, at least - his mouth was a different story entirely. "You know, Toph, I have a really good idea. And, as you know, I'm the idea guy… Anyways, after Zuko's wedding, I think I'm going to take a vacation. I miss traveling, don't you…? I think you and I should go on a trip together, like, to nowhere specifically. We can just have fun, go anywhere we want, just be with each other - because I'm sick of being apart, you know? You're my best friend, I ought to spend as much time with you as I can, right?" the tribesman leaned back, admiring his handiwork. "I finished, by the way. It looks good, I think."
Still, no words, no noises, no sounds. He could hardly hear her breathing.
He let out a long breath as he stood up. When he spoke, he began moving towards the door at the same pace. "It's getting late. I'm gonna go to bed, okay? I'll bring you your breakfast in the morning, and then maybe we can talk - ''
"Wait."
That was all he needed. He stopped, his fingertips barely grazing the doorknob.
"I… haven't been sleeping," her voice was so quiet, so weak, "'Cause I get nightmares."
Sokka turned around to face her, but the young girl's head was still hung. She refused to let him see her face, but... he could manage. He would. "I'll stay, then."
Toph stood on wobbly legs, hunching over as she slowly moved towards the bed. She lay right in the middle of the mattress, so Sokka figured that she didn't mean to share with him. That was okay. That was fine. He wasn't tired anyway.
He turned the lights out for her, then sat on the edge of her bed to face the window. The warrior was under some sort of spell gazing out at the moon when he suddenly felt a soft poke at his spine.
He glanced behind; her hand was offered to him and he took it with a smile on his face. Toph lay on her side facing him, her hair braided back thus revealing her face to him at last. He examined her in the full moonlight; there were bags under her opaque eyes, and a hint of dryness bordering her lips, but still she was beautiful to him.
Beautiful? His heart skipped a beat and he wondered if he had ever used that word to describe her before. He doubted its synonymity for a split second, yet the longer Sokka looked at her, the better it seemed to describe her.
"I get sick now when I eat," she whispered.
"Shhh, go to sleep," he said, running his fingers over hers in an attempt to soothe her, "I'll be right here."
Toph's sightless eyes blinked, then tenderly shut to rest for the night.
Poor thing, Sokka mused in his head, she must be exhausted. He wanted to know what was wrong so badly - it was all he could think about as he watched her slowly breathe in and out, lost in the sweet relief of sleep. The only thing he could do was continue to stroke her small hands and hope it comforted her.
"Good night, Toph," he murmured, trying to make himself comfortable perched on the edge of the mattress. "I love you."
Honestly? This is probably the weakest chapter so far. Tragic. But don't worry, I'll try my hardest to make it up to you!
Thanks for you support and feedback so far, as always!
Have a great day.