As usual, R&R! Enjoy!

Chapter 3

Cartman's POV

"Dude, you have a vag!" Kenny exclaims.

"Umm..." I cover myself back up. Damnit! My secret is out! I've kept this secret for 16 years and now Kenny of all people has discovered it. This isn't going to end well.

"No use in covering it up, I already saw it!"

"Can I finish my shower now?" I know I have to be 50 shades of red by now.

"Hell no, you have some explaining to do!" He sticks his finger inside me. "Yup, it's real! Explain!"

I roll my eyes and push his hand away. "Hand me my towel."

He hands me a towel as I turn off the water and begin to dry off. "Nice rack. How did I not notice that before?"

"I kept them hidden." I put my clothes on.

"You're not even wearing a bra!"

"I wear baggy shirts so you can't see how big they are."

I notice Kenny looking at me from behind. "Damn, look at that ass!"

"Kenny!" I quickly cover up.

"You know if you lost weight, you would be hot!"

"So you're saying I'm not hot now?" I smirk.

"Do you want an honest answer?"

"Damn, it's like that?"

Kenny laughs. "Dude, please don't make me laugh! I can't wait to tell the other guys about this!" He turns to leave, but I stop him.

"No you can't!"

"Why can't I?"

"No one can find out about this!" I get down on my knees. "I'm begging you Kenny!" I plead with him.

He sighs and sits down. "So...how did this happen? I mean did you have a sex change or something?"

I shake my head. "I was born a girl..."

"So all these years you've been pretending to be a boy?" I nod. "Why?"

"My mom always dreamed of having a son. She started dressing me up like a boy since I was born."

"That's crazy! Dude, I have to tell the guys about this! Kyle won't be so weirded out if he knew you were really a girl!"

"Kyle?" I don't know why he mentioned Kyle of all people.

"Come on dude, are you still going to pretend like you don't have a thing for him?"

"Why would I like that stupid Jew? I don't even like Jewish people!"

Kenny narrows his eyes at me. "Really Cartman? So you're not checking him out when he's changing clothes?"

"NO! I mean, sure he has a nice rock hard body, tall, a handsome smile-" I realize Kenny is smirking at me. "Goddamnit!"

Kenny bursts out laughing. "You've got it bad!"

"I do not!"

"Yes you do!" He puts his arm around me. "Don't worry sweet girl. I'll keep your secrets, but it's going to cost you…"

I sigh. "What the hell do you want? Do you want me to do your homework until we graduate?"

He laughs again. "That's a threat coming from you! You suck at school!"

"Then what do you want?"

He thinks for a moment. "For starters I want money."

"For what?"

"My weed stash is getting low. It's hard getting money for that shit."

"That will keep you quiet?"

Kenny nods. "For now." He holds out his hand. "That will be $50!"

"What makes you think I have that kind of money on me?"

He laughs. "Oh please, your mom gives you a $100 a week allowance for doing nothing. Pay up or I tell everyone your dirty little secret!"

"All right!" I open up my wallet and grab $50 and slam it down in his hand. "Here, you poor piece of crap!"

"That's another thing! I want you lay off the poor jokes!"

"Oh well why don't you just cut off my balls?"

"You never had any…" Kenny smiles. "Do I need to inform every one of that?"

I close my eyes. "Goddamnit…" I whisper. I open my eyes and look at Kenny. "Fine, I'll stop with the poor jokes."

"It's a pleasure doing business with you, young lady!" He glares at me for a moment. "So I hope this will be your last time in our locker room…"

I'm taken aback by that. "Where the hell else am I suppose to go? I can't go in the girl's room."

"Figure it out! Little girls like you have no business being in the boy's locker room or bathrooms. Do you even identify as a boy? I mean are you planning to make the change at some point."

Wow, I never even thought about that before. "I-I don't know. I'm confused…really confused." I tell him honestly. I mean I know I'm a girl and I feel like a girl, but I'm so use to pretending to be a boy that I feel like a boy. I don't want to be a boy though. At least I don't think I do…

"All the more reason to stay out of our locker room!"

"Fine, whatever!" I'm not trying to argue with him out of fear of him revealing my secret. "I'll get my stuff out of my locker."

"Good girl!" He pats me on the shoulder.

"Stop saying that! What if someone hears you?"

"There's no one here except us, calm down!" Just then the bell rings. "There's the bell, you better run along. I'll be in touch with my next demand." He shoos me off and I leave. I'll admit I'm really nervous about Kenny learning my secret. Kenny gets high so much that he's bound to reveal my secret. I have to do everything in my power to make sure that doesn't happen.

Wendy's POV

Stan and I are making out on my bed. I push him away. "Stan, we're supposed to be studying…" I remind him.

"I'm more interested in studying the flavor of your lip gloss." He kisses me again.

Once again, I push him away. "Seriously Stan, I told my dad I would behave. The last thing I want is to be upstairs near Cartman."

"I don't blame you. What's it like living with him anyway?"

"It's ok, but there's something weird going on between him and his mom."

"Something weird like what?" Stan seems really interested.

I shrug. "Like they're keeping some kind of secret or something."

"Kenny thinks Cartman is keeping a secret too. He doesn't take showers or change in the locker room."

"Well that's a little odd, but I wouldn't think that he was keeping a secret based off that alone."

"True. I don't want to talk about fat ass anymore." He starts kissing me again. Just then my door bursts open and in walks Cartman. Stan and I quickly pull away from each other.

"God Cartman, can you knock?" I ask slightly annoyed.

He smirks. "Mom and dad said no boys in your room, remember?"

I roll my eyes. "He's not your dad! Plus they know that Stan and I do our homework together!"

"How are you working on your homework without your homework?" He continues smirking. I swear I want to wipe that fucking smirk off his face!

"Get out of my room!"

"I think I'll let mom and dad know what you and Stan were really doing in here!" He starts checking out my room. "I wouldn't mind having this room. At least I know how to follow the rules."

"Stop calling him dad! The only reason you can follow the rules is because no one wants your disgusting fat ass!" Cartman looks shocked that I said that.

"Wow…I guess you told me…" He walks out. Oh great, even though he's an asshole, I don't want to hurt his feelings.

Stan starts laughing. "I guess I better let you two handle that."

"Why me?"

"Only you could put up with him!" Stan kisses me. "Just try not to kick his ass!" Stan leaves and I head upstairs to Cartman's room. I take a page out of his book and barge in.

"You don't want me in your room, so I don't want you mine!" He snaps.

"I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. That was totally uncalled for."

"Pfft, bitch please! You didn't hurt my feelings!"

"Don't call me a bitch!"

"That's what you are! Now leave!"

I sigh. "Cartman, I thought we were going to try to get along?" I ask sitting down on his bed.

"Now you're sitting on my bed? I'm going to have to get some hippie disinfectant!"

I can feel my face turning red. "You know what? Forget it! I'm tired of trying to be nice!" I yell just before storming out of his room. I pass by Liane on my way down to my room.

"Is something wrong Wendy?" She asks me.

"Your son is difficult! How do you put up with him?"

"What did he do?"

I can't tell her what he did without getting myself into trouble. "It doesn't matter! He's just so…ugh!"

Liane puts her hand on my shoulder. "Don't let Eric get to you dear. I'll have a chat with him to make sure it never happens again! He has no right to upset you!"

I shake my head. "That's ok. It's not a big deal."

"Are you sure? I'll put an end to it now!"

"I'm sure, but thanks. I'm going to get back to my homework."

"That's good dear, you go on and continue to be great and get those straight A's! It's so nice to have a smart kid! I love bragging to all my friends about you!"

"Um…thanks! I'll see you later Liane."

"Bye dear!" I head to my room and I think about Liane's words. It's nice that she praises me the way she does, but I'm starting to think she may do this in front of Cartman and that's why he's such an asshole to me! Maybe I should tell her to tone it down. Or at least help Cartman succeed so she can brag about him to her friends. I bet that's the root of his problem…