Chapter Four

Severus woke at five o'clock, showered, then dressed in his school robes. He crept past the sleeping Slytherins and left the deserted common room as he made his way to the Astronomy Tower. Though it was quite early and he was quite tired, Severus knew that it would be a mistake to be asleep when the other Slytherins awoke. It would allow them to have a position of power over him that he just didn't want to risk. The best policy was avoidance. The hour just before and after dawn was one of the only times of day he had for himself, just as the hour just before and after moonrise, though he would often stay up late into the night. The Astronomy Tower was where he could watch the sun rise; if he couldn't get into his classroom at night, he came here despite the cold. Severus adjusted his position on the tower until was perfectly aligned with the earth's orbit around the sun.

It rose like it did every morning, a radiant ancient sphere. Severus was bathed in sunlight as the mountains, covered by the gray of dawn were now illuminated by a sheet of golden light as it shot over the horizon. Out of the corner of one eye, he saw the sun reflect off the surface of the lake. Severus loved the rising sun, just as he loved the rising of the moon. He would never tell anyone this of course, they would just laugh at him; except for maybe Lily.

Oh how he wished she could join him, how he wished he could show her his world the way he saw it, with its limitless splendors and discoveries, but he knew he never could. If Lily rejected his love, what would happen to their friendship? No, there was no way he could let her know, unless…unless he could write her anonymous poems expressing his love for her!

When the waking bell rang Severus went down to the Great Hall and had a scone with a cup of tea. By the time he was finished and most of the students were just making their way towards the Great Hall. Severus walked to his Transfiguration class, and found that the door had been left open. He sat down in his usual chair in the back of the class, pulled out a quill and ink along with a piece of parchment and wrote:

My Love

You are my love

Red as blood, spilt for the cost of a rent rose

Hot as a dragon's fire, lit deep within my soul

Ever burning, never dimming

Is the love I feel for you.

The door opened followed by laughter, but Severus barely noticed, being so involved in his writing. Suddenly a hand reached out and swiped the parchment away from him as he was just starting to fold it. Severus looked up and saw Potter standing over him sneering down at him; he glanced at the parchment and his eyes widened.

"What's this; Snivellus has got himself a girlfriend, and is writing poetry to her!" Potter began to laugh as he said the word 'poetry'. Severus lunged for the parchment, but Potter jerked it away with lightning speed.

Before Potter had time to blink, Severus had drawn his wand and yelled, "Expelliarmus!" The parchment went flying up into the air towards him; he stretched his left arm up and caught it.

Potter drew his own wand, "You –" Potter stopped when the door opened again and Professor McGonagall walked into the classroom. She stopped as she saw the unsheathed wands and looked from Potter to Severus.

"Is there something you two boys wish to tell me?" She asked briskly, looking only at Severus, both her tone and stare accusing.

"No Professor." He replied, stowing his wand back in his robes. She looked to Potter and he shook his head, also putting his wand away. Other students had began filing into the classroom at this point, and James' and Severus' little scuffle had already been forgotten by the Professor. Severus took the piece of parchment and folded it into a tiny square then put it carefully into his pocket.

The late bell rang and Severus looked around the room for lily. She was not in the room. He felt slightly crestfallen as his plan would have to wait to be set in motion. Just as McGonagall was about to begin the lecture, the door opened and Severus's heart skipped. Lily came bolting in.

"Sorry I'm late Professor." She panted. Her ivory skin was as radiant as the early morning sunlight shining in her wavy hair as it tumbled down her shoulders. Even out of breath and perspiring slightly she was the most beautiful thing Severus had ever seen. With a pang of anger, he noticed that he was not the only one looking at her in that way. Across the room, Potter's eyes were fixed on Lily; admiring her slim and curvy figure. He knew Potter only fancied Lily for her body and could care less about her brilliant, engaging mind and personality. It angered him that the Potter boy would take something as wonderful and fragile as Lily, use her for his own pleasures, then toss her aside as he would a broken old quill.

"Ms. Evens, see me after class."

"Yes Professor McGonagall." Lily replied. McGonagall gestured to the only remaining seat in the room, which was next to Severus. Potter's eyes narrowed in jealousy and suspicion as Lily beamed when she saw Severus and sat down next to him.

McGonagall began her lecture. It was dreadfully dull and seemed to drag on for ages; he had already read and mastered the spells in this chapter weeks ago. Then suddenly Lily tapped him on the shoulder and handed him a piece of parchment. Severus felt oddly giddy as he read: "What happened to you last night at the feast?"

He scribbled back: "Long story, the details don't matter." He slipped the note back to her.

She stared at it for several seconds then wrote: "Did you get into much trouble?" Severus took the note and put his quill on the parchment.

"Snape! Evens!" The sharp voice made the both of them jump and they looked up. The whole class was looking at them and McGonagall was giving them one of her stern stares. She pointed her want at the note on Severus's desk and said, "Incendio." The parchment burst into flames. "Kindly pay attention when you are in my class Mr. Snape, Ms. Evens."

The Professor continued with her lecture and Lily sat up strait in her seat and began taking notes and watching McGonagall intently. Severus however, looked down at his desk and watched the note as it burned. He felt an intense urge to place his hand in the flames; as if in a trance, he moved his hand closer and closer to the fire. When his fingertips were just centimeters from the dancing flames, he looked at Lily and slowly withdrew his hand. He watched as the note slowly shriveled, and eventually, died.

Severus looked up, startled by the ringing bell. The students were collecting their things and putting them into pockets or bags, then hurriedly leaving the room, eager to leave the daunting presence of Professor McGonagall behind.

Lily however, left her bag where it was and whispered, "I'll see you later, Sev." then walked up to McGonagall's desk. Severus seized his chance and placed the neatly folded poem inside the charms notes for her next class; that way she would be sure to find it, then collected his bag and left.

As the rest of the day seemed to speed on, Severus felt increasingly nervous and his heart seemed to be racing the wind; he went to lunch, but felt to sick to eat anything. Across the room he noticed Lily talking excitedly to Mary and a few other of her Gryffindor friend, he assumed she had found the poem. With a feeling of uneasiness he saw Potter's eyes narrow as he examined from a far the poem she was showing to Mary. His eyes flicked towards Severus with an amused glint; this made him feel even more troubled than before.

It was finally time for Potions class, a class that the Gryffindors and Slytherins had together. Severus stepped into the classroom and saw all the desks in the class except for one was empty. Lily waved him over her seat enthusiastically; he walked over and sat down in the seat beside her.

"Did you get into much trouble with McGonagall?" Severus inquired.

"No, she just told me to not let it happen again. But look what I found in my bag during Charms class!" She reached into her took out the poem; she handed it to him and he pretended to read it. He thought his heart was going to burst; it was insane that Lily couldn't hear it skipping wildly in his chest.

"Uh, do you know who gave it to you?" he asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

"No." she replied. With a thoughtful expression she leaned closer to the desk and propped her head up with a hand; her hair swung forwards and Severus was bathed in her sweet scent. At the end of Potions, she left with a little wave and a smile.

A few hours later he found himself back in the Great Hall for dinner and tiny pang of regret he remembered the detention he had with Professor McGonagall in an hour. He scanned the Great Hall for Lily, but she wasn't there. Disappointed, he slumped himself down on the bench but wasn't particularly hungry, so he drank deeply from his goblet.

"Hi ya." Severus emerged spluttering and gasping from his pumpkin juice as Oz came to sit beside him.

Oz patted him on the back as Severus coughed, "What are you doing here?"

"Aw come on, is that anyway to greet a friend?" he asked in a mock affronted voice.

"We're not friends." growled Severus with a sideways glace at Oz. He was beaming with his red hair was just as messy and wild as usual. "Why do you keep following me anyways?"

"Because we are friends."

"I don't even know you."

"Well that can be easily fixed." Oz said, taking a handful of chips from the table.

"Well not tonight it can't, I've got a detention." said Severus, getting up as he did so.

"Aw that sucks. With who?"

"McGonagall."

"Man, that really sucks, good luck with that and see ya tomorrow." Oz waved as Severus left the Great Hall.

Severus knocked on Professor McGonagall's office door and it opened with McGonagall standing in the doorway, "Ah, Mr. Snape, you're here." she opened to admitted him. "Each night you will be doing a different task, but this first night, you will be doing lines."

'Lines. Lines! How bloody predictable.' He thought

"You will be writing, 'I will not cause trouble at Hogwarts.' Do you understand?"

"Yes Professor" Severus replied, then sat down in a seat and pulled out all the necessary materials for writing lines. And so the long and tedious work began, dragging his hand across the parchment over and over; as if this would change his luck or behaviour or whatever.

"Mr. Snape, your three hours are up, you may go." He leapt to his feet and practically flew out the door. His thoughts were preoccupied with all the homework he had due already as he opened a tapestry to take a secret passageway that would eventually lead him to the entrance hall. What he saw appalled him; Lily and Potter were wrapped in a tight embrace and kissing each other fiercely.