My Life As A Peanut

Chapter 4: Party Day

So my impressions of this new neighborhood were getting better and better,and it only came from 3 people,2 of which weren't even human. Snoopy,Woodstock,and Charlie Brown for how little time I knew them,made me feel like I had some legit friends again. I don't know if I've mentioned this before,but I wasn't exactly the most popular growing up. Aside from my very short lived band,all I had was Stan and even then he wasn't human,so to see someone who was like me made me feel good,but they were only 3 of what I could guess was around 16 other kids,and party day was getting closer.

Just to get things out of the way,I should have planned my party a lot better ahead of time,because at first I was just expecting it to be a interment get together to get me acquainted with the neighborhood,but that all changed one morning. I was sitting on the couch watching TV when I decided to see what was trending on my social media sites,since I like to keep up to date on that kind of stuff. It all seemed to be fine and dandy until I saw a hashtag that made me spit my drink of water out.

"#MoralosParty." I said to myself in sheer confusion as I looked through the tweets and posts about it,and there were a LOT of posts about it,almost an entire schools worth of kids were talking about how they were coming over to my house.

I started to hyperventilate at the idea of this many people coming over,and I soon fainted on the carpet until Stan woke me up with a glass of water. I shot wide awake and after remembering what I had just seen,that's when I got up and decided to see if Charlie Brown knew anything about this. I dashed over to my old house phone that was on the dresser and quickly turned the dial until it reached his house's phone number.

"Pick up,pick up,pick up,pick,up." I nervously stammered over and over until I finally heard the familiar click that signaled that someone picked it up and was about to answer. However I would become more confused than anything when I heard the voice of a younger girl answer the phone instead as she excitingly greeted me "Hello there!"

"Oh uh…..hello there…...little….girl. My name is Alex and I'm asking for Charlie Brown please?" I nervously greeted her back with a smile until she yelled "Big brother! That dork next door Alex on the phone wants to talk to you!"

"Hey I'm not a dork!" I retorted hoping for her to answer but I heard nothing on the other end,as if she left the phone hanging there until Charlie Brown shortly arrived.

"Hi Alex,sorry about that,my sister Sally really likes to answer for us no matter who it is." Charlie Brown chuckled when he finally picked up the phone to which I replied "Your sister? Oh never mind that,what I want to talk about is why I'm suddenly seeing people everywhere talking about my party. And how the entire school is suddenly coming,did you blab it out to the whole school?"

"No it wasn't me,uhhh….it must have been one of the others. Probably Violet since she really likes to throw and hype up parties." Charlie Brown calmly replied with a somewhat shaky tone before I quickly shot back "Well you can tell Violet or whoever the heck it was that aside from the party,they're on my crap list. I can't have an entire school over,but I can't just cancel the thing since it's tomorrow!"

"What about an entire school?" I jumped and my stomach churned when I heard my mom intrude on our conversation as I slammed the phone down and nervously replied "Nothing mom."

I turned around with a nervous smile hoping for my mom to be fooled,but she saw right through my lie and sarcastically replied "Oh yeah,and Mickey Mouse is gonna become a terrorist,what's really going on?"

I hung my head in annoyance and defeat before I told her the truth "Please don't turn me into a pretzel,but it turns out that it's not gonna be just me and Charlie Brown's friends coming over. Now his entire school is coming over thanks to one of his friends blabbing it out like a monkey,and I don't know what to do now!"

"Calm down Alex,calm down. You'll think of something." Mom reassured me in a calmly and comforting voice when she saw how nervous I was,but I was more confused than anything else as I asked "What? You're not gonna help me?"

"Sorry Alex,I'd love to,but I have to leave town for a few days because of a business trip,and I have to be at the airport very soon. I will be back the night after the party." Mom clarified as my jaw dropped at the sudden realization,and I felt like I was about to faint again but Stan held me up before I remarked "Well great,I have a bajillion guests I don't want,and now you're leaving. Why not just burn the house down while we're at it."

"Don't jinx anything mister or you're paying for it. It'll be fine Alex,you're gonna be the man of the house for one night,just make sure no one breaks anything,no one eats the Thanksgiving turkey,and no toilet paper…..anything. Okay?" Mom laid down some ground rules while she put on her shoes and gabbed her purse.

"Alright mom,but this is gonna be hard." I nervously laughed as Mom put on her jacket and headed to the door before she told me "I'm telling you,you'll be fine. Just follow my rules and lockdown the off limits areas. Become the man of the house."

She opened the door and got in the car before she waved goodbye to which me and Stan waved goodbye back,soon she and the car were completely out of sight. It was now just me and Stan with the house and possibly an entire school the next night. I stared off into the road and sighed as I said to myself "I'm dead." to which Stan nodded his head nonchalantly.

So to sum things up,thanks to my mom having the absolute worst timing in the world to have a business trip,I would not only be the host for the party,but I would also be the man of the house for 3 days. I couldn't cancel the party and have everyone resent me like the plague,but I couldn't just let it get out of control and have my house come crashing down. However I had to face the inevitable,party day had finally came and my mom had been gone for a day. Living by myself wasn't too hard since all I had to do was make sure I had everything I needed for the party,like Mom told me I locked the freezer so no one or Olaf could take it,I stashed all the toilet paper away so no one would throw it on the roof and house,I placed a bunch of locks on my bedroom door,and the house was entirely set up. Snoopy was nice enough to lend me some of his stuff to use like a spot light,DJ system,and a disco ball. I don't know why a dog would have that but this is Snoopy we're talking about here so I just accepted it and was glad I didn't have to pay for it.

It was around 5:00 in the evening and I was walking through the house to make a last mineute checkup when I suddenly heard a knock at the door. My heart started to pound since I was expecting a whole school to be standing in front of my house early,however my jaw dropped when I instead saw 6 beagles all standing on two legs. I instantly knew who they were when I saw them,it was Snoopy's family although Snoopy himself didn't seem to be with them.

I suppose I should have expected his family to be as sophisticated as he was,but I also had to manage them as well as the entire neighborhood and school so I was kinda hoping they would be normal. I remember them all clearly from their look and I have to say they certainly looked like Snoopy despite a few quirks of their own.

Spike,the tallest one,was thin as my luck with girls,he had black ears and white fur like Snoopy,but it was more rugged in comparison to his brother,and he had a very cute yet confusing brown and black fedora. He certainly didn't look enthusiastic to be here since he looked like he had a permanent frown although he did smile when I introduced myself to them.

Olaf however was anything but thin,he was BIG not in terms of length but in sheer mass and body weight. I was surprised that he didn't cause massive earthquakes when he walked,and he had a hat on too that was more of a grey baseball cap.

Andy was closer to Snoopy and the others in terms of his body shape but his fur was mangled like a shaggy dog and his ears were brown instead of pure black like Snoopy's.

Marbles was the most normal looking dog,he was again closer to Snoopy's body shape,but he had multiple brown spots over his white ears and the back of his body.

Belle looked the most similar to Snoopy in terms of her body build since she had no color changes,although she did have a pink bow on her head,eyelashes that I swear could poke my eye out along with a patch of black fur in her back that formed into the shape of a heart. Molly looked similar to Belle but she had a blue dress instead of a bow and heart shaped patch of fur.

And last but not least,Rover was a little more chubby than Snoopy and the others,but he was no wear near Olaf's size. His fur was a little more dim where it was sort of a gray-ish color,brown ears like Andy,and a gold-ish spiked collar.

I was obviously not expecting them to be arriving this early,but I couldn't just leave them out there. I was debating if whether or not I should leave them out or invite them in when I suddenly saw Snoopy,Charlie Brown,Woodstock,and a younger girl with blonde hair and a blue polka dot dress who I assumed was Sally come by and greet them. Snoopy seemed to be wearing a red sweater with the words "Joe Cool" written in black ink and a pair a sunglasses on. He happily gave all his brothers and sisters a heartfelt hug while Charlie Brown,the girl and Woodstock watched with smiles,however admits this I signaled Charlie Brown to come over to where I was so I could discuss some things with him.

"Hey Charlie Brown why are they hear so early? The party doesn't start for another 20 minutes." I frantically whispered into the boy's ear to which he replied "I don't know,I wasn't the one who wrote the invitations. Snoopy wrote them didn't he?"

"To heck with invitations man,the whole school is coming soon and I need to make sure my house doesn't come crashing down like the Titanic or Hindenburg."

"Well I'll be happy to help you,but I do have to make sure Sally doesn't hold Linus hostage during the party." Charlie Brown chuckled back at my concerns before I got a confused look and asked "Linus? Who's Linus?" to which he merely replied "You'll know when you see the blanket."

"Blanket? Why's he bringing a blanket-" I stopped my babbling when I noticed that Snoopy and his siblings were staring at me with smiles that I assume were satanically hypnotizing me rather than charming me,but I ignored them and decided to just go ahead and invite them in.

"Ok you four and…..dogs,you have all arrived a little early,however the house is all set up so why don't y'all come on in?" I said with a welcoming tone before the dogs started to pile in while they looked around the house. I gave Snoopy a high five before he came in and I decided to properly introduce myself to Sally.

"So I take it you're Sally? Sorry about the rather…..inappropriate introduction yesterday,but I assure you I am not a dork." I politely introduced myself to her with a smile before she introduced herself with a hand shake "I'm Sally Brown,the cutest girl in all the neighborhood,but I'm off limits since my sweet baboo has dibs on me."

"S-sweet sweet baboo? What?" I asked out of sheer confusion at her strange combination of words before Charlie Brown interrupted from behind "Don't question things with her,it's another Linus thing." to which I decided to roll with it.

Taking care of the dogs wasn't too hard although Olaf and Andy ate like a pack of wolves,but it was mostly smooth for the most part. However after about 20 minutes I heard the doorbell ring and I assumed that it was another party goer,I looked through the peephole and sure it enough it was 2 other guests. I opened the door promptly and happily greeted them "Hi there. I'm Alex the new kid and the host of the party." The two kids that were here looked around the same age with one of them being a black haired girl with a blue dress with a small bow tied at the back,and the other kid was a boy with stringy yet short hair,a red striped shirt,and he was carrying a baby blue blanket in his left arm.

I instantly knew that this was Linus and asked jokingly "So I take it you're Linus then cause of the blanket?" to which he replied "In the flesh. Charlie Brown told us all about you,I hope we can learn to get along as neighbors." before we shook hands. I directed my attention to the other girl who seemed to be angrily glaring at me for some reason to which I sharply greeted her "Oh I'm sorry,and you are?"

"Lucy,and this is my blockhead of a brother Linus. I told him not to bring that stupid blanket of his yet he did it anyway." She introduced herself to me in a crabby voice that sounded like she was not in a good mood as Linus added "We have a younger brother named Rerun but he stayed home. He said he didn't want to be around bigger kids at the moment."

"Oh,well tell him I said hi. It's nice to meet you two,we moved in about a week ago and I threw this together to meet some people. Come on in you guys,Charlie Brown,Snoopy and Sally are already here." As they headed into the house and greeted Charlie Brown and Sally promptly,I headed over to Stan who I guess was chatting things up with Snoopy and Woodstock below the stairs and told him "Hey,I gotta head upstairs and get into my host outfit. Cover for me okay?"

Stan stood up and made a cross motion across his heart as I thanked him "Thanks,I see you three are getting along." to which the trio looked at each other for a few moments before they shrugged their arms and gave each other high fives.

"At least they're getting along." I thought to myself as I headed up the stairs to get dressed,once I put on my black suit and top hat to appear fancier,I headed back downstairs to see that a whole truckload of kids had already arrived in less than 5 minutes.

My heart started to pound a little when I saw just how many kids were here,I mean it was a literal ocean of kids that thankfully weren't roughhousing or anything like that,but it was still a lot. I took a deep breath and started to interact with them,I asked them typical stuff like if they liked the party or not and they were all very polite and respectful. This was going better than I thought it was and I soon saw that Linus and Lucy were with Charlie Brown and Snoopy at the snack table,so I headed over and asked them "You guys enjoying yourselves?"

"You sure know how to throw a party Alex,I can't get this song out of my head." Linus replied as he started taping his feet to the beat of My Life by Billy Joel while Lucy agreeed "I have to admit that you may seem like a nice guy,but I still need to see if you'll be a viable asset to my Psychology Booth. Charlie Brown can only give me so many nickels,business is business.

While Lucy continued to go on and on about herself and her supposed "business",I noticed that Snoopy was imitating her over the top movements and gestures from behind as she didn't even notice,and I couldn't help but snicker at the display as he started to giggle as well shortly after. Once Lucy noticed and turned around to see Snoopy cracking up,she gritted her teeth and angrily remarked "I oughta slug you." and as soon as she said that,Snoopy licked her entire face from top to bottom.

I covered my mouth in shock before Lucy screamed at the top of her lungs "AUGHH! I'VE BEEN KISSED BY A DOG! I GOT DOG GERMS GET HOT WATER GET SOME DISINFECTANT GET SOME IODINE!" before she darted into the bathroom. Me and Snoopy shared a good laugh at her overreaction before Linus asked the dog "You just can't help yourself can you?" to which he smiled innocently with an angel halo above his head.

After Lucy's little outburst,I walked away glad that I didn't make a fool of myself until I saw a blonde haired kid with a purple striped shirt sitting on the floor with a red toy piano below the couch. He wasn't playing the piano since the music was too loud for him or any others to likely hear it and instead used it as his own snack table,despite being a little weirded out by this,I still decided to head over and introduce myself.

He must have noticed that I was coming towards him because before I could even introduce myself to him,he nonchalantly introduced himself to me "Scheroder,nice to meet you Alex."

"Oh,hi Scheroder. I see you're a piano guy,I'm more of a guitar person myself but I don't mind a more classic instrument every now and then." I brought up his piano to which he looked up to me and smiled "Well its good to see another musician around here."

"Thanks,I can go upstairs and show you my guitar if you want."

"No it's good,although you could come over to my place sometime and I could give you some lessons." Scheroder kindly offered me piano lessons to which I replied "Sure thing,thanks. I better get going,I need to make sure my house doesn't fall apart." before we shook hands and did our own thing.

I was getting relieved that nothing had gone wrong so far,despite how many kids were here there was no damage to any of our stuff and the house was still being kept clean. As I stood at the base of the stairs away from the dance floor where the others were playing a game of musical chairs,I felt like I had done something good for once. Everyone was clearly having a good time,Snoopy and Woodstock were dancing with his siblings to the music and all the other kids were doing their own thing,however I suddenly felt a sharp slap on the back as a kid with stringy hair and a green shirt with black shorts grabbed me and gave me a noogie that I'm surprised didn't set my hair on fire.

Obviously confused and mortified by this I tried to ask what the heck that was for,but before I could even say anything the kid grabbed my hand very tightly and greeted "Wow you sure know how to throw a party kid,we're sure lucky you moved here. Peppermint Patty,Baseball's number 1 player."

I was certainly flattered to have this kind of admiration from a party I threw and tried to issue some thanks but I swore that her grip was crushing my bones into dust. I held back screaming like a pansy and it thankfully worked 'cause she let go after a few more moments. When she finally let go and let my hand be free again,another girl walked up from behind her with a red shirt,black bonnet hair,a pair of one way glasses,and a copy of Moby Dick in her hand as she told Patty "You know sir I didn't want to come here,it's a little too loud for my liking."

"Come on Marcie,try to have fun tonight,and stop calling me sir." Patty replied with a hint of sternness before I moved past my sore hand and greeted Marcie "Your name is Marcie? I'm Alex the new kid,sorry about the music my dog is the one controlling the music station."

"It's nice to meet you Alex,I usually don't go to parties like this but Patty insisted that I come here. Is there anywhere I can read my book in peace,I got a book report coming up on Moby Dick?" Marcie asked politely as she covered her ears due to the loud music to which I replied "Uh,I think the patio is party free. Try there."

"Thanks,I really need to finish this book." Marcie thanked me before me,her and Patty shook hands and wandered off to do our own thing. This was getting better and better by the minute,I had supposedly already made 5 friends or acquaintances in one night,Lucy,Linus,Peppermint Patty,Schroeder,and Marcie. After realizing that,I decided to join in a game of musical chairs that Charlie Brown,Snoopy,Linus,and Patty were playing. It was a lot of fun despite me not playing musical chairs in a long time. Charlie Brown was super quick to strike out by losing his chair to Linus,Linus was next to follow promptly and Snoopy just barely won against me and Patty. It was now only me and Patty with only one chair remaining,it actually felt very tense between me and her despite it being musical chairs.

Stan pressed play on the record player and the musical chairs song came blasting out of the speakers,and me and Patty did our derpy little dance around the chair,after about a minute of dancing the music suddenly stopped and I instantly darted for the chair. My eyes were shut when this happened and I was not expecting to make contact with the chair,but I opened my eyes to find that I was indeed sitting in the chair. I started to smile widely out of excitement as the other kids that were watching cheered and applauded,while Snoopy darted towards me and pinned a blue ribbon on my shirt.

"Wow the first game of musical chairs I've won,at age 16. God I'm pathetic." I joked out loud to which the other kids laughed and went back to their partying. Once I got out of the chair and headed over to see what Charlie Brown was doing,I noticed that he was standing perfectly still,sweating bullets and staring at something. It was almost like he was in a daze and I felt the need to ask him what was up.

"Are,are you sweating? What's wrong?"

"It's her,Heather the little red haired girl. She moved here last year and I tried to dance with her at the school winter dance,and then at the New Years party,and even at the homecoming dance,but I failed every time. I did technically dance with her at the homecoming dance but I conked out and don't remember any of it. I did manage to talk to her at the end of this summer but ever since she came back from summer camp,I can't find myself to talk to her." Charlie Brown calmly replied despite his shaking as he pointed across the living room to a beautiful girl in a light green dress with luxurious red hair that glowed like fire.

I certainly could see why he was interested in her,she was indeed beautiful to which I suggested "Well why don't you go over and ask her to dance? And try to remember this time." to which he laughed "After the last few times I've tried to dance with her,why not just fly me to the moon?"

"Oh come on man,look I'll help you-wait right here." I suddenly had a light bulb go off in my head as I bolted over to the music station where Stan was wearing a white suit with sunglasses and headphones.

"I see Snoopy is starting to rub off on you,listen Charlie Brown wants to dance with that girl other there,but he can't muster up the guts to do it. I'm gonna call a dance competition and pick him and her to dance with each other,so I need you to find a good song." I explained my plan to Stan and he suddenly held out his hand implying that he wanted some type of payment,I shrugged at the thought of having to pay my own dog but I caved in and gave him my secret stash of cookies from upstairs as he wasn't interested in money.

I grabbed one of the spare microphones laying around and climbed up on a stereo and shouted "Ladies and gentlemen! We are now commencing the dance competition to end all dance competitions! Tonight,one lucky guy and gal will have the honor to dance with each other,but you gotta earn it! Dance to your heart's content and the best of both genders will be the champions!"

Immediately everyone started dancing like crazy,but all I knew was that I would pick Charlie Brown and Heather to dance regardless of their actual quality,I just wanted to help the kid get closer to the girl he liked.

After about 5 minutes of some of the craziest and out there dance moves I've seen from people in my age group,I silenced the room and dimmed the lights as I shouted "Well that was some of the best dancing I've ever seen in my life! However there can only be one winner! On the girls side,step right up...HEATHER!"

Immediately Stan shined one of the spotlights we borrowed from Snoopy on her as she got red in the face due to shock and nervousness as everyone locked their eyes on her.

"And the lucky guy to dance with the dancing queen,CHARLIE BROWN!"

Once Stan shined another spotlight on Charlie Brown,the crowd rather than clapped and applauded,started to burst out into laughter and mocking insults such as "Blockhead!" started to rise from the crowd. From the distance I was at I could see that Charlie Brown was shaking as the crowd made room for the two kids to dance,and a immense amount of steam,smoke and sweat started to pour from his beat red as he and Heather walked up to each other. Despite Heather herself looking pretty nervous,it looked like Charlie Brown wanted to run away and dart out the front door,but I had to stick to my guns and help him. I quickly ran over to Stan and asked if he found a good song,he nodded and started to put on Jennifer Saunders cover of Holding Out For A Hero.

Charlie Brown and Heather proceeded to slowly dance to the beginning of the song for a few moments,but once the piano solo ended and the more upbeat part of the song began,Heather gave Charlie Brown a quick kiss on the cheek like he gave her one at the homecoming dance,and it was like a new kid took over the dance floor.

Suddenly Charlie Brown smiled widely and started to frantically dance with Heather to the song and the crowd roared with cheers at his newfound dance moves,and Stan also turned on a bunch of purple,blue,orange,red,and green spotlights along with a disco ball.

Once the song and their dance was over,the crowd roared with cheers and applause. Charlie Brown and Heather weren't the best dancers in the world,but the sheer amount of passion and fun I saw on their faces made me smile. I was half expecting the crowd to try and interfere with their dance to make Charlie Brown look bad,but they all stood still and did nothing. The applause at the end truly made me feel good and happy for Charlie Brown and the crowd sure seemed to agree with me,Snoopy was giving his owner the hug of his life and Heather's friends were doing the same to her.

The rest of the night was amazing,we all had a very good,entertaining,funny,and magical time. We had a root beer drinking contest which Snoopy and Stan stayed tied at for about 5 rounds until Snoopy came out on top,Olaf dominated a pie eating contest,I brought out my guitar and played some music,and it was just a incredible night,well perhaps too incredible. The next thing I remember of that night was me waking up the next morning on the floor and in a throbbing pain,I assumed everyone left when they felt it was appropriate to do so,but what I was not expecting was to find my house completely thrashed!