Chapter 4
Lofty's eyes widened dramatically as he realised what was about to happen. His heart began to thump against his rib cage with such force it was painful, and he bolted upright.
"Dylan please don't listen to that it's from earlier I was-"
"Hey Dylan, it's me, Lofty- I-I mean Ben…" Lofty's recorded voice began, sounding crackly from the wind in the background. Dylan was still stood in the kitchen, out of Lofty's sight. He hoped to God that Dylan would stay there rather than coming to sit down next to him. He couldn't bear to watch the doctor's reaction to what Lofty was about to say.
"Anyway, I was just calling to tell you that… that it's New Year's Eve, and I've been in a pub for the past 4 hours with Robyn trying to make me dance with her and Max has got off with Zoe again and I was sat at the bar feeling terrible all evening because I want to be with you but I'm an idiot and I can't say no to people even when I don't want to make plans and I know you told me to be more assertive but I don't want to upset anyone. I called to say that I wanted to come and see you before it's too late because no one should be alone on New Year's Eve and I know that you have Dervla so you're not alone strictly speaking… but I really am and - and I need to see you right away before I fall asleep on Big Mac and the night is over and I haven't said Happy New Year to you." There was a long pause on the speaker, and Lofty remembered how he had felt trying to put his emotions into words on the phone. He bit his lip anxiously.
"Dylan I really think you should stop it now because there's some things on there that-"
"You think because you don't know what to say to make people smile that you're a bad person and you can't make people happy…but you're wrong because you make me happy and I don't think you even try. Dylan I need to tell you these things now or I never will because I don't get drunk very often and it's the only time I can say what I want to say without feeling bad and I know that's bad – does that make me a bad person? I – I just need to tell you that you're important and you do matter and I don't ever want you to let anyone convince you otherwise because they're all wrong. I can see the real you even though you don't want me to and I'm sorry for that but it's just an important thing b-because you're an important thing… to me, but not a thing, you're a person, and a nice person at that. In fact, you're a person I think I've fallen in love with," There was yet another long pause, and Lofty could feel his cheeks burning up. Oh god why did I leave that bloody message? He thought.
"Oh and Happy New-" the voice was cut short, abruptly. There was a sharp crash of cutlery falling to the floor; Lofty winced at the noise like it was painful. He sat in silence, waiting anxiously for Dylan's no doubt furious reaction. But the silence continued. Even Dervla refrained from making any noise, instead seeking refuge under the coffee table. There seemed to be an echo coming from the TV, a man in a suit informing people on the weather. A minute went by, but the agonizing muteness between the two men made it feel like an hour.
Finally, something moved. Dylan stepped into Lofty's eye line from the other side of the kitchen. He looked like a spooked animal, eyes filled with alarm and panic. Lofty's chest was ready to burst now, he had messed everything up. He stood up quickly, ready to jump off the boat to escape the turmoil that was about to erupt. Dylan walked cautiously towards Lofty, not making a sound. Picking up his jacket, the nurse finally spoke.
"Dylan before you say anything just let me explain everything just came out at once and I didn't think about what I was saying I didn't even think you were going to hear it I-"
The explanation was cut short in a second as Dylan grabbed Lofty by shoulders and pulled him into a kiss forcefully. Lofty was taken aback by the outburst, stumbling backwards until he was being pressed up against the wall. This isn't happening, surely. Lofty thought, still locking lips with the doctor. Adrenaline was rushing through his body and Dylan pulled him down the corridor. Sparks of reds and yellows burst on the television screen, with only the faint sound of explosions coming from the practically mute sound system. It was midnight.