A/N- Hii, thanks again for all the reviews, I'm so excited that we're almost at 50! Seriously though, I'm really loving all the nice comments, so thanks so much - writing to everyone now like usual!

Anyway, heres chapter four... really hope you all like it again.

If you like this chapter, please review... it only takes a few seconds as compared to the hours it took me to write this chapter!

"Up with your turret, aren't we just terrified?
Shale, screen your worry from what you won't ever find,
Don't let it fool you Don't let it fool you... down,

Down's sitting round, folds in the gown.
Sea and the rock below, cocked to the undertow,
Bones blood and teeth erode, with every crashing node.
Wings wouldn't help you; wings wouldn't help you... down,
Down fills the ground, gravity's proud.

You barely are blinking, wagging your face around,
When'd this just become a mortal home?

Won't, won't, won't, won't… won't let you talk me…
Won't let you talk me down, will pull it taut, nothing let out."

Fearless

Chapter Four

I didn't even look over at Edward to see his reaction – knowing it would stop my story before I had even begun explaining it.

And so, as I turned my attention to my lap, I started my story with a shaky voice - "It happened just over a year ago… you see, Jacob and I were really close. And even though I lived in Phoenix, ever since I was young I have always spent all of my summers here with Charlie. That was how I met Jacob – he lived in La Push and his dad, Billy was Charlie's best friend, so they always encouraged us being friends. Not that it was difficult…"

I paused then and took a chance, looking up to see Edward's expression. His face was the epitome of calm, but there was still some curiosity and shock in there. I knew that he was the right person to tell… because he would listen.

I cleared my throat, "A-Anyway, it was last June, and my mom and Charlie had a huge argument – it was over something stupid, but it made my mom, Renee, decide that I wasn't going to Fork's that summer. It was of course really bad for me… I never really had many friends in Phoenix, so the thought of not getting to see my best friend was devastating… I, of course threw the typical teenage tantrum, thinking it was unfair that she was stopping me over some petty argument that didn't even involve me… but she still refused to budge." I frowned slightly at the memory of Renee, and the bad relationship we now had for many reasons beyond this.

I shook my head clearing my thoughts, and almost as if Edward knew what was going on in my mind, he reached out, searching until he found my hand and then threaded our fingers together. I managed to smile slightly at that, feeling slightly stronger with his comforting touch - "I eventually accepted it, and planned to get a summer job instead… but then one day I got a huge surprise. You see, Jacob decided to come and visit me instead…"

- I paused for a moment feeling the tears begin to collect in my eyes before returning to the story -

"And it was great… we spent our time at the beach, enjoying the warm weather that Fork's doesn't exactly offer. Renee had bought me a car the year before for my 16th, so we spent most of our time driving out places…" I sighed at the memory of the summer that was so amazing… and that wasn't.

"One day… the day before he was due to leave, we had gone far out of town, and were driving back. Jacob and I… well, we ended up arguing, he wanted me to move to Forks because…" I trailed off, deep in my sad memories.

I didn't say anything for a long time, which prompted Edward to gently urge me on - "Because…?"

I sighed sadly, as the first tear finally fell, stinging as it slipped down my cheek, "B-Because he believed that our friendship could be more. I didn't agree, because I only, and have only ever thought of him as my best friend… my brother. But yeah, he clearly thought differently which caused an argument… because I was tired of him putting pressure on me, and he was tired of waiting. And anyway… the weather kept getting worse, it was like a tropical storm… very rare for Phoenix." I cringed at the thought of that – why did it have to rain so much on that night?

"… The roads were covered in water, and everything became a blur after that… because I was so focused on the argument I hit a big puddle and the car lost control… I don't remember much, just Jacob screaming at me to hold on… and there was a lot of noise, like crashing… the breaking of glass…" I whispered, squeezing Edward's hand for reassurance – his gentle squeeze in return helped a lot.

"And then there was the horrible, horrible pain. The car ended up flipping off the side of the road, and the impact had caused… well, the car was destroyed to say the last… and there was so much blood everywhere…

It was dark, but I could still make out Jacob next to me… he was in a much worse state then me, I knew that right away. It was horrifying… to see how much pain he was in… but he was still conscious… and he knew Edward, he knew he was going to die!"

But he begged me to run… to get away… I didn't know why at the time, so I refused. I stayed by his side despite the pain and the smell of blood and burning metal. And… he…" I wiped the tears away, only for them to be quickly replaced.

"He told me that he loved me and that he was sorry, and before I had a chance to say anything back, he died. H-He died, right next to me…" I sobbed, as the tears began falling even faster then before.

Edward wrapped his free arm around my shoulder, pulling me against his side as I continued with the rest of the story - "I don't remember much from there, only me trying to get him to wake up, hoping against hope that he was just asleep or something like that. And then everything went hazy and I woke up a week later in hospital, with little memory. Only then, Renee explained everything that happened… and it all became so clear that I went hysterical and the doctors had to sedate me. I just couldn't believe that he was dead… that I would never see him again…" I whispered sadly, remembering the feelings of pure agony and disbelief.

"The times after Jacob's death were extremely difficult, for the first few months I became lifeless… so much so that Renee decided she couldn't cope with me anymore so sent me here – the place where he lived of all places! It just made things worse at first…" I laughed bitterly, feeling the anger at my mother rise once again.

I eventually pushed the angry feelings aside though, and explained a bit more- "Once I started coming to my senses a little bit, I blamed Renee for all of it at first, telling her it was her fault. If she would've let me go to Fork's, Jacob wouldn't have come. And then I actually blamed Jacob... as horrible as that sounds. I mean if he wouldn't have insisted on us being more and then come to visit me… yeah; he would still have his life.

But all that very quickly changed, and I blamed myself… I mean, what if I had paid attention? What if I had stopped the argument? What if I had insisted on going to Fork's instead… he would still be alive. I still blame myself to today… because it is my fault." I murmured.

"No, Bella…" Edward whispered, his voice shocked.

I wouldn't let him feel any type of pity for me though. "Don't say that, I know it is! Charlie doesn't ever talk to me, and if he does its only small talk… its because he doesn't know what to say. He thought the world of Jacob and blames me for his death… I know he does. And I also I know its my fault everytime I see Billy in town and see the pain reflected in his eyes. Did you know the other day that Billy actually gave me a truck? It was a truck Jacob worked on… he wanted me to have it so things would be easier for me. You know, to help with getting to school and work… how unfair is that? They're talking about making things easier for me… I don't deserve it!" I screamed, feeling myself growing hysterical.

My story was now over, and I allowed the emotions to take over me, as I prepared myself for Edward to now tell me he was disgusted. And that he didn't want to be my friend anymore because of what I had done.

… Only… that wasn't what happened at all.

"Bella, please listen to me," Edward begged as he grabbed my face in his hands and rested his forehead against my own, "It was not your fault… these accidents can happen to anybody! It was just bad luck that was all. You cannot carry on with your life blaming yourself – Jacob wouldn't have wanted that, would he? Just because that happened to him, doesn't mean that you can't have a life yourself…" he sighed sadly.

I didn't know what to say to that… his words did make sense to me though, and I knew somewhere deep down that he was right, but couldn't find it in me to actually agree with him.

So he continued talking instead, his nose rubbed against mine and his breath brushed across my face as he whispered sadly - "Life is so precious, why do you want to waste it?"

I closed my eyes slowly, feeling tired and weary now that the tears had stopped falling. And then I finally whispered in a broken, helpless voice -"I'm afraid."

He didn't seem too fazed as his nose nuzzled mine though, "Of what?" he asked me gently.

"Of things like that happening… of so many things," I told him truthfully.

He frowned slightly, "But if you live your life in fear, then how are you going to live at all?" he asked me gently.

I let out a soft breath, "You're so brave to say that," I told him sweetly, knowing that I wasn't really answering his question.

But once again it didn't bother him, "Why do you think that?" he asked, as one of his hands moved slightly further back so it was slightly buried in my hair.

I smiled at his gesture, loving the feel of his gentle touch… it was unlike anything I had ever experienced before. "Because you can't see… it means that you don't know what's coming, you just go for it… you don't let yourself be afraid," I told him gently, praying that he wouldn't take offence.

He only shrugged though, "I don't anymore."

I nodded, knowing that he would feel the movement. We were then silent for a while, as his hands continued to gently stroke my hair and face, and as I thought his words through… and wondered whether it could possibly relate to me.

In other words… maybe somehow, someday… I wouldn't be afraid.

I smiled, as my eyes watered a little – due to the happiness I was now feeling, it was such a contradiction as compared to the emotion I was feeling not five minutes ago. And it was all because of him - "Thank you for listening… and for not hating me," I told him.

His expression became puzzled, but there was also a sweet, confused smile on his face as he asked - "Why on earth would I hate you?"

"Because of the story I just told you…?" I replied – though it came out as more of a question then a statement.

He sighed, and I could almost imagine him rolling his eyes right now. "Honestly Bella for such a smart girl you sure can be dense," he said teasingly, his voice nothing but kind. "I wouldn't hate you for that… I don't think I could ever hate you."

I felt myself melting at his sweet words, "Well, thank you for that… for listening I mean," I thanked him.

"You're welcome," he grinned, before lowering his voice slightly - "… I think you should accept the truck by the way."

"You do?" I asked quietly, before taking his words in, and remembering what he had said earlier… how life should be appreciated. "I'll think about it," I promised him.

"Good," he smiled, as his hand returned to his previous movements through my hair.

I smiled at the beautiful man in front of me – could he be any more perfect? He was wonderful in every way… I lifted my eyes, examining every part of his face when I came across his dark glasses, and remembered what was hidden behind them. "Can I ask you something?" I whispered.

"Of course," he whispered, his voice so tender that I wondered what he was thinking in that moment.

I was going to ask how he had come to be blind, but decided that perhaps that was a conversation for a different time – I would ask soon, but I was enjoying this lighter side of us. I felt like I had been on an emotional rollercoaster with so many highs and lows, and I loved the highs… the times when I would think that everything might just be okay.

Times like now.

So instead I asked a slightly lighter question, which still made me nervous nonetheless - "C-Can I see your eyes?" I whispered.

He sighed, and I thought that he would instantly say no, but he ended up surprising me - "do you promise not be freaked out?" he asked quietly.

"Why would I be freaked out?" I frowned.

One of his hands dropped from my cheek, and rested at his side. "People think its weird… to see my eyes looking at them but know that they're not seeing anything," he explained sadly.

"I promise I won't get freaked out… I just… I just want to see them, to see them as you talk to me." I insisted.

He nodded, "go ahead then, if you promise not to get freaked out… I really don't mind," he told me sincerely, proving that he really didn't mind – which made this easier for me.

I once again promised that I wouldn't, knowing that I was once again telling the complete truth to him. And then I slowly raised my hands up, so not to startle him and gently pulled the glasses away from his face…

Only to see beautiful, emerald green eyes looking back at me, which were the same from my dreams.

"You're so beautiful,
With an edge and charm but so careful,
When I'm in your arms.

Cause you're working,
Building a mystery,
Holding on and holding it in.
Yeah you're working,
Building a mystery,
And choosing so carefully.

You're building a mystery."

I honestly didn't know what to expect when I saw his eyes, all I knew was that it wasn't this. His eyes, his beautiful eyes… seemed like they really were looking right at me, as if they were seeing right into my soul. They glistened in the light, and gave away so much emotion… that I really wouldn't know he was blind if I had just looked at him.

I looked at the rest of his face compared to them, and noticed just how much they completed him. They matched his pale skin, and bronze hair perfectly, and I noticed how they were almost the same as his twin Emmett's… and so much different at the same time.

The green seemed so much more vivid… and the emotion showing through them… there was so much pain, obviously reflected through the times leading up to now. But mixed in with that was also so much happiness and… hope.

The same emotions that were probably reflected in my own eyes right now.

"Bella?" he whispered, his voice nervous, not knowing what my reaction was.

I tried to think of many words, telling him that I wasn't freaked out at all, that he was so normal, so perfect… but instead all I managed to whisper was, "You're beautiful."

His eyebrows raised in disbelief, and he began to bow his head, but I placed my hands on his cheeks stopping him. I then slowly raised his head back up and ran my thumbs gently along his cheekbones, and just under his eyelids.

"I meant what I said… your eyes are beautiful… you are."

"Beautiful was hardly the word I was expecting but thanks anyway," he replied softly, teasingly. He then gently grasped my hands and pulled them around his neck. Once we were closer his arms wrapped around my waist, and pulled me to him so close that there was barely an inch between us.

It was amazing how well we fit together.

I was now completely different from earlier on… in every possible way. Getting over what had happened, and losing Jacob was still going to affect me, and I knew I was far from moving on… but this was a step, a very positive step in fact. More days like this might just help me get there… clearly keeping my emotions bottled up wasn't the answer like I had thought for so long. Instead, letting them all out seemed to help so much more.

I held on to Edward even tighter, once again grateful for him, and then laughed as a quick thought shot through me - "It's funny how we started off always apologising to eachother but now we're always thanking eachother," I whispered against his shoulder.

He laughed slightly, his breath tickling my neck gently - "I guess we just have a lot to be grateful for… now that we have eachother," he whispered as his voice now grew slightly shy.

"You're right," I agreed eagerly, wanting him to let know I felt the same to stop him from feeling nervous. I then lowered my voice, and whispered my thoughts as a blush formed over my cheeks - "You're all I have now."

I thought that my voice was too quiet to possibly here, and almost had that thought confirmed, but then to my surprise and joy Edward moved his face slightly, and leant in so his lips brushed my cheek gently.

Once, twice… three times.

Next chapter = they grow closer, Bella makes a big move towards healing, might find out some of Edward's past. We'll mostly be getting happier from here... there will be a couple of bumps in the road, but nothing too major, just a bit of cuteness and then the HEA.

Anyway, really hope you all liked this chapter! Please review if you did!

Thanks for reading... Emma.x