Chapter 4

Yotuki

"And that is why I'm here, well, now I'm sleepy, I've been up the whole night, seeya, gramps."I concluded my story as I walked back towards Kazuma's room, I might as well be freeloader, as long as I get to have breakfast here, it's all good."Wait a minute, Forni[1]"

"Hey! I'm not that old!"

"You're a demon, you could be any age, for all I care."

"I'm only 19 for your information!" I Am, okay, maybe I'm actually 1900

years old, but too bad, I'm still pretty young for an ex-reaper[2].

"You don't look 19, you look around thirty."

"Oh yeah?! You look around, I don't know, A HUNDRED?!"

"I was kidding."

"Well I was too, then!"

"What's all the yelling about?" Kazuma walked into the room to see his dad and I arguing and pointing our swords at each other's necks. Yes, I do have a sword, not a scythe, I left that at the Dark Liege Headquarters. It must be lonely...

"I'm tired, can I sleep in your room, Kazuma? I don't have a place to stay right now."I stretched and yawned, I was telling Kazuma's dad what the he** I've been up to, and sacrificed the whole night so I wouldn't get my head chopped off in the process.

"Uh, sure, whatever. Just don't destroy my room, Nora's throwing a temper tantrum."

"NO I AM NOT!!!I'm just... You Know, sulking..."A voice came from upstairs, Nora, obviously.

.:around 3 hours later!:.

"G'morning, that was a great sleep." I stretched and yawned as I walked into the Magari Living room, I got my old clothes back and had the hood down[3].

"It's evening, Stupid Forni." A voice came from behind me as Mr. Magari walked out of his own bedroom. I brushed off the name and walked towards the kitchen.

"So, Gramps, what's for breakfast?"

"One, it's lunch, two, you're not getting any until you prove yourself worthy of my wife's food."

"Uh, and how will I prove myself worthy?"

"You beat my crew in an all-around sword fight."

"Easy enough."

"Then you have to beat me."

"Oh no, what shall I ever do? I'll never last a chance against an old man and his lackies! What sha-"

"Flattery won't get you anywhere, you know." Gramps pointed his katana at the door,"That's where the battlefield is, now get over there and lose against my crew and we'll all be happy."

"Uh, sure gramps, can I at least have my sword?"

"You fight without a weapon, and no spells, you seem like a strong demon, I don't think you're going to need your little butter knife anytime soon." Okay, that was just unfair, not like I needed it, if all his lackies are as easy as him to defeat, then this should be a piece of cake, pancakes, preferably.

.:At the Magari Backyard!:.

Hm. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 100. 500...

Around a thousand people were in the back yard(Don't ask me how they all fit. Because even I don't know.) And all of them seemed raring to go and beat me up.

So not fair.

Anyways, Gramps signaled his "crew" to start attacking me, one at a time attacked me, first a teen that held a massive machine gun attacked and charged at me head-first.

Bad idea, kiddo.

"Yaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!" The kid screamed and kept on charging and held up his machine gun, I heard the rattle of bullets and felt the ricochet of the bullets bouncing off the house's bulletproof windows. Remind me why they had Bulletproof windows again?!

I ducked and ran under him and kicked him smack dab in the chest, his eyes went out of focus as I kicked him down to the ground. He gasped for breath as he fainted.

999 more humans to go.

.:Two hours later:.

10 more people to go.

A guy with a bazooka, seriously, where do these people get these weapons?! An old woman with a cane, no comment on that. Two boys both with double-edged blades, they'll be easy to beat. Three of them with a huge claymore each, meh whatever, as long as I get my food. And Three others with ninja stars, no comment on those either.

The bazooka man knelt down on one knee and fired directly at me, I just grabbed with my hand, and sure, I got pushed a few inches, but I then flung it back at the guy with no hesitation, it landed right in front of him and shattered the earth around it, sending him flying onto a pile of other bazooka users. The old woman jumped into the air and whipped the cane towards me, whipping through the air, where the cane used to be was a mace now. The bottom of the can came flying past me and apparently had blades jutting out of them. Great, a crazy old cat lady.

I jerked the chain that connected the two parts of the cane and the lady came down with a cloud of dust exploding into the orange sky, of course, I made sure she didn't die of the fall, no killing today!

The last six just somehow disappeared. Ninnies.

I heard clapping behind me to see Kazuma's dad grinning. "It's my turn..." He pulled out his katana and tested it out with a few practice swings. "Well? Gimme all you got, gramps." I crouched into a defensive position and...

"Honey? The cookies are ready! Come and bring our guest inside for a snack!" Mrs. Magari leaned out the glass back door and smiled innocently. Yay, free cookies! I hope they're sugar cookies...

.:In the Magari table:.

"Finally! Something to eat!" I cheered and grabbed a cookie from the platter, as I hoped, they were sugar cookies. Gramps looked peeved, letting me eat and all without fighting me. He would've gotten seriously injured anyways.

"Why is a demon dancing over a mere sugar cookie?" Kazuma's voice startled me as I turned around and saw Nora and Kazuma looking weirdly at me. "Uh, I don't know." I settled down and nibbled at the cookie. "We did our research on you Yotuki, an-"

"You mean, you talked to the Dark Liege?"I asked, and went back to nibbling the sweet, sweet sugar cookie.

"Uh, yeah, and how did you know that?" The Dark Liege is calling me right now. Or at least will in 5, 4, 3, 2..."

Ring~

The chime of my aqua green cellphone notifying I had a caller suddenly piped up, "Oh, look, it's the Dark Liege, oi, mutt, here, catch." I tossed it to Nora and he answered it...

"Helllllooooooo3 How's my favorite toy?" I'm amazed she still calls me that.

"I'm fine, thanks." I yelled so she could hear me. Nora looked annoyed at the voice of The Dark Liege just reaching his ears. He had enough of the voice blaring in his ear to last a lifetime as he listened to the Dark Liege babbled on with her memories of me when I was still there, I just watched him get more and more agitated until he chucked the phone at the ground and screamed "Stop talking for at least one second, Ugly!"

"Nora?! You were listening the whole time?"

"No, I think he zoned out the first few seconds."Kazuma picked up the phone and asked her Hellishness a few questions...

"Well, that was eventful." I smiled as I attempted to grab another cookie only to get my hand slapped away. "You only get one free cookie, not until you beat me."

"Fine, how about we play rock paper scissors?"

"Fair enough."

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!"

I had rock, he had scissors.

"Ha! In you face, Gramps!" I grinned and did a victory dance around the kitchen.

"Fine, but I'm not letting you be a freeloader. You're going to protect Kazuma from other, stronger demons. Nora obviously can't beat up some of the Resistance members. So now it's your other job." Darn, no freeloading then.

"Oh, and you can help cook." Oh, I'm fine with that. I get to raid the fridge.

"Yes sir!" I saluted.

He just sighed and walked back to his bedroom.

"Well, Kazuma, guess you're stuck with me for now!"I grinned and he just looked like he saw the Devil. Heh, then again, maybe I shouldn't flatter myself so much...

^~*~^

Heh, poor Kazuma.

[1]~Forni means Ancient one in old Norse.

[2]~Reapers age RRRRRREEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYy slowly

[3]~I never did describe what she wears, look for a description on the next chapter, 'cuz I'm too lazy and I'm going to Target, so when I get back, I'll start on chapter 5!!!

^~*~^

Heh, poor Kazuma(again).

Will you guys ever find out the story behind Yotuki's escapade?!

Will Rivan ever get an Axicle?

Will I ever get paid for this?!(the answer's no.)

Will Yotuki Ever come back to the DLA?

And Yotuki Ever get free food?

All of this answered in the upcoming chapters!!!