Chapter Three: Face it.
"You'll be okay, Elsa, there's nothing to worry about. It's just a presentation... with pirates, friendly pirates. You've practiced what you have to say almost a hundred times by now. Breathe. Just... breathe."
The captain of the Ice Queen gulped audibly, her throat burning as she did. Maybe the words had sounded right in her head, but as her voice echoed in the empty bedroom, the young woman understood that her tone implied all the alcohol that she had drank (hidden under her blankets, against the rule that she had made).
Pressing slender fingers against her temple, she tried again.
"It's only for today. It will be easy... I imagine."
Now her voice was somewhat confident, even though she couldn't quite pronounce the 'r' correctly. Still not convinced, she repeated the exact same words for a while, until her mouth was completely dry and anything she said had a weird raspy sound accompanying it. Elsa huffed.
"Positive, you already messed that up. Perhaps they won't mind if you look relatively nice, Elsa, and you know how to do that, at least."
Some shouts that she hadn't heard before rang in her ears. The young girl had been too focused hiding the remaining full bottles in her desk, literally screaming when one of them fell, shattering in a hundred pieces right in front of her nose. The sobs that followed after nearly shook her to the core, and she just sat there, looking at the liquor spilled over the floor. Gods, she was such a mess, crying over a damned bottle of rum.
As she got up, a sudden urge to stop the ship gripped her gut. Things seemed to spin around, and gods be damned, she hardly remembered how she was supposed to walk. Sensing how the waves moved her ship around, she walked where her wardrobe was supposed to be, extending her arms in front of her, trying not to spin around too much... failing.
"Found you." she mumbled contently after grabbing the wardrobe icy handles.
The smell that her pyjamas exuded was beyond gross. She had spent the latest weeks using only her night dress, and a smile curved her lips when she found just what she was looking for; a loose shirt that she had initially made for Olaf. After trying it on herself, scared that she would freeze him or something, she thought that it was going to be huge for the boy's small body, and erm... it was just a little bit big for her. The blue peasant shirt was so cozy that she kept it, and made a vest for the kid instead.
She discarded the night dress to the side and picked the loose blue shirt, some dark breaches that Olaf had bought somewhere, and a pair of simple chore boots.
Elsa had planned something. Lately, the Ice Queen's captain had found herself deeply interested in the daily pirate life, studying until her head hurt and her eyes were sore, trying to regularly use words of their vocabulary, mimic their expressions, and use their manners. After all, she was the pirate ruler, and she had to get used to their culture... her culture. Elsa desired to at least try once how it was to truly live like a pirate.
Some vacations in Frost Valley would help her loosing up; spend time with her crew again, meet other Captains, and maybe visit the library if she had free time. Yes.
So she was going to hide her ship in her castle's harbour, and sleep on it at night. Maybe, with Olaf's help she would look like a normal, dirty, simple pirate, without the fear of rejection that constantly followed her every time she said that she owned the cursed ship, after all.
Someone knocked her door weakly.
"Capn'?"
The young woman took a deep breath, trying to steady her voice. Her quartermaster had heard her many time before when she was really drunk, and now she really didn't want him to know that she had been drinking against his consent.
"Yes, Marcello? I did not expect to see you soon." Elsa ran a shaky hand over her locks, and with a little luck the pirate would think the grogginess in her voice was annoyance.
"I'll be leaving now, just had to tell ye that we're in th' castle harbour, m'lady. Olaf and I will be in th' town for a while, as me said before... Erik's in charge."
"G-good. Have a great time, you two." the young woman bit her nails, and as soon as the heard footsteps leaving, she got up. No, she wasn't going to mess this up. Too many times she had run away already. She had to know her people. They had to know her. Taking a deep breath, she leaned against the door. "Marcello!"
"Yes, Capn'?"
Elsa found herself in front of her quartermaster, which looked profusely confused, jaw hanging, eyes full open. Good gods. She was out of her chambers, finally.
"I will-" she choked in her own spit, and quickly covered her mouth with a gloved hand, surprised.
Marcello was shocked. Just what...? She had been drinking? And what was she wearing? The Ice Queen's captain had never been one to raise her voice.
"I will g-go with you... if that's not an inconvenience, of course. I would like to take some fresh air." she muttered, a wild blush tainting her cheeks. She never stuttered. It seemed like the captain was going to break some rules of her behaviour, surprisingly.
Under the piercing stare of Marcello, the girl began feeling self-conscious, and hugged her torso tightly. Maybe a peasant shirt was too much? Or her braid looked messy?
But her quartermaster couldn't agree more with the proposition, nodding as a jubilant smile spread across his face.
"Our pleasure, m'lady."
Okay, maybe this wasn't going to be that bad. Elsa felt a numbing confidence run through her veins when she walked out of the lower levels, receiving cheers from her whole crew members. It was like she had never left.
The revitalizing air of Frost Valley sent shivers down her spine. This was her home. She belonged here. The memories of other places drifted from her mind, rather painfully, just like the names of every person that she had met before being named Captain of the Ice Queen.
But as soon as she was off board, walking in her palace's gardens, it was like she had never been there before. Had she? Of course, even though it seemed like no one had visited the lonely corridors (and even lonelier flowers) of the captain's park in years. It was snowing softly, a light blanket covering the green of the mountains that surrounded the area.
Straightening shoulders, she continued wandering around the castle; walking up stairs, hiding in frozen bushes looking for any signs of animals (something alive, weird thing to do), robbery or visits from pirates. She found Olaf singing in the garden's centre.
After performing the proper greeting and exchanging meaningless words, the captain had to explain to a disappointed Olaf why she had chosen her clothing by herself... and her dignity began cracking.
"You want to act like a pirate, Captain?" he questioned, tilting his head to the side.
"I'm afraid so, Olaf." Elsa nodded softly, letting her head hang low. "T-those are my intentions."
A small pause, both of them fidgeted.
"And you want my help?"
Another pause, this time with a cough from the young woman. She seemed visibly uncomfortable.
"Well, I need it, if you must."
Olaf blinked quicker than usual, quite confused. The kid wasn't used to the sudden changes of mood of Elsa, something that Marcello had warned him from the very beginning.
"I'll help you, captain, of course." he smiled, doubtful, and Elsa set free a relieved sigh. Maybe things would work if he didn't ask too much about whatever was going through her mind, and just followed the flow. Okay, so the pirate ruler desired to act, well, like a pirate. Tapping his feet distractedly, he considered all the problems that the young woman was going to have. There was this one thing that they had to treat as fast as possible. "We will start with the basics. Firstly, captain, if you want to act like a pirate... your perfume is way too strong."
"Beg your pardon?" Elsa raised an eyebrow.
"Pirates smell, captain." he explained, a bright smile crossing his face. "Not every ship has its' own showers like we do..."
"They don't?" the platinum blonde parted her lips, surprised, before shaking her head, exhausted. "That doesn't matter. I want to act like a pirate, not smell like one."
"That's pretty much the same thing, right? Well, not important. You have the looks, at least... but, maybe we could buy a new hat for you, like the one that Weasel stole, the big one. Those are fancy; give this kinda bad guy vibe. But you don't that bad guy vibe... right." Olaf laughed, looking around like he needed someone to save him, when an interesting idea hit his head.
They were walking in the front gardens now, and as soon as they got to a puddle, the white haired kid grabbed a handful of mud.
"What are y-" the captain was quickly cut off when Olaf threw dirt over her clothing. Oh no, no, no, no. Her shirt was ruined; stains of mud over her chest and shoulders, and even some filth had landed over her head. "Olaf!"
The young woman stayed there, trembling from both anger and shame, without knowing what to do.
"Pirates will laugh if they see someone so immaculate, captain." the kid smiled, and when he turned around, Elsa threw a ball of mud right to his back.
The kid yelped, losing balance and falling in a pool of cold dirt. Astonished, he looked up, were the captain stood nonchalantly, smug as ever. A grin appeared on both of their faces.
Meanwhile, Marcello had already told everyone what they had to do while they were out; buy chocolate, rum, candles, clean up the castle, make the beds and of course, fix the little barquentine. With some luck, it would be as fine as before when they decided to leave.
The tall man walked down the massive ship with the tiniest of the smiles, walking slowly across the gardens, fingers grazing the handgrip of his sword. After quietly scrutinizing the outside part of the palace, he entered the stronghold. Solitary corridors, walls and pillars made of ice greeted him. Marcello always thought they were more welcoming than most people did.
His steps sounded like soft rings across the enormous construction, and he heard voices coming from the east wing. Unsheathing his sword, the strong pirate sprinted were the noise came.
He found himself dumbfounded for the second time in the day; Olaf and Elsa were covered in mud, running in the garden outside. Scratching his neck, he slipped through the window and fell outside, as graciously as someone so big could manage.
They didn't notice him at first, so he settled between some flower bushes, observing the unique moment that the pair shared. Marcello had never in his whole life seen Elsa laughing out loud. She was chasing the young boy and throwing balls of mud to him, hardly dodging any wet dirt that he threw at her. Olaf was having a great time, too.
But the captain seemed... joyful. Younger.
This vacation was definitely a good idea. Unless she found something to worry about, and gods, he wasn't going to let that happen, even if it meant that he had to stay up all night to solve every problem that her small town had. Elsa deserved to be happy. And if she was happy, her crew was going to be too.
After contemplating the pair playing for solid five minutes, they settled down, their tummies aching and their breaths uneven.
"How long are you going to hide there, Marce?"
The quartermaster got up fast as lightning, but there was no one to be seen. Raising a thick eyebrow, he walked out of the bushes... and a huge ball of mud hit him right in the face.
"Motherf-"
In a second, he was completely covered in dirt. With a remotely unstained hand, he cleaned his eyes. The pair was running away.
Elsa had her hair down, locks dirty and with branches trapped beneath, her clothing an utter mess and slimy with mud, almost the same thing happening with Olaf, his vest completely covered in dirt, just like the kid's hands. Marcello wrinkled his nose.
Then... vacations worked like that? He wasn't against it, at all. In fact, it seemed... nice.
Grabbing a handful of slush beneath him, he chased them, willing to take revenge. No numbers could count how many balls of mud they threw, laughing and forgetting about everything else. The trio didn't even notice that they were out of the castle now, running across the wilderness, until they got to the town.
Elsa was the first to stop, the laugh dying in her lips. Wow. Everything had changed with the years. Houses were taller, trees too, and new, modern constructions had replaced the once humble cottages. They even had a fountain.
The captain, unexpectedly, found herself pleased. Most of the population was inside their warm houses, having dinner. Some kids played outside, almost as dirty and soaked as them. A thin layer of snow covered everything, but it was going to melt soon, they had arrived to their destination after all.
Even though it was cold, like, really cold, every shop in the town had its doors fully open. Olaf and Marcello knew almost every person that lived there, and waved silently at the families inside their homes, and also the few pirates that were shopping groceries and stuff.
A group of young boys came to greet Olaf, and the same thing happened with the quartermaster, only they were big, ugly pirates.
Elsa just silently watched as they chatted with their close friends and acquaintances. Some of them nodded softly when they made eye contact, others not even looked at her. She was having so much fun, though.
After the crowd left, the captain sighed contently.
"So, this is how my city looks like." she muttered, a soft smile curving her lips.
The pirates hadn't even seemed intimidating. This was going to be easier than what she had initially thought.
"Ye look like a pirate, Capn'..." Marcello acknowledged, scratching the back of his neck with a huge hand.
Even though Elsa had always dressed properly, ragged and used clothing (clean, though), no one actually thought that she was a pirate, always too regal, too stiff... too royal. But in that moment, she could have been perfectly mistaken for a young cabin girl.
"I am a pirate, Marcello." Elsa stated, receiving shocked stares from her companions before continuing. "And please, address me as Elsa while we are here."
"U-understood." the older pirate furrowed his brows, nervous. The name had always sounded wrong in his mouth. He wasn't going to use it.
"So... what do you want to do, Elsa?" questioned Olaf, that clearly hadn't that problem, fixing his bowtie. He spun around with his arms extended. After so much time in a boat, you loved every second you were on land. "We can do anything!"
"Let's go to a tavern." she stated.
"What?"
"I would like to visit a tavern... for captain's duties."
"It's lunch time, Elsa." Olaf shook his head negatively. "And you said that if any pirate sold alcohol here, he was goi-"
"Th' captain said she want to go to the tavern." growled Marcello, pushing Olaf aside. "So we'll go to the tavern, period."
The kid looked up at Elsa, he needed further explanations, but the young woman had such a dark blush that he chose to bite his tongue and follow the taller pirate, that apparently knew where they were heading. After silently walking down street for a while, they got to what seemed like a broken construction.
Elsa and Olaf would have probably walked away if it hadn't been for the soft music that got to their ears. Marcello grabbed them both by the shoulders and pushed them inside the cracked door, even though initially Elsa seemed reluctant. The music once soft intensified, the messy lyrics a bit easier to understand.
"The tavern's back thar." the tall pirate pointed with his head to the hall, which seemed broken and unused, as they continued walking. The trio got to a heavy door that led to a diminute garden. Across it, there was a small, active cottage, replete with people, musicians, and (the aroma reached Elsa's nostrils) rum. Marcello grabbed apprehensively his sword. "Don't drink anything Jafar offers, and you better don't get too far."
Elsa nodded stiffly. Her elbows were nearly touching her ears, and all the colour in her cheeks had faded. Olaf gave the captain a small pat in the back, feeling tremors running up the girl's spine.
This was it, her first step towards forgetting her past.