~Author's note

This is personally one of my favorite chapters in Howl's Moving Castle. Don't worry, Sophie has a green slime fit later on, but boy, this chapter was fun!

I hope to finish this fanfic in three months. Pleas R&R!

Luvvie,

The author.

Howl didn't go out for a few more days, still thinking about Lettie.

"Did the girl give in?" Michael asked bluntly.

Howl pondered if he should answer or not. "A heart of stone. That's a new spell, Micheal, I don't believe that you've learned it yet."

Micheal gave an exasperated sigh.

Howl was busy in order to hide his discontent. First, Lettie didn't love him for some reason, and secondly, the king was on the verge of making Howl the second Royal Wizard, after Wizard Suliman.

At the bench, Howl enchanted things to fly, to scamper across the floor and even enchanted Sophie's needle and thread to weave a merry pattern on the thing that she was mending, and then unpicked itself. She laughed that time, and her rheumy eyes brightened. Howl was determined to make her laugh again.

Calcifer looked down at Howl's heart and was pleasantly surprised and evilly happy to see that it had enlarged. Another thing to tease Howl about.

An overdressed and over scented messenger from the king came, his powdered wig bouncing. Howl frowned. Did they have powdered wigs? Oh yes, some of them did, but most didn't. The messenger also came with an order from the king, which Howl said no to. But then he saw that Sophie was watching so he made his no wonderfully polite and long winded. Unfortunately, the messenger also came with a threat from the king. If he didn't do it, he would be Royal Wizard no. #2.

When Howl was finally certain that Lettie had forgotten entirely about him, he decided to head out. Beside, staying in the castle with the sarcastic and irritating, but lovable Sophie was getting on his nerves.

When he headed out, a young girl blocked his way.

"Hello, Howell," she purred. Her long blond hair was tied in two pigtails, making her appear sweet, but the voice was definitely the Witch of the Waste's.

"Hello, Fiara," Howl said cheerily. "Now-" His voice darkened, "-why are you here?"

"It's interesting, the fact that you're falling in love with a girl that I enchanted. No worries, she can't tell anyone about the enchantment"

Howl glared at the girl. "Why did you do that to her?"

"Because someone that I had formerly known, knew her. I don't like competition, Howell, and I don't like you." Fiara disappeared.

"Chilly," Howl remarked and swung up his guitar. It was silly, carting around that guitar whenever he wanted to see Lettie, but ladies like music. Unfortunately, he was an unmusical Welshman, but no one except for himself knew that, unless Calcifer told them. And if Calcifer did, he was dead.

Howl went to see the king and then when he came back, decided to see Lettie.

Lettie was talking to a girl with long brown hair and big gray eyes, with an attractive face that was nevertheless, plain compared to Lettie's exotic looks. "Carrie, this is Howl," Lettie said. "Howl, this is Carrie." She sounded less than excited when she introduced them, and she looked upon Howl with a look of distaste.

"Hello, fair, sweet Carrie. Is that short for Caroline?" Howl asked.

"No, it isn't," Carrie said and giggled. Howl instantly disliked her nasal voice. "But thank you. No one has ever thought that I might have a full name."

Howl courted Lettie for half an hour before a toy poodle attacked him and he left with a bite mark in his silver and blue suit. Sophie was mending his gray and red one, which was not his favorite.

The next day, Howl got jilted again.

"It's not that I don't like you," Lettie said uncomfortably. "But my heart belongs to someone else."

It felt like someone had shattered Howl's chest, yet he forced a smile. "Then I bade you farewell until next time, my dear Lettie," he said in a casual voice and went home. Ugh. No wonder Lettie didn't love him. A millimeter of his black hair roots were showing.

"Hot water in the bathroom," Howl said moodily.

Calcifer drew up the hot water and sent it to the bathroom, where Howl tinted his hair again. But he looked into the mirror and squinted and his eyes grew wide. His hair was not flaxen, or ashy blond, or golden. It was pink! How outrageous! How barbaric! How...Sophie.

Howl stormed out of the bathroom feeling very hurt. Why did Sophie do this to him?

"LOOK AT THIS!" he shouted, wailing with despair. "What has that one woman force of chaos done to these spells?" Howl said, feeling satisfied as Michael and Sophie whirled around with looks of dread on their faces.

"If you mean me-" Sophie started. Howl felt a surge of irritation.

"I do mean you! Look!" Howl shrieked. He sat down with a thump on a stool and bent over so they could see the pinkness of his hair.

"I think it's very nice," Sophie said softly.

"NICE!" screamed Howl passionately. "You would! You did it on purpose! You couldn't have rested until you made me miserable too! Look at it! It's ginger! I shall have to hide until it's grown out!" He spread his arms out. "Despair! Anguish! Horror!"

He made screaming things follow Sophie and Michael out of the room, while Calcifer screamed at him to stop, he's going to put him out. But Howl was too sad to think about it.

Lettie would never love him now. All because of Sophie. And Sophie hated him dearly. How depressing. No one loved him and his mother was dead! Megan was too cruel and he wished dearly that he had a Mari to comfort him. The spell covered him with green slime and he filled with despair. Green slime covered the room that Sophie had painstakingly cleaned. Good. She hated him, he would strike back. Oh, Lettie, Lettie, Lettie!

Calcifer was a cinder in the fireplace.

Sophie and Michael stormed into the house. Sophie's mouth fell open as she saw the slime and Michael's eyes fell on Howl with a look of horror.

"Save me!" Calcifer cried.. "This stuff is going to put me out!"

Sophie marched toward Howl, who could hear her footsteps. "Stop it!" she said. Howl smiled inwardly. "You are behaving just like a baby!"

"Is he dead?" Micheal asked, sounding horrified.

"No, he isn't," Sophie said dramatically, and Howl smiled under all of the slime, amused in spite of himself. Micheal and Sophie both pushed Howl into the bathroom, where Howl watched, curious in spite of himself. Instead of persuading him to take a shower, they just shoved him into the shower, clothes, chair and all. There, hot water scrubbed the slime off of Howl and Sophie marched out while Michael persuaded Howl to change. Finally, Howl came out with Micheal, clothed in the gray and scarlet robe.

"That was plain stupid!" Calcifer sputtered. Howl stared at him tragically. "Were you trying to get rid of the best part of your magic or something?"

To Howl's surprise and happiness, Sophie interjected that he was just having a tantrum. Of course, that wasn't a very nice way to describe him, but it was fairly correct. She shoved warm milk (in a cup of course) into Howl's hand and ordered that he drink. He drank.

"Now, what was all this fuss about?" Sophie asked crossly. The slime had been swept out of the moving castle. "That lady?"

"Yes," Howl said dolefully. How did she guess? And he wasn't going to tell her that she was partly the reason as well. "I left her along to see if that would make her remember me fondly. It hasn't. She tells me that there's another fellow."

Sophie looked sympathetic. Good for her, Howl thought. "She's the most beautiful girl there ever was in these parts," Howl went on. "I love her, but she scorns my deep devotion and gets sorry for another fellow." Howl got angry. "How can she have another fellow after I gave her so much attention? They usually get rid of everyone else as soon as I come along." Howl peeked at Sophie from the corner of his eyes and saw that she looked unimpressed and even angry now.

"Then feed her a love potion or something," Sophie snapped at him. Howl smiled into his milk. Time to give her a kick. Two kicks.

"Oh no, that's not playing the game. That would spoil all the fun," Howl said petulantly.

"A game, is it?" Sophie said, looking furious now. "Don't you ever give the poor girl a though?"

Howl finished the milk. He smiled again. "I think of her all the time." Kick number two. "Lovely, lovely, Lettie Hatter."

Sophie looked shocked and confused, which made Howl a bit happier. So he bade them good night and fell asleep until Calcifer woke him up again.

"Ugh," Howl groaned and clutched at his chest. Calcifer crackled with laughter. "Why did you wake me up?"

"Cause I wanted to," Calcifer said evilly. "No, actually, I need to talk to you."

"Why couldn't this wait until tomorrow?" Howl asked, checking his eyes in the mirror. Lucky for him, they weren't circled.

"Because, I want to know why your heart grew," Calcifer said evilly again.

Howl's sleepy eyes jolted wide open. "WHAT?"

Sophie gave a groan from her cubbyhole.

Howl cast a spell to keep everyone asleep. "WHAT?"

"Whenever you look at Sophie, your heart grows and you made pathetic attempts to talk," Calcifer said wickedly. "You look at her whenever she's in the room and when you're with Lettie, you think that she can't hold a fig against Sophie. Whatsoever, you are still in love with Sophie although she is old, so you're in love!"

"Go back to sleep, bozo," Howl muttered and staggered upstairs, releasing the charm.

But Calcifer had given him a lot to think about.

"Curse you Calcifer," Howl muttered. "I hate you."

"I know that," Calcifer said cheerfully. "Does Sophie?"

Whew! That was fun!

Love, Author