The first time Tony had been subdued by that pricky, green-eyed monster seeing Natalie-Natasha, whatever her real name was, share a hearty laugh with none other than Happy Hogan. They were often seen together. She and Hap were staff, at his or Pepper's, beck and call, whether their services were needed in the tower, or at parking lots, outside meeting rooms, in hotel lobbies, just about anywhere or everywhere. They stood, or sat beside him, waiting on his words, ready to act on whatever he required of them.
"You can't hold out on me. C'mon. Tell me more. Keeping secrets is my life."
Tony had overheard Natasha say this to Hap, having chuckled as she spoke to his long-time friend and savvy chauffeur. She'd come across as being more personal, and far less professional with him. Natasha, she was an employee; he was the boss. Happy was a fellow colleague, who was probably more her friend now than co-worker. The billionaire-playboy, genius inventor had envied their easy camaraderie. He, jealous? Nonsense! He wasn't sure what he felt for Romanoff. It wasn't even like. Or, was it?
Pepper was his lady. Even so, Natalie was amazing, beautiful, smart, efficient. And, ah, yes - gutsy. Her gutsiness tantalized him. Therefore, supposing he was somewhat envious of their outbreak of over-familiarity, perhaps the reason stemmed from Happy's sharing secrets with her.
What of it? Tony rankled.
The second time Tony succumbed to that beast within occurred when Natasha had sobbed on Clint Barton's broad shoulder. The occasion? It had been a sorry one, Agent Phil Coulson's funeral. Again, the idea had rippled...what of it? Black Widow, the only woman on Team Avengers, was as close as could be to Hawkeye. Those two had come a long way. Barton had saved Natalia Romanova. They'd been top S.H.I.E.L.D., survivalist partners. Natasha and Clint's bond was unbreakable.
Tony shut his eyes, telling himself to dismiss that thought. Dwelling on what they shared fanned the flames. Jealousy was stupid, and he was not a stupid man. He was the furthest from stupid as a man could be.
The third time Tony felt like a fool, in the grips of the slimy green-eyed creature, had been that time Natasha had abandoned him for Steve Rogers. When he had eventually gotten past his problematic encounter with Captain sometimes-my-friends-don't-tell-me-things America, and Bucky Barnes, Tony had taken to surmising that her initial decision to stand by him she'd made out of pity. He'd been guilt-ridden since Ultron. Pepper had left him too; he'd been unwilling to give up being Iron Man. Unacceptable in her book. And that entire tragedy concerning his parents at the hands of the Winter Soldier certainly hadn't helped any. Natasha's loyalty to Steve had taken her over, having allowed him to escape, even going rogue with him and his team.
Mulling all this over, Tony hung his head. He'd hated the sum total of that sorry situation. He had never taken to hating Natasha. His heart twisted in his chest, and from deep within an ache twanged. How much did she care now? How he wished for that care she had shown him before things had gone all kinds of haywire. Would letting her in, much further this time, win her over? He hoped so. He yearned for things working out for them, and between them.
Tony concluded he wasn't jealous, just strung out, from here to the Jersey shore.
The fourth time Tony talked himself out of feeling jealous, he was in denial. Cap and he had reconciled. The Avengers were back, tighter and stronger than ever. There were more marvelous super-folks on their side now... Clint had announced his retirement to farm; he had a family. Thor had returned to Asgard; he had his people to lead. What had once been Stark Tower had turned-Avengers Compound, home to Mr. Iron Man himself, along with Natasha, Bruce, Steve, and their new allies Sam, Wanda, Vision, plus the youngest of them all, perky Peter Spiderman Parker.
So many memories, where had the time gone? Tony recalled Natasha's reluctance to befriend Peter, at first. Eventually she'd come around. Living and training as one team though, Natasha had grown fond of the kid. Their arachnid blood had played a tremendous part in grounding that friendship. But had something more been brewing? Once, Tony had observed them working out together in the gym. A bit too chummy, to Tony's mind. Had she had a thing for much younger men? The next thing Tony had come to find out, she and Peter had TV series they'd routinely watch together. Again, they'd been as chummy as could be. Gone were the days she had once spent hanging around his workshop, assisting, tinkering, or chatting with him about random stuff as they sipped iced coffees.
Oh, no way. He jealous? He missed having his...his? redhead around.
The final time that unspeakable sensation had come over Tony, he'd incidentally eavesdropped on a cryptic conversation with, who else? He'd gone to her room, wishing to know if she'd wanted waffles and hot chocolate. Yeah, there'd been the intercom, or Friday, but he'd decided to ask her face to face. He liked seeing her face, often. His ears had picked up on the one-sided discussion, and...
"I have no idea, Clint. I really don't. I don't know how I am where I am. Does it sound terrifying because I say I do?We stay here together, that's what's happened."
How he had wished he'd had super hearing like Cap. He'd done the next best thing; he'd tapped into the line, and had heard everything. She poured out her heart to Clint, nothing new about that, but it sounded as if she confessed feelings for someone else...
Clint asked, "So what do you do about it?"
Nat replied, "Maybe you tell me."
Clint continued, "Why me? Tasha, this isn't like tactics in Budapest at all."
Nat said, "You have to help me out with this. Between the two of us, you know better."
Clint shot back, "What? Why?"
Nat insisted, "You're more human."
Clint rebutted, "By whose standards?"
Nat rejoined, "You have Laura. And probably by now Lila shares this kind of stuff with her and you all the time."
Not yet she doesn't...I wish I could keep it that way. She's still my little girl... Clint scoffed, "Hey, listen...just let it be, Nat. Why can't ya?"
Nat refuted, "No," and sighed, "this sucks!"
Clint persuaded, "Natasha, it's okay. You're fine. And I don't think I'm wrong. The guy likes you too."
Nat said, sounding mystified. "How do you know that?"
Clint assured, "I'm a guy. I can read the signs. Trust me."
Nat issued, "Ugh! Why is it so complicated?"
Clint answered, "It is what it is. Yo, gotta go drive Laura to a doctor's appointment. She thinks she's pregnant again. So do I. I'll let you know when I call you back later."
Nat said, "Another baby. Quite the baby makers you two. Say hello to her and the kids for me."
"Will do. Love ya, Nat."
"Love you too, Clint."
Blaster-shocked, Tony had hurried away, heading straight for his workshop. His legs had been steadier battling every villain he could think of off-hand. Wobbly wasn't the word.
No waffles and hot cocoa for you, heartbreaker...
He'd slumped on his couch, staring up at the ceiling at length. His emotions were tied in knots. "Who's she got the hots for? I'd give anything to know," he cried aloud, falling into one of his non-stop rambles. "Is it Steve? Bruce? Sam? Vis is with Wanda. It can't be Peter! No cradle-robbing way! He's just a kid!" Frustrated through and through, Tony buried his face in his hands, elbows on his knees. "I know one thing's for sure. It ain't me! I mean, I want it! But, I'm kidding myself. We hardly talk anymore." That last bit had been a quasi-sob, as he burrowed his head into the couch backrest. "It's Bruce. They're simpatico. Or Sam? He's got awesome punchlines..." Tony shook his aching head. "Steve and she've got history. Clint knows. It's Steve. It's always been him. Not me. It'll never be me."
"No, it's not..."
Tony had gone into semi-shock, as though his mind and body had separated.
Natasha had spoken, surprised at Tony's emotional venting.
"Nat!" He sprang to his feet, wild-eyed and unnerved. "How long have you been there?"
"Long enough."
You, sneaky gorgeous spy I want to kiss all over...may I?
Deep down, he loved the way she breezed in and out as she pleased. She had the run of the place with his blessing, for goodness' sake. He would never have it any other way.
"You!" He gestured erratically with his hands.
Natasha nodded with a smirk. "Long enough to hear...whatever that was." She winked saucily at Tony; her smirking lethal. "What was that exactly?"
Tony's sigh was drawn-out. "Nat, the ravings of a man who's taken one too many hits to the head. I'm sorry, okay?" He avoided her eyes, walking to the other side of the workstation he had positioned himself at, and she stood resting her hands on.
"You're a genius, right?" Those sleek, powerful arms of hers she crossed over her lovely chest.
Tony waved her accolade away. "Overrated."
"No chance figuring out what you heard?"
"Some things are too complicated. Like toujours l'amour heads that list." He had to look away, but couldn't bring himself to do it. She looked at him with enigmatic fascination etched in her face. "Toujours l'audace. Too much boldness for some things. Not enough for others."
"Is there a problem with me liking someone on the team?"
"Not a one, except if it's Peter. Romantic overtures with him isn't cool. Is it him?"
"Absolutely not," Natasha confirmed, seeing Tony visibly relax. "I'm under the impression that you are jealous."
"Who? Me?" Tony shook his head like a madman. "No, no. Way, no."
"I hoped you were," she whispered, peeking at him from veiled eyes.
His forehead furrowed. "You hoped I?" He did a doubletake like Elmer Fudd. "Huh?"
"That'd mean I'm not alone in this." Though she spoke with nonchalance, she blushed for him to plainly see. Natasha slunk to the couch and sat, looking past him.
Not waiting to think too hard about it, he sat down beside her. He left little space between them. "What are we talking about here, Ms. Nat?"
Her voice low, she couldn't suppress her smile. "You...me..."
"I am jealous," he blurted, feeling his heart race, staring into the cores of her eyes. Time to settle up.
She edged closer to him, resting her head on his equally broad shoulder. He pulled her hand into his, bringing her even closer, and thrilled when she nuzzled the crook of his neck. "It's fine. We're all right. Your being jealous wasn't my intention, but as long as we're all right..."
Tony breathed her in and got a touch dizzy. Smiling, he pressed his lips against her velvety forehead, which smelled heavenly, like lilac. "Always." His lips brushed the nape of her neck. Hearing her sigh as he swooned choked him up. "You've always been on my side."
"Always have been, always will be. See, like I said...genius."
He cupped her face in his hands, taking his time with kissing her closed eyelids. "As long as you think so, I'll go with it."