Disclaimer: Not my characters.
A/N: Today I was depressed. So I wrote this. Just like that. In one day. Is it any good?
Song: Just be good to green - Proffessor Green
4. User
Oh dear God.
I dropped my head in my hands.
What will happen to me?
I rubbed my forehead, trying to rub the pain out.
Why was I so shy and didn't say no to Charlie?
I tightly shut my eyes.
What in Gods name was I doing back here in Forks?
My phone buzzed.
No, I'm not home.
I picked it up though, because I was a social person and saw that my mother was calling me. At six in the morning.
"Hello," I mumbled.
"Bella! How are you? It's so warm here today in Phoenix, you wouldn't believe it, while it's November!"
"You don't say."
"No, I mean it! This way my tan will stay until hopefully December."
"Hopefully." I heard Phil in the background. "Oh sweetie, I have to go. Have fun there, don't hate the rain!"
"Bye," I mumbled at the dead line.
I dropped my head on my pillow and slept for another hour.
I woke anxiously, feeling horrible. I felt so shaken and worried about something that wasn't even about revealing my real identity. Something horrible was going to happen today. I just knew.
So before I went to school, I emailed all of my friends the same mail.
To: Kelly, Jenny, Ellen, Tessa, Ashley, Alex, Thom
From: Bella Swan
Subject: :'(
Hi all of you!
How's everything up there? Here there's... mostly rain, of course. Nah, don't worry, it's cool. Though the worst bit is that I have to miss you guys.
Hope we'll see each other soon again!
xxxx
Bella
I hit send and bit my lip. Well, if I died, at least they knew I cared about them and had thought about them.
I grabbed my bag and put my books in it while I ran downstairs. Charlie was already gone. He always was. Today the dread was the worst. Something inside of my told me that my lies wouldn't last long.
Which was a big duh but still, I wish I'd never come here.
Ever so slowly and reluctantly I reached the school building.
And just as I was about to get out of the truck, it started to poor.
If a day has a bad start, it usually has a bad end as well, at least, with me that was always the problem.
I ran to the building as fast as I could and went straight to the toilet. The little mascara I usually put on would probably need a check up. Everything was fine though.
When I was about to get out of the toilets, Rosalie, Tanya and her other lemmings walked in. They were all pretty much glaring at me and I made a dash for it. When I went to the right, I had to go up the stairs.
Up there I saw the other Cullens.
No.
It was too late to walk back, that would look stupid.
They all looked down at me and I tried to pretend I was looking at something else.
That's so hard.
"There she is!"
I'm not she... I'm not she...
"Jane."
I am she...
It was Edward's voice, and even if I didn't recognized his voice, I sure heard the sarcasm just when he said my fake name.
All I did was look up.
"She's hot."
Jasper rolled his eyes. Edward punched Emmett's shoulder.
"Dude, you have a girlfriend!"
"So what?" Emmett asked, looking back at me.
I got the yuck shivers and Jasper laughed when he saw me get those.
"I'm not sure she thinks you're hot."
Emmett laughed out loud.
"Come on, guys, I'm just saying! Rosalie won't mind, trust me."
Trust me that she will, so leave me alone.
I tried walking past them, put Edward quickly stopped me.
"Wait, we need to talk."
I pleaded with my eyes. "Please, not now."
"Yes, know." He looked back at the two gawkers. "Fuck off."
"Jeez, thanks," Jasper said, rolling his eyes again.
"Don't let hem get too deep inside your pants, Jane, he's a user."
Edward snapped his head to Emmett, but he was already at least ten yards away from Edward.
I quickly turned back to the stairs and started walking down.
Run, Bella, run.
"Fuck you, asshole," Edward called back.
I was halfway down the first staircase. There was still one more after this one. I quickly glanced back to see Edward had just turned his head as well. I quickened my pace.
"Wait," he called exaggeratedly, running after me.
Leave me alone.
"You and me, boxing, after biology."
I froze this time a few steps before I reached the floor. He appeared in front of me, one step lower then I was and we were almost the same height now, him still being the taller one.
"Is that okay with you?" he asked, sounding as if the decision was already made and I was just supposed to agree.
He sounded condensing and slowly he stepped up on the same stair step as I was. One of his feet was beside mine and the other in between. My breathing hitched. There barely was any room this way.
"Teacher's orders." He smirked and stepped back.
"W-what?" I asked shocked.
What teacher?
Why this torture?
He flashed a smile. "We have to do this in order for you to know how to box."
The confusion on my face shouldn't have been more noticeable.
"For gym."
"I don't understand," I said, looking down.
"There'll be a contest in less the a few weeks, guys and girls separate, but this morning the gym teacher told me I had to teach you the basics."
What is this all about? Why didn't she teach me herself? And boxing! Why boxing? Who had come up with that idea? No other school did boxing.
"You?" I asked confused.
"Or Mike, but she found me first."
I closed my eyes at the misfortune.
"Do not worry, milady," he whispered. "I may be a user."
I opened my eyes and was attacked by the sharp green coloured eyes that were his.
"...but you sure as hell won't be bored when you're with me."
Sweet baby Jesus.
The wrongness of the things he was saying. Oh God. Shit, shit.
Shit! Just give him your real name and be over it already!
"I..." I took a deep breath. He had to know. Then he'd spit on me, finding it disgusting that he had said that to me.
He was staring at me intently.
"My name..." I trailed off again.
The bell rang. It was deafening because it was standing right behind us.
"Fuck!" Edward cursed loudly.
I stared at him wide eyed and he looked back at me. Something that resembled fury was in his eyes. I opened my mouth and stood there, thinking hard with my mouth half open.
"It's..." He leaned in closer.
Saying those words will mean the end of me!
I just couldn't.
Suddenly, one of Edward's hand was on my face, his thumb on one side of my cheek and his four fingers on the other cheek.
"You were saying, sweet pie?"
He stared intently again but I noticed how his eyes had lost all it's hope.
"Fine," he said, releasing my face and running his thumb quickly over my chin.
Shakily, I breathed in.
"Run, Coco," he whispered, leaning a little closer. "Or you'll be late for class."
I really had to figure out why he was calling me Coco, but first I had to ditch him after Biology. I tried walking down but he blocked my way.
My eyes slowly went up. He was grinning.
"I think your class is up," he slowly said, as if I was a moron.
I scowled. How would he know?
"Because a few minutes ago, you were going up," he further explained.
I stared at him like I was an idiot. And then the second bell went as well.
"Now look what you did," he whispered, looking my deeply in the eyes. "You got us both late."
"It wasn't my fault," I instantly said.
He scowled now, a little taken back. But then he changed his expression to a smile, one he rarely had given me when we were kids. Now, since Monday, he started to be nicer. That is, until he figured out my real name.
"No!" Rosalie shrieked. "No, no, NO!"
I looked back to see her getting hysterical on the ground outside. Slowly I stood up to look more closely what was going on there. That's when I saw. She had fallen and her knee was bleeding. She was wearing skirt and underneath that a thick black panty hose. They had gone to shreds. Was that why she was crying?
"Rose!" Alice called, running to her. "Are you okay?"
"My... my... my... new, favourite panty hose!" she cried out.
"It's okay, Rose, Mommy will buy a new one, she won't mind," Alice quickly rambled on.
"You," she suddenly said, glaring at me. She had tears running down her face, something which I didn't see often with these girls that hated me.
"What did she do?" Tanya asked from behind me.
"What did you now?" Lauren asked while shoving me. My back hit Emmett's front.
"Get off of me!" he said, shoving me as well. I was being shoved from one place to another.
For a moment, my eyes connected with Alice's and they looked concerned. Only the concern was not directed to Rosalie this time.
"What did you do to my sister?" Edward asked, appearing in front of me. He had grown a little, and it made me feel even more vulnerable, even though it was just an inch or two. I was seven and I had just stopped growing, while the rest grew.
"I-I... nothing, honestly!"
"Edward, Rose fell," Alice said. Edward's eyes flashed to her, then back to me. He gave me one hard shove and I felt backward in a pool of muddy water.
"Serves you well," he said while laughing out loud with Emmett, Lauren, Tanya and Rosalie seemed to be curing from her injury and got up, while laughing as well.
"It wasn't my fault," I mumbled, which triggered them to laugh some more.
Alice got up and angrily walked away.
I gathered all my powers to get out of the pool and run back inside, telling the teacher I fell because of my own clumsiness.
"I was only kidding, little one," Edward's much deeper voice said out of nowhere. My eyes flashed around until I found him.
He looked concerned. And I felt like my eyes wouldn't go any wider.
"See you."
He turned and abruptly left. I stared at his back, walking away from me quickly.
Once I didn't see him, I turned back and walked up. I found my classroom and apologized for being late.
Today, the hours were crawling and I was dreading lunch break, then after that Biology and I didn't want to know what came after that.
"Hey, Jane?" Angela asked. "You don't look to good."
I smiled weakly at the kindest girl I had ever met.
"I'm fine, Angela," I said. She smiled back.
The next few hours, I mostly put my head in my hands, played with my hair, looked at the split ends, whished I had a scissor so that I could cut them off and looked at the clock. All the rest I ignored. I was planning my ditching plan for lunch, Biology and the thing after that.
I exactly knew when the bell rang that indicated lunch and I sighed. Though I was grateful that Angela found me before I had to sit by myself.
"So, how was class?" she asked.
"A bore."
She laughed out loud, putting her glasses more straight. "They always are, Jane. Too bad you have a different schedule."
"Yeah..." That's when I remembered. "Hey, Angela? Do you have to do that weird boxing thing as well for gym?"
She nodded her head. "But it's cool, don't worry about it. Hey, Mike!"
"Hi," he said, sitting next to me. Tyler and Eric sat down too.
"Will you be telling Jane all the basics about boxing?"
"Sure, Jane, when do you want to start?"
I dropped my head on the table next to my lunch.
"Uh, you okay?" he carefully asked.
"This morning," I said, raising my head, "Edward was told by the teacher he had to do it."
"Ouch," he said, while starting to laugh. "Good luck."
I glared at him. "Thanks," I said sarcastically.
"When it comes to her decisions, you'll just have to comply. She likes giving students a hard time and you'd be amazed that she's been the fact that some people couldn't graduate, simply because she didn't give them a high grade for gym."
No...
"Seriously, Mike?" I asked. I was going to be one of those girls that wasn't going to get her diploma, simply because I didn't get a high score on gym.
Stupid boxing.
"And why boxing?" I asked.
"Cullen wore the clothes and she liked the idea of boxing."
"It all started there, because of him?" I asked in disbelief.
"Yeah, two years ago."
"Just my luck," I mumbled, putting my head on the table.
How would I get out of this one?
"What are the basics?" I asked then. If I learned them quickly now, I might not have to spend that much time with the demon.
"Uhm," he said, scowling. "Well, there's so much to it."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, there's a knockout and a technical knockout. There are many rules, and you could be disqualified if you don't follow those. There's a jab, a cut, a hook, a uppercut-"
I ignored the rest, because he in fact hadn't reassured me or calmed he. He had given me more reason to run to my car right now and go home.
The one in Phoenix, that is.
But it seemed like lunch was already over and everybody stood up, said goodbye and left for class.
I glanced around the cafeteria, seeing that the Cullens were slow as well in getting to their class.
Tanya pressed her lips against Edwards, just like that, and I swear she glanced at me, before closing her eyes and kissing him deeply with her tongue.
I also noticed how Alice opened her mouth and put her finger in it, pretending to gag.
That made me smile a little.
Edward started to get up, while Tanya quickly kissed him some more, but when he was the taller one, he stopped the kiss and quickly turned to walk away.
I dashed out of the cafeteria before he would noticed me.
Maybe I should skip class.
"Hello, my dearest," Edward said from behind me.
I glanced back, but didn't turn back around when I noticed a red smudge on his lip. I pulled up my lip in disgust and pushed my own finger on my lip and then pointed at his. He quickly brought his hand to his mouth and wiped and then stared at his hand.
"Ieuw," he said, looking in disgust at the redness that was now on his fingers.
He sounded like such a girl when he said that, and I tried keeping the smile off my face. He narrowed his eyes.
"This is disgusting," he said, showing me his hand.
"Eh," I mumbled, staring at his hand and then at his face. I scowled. Should I agree?
"Lipstick is foul. Don't everwear that shit, Coco."
I dropped my mouth. He had such a big mouth.
He brushed his hand on his pants a few times.
"It's like I'm eating lipstick," he groaned out.
I just stared like a baboon, and he smirked when he noticed me. He licked his lips and rubbed his fingers on his lips one more time, probably getting off all the last remnants of lipstick.
"She's not my girlfriend, in case you were wondering," he said, pointing back. "She one of the many reasons why people say I'm a user."
He winked and blew me a kiss. I widened my eyes, turned, and quickly ran off the stairs, going to Biology, where I would see him again. I was out of breath and in full confusion as I sat down.
After a few seconds, he'll be a few inches away from me, yet again.
~#~
She's so uncertain.
She's so afraid.
She's so vulnerable.
She's so fragile.
And I like that.
I'm selfish.
I'm starting to use her as well.
And I love it.
~#~
A/N: This is so scary! I came up with the idea of boxing, and now suddenly I see a serial and it's a guy teaching a girl how to box. Wow. Creepy. It's like I have a sixth sense :D hehe. But the guy is taken in the serial, by a blonde.
Today I had something that resembled an emotional breakdown :P I got back my scores, which were between the 3 and 5, which in America is the same as F's and in Poland a 3 and in other countries I don't know. But in one word: bad. So that's where the depression came from.
Next chapter will contain boxing, I'm guessing. I have big, big plans for this story :D