Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Walking Dead'.

Iris

Chapter 4

Sighing seemed to be the thing for me lately. I felt like every time I breathed deeply I was then sighing afterwards. Even now as I play with Judith all I wanted to do was sigh. I smiled as the little tyke tossed around blocks and giggling at her destruction. It was entertaining to watch but my mind just didn't want to focus on her, it wanted to focus on Daryl. Ugh. I rubbed my forehead in frustration. Okay so I've sort of came to terms with myself that I was developing a crush on him, or I might have had a crush on him for a while now and it only just now made itself known. It was possible. Spending time out on the run for months brought all of us closer, if only for survival.

Still though it just seemed…wrong.

Not in the sense that he was so obviously older than me, but that I would develop something like this during such a time. Life was about surviving each and every day, not making goo-goo eyes at Daryl Dixon. Surprisingly I caught myself just the other day eyeing him over when he bent over. The man did have a nice butt. Ugh. Stop that! I sometimes wish I could just shut off my brain for the day, zone out completely and do my chores robotically.

Daryl told me to practice my shooting daily when I saw him at lunch earlier and when he bent over to pick up a can that fell off a table. He said he was working things out plus he has watch and would be going on a run tomorrow. I was eager to learn more but at the same time I was apprehensive of being near him at all. I don't want to have a crush on him! I just want us to be friends and learn something from him, that's it! Why did this have to happen?

Why me?

There really weren't any guys my age around here closest would be Carl sad as that is and he's only thirteen. Then there was Glenn as a close second but he's my sister's fiancé so that went without saying. Plus he's an adorable dork of a brother-in-law. I wouldn't trade him for the world, except when I want to talk personal stuff with Maggie. Fact was I didn't have many candidates to choose from around here so getting a crush on Daryl seemed so farfetched even for me. That is the last thing I thought would happen to me. Is it sad that the first thing I thought would happen to me is death? I'm only eighteen years old but I really didn't want to die a virgin.

Maybe that was it. I just wanted to have sex and then I could die without any regrets. Now that sounded pathetic even to me and I'm the one thinking about it.

Judith somehow chucked a block at my knee bringing me back to focus on her. I sighed then groaned. I need to stop thinking about him and I needed to stop sighing!

"Judy I need a distraction." She just ignored me and continued flinging her blocks wherever she felt like which meant I would have to be the one to go and retrieve them. I reached over to grab two just pass me and the one that hit my knee when I saw Carl walking through the common room. He stopped right next to Judith with a soft happy yet almost sad smile on his face. He leaned down and kissed her on her head. The way he acted with her was so precious but heartbreaking all at the same time. "Hey Carl." He looked up at me and nodded still not talking much. He must have seen my sorrowful eyes on him because he clammed up and his eyes went hard with a frown on his lips.

I watched him walk away towards his cell leaving us behind. I hated this, hated how much he had changed. Before I couldn't get him to stop talking, he was a nervous talker I came to find. When he was worried or nervous about a situation he would chat my ear off like it helped deflate him from feeling that way. I, myself, found singing to be my escape from being nervous or worried. It also helped others feel better if only for a minute or two.

Carl needed help and fast. I rubbed my knee absentmindedly it did kind of hurt from the sharp corner of the wooden block as I thought of how to get Carl involved with the other kids of Woodbury. I couldn't force the kid to do something he didn't want to do. Maybe I could get someone to befriend him first? Carl certainly wasn't going to come out and talk to any of them; he was still suspicious of them. The best course of action would be for me to branch out and talk with some of them. Perhaps that girl that looked to be Carl's age? What was her name? Wow I feel sort of bad that I couldn't remember her name, then again I don't even think I've ever spoke to her either though.

I'll have to fix that then, can't have Carol take care of all the kids all of the time. My thoughts suddenly came to a halt when I realized something extremely dire.

"Oh ew Judith, you need a diaper change."…

I felt like a child to be honest every time I touched the stupid BB gun. I mean they can't let me use a real one now? I know Rick had said he didn't want to use up ammo but…I guess there's no real debating it, plus I still wasn't the greatest at shooting but I still felt like a child. Daryl calling me 'kid' didn't help; especially when I have a crush on him.

I quickly got into the stance Daryl showed me. I loosen my shoulders so I wasn't so tense and brought my arms a bit closer to me just like he showed me. I stared down the barrel to the same plank of wood. I still wonder what it was for; I know for a fact no one put it up. Slowly I released a breath and pulled the trigger. I did hit it and much closer to head range. I just need to keep practicing cause ya know practice makes perfect. Hopefully soon I'll learn how to shoot moving things.

My eyes looked out over to the outer fence. It would be nice to have that area again. Carol wanted to make a garden for produce so badly and I can't blame her. Fresh veggies would be amazing after having only canned for so long. I wanted salt too. I chuckled at my whiny thoughts and took another shot at the plank. I kept going only missing once. I felt mighty proud of myself and I went to continue when I heard a sneeze.

I jumped at the noise and turned to look behind me. Standing there watching me was that same girl I had thought about introducing myself to. Well this was rather convenient. I smiled encouragingly hoping she wouldn't run off since she did interrupt my practice. She stood there with her hands behind her back looking everywhere but at me. Was I intimidating to look at? I'm pretty sure I'm not; I mean I'm a skinny, slightly tall blonde girl. That doesn't exactly induce nightmares unless I had telekinesis like Carrie White from the book.

"Hi." I call out. She finally looks up from the ground to see my smile and slowly smiles back at me. I feel relief that she isn't going to run off before I got to talk with her first. I felt like I was on a personal mission for Carl now. And I wasn't going to fail either. Failing was not an option. "Ya know I don't even know your name. I'm Beth." I walk up to her leaving a good chuck of space between us as I brought my hand up for a handshake. She looks at me hard for a moment, trying to read me I suppose before lifting her hand to shake mine. Jeez little girl has a big grip.

"I'm Lizzie." Lizzie huh? Cute, I wonder if it's short for Elisabeth like me?

"So what you doing out here by yourself?" I ask glancing around us to see that no one was in sight except Michonne. She was constantly checking the fences to be sure they were sturdy. I found that to be boring but if someone had to do it I was glad it wasn't me. I turned back to Lizzie who was now watching Michonne.

"Well I was getting bored and wanted some fresh air. You practicing with a BB gun?" I nodded looking the gun over in my hand. It was screaming child in my face. I bit the inside of my cheek. Daryl had been right; I was splitting my lip biting it constantly.

"Yeah, we don't have enough ammo to spare so I'm using this." Lizzie nodded eyeing it over.

"Could I try?" She asked me her eyes reaching up to connect with mine. I wasn't so sure I should, but there really wasn't much harm that could be done with the BB gun. It wasn't powerful enough to kill someone like say me but it would as my brother use to say 'hurt like a bitch'. Looking at her though I don't think I have much to worry about, she just seems curious and it wouldn't be such a bad thing to learn early.

"Yeah sure." She smiled brightly at me walking up beside me as I handed her the BB gun carefully. She weighed it in her hand for a moment, getting the feel for the weight I would know since I had done it myself. She then lifted it up taking aim at the plank like I had done. I watched her take a stance that was almost an exact copy of mine. That's pretty amazing that she could copy me so fast but then she could have been watching me for much longer than I originally thought.

Lizzie took aim and fired. It hit the plank but more on the left side and lower down. I could see the frown on her lips as she squinted at the plank like it faulted her. I had felt the same way the other day when Daryl was teaching me. A chill ran down my back at the memory of him coming up behind me and touching me. Ugh no! Focus girl!

"That was good! Better than my first try." She looked disappointed and annoyed but did brighten a little at my praise. I felt like a big shot here, an adult for once. I came up to her side and brought her arms a bit closer to her body like it was done for me. "Maybe if we brought in your arms more you can level the aim better." Lizzie let me direct her as I talked then I stepped back to let her shoot again. She aimed and shot. This time she hit more directly and further up.

"Yes!" She cheered turning to me with the biggest grin that I couldn't help but laugh and smile just as big back at her. There was nothing like accomplishing something that frustrated you earlier to make you feel better. It was a great feeling indeed.

"Great! You'll be doing better in no time!" Lizzie nodded enthusiastically. She then handed me back the gun.

"Thanks Beth, that was fun but I gotta go." Disappointment entered my chest. I barely spoke to the girl and I hadn't gotten to tell her about Carl. Just before she ran off I called out to her.

"Hey Lizzie!" She stopped just short of turning the corner to look over her shoulder at me. "You should talk with Carl, ya know Rick's kid. I think you guys could become good friends." She frowned, probably thinking about what I said. I think she said okay but she was too far away for me to catch it, she then turned back around and was off. I sighed dropping my shoulders. I hope she actually does seek out Carl but I wasn't so sure that would happen though.

I turned back to my plank/target to continue my practicing cause ya know practice makes perfect…

I'm not sure if Lizzie talked to Carl but I know I was gonna. I just came across him earlier being all mopey and he ignored me when I tried talking to him. Now this means war. Carl won't listen to me though which is a problem in that of its self. The only way I knew how to bypass that is with someone of authority.

Rick Grimes.

Smiling almost evilly at my plans I asked around for Rick. So far no one had seen him and I was beginning to wonder if he went down into the tombs. I heard from Glenn that when he was feeling upset over something or needs to clear his head he would wander the tombs or visit the place where Lori died. Seems morbid to me but if it gave him some type of reassurance or closure than who was I to judge right? I caught sight of Daryl walking away from the watch tower as I leave the gated stairway. I smile at him and he nods to me but no words are exchanged.

I feel dishearten by that. I know were not the best of friends, probably never will be but I had hoped for more than a nod. Beggars can't be choosers though, but I was still going to bother him anyway. I needed to find Rick.

"Hey Daryl have you seen Rick?" I ask just before he disappeared on me like usual. There were a few guaranties with Daryl one being he'll almost always has his crossbow on him or within reach. Another was that he liked to disappear in the blink of an eye; at least that's how it seemed to me. Maybe I'm just lucky that way. He raised an eyebrow before pointing at the tower.

"Just left him up thair now. Whatcha want?" I nodded glancing back at the tower. Good I wanted this to be private.

"Oh nothing just needed to speak with him is all." Daryl frowned but nodded and continued on his way. I forced the frown that wanted to make its way on my face into a little smile. No need to let Daryl's strangeness ruin my day, I am on a mission! I quickly ascended the stairs to find Rick standing outside with a rifle in his hands. He turned to me and smiled.

"Beth, what are ya doin' up here?" I smiled in return as I came up beside him to look over the railing.

"Well…I've been worried about Carl lately. He's so standoffish now and I was thinking maybe we should get him more involved with the Woodbury kids." Rick nodded looking out beyond the fences to the woods in thought. I could practically see the wheels turning in his head, I'm pretty sure I just succeeded. He turned back to me after a moment with his eyes much brighter than before almost at ease looking.

"Now Beth that sounds like a great idea. Carl could use more interactions with kids his age." I nodded smiling from ear to ear. I felt excitement running through my veins at the thought of helping one of my closest friends, even if he didn't want it.

"Exactly what I had in mind, I know Carl won't listen to me if I suggest him hanging around the kids but if you…convinced him too…" I didn't want to say force him but really that's what it came down to. Rick seemed to know what I was saying without saying it though because he frowned like he wasn't sure he could force his son to be social. I understand but Carl needs this, I don't want him to become like Shane. The thought of sweet Carl becoming so harden and cold scared me. I know this life now didn't bring much happiness but there's always hope, and I think Carl just needs to remember that.

"Carol has mentioned wantin' to teach the kids, keep them well educated and all. I could make it mandatory." Rick looked to me for encouragement which shocked me. It's hard to see someone who had been such a leader not too long ago suddenly look so unsure of himself. I really hoped the old Rick would surface back soon. We all need him back.

"That sounds like a great idea! It'll get Carl interacting with the other kids and hopefully it'll bring him out of his funk." The more I thought about it the happier I got. I felt especially devilish when I then told Rick, "I'll tell Carl about it then! You can set it up with Carol." Like I said earlier, 'this means war'. Rick nodded and I bid him good bye as I left him to his watch.

I knew Carl wasn't going to like what I'm going to tell him one bit. I decided to wait till later though to tell him that way I could collect my thoughts and he would hopefully be in a better mood. I spend the rest of the afternoon helping around the prison till I could get Carl alone. It wasn't official yet so I didn't want anyone else hearing about it. Carl was actually pretty easy to find too. At this point in the day when the sun was slowly setting I knew I could find him near the fences staring off into the woods like he was expecting something to come out. I stood further behind him just watching. Everyone saw how broken hearted and downtrodden Rick had been about Lori's death.

But I feel everyone sort of forgot about Carl.

I mean he was the one to shoot her in the head to keep her from reanimating. I did talk to him a bit about it but he just didn't want to hear anything or talk about it. I couldn't blame him but I wonder if anyone else bothered talking with him. I could never imagine doing what he did and not be scarred by it. He held up a good front but eventually it had to go down, eventually he had to face himself.

"Hey Carl!" I called out walking slowly towards him. He glanced over his shoulder but said nothing to me much like earlier. I sighed at the look on his face. He may not want company but he was going to get it anyway. "I need to talk with you." I continued coming to a stop just short of being next to him. I decided to give him some space so he wouldn't feel cornered or crowded.

"What?" He asked turning away from the fence to finally face me. He crossed his arms over his chest defensively and it confused me. Why would he feel he would need to do that with me? I tried playing nonchalant but he was so suspicious now it only made it worse in my case.

"So I was talking with your Dad and Carol's going to start a teaching lesson for all the kids." I gauged his facial features waiting to see if he figured out the relevance to him. He narrowed his eyes but shrugged his shoulders.

"So." Ugh. The one word answers once more. I shrugged my shoulders too giving him an impish smile, this time I wanted to make him suspicious. I know Carl's a smart kid, I wonder if he's playing dumb with me or worse thought I was dumb.

"Oh no reason, just that you're also a part of it is all." Carl had been looking down to the left before his head whipped up so fast I thought he might have broken his neck. He stared at me with wide eyes.

"What!? I don't need to be a part of anything!" I shrugged again inspecting my nails as he vented out his annoyance. Sometimes he forgot that he's essentially still a kid even if he didn't always act like it, then again that tantrum he's throwing really reminded me that he is indeed a kid.

"Look Carl it won't be so bad, it'll be good for you." I tried to ease his anger but it seems I only fueled it.

"I shouldn't be wasting my time learning math and English when it doesn't matter anymore! None of that works in this world! Why would you tell my Dad anything!?" I stepped back from Carl as he shook with this unexplained rage. I bit my lip ignoring the ache and raised my hands up in a calming gesture.

"Carl calm down, it's not that bad. You really need to start hanging around others your own age." The look I received from Carl could make milk curdle, it made me wince. I pulled back some more in case he lost himself in his rage.

"Who gave you the right to decide that Beth! I don't need you telling me what to do and I don't need to hang out with anyone!" I tried in vain to calm him down again but he cursed loudly making me blush at the intensity of his anger before he took off giving me the dirtiest look ever. How did me helping him out turned into me being the bad guy?

I watched him storm off leaving me in his wake. The thoughts of helping him and being so happy to do so left me feeling horrible and stupid. Maybe I should have left Rick to tell him about it? Did I really have any right to decide anything for him even if I knew it was for the best? I wiped away a single tear feeling remorseful for my actions. I could taste blood in my mouth from my lip and the irony taste made me a bit queasy. Today just wasn't gonna be my day.

I ended up eating dinner quickly and leaving Judith in Carol's care for the night so I could be alone. Carl wouldn't even look at me and it cut me deeply. I felt horrible. All I wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep but that would be too good to be true.

"Beth." I jumped at the sudden call of my name making my head slam into the top bunk. I groaned and whined rubbing my aching skull as I took in Daryl standing just outside my cell. He raised an eyebrow at me but did nothing more. I kind of wanted to tell him to leave me alone but I knew this had to do with my training so I bit my tongue and sucked it up.

"Yeah Daryl?" I dropped my legs over the side of the bed as I waited for him to answer.

"Tomorrow we can git ta movin' on yer trainin'. Ya have been practicin' right." He didn't ask me I noticed; more like stated it to me. I nodded trying to bring a smile to my lips but I couldn't keep the sad grimace from taking over. I didn't feel up to entertaining people right now least of all Daryl regardless of my crush. He watched me closely and it made me want to just bury my head into my pillows. "Somethin' wrong girl?" I shrugged looking over to the wall. Why would it matter to him? As much as it hurts me to think it I knew Daryl didn't really care about my wellbeing. At least that's how it feels.

"Nothing." I mumble in a soft, low tone. My fingers picked at the sheets on my bed as I waited for him to say 'okay' and leave me be. Daryl decided to do the opposite. I watched him lean against the threshold of my cell, arms crossed over his chest and looking at me dead on.

"I can wait 'ere all night." He commented trying to get comfortable. If I wasn't so upset or annoyed I would have laughed.

"There's nothing to talk about." I stated and I knew he knew I was lying. Jeez when did Daryl become a lie detector? Or has he always been able to spot out a lie before?

"Ya smell that? Smells like bullshit ta me." I snorted rolling my eyes at him as I too crossed my arms over my chest mirroring him.

"Fine." I hissed back. Maybe getting this off my chest will make me feel better. "I talked with Rick about Carl needing to socialize more and be friends with the kids from Woodbury. He said that Carol wants to teach the kids and it might be mandatory so Carl would have to join in. I went to tell Carl because all I want to do is help him but it…backfired. He's angry at me and I just feel…bad about it…" Daryl nodded absorbing my words as I spoke. I broke my arms away from my chest to fiddle my fingers to together. A nervous gesture I could never get rid of.

"I thank yer heart was in the right place, so ya shouldn't feel bad. Just give the little shit time. He'll come 'round." I looked to my fingers feeling a weight on my chest feel even heavier. What if he didn't come 'round? What if this was the straw that broke the camel's back? Carl and I were already on the rocks friendship wise, this could be it and I only made it worse.

"But what if he doesn't?" I voiced my question feeling my throat choke up. Tears welled up in my eyes as I looked directly at Daryl. He looked startled by my emotions and uncomfortable. He rubbed the back of his neck.

"Trust me kid, it's hard ta stay mad at ya." I frowned at his statement. What did that mean? Is that why he broke down so easily with training me? He couldn't stay mad at me for long. "Don't stress 'bout it. I wouldn't."

"Okay. Thanks Daryl." I felt a bit better, not much but a little was a lot better than where I was at. Daryl shrugged his shoulders before stretching his arms over his head showing off his muscular arms. A blush stained my cheeks at the sight.

"No problem, so tomorrow I'll come get ya." He turned before I could say anymore and left it there.

I laid back down after that and thought about what he said. It wasn't much but he had a point. I shouldn't stress over it, Carl would come around eventually. My heart is in the right place even Daryl knows it. I felt even better thinking about everything now. Carl was being a brat and I was being an emotional teenage mess. I stared up at the bunk above me as I thought about that last comment. 'Trust me kid, it's hard ta stay mad at ya' just rubbed me in a weird way. Not wrongly but…I don't know. I've never had someone say that about me, then again I've never went out of my way to make people mad at me aside from my siblings.

Maybe I didn't guilt trip Daryl into training me, maybe he had more heart than I realized. Either way him giving me advice and reassuring me was definitely an eye opener. I smiled and giggled a little as I thought, 'His muscles were also an eye opener.' I knew my face was red again and I laughed a little louder.

"Thanks Daryl…"…

A/N: Another chapter knocked out of the ball park! Yay! I hope some of you know that when Daryl speaks it may look like I'm not spelling the words right when really I'm just writing them in how I say them out loud. Down here in the good ole south i's end up sounding like a's and e's sound more like i's. Plus g's are none existent, lol! I kind of go back on my words and think about how they would be spoken that or a consult a friend of mine (if ya haven't figured it out I live in the south). I hope ya guys enjoyed this installment of my story. I really liked the interaction between Beth and the other characters especially Daryl.

As for Lizzie, I'm not sure I wrote her right or not. Again I reiterate that I haven't watched one bit of season four but I heard about her character and looked her up on the walking dead wiki. So please let me know if I write her OOC at any point. I know you can't get much out of here with how little I showed of her but she'll pop up more. Anywho thanks for reading, faving, reviewing, and following!

ALCzysz17