He had rehearsed the speech a dozen times in his mind, calm and cool in front of his own mirror, planning to pick the perfect time and place to deliver it. It had not been his intention at all to speak the words in one giant, breathless, word-vomit, two minutes before they were due to go on for their Regionals performance. Rachel had merely flashed him a tender, loving smile as they took their places backstage and somehow the words just burst out.

"Rachel, I know you want us to be more than friends, but I'm really into somebody else right now, and it's not about you, because you're amazingly cool and I'm glad we're friends, and I hope we'll still be friends after you hear this. It's just that I like you too much not to be honest with you, and I'm finally realizing why I've had so much trouble with girls and I think it's because I might be like your dads. I mean, I am seriously, majorly attracted to another dude, and all I can think about day and night is finding a way into his pants and showing him how much I want to be in his heart."

Finn cringed as he finally ran out of words, waiting for the tears and the outrage that would surely follow. He had fully intended to be honest with Rachel, but he hadn't exactly meant to say that last part. It was TMI for sure, not to mention maple-forest level sappy!

"Are we talking about Kurt?"

With that calm question, Finn knew that his chances of ever understanding the minds of women had just gone down the tubes. "Huh?"

Rachel repeated the question and Finn's brow wrinkled in confusion. He wondered if this was some sort of trick question. Was his answer going to tell Rachel if she should choose ranting or crying? Instead of an actual response, he decided to play it safe and just nod.

She smiled sadly. "I thought so. I'm not blind, Finn. I kept telling myself that I must be wrong, that you were straight, but you," she paused, searching for the right description, then shrugged. "You totally light up when he walks into a room. You have for a long time. What made you finally realize it?"

"Wait . . . so, you're not mad?"

Rachel shook her head. "One of my dads is like you. He was a jock, dated the head cheerleader, all the best straight-guy disguises, and all because he was afraid of being who he was. Then one day in college, he met my other dad, a boy who was out and proud, and they fell in love. Daddy came out and never looked back. I wish you could be into girls Finn; into me, but I can't hate you for being true to yourself. Not when you're just like one of the two men I love most in the world."

Now the tears did start, but they weren't angry, reproachful tears. They were tears of mixed sorrow and understanding and Rachel hugged him hard. Finn sniffled back tears of his own as he returned the embrace. "I love you, Rach. Not, y'know, like that, but I love you."

She laughed and produced a tissue from the bodice of her dress, quickly dabbing her eyes, careful not to ruin her stage makeup. "I love you, too. Have you told Kurt yet?"

"No, after today's performance, I think. I told him that I like someone and he thought I meant a girl. He suggested that I use our win at Regionals as an opening line."

Rachel laughed. "A little corny but I approve of his confidence."

The introductory music to "Faithfully" started playing and they quickly took their positions.

"Let's go out there and see if we can't give you material for one hell of a pick-up line," Rachel said, big brown eyes still glistening but oddly happy.

Happy for him. Finn felt humbled and grateful for her understanding. "Let's do it."

69696969

It was after 10pm before Finn and Kurt made it back to their shared hotel room. Their performance at today's Regionals, though outstanding according to everyone they had spoken with, had not been good enough to win, or even to place. They had come in third. Third place, and just like that, Glee club was over.

Quinn Fabray had provided everybody one hell of a distraction from worrying about the results by going into labor just as they finished their performance. The entire club, minus Rachel Berry, had spend the afternoon at the hospital. It had been a shockingly quick birth, but the baby was healthy, Quinn was healthy and plans were already being made to pass the baby on to an adoptive mother. It was a bittersweet ending, but a positive one.

Unfortunately, now there were no more distractions to keep them from thinking about the competition. Artie and Tina had proposed a "loser party" for everyone to wallow in grief together and commiserate over the triumphs and tragedies of this past year, and most of the club had leapt at the notion. Finn and Kurt had exchanged a watery glance and recognized that they would rather be alone with their misery. So they had made excuses and left.

Kurt pulled his shimmering gold tie loose and slipped it off, hanging it in the closet. Finn had long since removed his own tie and stuffed it in his pocket, popping the top two buttons of his black shirt so he could breathe easier. Finn sat down on his bed to take off his shoes, watching his roommate mechanically go about hanging his wrinkled dress shirt, smoothing the creases before placing it neatly on a hanger. Then Kurt simply stood there, wearing his black trousers and plain white sleeveless undershirt, staring blankly into the closet as if unsure what he should be doing next.

"You okay?"

Kurt jumped. "Sorry, guess I was a little lost in thought." Abruptly, tears filled his eyes and he whispered, "I just can't believe it's really over. I can't believe that we came in last! Losing to Vocal Adrenaline was bad enough, but to lose to a group of butt-kissing sycophants called Aural Intensity? That's just insulting!"

Finn rose and went to him, wrapping the smaller boy in his arms, recognizing the insulted ranting as Kurt's way of trying not to break down. Kurt resisted for a moment, then fell forward, pressing his face against Finn's shoulder and holding tight to his shirt front.

"It sucks. Everything about this just totally sucks. Us losing even ruined my plans for the perfect pick-up line," Finn mused after a few moments, bringing a startled and extremely irritated look to Kurt's face.

He stepped back. "Seriously? That's all you can think of at this moment? That some slutty cheerleader isn't going to have reason to be impressed with your lead singer potential? Gee, what a tragedy!"

Knowing that he was upset, and that Kurt always got bitchy when he was upset, Finn just smiled. "Who said anything about slutty? Last I heard, you were still a virgin."

Kurt's face wrinkled into a look of confused incredulity. "What?"

"I broke up with Rachel this morning. Told her that I finally figured out what's been wrong with all of my relationships. She was actually really cool about it; already a step ahead of me, as usual."

"Cool about what? What are you talking about?"

He smiled. "You were right all along, Kurt. It was girls. They just weren't what I really wanted. They aren't who I really want to be with. I tried to tell you over breakfast last week, but you thought I was talking about Quinn or somebody."

He kept his tone serious, not letting eye-contact slip and slowly he saw the message seeping into Kurt's brain. Beautiful blue eyes widened and that pretty, rosy mouth gaped open.

After a moment, Kurt gulped hard and begged, "Finn, please don't play with me. I can't take any more disappointments, especially not today, and I'm really not in the mood for jokes."

Stroking gentle fingers through Kurt's neatly combed hair, Finn deliberately mussed it up. He loved the sight of a tousled Kurt. "I'm not joking," he promised. "I've been waiting to do this for months."

He lowered his mouth to Kurt's and at first he did not respond, too startled to move. Then Finn slipped his tongue between those parted lips and gave Kurt's own tongue a little tease. It brought the other boy out of his daze in a rush as he groaned and threw his arms around Finn's neck, mashing their mouths together and seemingly trying to express an entire school-year's worth of pent up passion and frustration in one deep, desperate kiss.

Finn held on, grinding his lips against Kurt's and pulling their bodies closer, desperate to keep the other boy from coming to his senses.

At last, the need to breathe forced them apart and they stood there, faces mere inches apart, staring into each other's shocked eyes.

"Wait," Kurt blurted suddenly, stopping Finn's attempt to move in for a second kiss by yanking away and putting some distance between their bodies. "Did you just say months? As in, you wanted to kiss me before you moved in with me? Before you got all paranoid about sharing a bathroom with me? Before the whole redecorating incident?"

His voice was going a little shrill as he listed his questions, and Finn sighed, disappointed that his private daydreams of all-is-forgiven-now-lets-get-naked were not going to happen. "Yeah, way before, and I'm totally sorry about all of that other stuff that happened. I hadn't accepted the truth yet and it was hard for me. Especially with the guys at school all harassing me and you pressuring me to make a decision, even if you didn't know you were, and everything. I panicked! I didn't want you to know how much I wanted you, because I was afraid even to admit it to myself."

Kurt stared at him, studying his face, and he sat down heavily on one of the beds as if all of his strength had suddenly given out. "You're serious."

Finn sat down on the opposite bed. He sighed. "Completely."

"Wow. You know, sometimes I forget that most gay guys aren't like me," Kurt admitted, blinking slowly as he tried to process this amazing news flash. "I mean, knowing which way you swing from the time you're little. So, um, what finally clued you in?"

There was only curiosity in the question, no accusation, and Finn relaxed. "You did, last fall when you were on the football team. Do you remember the day, right before you left the team, when we had that really late practice? You were singing a solo concert in the showers."

Kurt's eyes widened. "I. . . I remember, but I was alone for that. I waited until everyone had left."

"Not quite everybody," Finn reminded him. "I heard you singing, wanted to tell you how great you sounded and I walked back without thinking. I saw you."

Kurt's face turned bright red. "Naked?"

Finn figured he didn't have much to lose. "More than just naked. You had put soap in your hands and you were, um, you know."

The other boy groaned and covered his face with both hands, flopping backward onto the mattress. "Oh, just kill me now."

"It was so hot," Finn continued dreamily, closing his eyes for a moment as he allowed himself to relive the memory. "I knew I shouldn't be there but watching and listening to you was like super awesome porn. You were making me so hard, I couldn't even think! Then you called out my name and I jizzed myself, right there and then."

Kurt had gone still as he listened to Finn's recitation, but at last he lifted his head. His face was still red and his eyes had a slightly horrified look in their depths but there was something else too, something Finn could not quite put a name to. "You knew what I was imagining doing with you, and it got you off?"

"Big time," he admitted. "Then you quit the team and everything else in my life kind of went to crap all at once and for a long time I tried to tell myself that it hadn't really happened."

"Denial," Kurt said blandly, sitting back up.

Finn nodded, looking down at his clenched hands. "I knew you had a thing for me, and I'm so sorry I put you through all of that, but I saw all the crap everybody gave you for being gay and I just wasn't brave enough to admit to myself that I might be like you. Or that I liked you back. Not until last week when I," he paused, unable to say it out loud.

But Kurt was not letting him off the hook this time. "When you what?"

It was Finn's turn to blush. "I spied on you again."

For a moment, he looked confused, gaze becoming unfocused as he tried to remember if he had recently done anything embarrassing and indiscreet. Then, realization dawned. "Oh my God, were you in my room?"

Finn nodded.

"I-I remember thinking that I heard something but then I decided it must be my imagination. I didn't want to investigate because I was," the blush flared even stronger than before, "busy."

"I didn't mean to," Finn pleaded. "It was late and I couldn't sleep. I went downstairs because I wanted to talk to you in private; to have this conversation maybe, but when I got there you were all naked and touching yourself and it was just so beautiful and hot and I didn't want to interrupt."

"So you just watched me? What the hell, free porn! Is that what you were thinking?" Kurt demanded, jumping to his feet, hands clenching. "I can't believe you! The first time, in the showers, that was an accident and it was my own fault for not making sure nobody else was around. I would be lying if I said I wouldn't have done the same thing if our positions had been reversed, but, my God, Finn you spied on me in my own bedroom! You just helped yourself to my private fantasies as if you had every right to do so! You stood there and watched me fuck myself in the very same bedroom that you didn't want to share with me two weeks earlier because you said that it was too faggy for you!"

He was shouting now, breath heaving with outrage, and before Finn could even try to come up with a defense, Kurt's right hand swung out. The next thing Finn knew, he was sitting on the floor, left hand clapped tight against an aching jaw. "Ow!"

"You hypocritical bastard!" Kurt snarled. "Why does everything always have to be about what you want? Did you know; did you even care, how much I tried to respect you by not looking at you in the locker room? Averting my eyes when you'd come out of the bathroom at home wearing nothing but your underwear? How hard I tried to ignore you rubbing out your morning boner every single freaking day before you got out of bed?"

"I'm sorry," he said, hanging his head in shame. "Really, dude. You're totally right and I was a jerk and you have every right to hate me."

Kurt huffed, crossing his arms over his heaving chest and glaring daggers at his meek roommate. After a long moment, he grunted, "Did I at least cause a few of them?"

Finn frowned. "Huh?"

To his surprise, a twinkle of amusement lit Kurt's eyes. "The morning salutes. Those have anything to do with me?"

Scratch never understanding girls. Clearly he was never meant to understand guys either. Apparently, a lot of yelling, a good punch to the face and receiving a sincere apology had been all Kurt required to get past his anger.

"Way more of them than I want to admit. I'm really sorry, Kurt," he added, just for good measure.

Kurt cocked his head, studying Finn closely. "That was a really douche move, you know, to spy on me. You kind of owe me."

"I'll do whatever you want," he promised quickly.

A sly smile spread over Kurt's lips. "Really? Well, since you're already down there…" Slender hands quickly unbuckled Kurt's belt and flicked open the buttons of his black dress pants. He shimmied his hips, causing the trousers to fall and revealing green boxer shorts impressively tented at the front. Kurt's righteous anger had clearly ignited another kind of passion. Challenge filling every word, he said, "Why don't you just prove it?"