Chapter 4: Healing
Hey guys, me again! Exams, prom, after prom and school are all over now, leaving me with plenty of time to get writing, although I will be spreading my time over another fic as well as another project that I'm working on. Here's a hint: I'm trying to write a book! I apologise in advance, because there's quite a bit of location-flitting, but anyway yeah, here's another chapter, hopefully this is all to your liking...
PS: Please read the bold at the bottom, it's quite important.
It was a strange feeling for Kanan, to know that his padawan was on the mend but still insisted upon sleeping outside. Although habits die hard, he supposed, and the youngest member of their crew had just gotten used to avoiding everyone, so he couldn't be expected to just return all of a sudden. The two had talked extensively yesterday, and the day had begun to turn into the evening. Before they had parted for dinner, Ezra had begged Kanan not to speak to any of the crew about their talk, and insisted that Kanan pretend he hadn't found the boy. Against his better judgement, he agreed, reminding himself that it would take time for Ezra to heal. It would take time for all of them. So he had returned to the Ghost looking dejected and disheartened, listened to the consoling words of Hera, Zeb and Sabine, and then gone to meditate, attempting to skip dinner before Hera had dragged him along anyway, a sight that Zeb and Sabine had found most amusing. In actual fact, Kanan was trying to sense around the room for any spare lightsaber parts for Ezra to rebuild his, but to no avail. The boy had used them all in his first design, and although it had served him well, there was no way that he could build another.
Kanan didn't sleep much that night, and spent a lot of time meditating, asking the Force for advice. If the Force heard him, then it ignored his plea, and he could feel himself getting frustrated. So, in the early hours of the morning, Kanan roused himself and left the Ghost for the training hall of the compound, but not before looking for is lightsaber. He wasn't surprised that he couldn't find it, as he had a feeling Ezra had taken it the night before they had spoken, and assumed that the boy had merely forgotten to give it back with all that had happened. It was probably better that the padawan had it, as he was the only one that could use it efficiently, but Kanan would need it back to practice himself. With a heavy heart and tired eyes, Kanan set out for the training hall, making s little noise as possible and leaving a note for the crew when they woke up.
-The Training Hangar-
The training hall was in fact just a large, empty hangar that the rebellion had chosen to train in. Set up towards the edge of Chopper Base, the hall was large, around a thousand meters wide and two hundred and fifty meters deep, and held room for an improvised shooting range and plenty of floor space to construct battle scenarios or to spar on. It was in this space that Kanan found Ezra this morning, with his new gym bag containing his work out clothes. The boy wore a black, short sleeved training top that was quite form fitting so he didn't have to worry about baggy shirts flapping around, and some loose, black gym shorts that fell to just above his knees. Ezra had forgone his usual brown boots today in exchange for some lighter trainers that were slightly less cumbersome and allowed the boots to air out. Kanan had noticed that because his padawan had grown up on the streets, he didn't see the need to change clothes, and the fact that he was wearing his workout stuff today was enough to draw a small sigh of relief from the Jedi Knight, as it meant he had cleared his uniform of hidden items and it could now finally be washed. When exactly Ezra had stolen in to reclaim his gym bag however, was a mystery. Kanan supposed it might have been when he first left the ship, but decided that it had to have been last night while everyone else was at dinner, as the teen was still reluctant to come into contact with anyone. The boy in question was currently holding a plank position as part of the training regime that they had set up for him. Between Rex, Ahsoka and Kanan himself, they had agreed upon something. Rex insisted that Ezra complete basic soldier training, which he would oversee, and that the blue-haired Lothalian perform physical training, not just lightsaber combat and Force training. Having fought in the Clone Wars, both Kanan and Ahsoka had agreed. That left the two Jedi to focus on Ezra's actual Jedi training. They had both become mentors to the boy, even though Ahsoka still maintained that Kanan was Ezra's true master, and she only had input after Kanan had spoken, leaving it to him to actually teach. Seeing as Ahsoka was not present, and Rex was still out of it, Ezra had obviously decided to continue his own training, something that Kanan was pleased with. He stood just out of Ezra's peripheral vision and read the body language from what his Force Vision gave him. The boy's arms were barely shaking, and he was certain that Ezra had been this way for a number of minutes. It was a good sign, as it meant that Ezra was still fit to continue Jedi training, and they wouldn't have to spend much time on cardio and muscular training.
"I know you're there Kanan." Ezra panted as the exercise began to take its toll on him.
Kanan smiled. "Good, that means you're alert even when under physical strain. It's definitely an improvement over last time."
The padawan blushed in embarrassment and ducked his head so that all Kanan would see was the mop of blue hair, if he were able to see that is. "Yeah, I thought we weren't mentioning that again?"
Kanan laughed as he remembered the event. He had walked in on Ezra's training with Rex and stood there for an entire hour until the boy had noticed him. "Yeah well, times change kid, I needed a laugh."
"Yeah, you and me both." Was the reply as Ezra got up. They both sobered a minute before Ezra broke the silence. "Oh here, master. I'm sorry I kinda stole it, but I was gonna bring it back! I just sorta, forgot." It took a while for Kanan to realise that Ezra was giving back the lightsaber ad apologising for taking it. He pushed it back into the boy's hands.
"Keep it, you'll need it more than me right now." Ezra's eyes grew wide as he realised that Kanan had just given up his only reminder that he was a Jedi, just so his padawan could have a lightsaber.
"...I... Thanks Kanan, I know this means a lot to you. I promise I'll take good care of it." Ezra stammered. Kanan held up his hand to quieten the boy.
"It's fine. Now, I want these first few sessions to be light ok? We're both recovering in our own way, and I could benefit from the practice with my new, way of seeing." The mentor instructed. Ezra nodded, glad to have his master back. It felt like he was rebuilt. Like a part of him that was lost had been returned. He hadn't realised how much he had missed Kanan these past couple of weeks. How much he had missed everyone.
"So... What first Master Jarrus?" Ezra asked, lightening the tone with the use of Kanan's last name, and the traditional Jedi bow.
The Jedi Knight smiled at the gesture before replying. "I was thinking that I need to move a little faster than a walk if I'm going to be of use to anyone. What say you, young padawan?" He teased. Ezra's eyes regained some of their sparkle, not that Kanan would notice, as he grinned.
"That sounds fantastic!" He spoke in a foppish accent. "Where should we good Jedi start?"
"I was thinking just around the hall for a few minutes, then we'll take this thing cross country." Kanan replied, feeling more like a master, and a father, than he had these past few weeks without Ezra. The two began to slowly walk around the hall, before speeding up into a brisk jog. Kanan had some difficulty here, as he kept banging into things due to the increased speed, meaning less reaction time. However, they found that the past way to combat this was with each other's company. Talking kept both heads clear, and made it funny instead of maddening when Kanan slipped or hit something. Eventually they reached something between a run and a sprint, and Kanan could tell that Ezra was getting bored.
"Hey kid?" Kanan called as they slowed down. "I've got an idea." Ezra stopped, curious as to what his master wanted to try, and relieved that there wouldn't be any more mindless running. In response to Ezra's questioning thoughts that entered the Force and directed themselves towards Kanan, the older Jedi raised his arms, channelling the Force. The endless supply of crates and objects around the room began to float, rearranging themselves in a haphazard array around the circuit they had been running. Ezra turned to Kanan with wide eyes, and although Kanan could not see truly, his Force Vision picked up enough details on his padawan's face to cause him to chuckle.
"Not out of the business yet kid, now why don't you try it out?" He smiled. Ezra hesitated, confused as to what Kanan meant. Then it clicked. An obstacle course. Kanan wanted to run alongside him as he completed it so he wouldn't be bored. Ezra smiled and quickly hugged his master, letting go once the hug had reached the point where it was no longer 'manly'.
"Thanks Kanan." He said, before taking off in a leap that cleared the tall array of crates, landing on the topmost. Looking down at the course, Ezra was impressed. Some of the planks and crates were balanced so perfectly that if you made the mistake of stepping on them wrong, or even at all, they would topple. There were tiny gaps to squeeze through and other areas that looked as though they would require a bit of thought to get through. Ezra felt his stomach tighten in excitement.
"Ready when you are master!" He shouted down. He saw Kanan nod and then set off at a jog. He knew that Kanan's Force Vision would allow him to see his position no matter where, as the Force showed the signature of living matter. He waited a few seconds before taking off through the course, allowing a laugh to escape his lips for what felt like the first time in forever. As they ran they called out to each other, helpful advice, teasing comments, jokes, anything. Ezra imagined that they must look quite a sight to any passers by, but this early in the morning there wasn't likely to be anyone around. Eventually Ezra had ran the course multiple times using a variety of routes, so Kanan decided to test his padawan. Just as Ezra was about to jump across a series of crates spanning a gap of roughly fifty meters, they moved erratically. Ezra looked down at his master to see Kanan stood with his hands extended and grinned.
"No Force jumps!" Called the mentor, sensing what Ezra was about to do. The boy laughed and pretended to pout.
"But why nooooooot?" He whined. He knew he could beat the obstacle regardless, but it was fun to tease each other. When Kanan only raised an eyebrow, Ezra knew it was time to move. He jumped, but not in the direction his master expected. Instead of aiming for one of the now-moving crates, Ezra hit the wall, kicked off it, and landed on a crate further down.
"Improvisation! Good!" Kanan encouraged from below, whilst making more crates move. The ones behind Ezra dropped as Kanan focused on the others. Kanan didn't want him to have too much of an easy time, as instead of simply moving from side to side, the crates floated in all kinds of directions. Suddenly Ezra spotted his chance. A chain that ended in a hook was dangling a way above him. The chain was attached to a pulley system that was designed to move all around the hangar (kind of like the way a claw machine at the arcades works, except it moves a lot smoother). He flung himself towards it and grabbed the hook. Kicking off a nearby crate, Ezra flew forwards as if on a zip line, past a majority of the crates that had no viable pathway through. He looked down to see Kanan smiling up at him, and let out a yell of exhilaration. He could see the end of the floating crates now, and let go of the hook with a whoop, dropping quickly through the air. Two crates came towards him from either side, and Ezra turned, kicking off the closest and flipping sideward over the other. He finished the whole thing by dropping swiftly to the ground in a superhero pose, igniting Kanan's lightsaber for added effect. Kanan clapped sarcastically.
"Very nice." He complimented. "Seriously, good job. I'm proud of you." Ezra turned away slightly in embarrassment, although slightly pleased with the compliment.
"Well, I do try my hardest to please." He drawled in a cocky manner, causing Kanan to chuckle and shake his head. Ezra was quick to change the topic.
"What about you though? You were keeping up pretty well there for a handicapped pensioner." He jibed, before cringing slightly at how harsh he sounded. Kanan turned, but without the scowl that Ezra was expecting. Instead, his master flashed him a grin.
"We'll see who the 'handicapped pensioner' is when you've caught me up." He said before taking off out of the hangar door, following through with his promise of a cross country run. Ezra sighed.
"I should have seen that coming." He complained, before chasing his master out of the door.
Unbeknownst to either Jedi, someone had been watching. They had not seen Kanan rush out the door, simply showing up in time to see Ezra dash outside. The person reached to the belt at their waist and pulled out a comlink. Holding it up to their mouth, they spoke.
"I've located the target, meet me at the training hangar."
In a flash of green and orange, they were gone.
-The Mess Hall-
If you'd asked the occupants of the Mess Hall if they had seen Ezra Bridger, they would have said "No" any day. Any day but today. The blue-haired padawan rushed through the door panting like a worn out Garral, with his master only a few paces behind. The entire hall seemed to move in slow motion as the two sped across, weaving around people and tables alike in a desperate bid to outrun the other. The destination seemed to be the Caf machine in the far corner, and many frantically removed themselves from the vicinity of the drinks dispenser to get out of the way. With a final effort, Ezra slid under the length of one of the benches, causing feet to be lifted and protests to be heard. The padawan got up, apologised, and then turned to gloat over his victory. He stopped as he was tapped on the shoulder and groaned.
"How did you do it this time?" Ezra said between dramatic sighs. He turned to see Kanan smirking victoriously, something which Ezra found amusing given that half of his master's face was still wrapped in white.
"Force jump kid, propels forwards, not just up." He informed the boy. Ezra's shoulders slumped.
"Fine," He said. "I'll stay and eat lunch with you. Stupid bet."
Kanan smiled and gestured for the padawan to sit next to him. Reluctantly Ezra took a seat as people turned back to their meals after such an outburst.
"Ezra? Do you want to wait for the crew or eat before they get here?" Kanan asked gently, already guessing the answer. The boy looked startled, but then his expression changed to one of thoughtfulness. It was evident to Kanan that his padawan was fighting an internal battle, but perhaps that was because he could sense his emotions and a certain selection of simple thoughts due to their bond. After all, any further would have been a breach of Ezra's privacy. Finally, the battle died down, and Ezra lifted his head slightly, his decision made.
"Why not?" The boy replied, shocking Kanan, who had expected Ezra to put it off as long as possible. "The sooner it's over and done with, the sooner everything goes back to normal right?" He continued, and Kanan smiled, wrapping an arm around the blue-haired teen, who leaned ever so slightly into his shoulder. Just then, it dawned upon Kanan that he was supposed to be somewhere. He stood up, dragging Ezra with him.
"Good, because I, and by extent you, are late. And Hera will not be happy. At all." Kanan said, bringing his questioning padawan up to speed. The Lothalian's eyes widened, and his pace increased, matching Kanan's.
"Where are you supposed to meet her?" He asked as they jogged towards the other end of the base, where the ships and quarters were.
"Ghost." Was all that Kanan said as they rounded a corner and continued.
-The Main Hangar-
The two Jedi arrived smoothly, if you could call dashing across the hangar and coming to an abrupt stop at the Ghost smooth. The two shared a relieved smile, the fact that Hera had not been waiting outside seemed a good omen. Once they had regained their breath, Ezra traced his hand on the freighter, lost in thought. His pattern carried him round the other side of the ship, and Kanan sensed him go with a smile. A smile that soon disappeared.
"KANAN JARRUS! Where have you been!" Thundered Hera, storming through the hangar flanked by Zeb and Sabine, both of whom sent apologetic glances Kanan's way. Kanan sighed, he should have known it wouldn't be this easy. Love never was. Pushing his philosophical thoughts aside, Kanan took a breath. But before he could get a word in, Hera started again. "A note? Seriously Kanan? I get a note from a blind man that was barely legible telling me that you've gone for a walk?! Do you know how much worry that caused?" She fumed. "And you knew what today was too!" Kanan would have blinked in surprise.
"Umm, sorry, was it our anniversary?" He guessed hopefully. Sabine and Zeb had to hide their laughter at the pair, and round the other side of the Ghost, Hera's voice shook Ezra out of his reverie. Hera simply sighed.
"No it was not Kanan. But it's almost as important. Today, we were going to get Ezra back. Even if it meant dragging him to the Mess ourselves. Something you would have been a part of if we hadn't had to break off to look for you when you didn't answer your com." She glared at him, causing him to back away. "Now he's probably nowhere near the Training Hangar. We'll have to start again." She sighed, looking desperate and sad. Kanan, on the other hand, wanted to laugh out loud. At least the arrangements he had made for their anniversary were for the right date, although he wasn't sure how he could get that date wrong. It was etched into his mind clearer than his own birthday. And she was so worried about her plan that she hadn't even noticed that he was with Ezra all morning.
"Well, you see, errr, I..." He began, quailing under a fierce glare, that provided yet more laughter from Zeb and Sabine. Kanan sent a quick plea for help to Ezra through their bond in the Force, and after a hesitant response, he started again.
"I've got something to show you." He said, more confident than before.
"Oh really?" The Twi'lek replied, curiosity winning out over anger at the change in Kanan's tone. "This better be worth it, Kanan."
'Come on Ezra, now's the time.' Kanan thought, hoping his padawan would get the message. "Oh it is, trust me." Just as planned, Ezra casually strolled around the other side of the Ghost, looking no more out of place than he would have three weeks ago.
"Hey guys." The padawan tried, projecting more confidence than he felt into his greeting, even though his voice was a little raspy, not being used to the amount of talking he had done today. The crew, minus Kanan, gaped at him in shock. The Jedi could practically see the cogs in Hera's brain working overtime, as Ezra joined Kanan's side and the two smirked. Then, Ezra was roughly pulled into an embrace by an emotional pilot, who practically sobbed into his shoulder in her happiness. Eventually she pulled back, holding him at arms length to inspect him as any mother would inspect her son that had just returned from a long trip. He looked too thin, she decided, but that wasn't going to be the first thing she said to him.
"Welcome back Ezra." She choked out, before turning to Kanan and landing a punch on his arm. "And that, Kanan, is for disappearing to see Ezra without me." She attempted a glare, but Kanan just smiled and wrapped her in a hug, which she gladly went into. Ezra smiled at the display between the two, before turning nervously to Sabine and Zeb. Zeb came forward first.
"Good to see ya, Lothrat." The big Lasat smiled, ruffling Ezra's hair in a brotherly way. Ezra smiled at the sudden drop in tension, and playfully slapped Zeb's hand away from his head.
"You too Zeb." The padawan said, happy to have his family back. Finally, Ezra turned to Sabine. The temperature in the room dropped at the icy glare she gave him. Ezra's heart plummeted. This would be where she said she still hated him, that she didn't care that he was back. He was already cringing away when she spoke.
"Three weeks, Bridger. Three weeks! And all you have to say for yourself is 'hey'?! Atin di'kut! What were you thinking?!" She exploded, but Ezra couldn't help but notice the concern in her eyes, and his hope grew a little. There was still the matter of her ranting at him, but she was just venting.
"Sabine Wren!" Hera broke in. "What were you thinking?! The last thing Ezra needs right now is you yelling at him. Now come on, lunch. Now Sabine." Hera added, as Sabine had started to pull away. The pilot dragged the angry Mandalorian girl away, speaking to her more quietly now, leaving the three boys to themselves.
"Now what d'ya suppose they're talkin' about?" Zeb asked in amazement. Kanan shook his head.
"No idea, why don't we ask the Lady Killer himself? Ezra? Any ideas?" Kanan said, a hint of teasing in his voice. Ezra turned with wide eyes.
"What did I do?" He complained. "Why are girls so complicated?" The other two chuckled.
"I think you're in the wrong place to ask for help kid." Zeb said. "Between the two of you, it's a wonder Hera survives." He laughed, and the Jedi soon joined him. They began to make their way to the Mess, where Hera and Sabine would surely meet them once they had finished their little chat. Ezra had to ask though.
"So, you know she yelled at me?" He started, and the other two stopped to look at him. "Is that a good sign? Like, it means she cares right?" He questioned, drawing a laugh from the older two.
"She cares Ezra, there's no doubt there. Whether the yelling was a good sign or not, that remains to be seen." Kanan replied. And on that cryptic note, he and Zeb walked away, leaving Ezra more confused than before.
"Hey guys, wait up!" He called, chasing after them. Ezra couldn't help but feel that everything was going right. That he was mending, healing.
-Mess Hall-
The tension in the air was thick as Hera and Sabine re-joined the boys at their table in the Mess. Zeb had informed Ezra that Rex had some training to finish up with some new troops, and so couldn't make it to sit with them. In a way, Ezra was glad, as he wasn't sure that the old clone was happy with him, but then the other part of him wanted the captain to be present so he could gauge the mood. Turning back to the mood at hand though, Ezra could feel that something wasn't right. A quick glance at Kanan confirmed that there was something up, as the older Jedi's face was masked in a neutral expression as he watched the two girls make their way over. Hera slid into the seat next to Kanan, getting as close as possible to her source of comfort, and Kanan happily obliged, immediately murmuring in her ear. Sabine however, looked as though she was ready to burst. Ezra shared a worried glance with Zeb as the Mandalorian threw herself into the seat opposite Ezra and next to the Lasat like a stroppy teenager. Then again, Ezra mused, she kind of was. Zeb attempted to relieve the unease created so suddenly with a hopeless effort at conversation.
"We, ah, we got you guys some grub." He began, a little nervously, glancing between their resident pilot and explosives artist. Hera broke off from her talk with Kanan to smile at the former Honour Guard member.
"Thank you Zeb, I see you remembered our favourites." She joked. There was only ever one thing on the menu at lunch, as the rebellion couldn't afford to be too picky with what they ate. Zeb chuckled and turned back to his food.
"Yeah, thanks." Sabine added at a glare from Hera, stabbing at her plate with far more force and vindictiveness than necessary. Hera looked at Kanan as if to say 'you see?', and Ezra suddenly felt uncomfortable. So much for a happy family. He kept his head down and ate quickly, scooping up his plate and cup when he was done.
"Ezra? Where are you going?" Asked Hera. She seemed a little hurt that he was so eager to get away from their first meal back together.
"Umm, I..." He started, glancing around in a frantic attempt to find a excuse.
"It's ok Hera, I said he could go back to training when he was done, he wanted to get a few more sets in before we moved on, and then I remembered that I had to meet you so we had to cut short." Kanan lied smoothly, his face impassive. Hera looked at him suspiciously, but at meeting his eyes she relented.
"Ok," She said. "Don't work yourself too hard, especially after you've just eaten." She warned, as a mother might do her son.
"I won't." Ezra replied hesitantly, walking away as casually as he could. "See ya." As he walked further and further away from the group, his pace increased. By the time he got out of the door, Ezra was in a sprint.
"Ahem." Hera coughed politely, nodding her head towards the door ever so slightly and looking pointedly at Sabine. However, the proud teenager had other ideas.
"No." She said simply. Sabine was prideful, just like any other Mandalorian, and although a small part of her knew that she needed to make an apology to Ezra for what she had said both before and after the trip to Malachor, she was too angry to do so. The anger wasn't entirely directed at Ezra though. Sabine was angry at a lot of things. She was angry that the rebellion had simply let the three Jedi leave, angry that Kanan had made the choice to leave as well as Ezra. Angry at Ezra, of course, for leaving and then coming back and avoiding them. Angry at herself for being so harsh on him, and that she was too powerless to stop him from going. Since Ezra had supposedly come back these thoughts had been flying around the artist's head. And anger such as this was dangerous when bottled up. It made people behave irrationally, leading inevitably to disaster. All of this pent up anger in Sabine's head suddenly changed. No longer was it aimed at all kinds of people. It all directed straight to the one that she had been angry at last. And that person had just left the room.
"On second thoughts," She said. "Maybe I should go and talk to him." But talking wasn't entirely what she had in mind. She rose from the table before anyone could question her sudden change of heart and strode purposefully towards the Training Hangar, where Ezra had supposedly gone.
"Well that went better than I expected." Said Hera in a relieved tone. Kanan, however, made a face.
"I don't know Hera, something was up with her." He said, replaying Sabine's words in his head. His Force Vision had chosen this time to act up again, so he had been unable to make out more than the girl's outline, rendering any facial expressions useless to him. Zeb shook his head.
"You worry too much Kanan, I'm sure they'll be alright. It's Ezra and 'Bine we're talkin' about. If anythin', he'll accept whatever comes out of her mouth and then make nice again." He cackled, referring to Ezra's not-so-mild-and-unnoticeable infatuation with the second youngest member of their crew. Kanan reluctantly smiled as Hera chuckled.
"See Kanan? They'll work things out." She said, placing her hand on his shoulder to placate him.
"Alright," Kanan replied. "If you say so." He held up his hands in a defeated gesture before returning to his meal.
And there we have Chapter 4! Now, I am aware that the trailer for Season 3 surfaced recently and I am thrilled! It looks amazing! Different, but amazing. Unfortunately, it doesn't fit with the story I have planned, so when Season 3 comes out in the fall my story will cease to be canon which is a shame. I'll try to incorporate some of the teasers we were given like the colour of Ezra's new saber and both his and Sabine's new hair styles, but a majority will not be canon. I could go ahead and copy up the episodes and insert my OC's and any other bits I would like, but I think that a lot of you, myself included, would prefer that I didn't do that. So please don't yell at me when this becomes non-canon. Anyway, see ya next time!