DISCLAIMER: I usually don't put up disclaimers, but I just feel like it, so shut up and enjoy. By the way: I NO OWNEY AKATSUKI, NARUTO & COMPANY, OR ANY OTHER BRAND NAMED ITEM IN THIS STORY...
Like I said, shut up and enjoy the oocness.
"Chapter Four: Random Fire in My Pants!"
"Okay, is everyone here?" Konan asked, looking out at the campers.
"Yeah, now why the bloody fuck are we here?" Hidan-surprise!-asked.
"BECAUSE I SAID SO, ASSWIPE!" Konan yellled.
Pein shot Hidan a warning glance, and the silver-haired Jashin lover kept his mouth shut.
"We're going to have a bonfire every other night, with hot dogs, marshmallows, and smores. Once a week, on Fridays, we'll have a sleepover in the big house. The big house is over there," She pointed over to this huge mansion.
"We will play all kinds of fun games, and also once a week, on Tuesdays, we will have a huge party, with music and dancing. Since this is everyone's first day, we'll do all three in one night. Starting right now." The blue-haired origami artist pulled out a bag, and pulled out a huge stack of Hershey's bars, a box of chocolate graham crackers, and three gigantic bags of marshmallows.
Then she pulled out some hotdogs and fifteen roasting sticks.
"Here we go." She passed them out, and said, "We'll start with the bonfire. Then when we're done eating, we'll turn up some music and drink a little bit. Then we'll play sleepover games int the Big House, then drink some more, and dance, then we'll split up and go to bed."
"WOO!" Myoko said uncharacteristically, excited at the fact that she wouldn't have to endure this torture sober.
"UHNN SON!" Keiko said, high-fiving a stoic Itachi.
"Yeah buddy!" Rya said, pounding it with Deidara.
"FUCKIN SWEET!" Guess who? yelled.
Hidan, of course.
"Fuck yeah!" Teira yelled, grinning.
"Okay, everyone calm down." Pein yelled.
Immediately, everyone quieted down, though someone occasionally said 'woo!' randomly.
"Keiko, quit it."
"Aww, ohkay." She frowned.
"Come on, everyone dig in!" Konan yelled, and stepped back as the starving teens devoured the food.
After a few minutes, Hidan managed to catch himself on fire.
"AAAH! BLOODY FUCK! I'M ON FIRE!"
Teira laughed evilly, and began to roast a marshmallow over the fire on Hidan's head.
"TOBI IS A GOOD BOY!"
Finally, after Hidan was put out, and everyone had stopped laughing, they cranked up the music, and began to party.
Keiko, being a slight alcoholic, chugged the nearest bottle in a few seconds.
Her two sisters and their friends did the same.
Myoko and Ame were holding each other up while they laughed loudly at Hidan, who was yelling profanities at a very drunk Teira.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP, HIIII-DAN!" She yelled, slurrily.
"Oi, bitch, suck a dick."
"Naww, I ap-hiccup-appreciate the offer, though."
Keiko was hardcore screaming into an invisible microphone.
"THERE'S GOT TO BE SOME STABLE GROUND LEFT TO WALK ON! SO TEAR ANOTHER PAGE FROM THE BOOK! ARE YOU ASLEEP OR JUST ALONE? CLEAR THIS ROOM FROM YOUR LUNGS! PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER MAN! ON YOUR BACK!"
In Regards To Myself by UnderOath played in the background. A tipsy Itachi laughed, and played the drummer and singer, while his room mate was the screamer and guitarist.
"I SWEAR! IT'S NOT TOO LATE FOR YOU! IT'S ALL WORTH REACHING FOR THE HAND TO PULL YOU OUT!"
Keiko screamed loudly, while everyone just looked at her, confused, not understanding what she was saying.
"OI! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SAYING?" Teira yelled at her big sister.
"I'm hungry." Rya said, then put a marshmallow in her mouth and spit it in Deidara's face.
"Ha! I WANTED A CHEESEBURGER!" Rya yelled, laughing maniacally.
"Here." Deidara said, handing her a muscle relaxer to make her pass out and quit being annoying.
"What is it?" Rya asked.
"It's a cheeseburger, un."
"YAY!"
She took the pill and swallowed it with a beer.
"WOO!"
Keiko quit screaming, her ears hurting, and glomped Itachi.
"Hey, Itchy-bear!"
"Uhhhh..." 'Itchy-bear' said confused.
"I loves you, Itchy-bear!" Keiko said screamo style.
"Uhh, yeah. Itchy-bear loves you too, Kei."
"Yay, I feel loved!" She yelled normally.
"Let's all go swim! Or go in the hot springs!" Kisame said.
"Uhh, okay. Wait, where are Pein and Konan?"
"There's no telling." Myoko said somberly.
"Ewwie!" Zetsu aid hoarsely.
"Hey," Kisame said, turning to Teira, "Wanna float mahh boat?"
"Uhhhh... NO!"
"Okay, jeez." He said dejectedly, and turned away, crying big juicy anime-shark tears.
"Pus-say." Teira said, laughing loudly at Fishsticks misery.
Then they all seperated and went back to their cabins to get their swim suits on.
"GERONIMO!" Keiko yelled, jumping in with her tie-dyed swim suit, an orange heart on the left part of the top, and a lime green peace sign on the right side of the back of her bottoms.
Itachi waited for her to surface, before he jumped in. He then surfaced and adjusted his black, red and white trunks so there were no air bubbles.
"WOO!" Rya yelled, as Deidara carried her over his shoulder, in her white and blacked striped bikini.
He threw her in the shallow part of the pool, then jumped in himself, wearing light blue trunks.
"Yeah, hmm!"
"CHICKEN!" Myoko yelled, jumping on Sasori's back. Her red and black checkered bikini matching with the red of Sasori's trunks.
"YEAH!" Teira yelled, climbing up Hidan's back and sitting on his shoulders. She wore a lime green and black polka dotted two piece, bikini, with a pair of black shorts. Hidan wore baggy beige shorts, not wanting to find his swim trunks.
"I'm taking you suckahs down!" Keiko yelled, as Itachi helped her up onto his shoulders.
"ZETSU!" Ame yelled, calling for the freaky plant boy.
He came up wearing a pair of swimming trunks, one half was black, the other half white.
It sort-of matched with Ame's black and white one-piece, which had a dropping neckline that went to her belly button, before covering her skin. This showed off her cleavage, and Zetsu drooled, not from hunger. Surprisingly.
The sides were cut out of her white bathing suit, which was trimmed in black.
"Come on, Zetsu. We're playing chicken."
"Okay. Can we eat ther losers?"
"NO!"
"Aww, okay." He stuck out his bottom lip.
"Just a nibble?"
"NO!"
So Hidan and Teira, and Tobi and Kakuzu fought.
While they were fighting, Zetsu and Ame were battling Rya and Deidara.
Myoko and Sasori were fighting Keiko and Itachi.
Three winners were the three sisters.
Keiko and Rya battled, Keiko won, and then Keiko and Teira battled.
They both fell at the same time.
Kisame was swimming around underwater likle a mermaid.
Occasionally he woud pop up to the surface like a dolphin.
When they were done swimming, they pulled on clothes over their swimsuits, which dried by the fire, and went to the Big House- all except for Tobi and Kakuzu, who went to bed- where Konan and Pein were sitting around playing Beer Pong.
"I wanna play!" Keiko and Rya jumped over and began to chug the beer.
"I WIN!" Keiko the Alcoholic said, slurring her words.
"Truth or dare!" Konan randomly yelled.
"Dare me." Rya said.
"I dare you to... Kiss Deidara."
"Ohtay!" She skipped over to him and bent down. Right before their lips made contact, she passed out.
"Uhh, next." Konan said, while Deidara drug the unconscious Rya to the couch.
"Ame, truth or dare."
"Truth."
"Have you ever craved meat before?"
"Uhh..." She blushed. "Yeah. Once."
"Aha!" Zetsu yelled.
"Oh, shut up." She hit him upside the head.
"Okay. Zetsu, truth or dare."
"DARE!" His creepy voice yelled.
"Okay. I dare you to eat only fruits and vegetables for a whole month."
"NOOOOOOOOOO!" Zetsu yelled sadly.
"Fine." He finally said. "Truth or dare, uh, Teira."
"DARE ME FUCKER!"
"I dare you to prank call your mom."
"Okay!"
She pulled out her phone, blocked her number, and dialed her mother's number.
"Hello, Clarise." Teira said in a sinister voice when her mother answered.
"I think you have the wrong number. This is Shikari Nara."
"Oh, well WAZZZAAAAAAHP?" Teira said.
"Um, nothing Just trying to sleep. Who is this?"
"I'm watching you Amy!"
"WHAT AM I DOING?"
"You're picking your nose."
"WHAT? How did you know?"
"I'm in your bushes!"
"AAAH! CREEPER!" And her mom hung up.
"Bye mom." Teira said into the dial tone.
"Truth or dare, Hidan?"
"FUCK TRUTH! I CHOOSE DARE!"
"I dare you to go three days without using hair gel."
"WHAT THE FUCK?" Hidan yelled angrily.
"It's a dare. You have to."
"No."
"Fine then. I guess you're just a little bitch boy, who can't take the heat."
"WHAT DID YOU SAY BITCH?"
"I said you're a pussy." Teira yelled.
"Fuck you, I'll fucking do it, okay? Fuck!" Hidan yelled.
"Now ask someone truth or dare."
"Uhm, Teira, truth or dare."
"Dare me Fucker."
"I dare you to go streaking, around Kakuzu'a cabin, and find Kisame and tell him you want his fishstick."
"UHHHHHHHHH... FUCK NO!"
"What the fuck, bitch!"
"Erg, okay fine! DAMMIT, THIS FUCKTASTIC!" She swore as she pulled off her clothes, the girls watching with amusement, but the guys averted their eyes.
Except for Hidan, who just ogled the poor defenseless Teira. Pshhht, yeah right!
She whopped him upside the head with her headband, the metal hitting him in the eye.
"OI!" He began to swear, but she took off, laughing.
"Heyy, Kisame!" She shouted loudly, as Kisame stepped out on to his porch.
"Wh-wh-what?" He asked, bewildered at the sight of the naked girl.
"I want your fish stick!" Teira screamed, then, before the perverted fish man could make a move, she ran like hell back to the Big House.
"Oi, fuckers, where are my clothes?" Teira screamed, looking around frantically for her swimsuit.
Hidan stepped out of the house, and pulled off his cloak.
He quietly draped it over her shoulders, when she glared at him.
"I don't want your fucking cloak, I want my clothes!"
"They just gave them to Kisame. If you want them, you can go fucking get them!"
Teira frowned, but fastened the Akatsuki cloak around her neck.