Okay so one thing I would like to say is you guys (and girls) please read this cause I know many people just skip this part because they want to read the story and all. And I do it too but I always try to read what people have to say so PLZ LISTEN OKAY. So if you love this story I would like to recommend a Spamano story that you will love! I don't know if I'm allowed to do this but the story was really good and I want you guys to know about it. Its called Besame Mucho by George deValier. Plz look it up it's not finished yet but so far its amazing. Anyways, you probably want to get on to the story so hope you enjoy!

The truth is not always easy to accept

Once Lovino one out the window he ran at sonic speed not turning around once till he felt safe enough, even though he knew Antonio wouldn't be able to keep up with him. 'Why would Antonio chase after him if he didn't care for him.' He thought to himself. He stopped behind a tree that, wasnt to far but far enough from the house, to take a breath.

Once he looked over to the window where he dashed out he saw no one come out and saw no one running right behind him. He was quite upset by this. Wait WHAT THE FUCK I SHOULDNT C-CARE! No one cared about me to begin with and never has so what the fuck!? But he can't help this growing feeling of loneliness wash over him. I mean yes I've been alone all my life but Antonio was always trying to cheer me up once he found about my past. He even cried for me when he found out I was abused as a child. Yep that's right Lovino fucking Vargas was whipped and hurt by my parents. There really was no reason too!

They were always yelling and angry at each other. Guess that's kinda where I got my big temper and cursing words from. Then one day it got so horrible Feli and I's dad dumped our mother and she began to heavily drink. And it wasnt like and all sweet and Lovey dovey cuchie cue kind of drunk. It was a violent angered drunk. The worst part about it was that she passed out later after abusing Feli and didn't remember once she woke up. When I saw the scars she left on Feli I had to stop her. So I began yelling at her. But she wouldn't believe me. So when she got drunk she began hurting me. I was glad it wasnt Feli but she left marks on me.

Feli became so depressed and sad when he saw the scars. But I would tell him I was fine and they didn't hurt. I just didnt want to scare my Fratello. But one day he actually caught her abusing me and he ran crying into his door. He was in that room for 3 days straight. Only coming out to go to the bathroom or in the middle of the night to get food. That was when I decided when I was 16 id leave and take Feli with but when our mother realized the scar on our bodies were from her she committed suicide.

I can remember the funeral very well. Lots of people, some of which I didn't even know, were dressed in black with blank gazes. Most didn't even look alive. She was incased in a nice white well whatever the hell they put dead people in. There were white roses all around it. Feli was crying and Id noticed lots others crying. I felt terrible then cause I couldn't bring myself to cry. Not even my eyes could water. When we left the funeral Nono looked after us till I moved out and took Feli with me.

Feli always depended on me and I became so worried he'd leave me once he started dating the german bastard! Ugggh just thinking about him gets me riled up. I guess I really am not needed.

As Lovino had enough breath he began to run down to the lake. Once he got there he stripped himself of his clothes.

"I-I can d-do this, its n-not like anyone needs me!"

Did Lovino mention he was scared of water ever since the day Feli was drowning and he jumped in after him and once he got Feli on land he went back under to get something that he dropped.

And he'd got caught on something. drowning, suffocating. It was a horrible feeling. Lovino knew at that time he was either going to hold his breath and die or become so desperate for air that he sucked In the air. Being the impatient Lovino that he was he sucked in tons of water and blacked.

Feli ended up calling his bastard of a boyfriend to save him. How humiliating being saved from that potato bastard! When he awoke Feli was freaking out and crying. He told him self he'd never step foot it a big water source again but here he was about to jump in the water.

"I'm a worthless brat of a child thats selfish and doesn't deserve a l-life." Lovino shakily said as he started stepping in the water. Tears fell easily from his soft cheeks.

Antonio had decided to go through the front door instead of jumping through the window. As he rushed out the door he searched up and down and all around for his dear Lovi.

He finally caught sight of that brunet haired boy of his. He tried calling out till he realized the other was stripping down. He barely heard the shaking voice as the other readied themself to jump.

"No Lovi! Your wrong, you're not worthless. Te amo Lovi. I love you if you leave me i'll, i-i'll commit suicide."

"No y-you don't stop lying to me. Cant you tell I cannot take the lying any more! Cant you see that im damn well done with this hell hole! I just want to die! I want to leave and start my next life already. I was a mistake from the beginning!"

"No you're not Lovino." He looked seriously at his lover as he tried to inch closer to get the other away from the water.

"Lies!" He screeched and with that plunged in the water.

"LOVINO!" Antonio jumped in after the other but found it hard to find him seeing as it is the water was a murky green-blue color and it also was a dark night.

After what seemed like hours Antonio found a lifeless body and grabbed it to take to the surface. He made it to the surface and placed Lovino down on the sandy beach like ground.

"Lovino wake up! Wake up Lovino! L-lovino... wake... Lovino. You have to get up!You have to I love you Lovino. Your my heart! My every meaning for living! Dont leave me.." As he shook Lovino violently at some point slowing down from tiredness. Tears took over his face as he called 911.

24 hours later

Antonio waited in the silent almost deserted waiting room of the hospital. All he could do was cry and worry if they had succeeded in keeping Lovino alive. They had allowed no one in for hours and he was waiting impatiently for the results.

Feli and Ludwig were also there waiting for the results and Feli was crying more than he himself was. The only difference was Feli had Ludwig to hold onto and Antonio was by himself and on the verge of losing the one person he could ever want to hold like that.

Well that's Chapter 4 I hope I made you anxious!

Muahahah!

Anyways hope you enjoyed and Plz review.