Girlman

By Winter Knight

Chapter 4: Mystery of the Catwoman

Note: I DEFINATELY do not own "Ranma 1/2", "Urusei Yatsura, "Inu-Yasha", nor "Batman"

I'm accepting ideas!

I finally saw "Batman Begins" on DVD and due to the action in this story and the Batman movies, and jokes only a DC fan could get, I decide to rate this fanfic rated T.

As for the explaination for Heath Ledger, his last movie role is the Joker in "The Dark Knight" I started this fanfic on the same day he died.

In Memory of

Heath Ledger

1979-2008

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Last Time: Girlman not only defeated the insane "mastermind" known as Enigma Kuno aka "The Riddler" but he didn't do it alone. His fiancee' Akane Tendo discovered Ranma's secret and he discovered her hidden dream to fight crime and end up assisting Ranma in crime fighting...but as the girl wonder "Tomboy"

Just as they hear reports of a strange criminal named "Ragdoll" making many burglaries, Girlman and Tomboy encounter a mysterious girl their age in a black leather cat suit and flowing purple hair.

The moment she sees Girlman, this "catwoman" and she says to him, "Girl in red pigtail must die!" Ranma then recognizes her during his training back in Jusenkyo and shouts in horror, "Oh no...not you...You followed me back from China!"

How will the dynamic duo deal with this mysterious foe?

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Girlman and Tomboy then see this mysterious "Catwoman" and then she suddenly attacks and Girlman catches her scratches and kicks, Ranma looks terrified due to a experience involving cats, but then Tomboy pulls out a mallet from either "hammerspace" or her utility belt and knocks her out the window and she vanishes into the night.

Ranma and Akane then take off their costumes and then she asks Ranma, "Who was she?" Ranma then falls unconcious and then Akane and Kasumi then take him to bed, Akane then says to Kasumi, "I think after two psychos in one night, it must have taken a toll on Ranma, I guess we'll wait till tomorrow for his explaination.

Ranma then keeps getting dreams of being kissed by a chinese amazon that night.

(Next Morning at stately Saotome Manor)

Ranma wakes up and is about to eat but then Akane and Kasumi wait for him at the table and then Akane asks, "Ok Ranma, who was that girl from last night, and why did she act like she knew you when she saw your girl form's pig tail?"

Ranma then says, "I hoped I never ran into her again..."

(Flashback in Jusenkyo during Ranma's training to become Girlman)

After Ranma voluntarily became cursed by "Spring of drowned woman", Ranma (girl form), Kasumi, and the guide dropped into a contest in a village of the Joketsuzoku (Chinese Amazons) They see amazons battle, Ranma was half starved and then ate a bunch of food while Kasumi then says, "Umm...I don't think that food belongs to you..."

Ranma ignores Kasumi but then the guide looks shocked at what Ranma is doing and then the table is smashed in half by a purple haired amazon...

(Due to Shampoo's inability to speak Ranma's language, the Guide translates her dialoge like this: "You, girl! I am Shampoo, I'm the champion of this villiage, you just ate my prize and for that I shall punish you in a form of a battle against me, there is no escape!")

Ranma then says, "You're on!" And then the two battle on top of a log, Ranma jumps back and swifly kicks Shampoo off the log. After the quick defeat, Ranma then sees Shampoo go up to her and she kisses her, The guide looks shocked as he grabs Ranma and Akane and they run out of the villiage and out of China as he shouts "AIYAA! Mr. Saotome, You have been given "Kiss of death"! According to Chinese Amazon tribal laws, if a female Amazon is defeated by a female outsider, she must give the outsider the "Kiss of Death", hunt her down to the ends of the Earth, and kill her."

So Ranma and Kasumi decided to go back to Gotham Ward, now that the training is over and they thought they lost her.

(Flashback ends)

Ranma continues. "and when they say 'to the ends of Earth', they mean it." Akane then says, "So you risk your life going after dangerous criminals...but you can't handle a Chinese Amazon... what is wrong with you?"

Ranma then says, "Well that was before I was prepared into the crime fighting role, but now I'm ready for Shampoo, I don't know if it's really her in the cat costume and performing robberies, but the next time I see her I will let her have it!"

Then a cute Chinese girl with purple hair shows up at Saotome Manor and she is delivering ramen to Kasumi and she says, "Sorry but the food isn't prepared yet so I ordered." Shampoo then looks at Kasumi and she says, "Where you hide pigtailed girl? Shampoo remember you!" Shampoo then sees Ranma and then she says, "You look familiar to Shampoo (puts hand on Ranma's chest) Man!" Akane whispers to Ranma "So she's never seen you in boy form before?" Shampoo looks at Kasumi again and says, "YOU HIDE GIRL FROM SHAMPOO...SHAMPOO KILL!" Shampoo pulls out her bonbori and is about to strike Kasumi but then Ranma yells out, "DON'T YOU DARE!"

Ranma stops her attack by kicking the ball off of her bonbori, which knocked her cold when it landed on her head, accidentally defeating her a second time. When Shampoo comes to, Ranma then gets kissed by her, this time she says, "You I love!"

Ranma is shocked by this but Akane had it worse, she seems maddened by this until Shampoo pulls out a booklet and then Kasumi grabs it and reads, "Chinese Amazon laws: If a if a female Amazon is defeated by a female outsider, she must give the outsider the "Kiss of Death", hunt her down to the ends of the Earth, and kill her. But if a female Amazon is defeated by a male outsider, then the amazon must make him her husband."

Akane then says, "O...k... and how can you read Chinese Kasumi?" Kasumi then says, "Simple, the booklet has translations!" Akane seems shocked by this and then Shampoo sees Akane and then pounces on her and it breaks a window. Ranma and Kasumi then go up to Akane who seems ok, but Akane then says, "I feel so refreshed... and who are you, Kasumi? What are you doing here?"

Ranma couldn't believe Akane seems to have forgotten everything about him. Ranma and Akane look up and they see Shampoo perched on a tree. She tells them, "Shampoo use special shampoo to make Akane forget and Ranma be for Shampoo's taking, if you ever want Akane back to normal... bring pig-tailed girl to Shampoo...Shampoo know pig-tailed girl is Girlman because of familiar pig-tail! Shampoo waiting... Wode Airen!" So she runs off and Ranma takes Akane indoors. Ranma eventually finds out that "Wode Airen" is chinese for "My beloved husband".

Ranma then says, Ok Akane, I'm Ranma Saotome..." Akane then says, "Everyone knows who you are, you're Ranma Saotome, a "irresponsible, superficial, millionare playboy!" Ranma then says, you know that was just a act...for you see... There are some things you wouldn't handle... Oh right! you forgot about my whole relationship with you...so I'll have Kasumi tell you while I take care of some very important things to do else where..."

Ranma then goes to the Girl-cave and looks up a file on "Ragdoll"...

Name: Ragdoll

Former Identity: Jakotsu

Powers: He is a skilled master contortionist, and hypnotist

M.O.: Former member of the "Band of Seven Gang", this criminal uses his abilities for burglaries. He is recently being rivaled by a mysterious "Catwoman". It is recently discovered he is a Okama.

Akane then comes down and says, "So you're "THE GIRLMAN!" But how? Why? And why did you make me wear this costume? And are you a Okama?" Ranma then says, "Like I said, I must avenge my parents and deal with criminals. Before he was murdered, my father had your father agree that we became engaged, then you discovered my secret that I am a crime fighter, responcible for lowering Gotham Ward's crime rate. AND I'M NOT A OKAMA! The girl form is a disguise for when I fight crime!"

Kasumi then says, "How about you take Akane to fight that weird criminal that is said to burglarize the Bandai Toy Factory tonight, I mean they must make a mint selling "One Piece" and "Ge Ge Ge no Kitaro" goods, so "Mr. Dolly" must strike there." Ranma then says, "You hate criminals just as much as I do, so maybe if you help me on this case, you will get your memory back!"

Akane then says, "Well...ok...but if you do anything crazy, then Arkham awaits." Ranma then says, "Akane...you won't believe how many prisoners there want a piece of me so that's not really a smart idea!"

So they put on the suits, Ranma turns into his girl form, and they made it to the Bandai Toy Factory. Then they climb up the building and enter through a window and they hear noises. Then they encounter a being dressed as a ragged lanky circus performer with a mask, he looks more like a orange and beige colored scarecrow.

Girlman then says, "Either that's a ugly new doll that Bandai is marketing or that's our criminal...give yourself up!" Then the ragdoll says in a feminine voice, "Looks like the jig is up, but let's see if you can defeat me first! Then he swings it's arms and legs in a lazy way at Girlman and she gets socked now and then, Girlman starts throwing her punches and Ragdoll starts bending in different positions when dodging the punches.

Then all of a sudden, Catwoman appears and sees Girlman. Catwoman then says, "Leave pig-tailed girl alone doll...She is Catwoman's!" Catwoman then grabs "Ragdoll's leg and throws it at a packing machine where Ragdoll is then being twisted and turned in the machine. Girlman then sees Catwoman pull out bonboris and is about to attack and then Girlman then says, "Shampoo I know it's you, Why are you doing this and being a cat burglar!" Shampoo then takes off the mask and says, "Cat is out of bag, Shampoo forced to rob from places to make new life in Gotham in hunting you...but now Shampoo find love here in Ranma! Now you die here!"

Tomboy then says, "Oh, now you realize those two are the one and the same!" Girlman then says while holding Shampoo back, "Like I don't need to hear that from a uncute tomboy like yourself!" Tomboy then looks shocked and says, "What did you just say Ra... I think I remember something..." Girlman then dodges Shampoo and says, "Forgive me Akane but I have no choice:

Macho Chick!

You're built like a stick!
Your face makes me sick!
Your thighs are too thick!
You can't even kick!
You're dumb as a brick!
You talk like a hick!
Your hair's a cowlick!
You itch like a tick!

Tomboy then gets extremely angry and shouts, "RANMA YOU JERK!" And she slaps her and then Ranma says, "Akane! You remember now! Now who did we fight last night?" Tomboy then says, "The Riddler... OH RANMA! I remember you (hugs him)...OH NO! I JUST REVEALED YOUR IDENTITY TO SHAMPOO!" Girlman then says, "Oh no! But it isn't your fault, your mind was just screwed up by Shampoo... umm where is she?"

Shampoo then says, "You lie! Ranma is man, and Pig-tail girl is Girlman!" Girlman then says, "I have enough of this!" So Ranma pulls out a emergency mini-kettle and pours it on himself and takes off his mask. Ranma then says, "Sorry Shampoo, but it's true, my female side is really a disguise for training and fighting crime, So either way, you would have to kill me anyway according to your laws...so what will it be?"

Shampoo looks so confused, she hugs Ranma and starts crying, then she walks off and says "Bie liao, your secret is safe with me..." Then she jumps off the window, Ranma seems worried until he notices she was jumping from roof to roof.

Tomboy then says, "Um Ranma, now that Shampoo knows our secret, isn't she going to get back at us?" Girlman then says, "I don't know, we know her secret too, perhaps when I revealed my curse and responcibility to her,

Soon they discovered a unconcious Ragdoll who managed to survive the machine and so they wake him up and he says, "What can I say? I'm a contortionist! I'm able to survive situations like this because I'm double jointed." Girlman takes off Ragdoll's mask and they find out that his alter ego Jakotsu is really a effeminate male! Girlman then says, "YOU'RE A DUDE!" Tomboy then says, "Holy "Crying Game" Girlman! But... we thought you were a female because of the way your voice sounds." Girlman then says, "I thought I told you never say "holy whatever" ever again, but since you got your memory back, I'll let that slide."

Jakotsu then says, "Well...you'd be surprised what you can live through. So where's that stupid Catwoman? she ruined my heist!" Girlman then says, "Well Jakotsu, you'll go to sleep and when you wake up, you will wake up at Arkham." Jakotsu puts his mask back on and says, "But I'm not asleep, why are you telling me thi..." And before Ragdoll can finish, Girlman punches him so hard that he is knocked out.

Girlman and Tomboy drive to Arkham Asylum and as Girlman drops off Ragdoll, Tomboy then says, "Sorry for the pounding and revealing your identity...at least Ragdoll wasn't around when I said that, I'm thinking about hanging up the Tomboy suit... also we have school at Furinkan High tomorrow..." Ranma then says, "But Akane, remember you said you hate crime as much as I do and I do need your help in this never-ending war. Besides, I consider you to be a great sidekick...unlike Green Arrow's sidekick Speedy... everyone knows he's addicted to..." Akane then says, "RANMA! No one wants to hear about that! Let's just go home and put this night behind us." Girlman then says, "But still, I don't think it will be the last we see of Shampoo, and her alter-ego "Catwoman"..."

(Arkham Asylum)

Ragdoll is then thrown in his cell like the ragdoll he resembles. But then later at night, he realizes that his cellmates are Riddler and Scarecrow and then the guard walking down the hall has the keys to the cells... It didn't take Ragdoll time to figure out his next move.

So he manages to slip past the bars in his cell and then grab the guard's flashlight and knocks out the guard till he became unconcious and then he grabs the keys. Then he opens up Riddler and Scarecrow's cells and says, "Hey, you want another chance at Girlman and Tomboy? Well boys, join me and we will seize the day!" Scarecrow then says, "Who's tomboy? And why are you dressed like me?" Ragdoll then says while putting his foot over his head to test out his skills, "Tomboy is Girlman's partner and I'm supposed to be a ragdoll, not a scarecrow, I wonder why do the police mistake me for you?" Scarecrow then ties two lit candles on his head and says, "Girlman and Tomboy are soooo going to pay for putting us there!" Riddler then says, "Umm Mr. Ragdoll, I hear someone struggling to breathe in a cell, let's get her out of there!"

The three criminals see what appears to be a a elegant woman in a icy blue kimono with icy purple hair, she looks melted and weak and she says, "Help...me... Get...me...out...of...here...or...I...will...die!" Scarecrow then says, "Her name is Oyuki aka "Miss Freeze", Girlman and Soun Tendo's daughter sent her here...hey waitaminute, Kuno, you know what Tomboy looks like, perhaps Tomboy IS that Tendo girl since she's in league with Girlman...so any information?"

Riddler then says, "... I don't think so, Akane is much cuter than Tomgirl, besides when I attempted to rob Saotome Manor, I actually saw Mr. Saotome, Miss Tendo, and they had Girlman and Tomboy defeat me... I believe that millionare playboy must have Akane, Girlman and Tomboy to himself!" Scarecrow then says, "So basically, your robbery turned out to be a social party."

The three release Oyuki, but then they see a fanfic writer who they find out is named "PCP Bongstone" and he says, "You guys are acting out of character! Except for Kuno... You're not supposed to do this! This Fanfic doesn't make sense!" Scarecrow then tells Ragdoll, "This weirdo thinks this world is a fanfic and we're not supposed to be criminals. All he ever does it rant about it and he won't put a sock in it!" Ragdoll then replies, "Wow, he truely belongs in Arkham Asylum, he's more crazier than you!" Riddler then says to Scarecrow, "Well if he annoys you so much, why don't you just use that scary stuff to put a sock in it?"

Scarecrow fires fear gas at "PCP Bongstone" and it creates a horrific hallucination of the Scarecrow's head on fire and he says, "PUt a SocK In IT!" PCP screams and Riddler stuffs a green question marked sock in his mouth. Scarecrow then realizes his head is on fire due to the candles. Miss Freeze then uses her power to put the flames out and she says, 'What were you thinking? You're wearing a flammable burlap mask!" Ragdoll then notices the tally marks all over PCP's arms and Riddler tells him, "Actually he does that to a part of his body whenever he makes a negative review of a fanfic. But don't worry, he used a black marker."

The guards show up and Riddler drops some green question marked balls that emit smoke and it manages them to have enough time to escape them. The four got out of the Asylum and they hide in a alley. Oyuki then says, "Can you boys do me a favor before we get our revenge on that strange person in the cape?" Riddler then says, "Ok...for "The green question mark shall fulfill the request of a elegant lady such as yourself!"

(Cobblepot Manor)

The four break into Ryoga's manor and then they see Oyuki's spaceship and then Ryoga and the Kabuki twins appear, Ryoga then says, "HEY! THAT IS COBBLEPOT PROPERTY! GIRLS! bring me my favorite parasol!" So they hand him a umbrella that fires machine gun bullets at them and then they manage to get inside the ship and fly off into into the sky.

Ragdoll then says, "Ok guys, now we're out of here and free, now's the time to plan our move against the dynamic duo!" Oyuki then says, "What do you mean by "we"? I'm going back to Neptune, that planet treated me harshly...however since you freed me you won't be leaving unrewarded! Here's a dollar for each of you in Earth money and I will drop you off!" And with that, Oyuki dropped the three into a desert Island and then the ship disappears into space.

Scarecrow then says, "She doublecrossed us! When I get my fear toxins upgraded I will give her such a panic she won't wet the futon, she will wet the whole floor!" And he says this while hitting a straw doll with a nail while he has two lit candles tied to his head. Riddler then notices a polar bear on this island and the three start running away from it, and they climb up a tree. Ragdoll then says, "Ok...this might not be as bad as Arkham but when we escape we will make sure that Girlman and Tomboy bite it... umm does anyone have playing cards?" Riddler pulls them out and they begin playing "go fish"

Scarecrow then asks, "Why do you have playing cards Riddler?" Riddler replies, "Well riddle me this straw-head, why do you...ummm... ok I have nothing to think of this time, I was going to use them for a riddle. Ragdoll then says, "Umm Riddler, why do you have these in the deck? I mean there is no use for a Joker in this deck!"

SO THE VILLIANS CONTINUE PASSING THE TIME BY PLAYING "GO FISH"... WILL THEY EVER GET OFF THIS ISLAND? WILL THEY EVER STRIKE BACK AT GIRLMAN AND TOMBOY? FIND OUT NEXT TIME, SAME GIRL-TIME, SAME GIRL-CHANNEL...

Yeah right! The next chapter is going to be something completely different and will introduce something worse than a new villian for Ranma to fight...a new FIANCEE' for Ranma to avoid!