I had gotten over my injury easy, it was the look on Gerard's face that left me standing in my place. He kept his eyes and head turned towards me while walking away. He stumbled a couple of times but kept his eyes on me.

Why was he doing this to me? He was trying to get me to care about him. Care about me care about him.

He's just a bastard. Why would he even hit me in the first place. I'm his fucking Frankie-fairy and he's being a total jackass about it.

God, listen to me for a change. Yet here he was walking away from me with the same look of worry.

"Gerard you freaking me out. Stop staring out there." Ray said grabbing Gee's chin and spinning him around.

"Sorry...I have some inspiration now though..." Inspiration for what?

We continued to walk through to the woods, nearing a small creak, as I could hear it slightly. Coming up to a small pond type thing and an even small waterfall.

"Heaven-on Earth..." Gerard whispered to himself. A guy with really long brown hair, I learned later his name was Bert.

Nodding, Ray grabbed out his backpack and withdrew a sketchbook and pad of paper. Then he ran over to a large boulder and pushed it to the side. In it wake was a small cave and that's were he brought out a guitar.

Looking back at Gerard he was already working diligently on the sketchbook. I sighed and sat down next to him, watching as he made an outline of what looked like a person. Bert just sat there with his own pad writing away.

"Ray, write this down." Ray nodded again grabbing the paper.

i "Hand in mine, into your icy blues
And then I'd say to you we could take to the highway
With this trunk of ammunition too
I'd end my days with you in a hail of bullets"/i

Have you ever heard some music that when you heard it, it was like a breath of fresh air? Or how your heart would just clench with anticipation for more? How during it you found it hard to breath and after you were panting as if you had held your breath in the whole time?

That's how I felt right this minute. Listening to Gerard's soothing voice turned into an even more soothing, however rough version of himself. It was as if I was seeing him for the first time now.

i"I'm trying, I'm trying
To let you know just how much you mean to me
And after all the things we put each other through and


I would drive on to the end with you
A liquor store or two keeps the gas tank full
And I feel like there's nothing left to do
But prove myself to you and we'll keep it running"/i

His longish black hair hung over his face in a sensual way. His pale skin was glowing in the early morning sun. His deep brown eyes, captured me yet again. But this didn't keep me from checking his body out the rest of the way. He wasn't extremely muscular, yet he wasn't fat. However he wasn't terrible skinny like Mikey, he was just right. Perfect enough to have a...well me, fit into his arms.

I can't believe I'm thinking this. He doesn't actually like me does he? He knows that I'm the tool he needs to be great. He knows everything.

"Gerard..." My whisper fell upon deaf ears as Ray swung his guitar around.

"Okay, and if I put this... " He played a couple easy cords over and over again. It was so slow to begin with but the cords put in made it all the better. "At the beginning and have that go over and over again. Then have bass have some different part like...this." He played the part made for the bass.

"Perfect, and the drums should be...like this." Using his voice Gerard re-created a drum and tried to create the part for it.

They spent the rest of the time doing this creating the whole song, fixing up the music and lyrics.

"I think it should be 'As snow falls on desert sky'" Gerard said, staying in firm place of his lyrics.

"But I just think that 'As tears fall and people die' would be just so much darker! And that way we don't seem like pussies!" Ray countered Gerard.

"Its not supposed to be dark! Its supposed to be romantic, its a fucking love song!" Gerard started to get more upset now.

"I get it know! You making this for Frank aren't you!" Ray exclaimed a smile replacing his upset features. For me? Why? Oh my god, is this about him loving me again? How can so many people be mislead?

"Shut the fuck up ass-wipe! It is not!" See I told you!

"Gerard, I know you liked Frank...a lot. But he's gone now...you have to move on. He wouldn't want a gay-nerdy-drunk-goth. Nobody does." Never have I heard someone like these guys talk about how they were unloved. Never.

"I...I'm going home now."

"Gerard, please don't go..." Ray started but Gerard started to run. I chased after him, I couldn't just leave him. I needed him with me, here to tell me it was all a lie.

"Gerard! Stop, please just talk to me!" After a while he started to realise he ran into the wrong direction and stopped. He started to laugh. It wasn't a happy laugh though. It was the kind of 

laugh you laughed when you realised nothing was ever going to change and you were stuck. It was kind of scary seeing him so crazy, yet he didn't stop.

No, in fact he fell to the ground laughing.

"Gerard..." My whisper was heard this time, for he stopped laughing.

"I wanted you. I wanted you so bad. I don't even know why, or how. But I did..." He started, "I wasn't very old when I had my first dream about you, ya know. It was when I turned fourteen. I thought I could hide it. From my brother, my parents, the world...you. But them Mum and Da left and I was alone to take care of Mikey. It just got worse and worse, my drinking. Soon I found you in my room...supposedly dead. And I had no idea what to do."

What was he talking about? Was he really in love with me?

I looked at his face, sitting next to his head. I realised how much of him I really liked.

For instance, his lips. How they just popped out off his face. How when he pouted his whole bottom lip would jut out. And how when he smiled they would be made smaller so that all his teeth could show off. I watched these lips I love so much as he talked non-stop to me. I don't think I was listening, or really watching as he went along.

I followed his perfect nose up to his eyes. They were just the perfect kind of brown. They just caught you and kept a hold as if you were in a spiders web. Only he wouldn't eat you he would just...kiss you?

I felt lips on mine. How is this possible? I'm dead, I'm a ghost. Yet Gerard...is kissing me. He didn't seem to mind that I was frozen cold to him. Or the fact that if someone were to walk by it would look really weird. However this stop didn't stop us from going farther. His tongue swiped across my bottom lip and I opened eagerly. Now I could feel other things.

Like his arms wrapping around me torso brining me into him. And my own arms around his neck to hold us in place as we fell over on myself. I didn't care about the ground, to me nothing was around me and it had nothing with the fact that I couldn't feel anything...except Gerard?

I could feel his soft lips move against mine, his fingers winding through my hair. I could feel ihis/i hair through my own ghostly fingers. How is this possible? How is any of this possible?

I needed to know, but nothing could change the want I had right now for him. And I had it bad.