AN: I'm having so much fun with this story, and I'm glad others are enjoying it, too!
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Eric's equal parts frustrated and annoyed. He shouldn't have to be here in the first place, and now that he is, Nell can't be bothered to spend more than ten minutes with him at a time.
Granted, this latest time might have been partly his fault thanks to their fight. However, it's been long enough that she should have returned to their mat, and she's still over there chatting – or whatever – with Callen. Are they connected by magnets or something?
It's nothing new – get them close enough and they're reluctant to separate.
Eric realizes he's going to have to go over there to get her back (and he's kind of afraid to do so).
He approaches cautiously, ever wary of her retaliation. "Hate to interrupt, guys, but Nell…are you coming back?"
"I don't know," she answers, turning to him. "After all, you're the one who pushed me over here in the first place."
Obviously she'd bring that up. Can't she let bygones be bygones? It happened like fifteen minutes ago! "Uh…that was gravity." He wants to add that he's not technically wrong – every time he loses her, he knows exactly where to find her again, and it's not because he's pushing her away every time.
"I thought while I was here, I'd give Callen some much-needed pointers."
Eric has no idea why she does that, or rather, why both of them do it. Haven't they learned that provoking each other usually leads to –
Callen shifts slightly behind Nell, and it could be a hint he's going for her or it could be nothing of the sort. She doesn't waste time, abruptly spinning, both of her arms coming up to protect herself…from nothing. Callen automatically puts an arm up to block whatever she might be thinking of doing, and she drops her hands onto his arm. She's fast, but he matches her more often than not. Neither of them move any further, and Eric lets out a breath once he realizes they're not going to try and kill each other. This time.
Callen nods in satisfaction and says, "Maybe teach Eric about the element of surprise. If you can."
She lets go of him and steps back. "Is that gibe for me or him?"
Callen acts as if he's thinking about it. "Yes."
Eric considers, for three seconds, going after one of them, how amazing it would feel to take Callen or Nell by surprise. He thinks if he practiced enough, he'd definitely have a chance. He's simply never considered it important. The best he can do is sound as acerbic as possible when he asks, "How much more of my time are you going to waste?"
They turn to him at the same time, and he rethinks his strategy.
"Maybe Nell isn't the best to help you today," Callen suggests. "I'd be more than happy to switch."
Eric finds that preferable. "I can work with Sam."
"Not Sam," Callen corrects him, slightly menacing. "I meant me."
Oh no, that is not preferable. "Uh…"
"You won't switch to help me, but you'll switch to make a point to Eric?" Nell demands of Callen, as if he's capable of giving any answer that would get him out of that bind.
Callen and Eric are both saved by Granger, and the expression on their assistant director's face is considerably displeased. "Can I get you three some drinks? Because clearly it's happy hour."
"I'll take a –"
"Finish that sentence, Agent Callen."
In a rare show of self-control, Callen shuts his mouth, though he still looks too amused as far as Granger is concerned.
Nell quickly links her arm with Eric's to pull him back to their mat. She hopes Granger will stay behind with Callen, and inwardly groans when he follows them.
"How's it going?" Granger asks, and then answers his own question before she or Eric can reply. "Because by my estimate, we've been here for nearly an hour and I think you've spent 5 minutes of that sparring."
"Sorry, sir," Nell says, catching Callen out of the corner of her eye, pretending like he's not listening to them. "Agent Callen keeps distracting us." It's her petty revenge because he can't say anything without revealing he's eavesdropping.
"'Us'?" Eric grumbles, "Try you."
"Don't think that I don't know you're equally culpable, Jones."
She knows her protests will fall on deaf ears. "I'm innocent!"
"Demonstrate something from the new manual," Granger orders, jabbing his pen against his clipboard.
"You know it's the 21st century and we have things like tablets now," Eric ventures. "If you want me to help you upgrade."
Granger only taps his pen harder and Nell hopes for an escape. Alas, Deeks and Kensi are actually getting along and thus provide no opportunistic distractions.
Eric refuses to perform under this kind of pressure, and leans down to grab his calf. "Ow! Um, I have a muscle cramp." He limps backwards and then flees to the bench where Hetty's been watching them for most of the morning.
"Interesting how he got a cramp despite barely doing anything today!" Granger makes sure to raise his voice by the end so Eric can hear him. He looks back at Nell, his closest target. "He was fine earlier, and now he's afraid again? What's the deal?"
"You know how Eric is; I'm trying to warm him up. He's a little nervous about attempting anything new while being graded." And really, where's the sympathy for her? Granger had knowingly let her be paired up with him – the way the morning was going couldn't have been a surprise to anyone.
Granger doesn't seem to care about her plight and his impatience starts to show. "I thought, out of everyone, that you'd be the best to handle him. I guess I was wrong and you're not capable."
She knows he's frustrated, but the unfairness of the accusation stings. What does he expect as a defense? "I'm trying, sir, I'll go talk to him again –"
"Since you're having so much trouble doing your job today, should I find someone else to do it for you?"
She opens her mouth and then shuts it again. She can't let it go. "Sir, I am not responsible for Eric's actions."
It's not what Granger wants to hear, but before he can say anything more, Callen scoffs from behind them. It's no accident that he's drawn Granger's attention – everyone knows the assistant director would rather harass Callen than Nell.
"Do you have something to say, Agent Callen?"
"Actually, yes." He holds up the manual. "I have a lot of things to say about this horrible book."
Granger forgets about Nell and goes over to Callen. At that moment, as if by magic, Eric reappears next to Nell, muscle cramp miraculously gone the second Granger walks away. "Is there any grenade Callen won't fall on for you? First volunteering to assist Granger, and now this?"
She watches the two men start arguing over the merits of the new guidelines. "Don't give him too much credit," she deflects, even as she's thinking up ways to thank him later. "He likes antagonizing Granger way too much."
She and Eric practice some basic blocks for a few minutes. Nell's more focused on listening to the argument going on several feet away, and she's relieved when Hetty gets Granger's attention and pulls him back to the sidelines.
Nell suggests stepping things up, and Eric gets nervous again. He'd watched her take on Callen earlier (and plenty of other times) and knows he can't deal with her on that level. "I'm willing to try," he says, reluctantly, "but I saw you and Callen. I'm not made for that."
Sam unexpectedly backs him up, as he walks by to return to his own mat. "No one's made for it. Callen's just crazy, and he took her along with him." His pronouncement is similar to the things they've been hearing about themselves for months now.
"I can think of another word –" Deeks can't finish because Kensi dives for him.
"You're absolutely right, Deeks," Callen says, ignoring the other man's cries for help when Kensi pins him awkwardly. "I'm unconventional."
"And crazy," Kensi adds.
"Unique," Callen argues.
"Crazy," Sam repeats.
Callen narrows his eyes at them. "Dangerous."
"That one I'll agree with," Eric says. "What about you, Nell? Best word to describe Callen."
She's caught off-guard and suddenly everyone's looking at her, curious about her answer. She sifts through a dozen words that could describe him, his loyalty to his friends, his desire to help others. She has nothing. "I don't think that there is one."
"What does that mean?" Eric asks. "You can't think of anything positive? I don't blame you."
Deeks manages to throw Kensi off of him. "The word you're trying to think of is 'insufferable'," he suggests.
"No, still going with 'crazy'," Kensi laughs, as she gets to her feet. She has to quickly jump away when Callen pretends to lunge for her.
Nell shakes her head. She knows they're messing with her, but if there's even the slightest doubt about what she thinks of Callen… She tries her best to hide her discomfort, wondering why she's answering Eric's question – or worse, why she chooses to answer by facing Callen. "There's no word I can think of that describes all the things you are to everyone who knows you. Nothing that…does you justice."
The tension in their area of the room ratchets up several notches; no one knows what to say. Callen has to help her out of the truly uncomfortable spot Eric's put her in. He throws his arm around her shoulders, hugging her and deliberately messing up her hair affectionately. "No one can beat you for sweetness, Nell Jones, that's for sure."
She ducks away, appearing exasperated, though he can see her unspoken gratitude in the way she looks at him while everyone imperceptibly relaxes.
He's successfully defused the moment, but her words stick with him. She'd forged ahead through her discomfort to answer Eric, and why? He suspects it's because her answer had been one she wanted him to hear.
Granger walks over to break up their circle. He doesn't have to say a word for them to scatter. He should have known the best he could hope for was that they took today's training semi-seriously.
He uses Kensi in his demonstration this time for one of the new techniques and then directs them to the corresponding page in the manual.
"What is this supposed to be a picture of?" Sam asks, studying the page to try and discern what the figures are doing. The illustrations don't seem to match Granger and Kensi's demonstration. "Is this guy kicking him in the stomach? Which one is the suspect? Why aren't there videos of this?"
Callen silently hates his partner as Granger considers that. "We thought in-person demonstrations were best, but you're right, Sam. I'll pass it up the chain and hopefully we can get some better materials in here. I think this manual would have…oh, four hours of demonstrations? Maybe five?"
Everyone groans at the thought of Granger forcing them to watch every minute, probably replaying each scene more than once out of spite.
"Relax," Sam tries to reassure everyone, "with the rate our bureaucracy moves, those videos wouldn't be produced for at least three years."
Granger hears that, too. "Unless you six want to film them for practical purposes?"
"I could be a star," Deeks says, somewhat dreamily.
"I'd be willing to lead that video," Callen declares. "I guarantee my tips to improve upon the new guidelines would be the most helpful."
"Perfect," Eric adds. "You can get my demise on camera for when my family sues NCIS for my wrongful death." Granger shoots him a stern glance and Eric nervously backtracks. "Not that, uh, they ever would. You guys paying for my funeral expenses should be enough."
Callen's not a fan of anything in the new manual, and he's been making it clear all day. "Where's the page that shows me how to push a suspect off the roof?" He notices Granger's glare. "I'm kidding, obviously – no one needs instructions on how to do that, it's as simple as…" He reaches over and pushes Sam backwards. Sam dramatically flails as if he's going over the edge of a rooftop and then falls to the mat.
Deeks gives them a hearty round of applause. "I love it, guys. If I'm directing this video, may I say, could I see a little more horror in your eyes, Sam? Maybe shout some terrorist propaganda on the way down? Now Callen, your performance was nicely understated. I hate to admit I was impressed."
Granger decides he'll try ignoring them and see how long it takes for them to get back on track. That means it's Hetty whistling from the sidelines that breaks them up this time. "I want to see more practicing and less theater rehearsal," she demands.
Deeks and Kensi return to general sparring, though they aren't getting very far with each other and Kensi begins to consider alternate means of gaining the upper hand.
She hears Sam and Callen arguing over the best way to incapacitate a suspect without injuring him (needless to say, their methods don't coincide with the manual's).
"Nice move, Callen!" She cheers, when he turns another page. Deeks looks over to see what happened, and she rushes him, easily taking him down. As she gets up, she calls it as a point for herself.
"That's not fair, you distracted me," Deeks complains, sitting up.
"I'm sure I saw it in the manual. Distraction is key to many of the recommended takedowns."
"Is that true, Callen?" Deeks asks.
Callen flips back and forth through the book. "Uh…I don't…" They can't possibly think he's read it.
"Any time today." Kensi sounds impatient at being denied her victory.
"Sure, it's definitely in here," Callen relents.
"Liar, I read that cover to cover," Deeks says, which is in itself a lie. "That hit was unfair."
Sam knows they have to settle this before Deeks sulks too much and decides to stop participating altogether. "Fine, I'll ask for a ruling. Nell?"
Deeks scrambles to his feet. "You're asking her? That's almost as bad as asking Callen! We all know she's been corrupted."
Nell quells him with a single look. "Yes, that will definitely get me to rule in your favor."
"I'm sorry," Deeks implores. "You are the queen of all that is fair and just in our world."
"Apology accepted. I'll rule Kensi's hit unfair –" Deeks starts clapping enthusiastically, "– but she still won that round, didn't she? You want to win, Deeks? Stop complaining and be unfair back."
"We're supposed to be following the rules today," Deeks points out, though he knows he shouldn't be surprised. "Besides, you would say that. Your favorite method is to go after people when they're not looking."
"And was Kensi playing fair when she hit you just now?" Nell challenges. "Of course not. Man up, Deeks. You can do it."
"I don't think I like it when you give advice," Kensi says to Nell, crossing her arms. Her gaze skips over to Callen and she adds, "At least, not anymore."
"It's not only a valid strategy, it's necessary when fighting," Callen points out, which is a fact everyone in the room knows. The problem is they disagree on when to use those strategies - Callen's always favored incorporating them more into standard training; Granger and some other agents disagree.
Working their way up to surprise attacks had taken Callen and Nell a few months. It was around late August, when their sessions had numbered in the 30's, that Callen had presented the idea of expanding their training beyond the confines of sessions in the gym.
And by 'presented the idea', she meant that one moment she'd been walking down the hall at work, focused on her tablet, and the next moment she'd been pinned against the wall and staring in shock at Callen pressed up against her. The impact only surprised her, not hurting in the slightest (it took her a long time to learn that ability from him).
He eased back, but she was still held in place with one of his arms pressing against her collarbone. "Your situational awareness needs drastic improvement, Nell."
"My awareness was fine until three seconds ago."
"When you were walking along, focused on this." He waved her tablet at her with his free hand; she hadn't even realized he took it. "What if I were an unknown assailant, huh? What would you do then?"
"An assailant. Here. At work." She deliberately looked around at the nearly empty room. A few people nearby had glanced over at the first commotion, and then gone back to ignoring them. "Nice to know I can count on you guys for help," she called, and they pretended not to hear that, too. She figured it was more that they didn't want to deal with Callen than anything else.
"Anyone can be a threat anywhere."
Was he kidding? "Yeah, I think you're effectively proving that."
He wasn't even slightly offended – they both knew he was probably the safest person in the world for her to be with. "Do you want to learn or not?"
"You know, normal people say 'hi' to their co-workers if they walk by them."
As if to prove her point, Agent Will Cameron walked by and politely said hello before adding, "Next time go for his eyes, Nell. That'll discourage this kind of behavior."
"Do you mind?" Callen bristled. "We're having a teachable moment here."
"Eyes, Nell," Cameron repeated, slowly backing away down the hall. "Then maybe he'll let go of you."
Callen abruptly realized that he was still holding her against the wall and backed off a few steps. Why hadn't she said anything?
"Will has a point," Nell said.
"Cameron never has a point, unless it's to be as annoying as possible," Callen loudly directed the last part at the other man, who was still in sight toward the end of the hall.
"Annoying like 'throwing my co-workers against the walls' annoying?" Cameron yelled back, before disappearing around a corner.
"It's a teachable – oh never mind," Callen gave up. "What does he do around here, again?"
"We've worked together a few times," Nell reminded him. "He helped us with that bank robbery last month."
Callen did remember. Cameron had actually been helpful, much to Callen's shock. "We could've solved it without him."
"Besides," she started up the stairs as he trailed after her, "I think he's right. Going for your eyes would discourage you."
"Jeez, Nell," he said, exasperated, as they walked into Ops, "you almost make it sound like you don't want me attacking you in the hallways!"
They were met with six curious stares from the agents in the room.
"Do I want to know?" Eric asked, as everyone looked at them, and when neither of them answered, he took it as a no. He was learning to always take it as a no.
Nell had been skeptical of Callen at first, but she had to admit, after a few weeks of trying to surprise each other, it definitely helped her. She was more aware of her surroundings, had quicker reaction times, and was able to keep her composure in startling situations. The first time she'd managed to successfully surprise him? She swore the elation hadn't left her for days.
After awhile, they agreed to stop going after each other outside of training unless one of them felt like brushing up on their skills for an occasional day here and there. He told her it was because he'd seen her improvement and constant vigilance was no longer necessary; it wasn't going to help her more than it already had. Truthfully, he'd noticed that she was always on guard around him, and it was fine if they were sparring, but he hated the thought of her never being able to relax with him.
A result of their unusual approach to training means they're far more likely than the others to incorporate those strategies into their sparring sessions.
Despite Deeks' unhappiness at her semi-lecture, he can attest to the effectiveness of Callen and Nell's…interesting methods. He's watched them together – everyone has. He can see how well they move and the ways they still surprise each other after seven months of training. He wonders if he should adopt their strategy. Maybe he's too focused on the rules – Kensi never has much trouble breaking them, in any case. "I'll try it your way."
"Exactly," Callen says, feeling vindicated. "Adopt our methods and you'll learn how to never let your guard down, gain a unique advantage, and always be prepared."
Sam has to weigh in on Callen and Nell's 'strategy'. He knows why they do it, but he still has to point out the obvious. "You realize you can work on those things without going for each other when your partner's back is turned?"
"Yeah, but where's the fun in that?" Nell asks. "Besides, Callen's been getting a bit…slow lately."
Callen immediately starts planning his retaliation and warns, "Careful, Nell, your true nature's shining through."
"My kind, loving, caring nature?"
"Yup. That's it." He winks at her.
Everyone's startled when Kensi yells in frustration after Deeks manages to pin her while she's been distracted by the conversation. "That's how it's done," he cheers.
"Oh my God." Eric's face drains of any color it had left – Deeks had done some kind of weird flip and spin maneuver, and Eric doesn't know how Kensi hasn't broken every bone in her body. Nell grabs hold of his arm before he can think about running.
"Back to practicing!" She says, sounding (in Eric's opinion) almost sadistically cheerful.
Callen's been debating a surprise attack on Nell, and briefly considers putting it off because it might propel Eric to a full nervous breakdown. Then he thinks, screw it, Eric needs to learn. He grabs Nell from behind (ironically, as she's in the middle of lecturing Eric on how safe he is while using all the new techniques) and wraps one arm around her mid-section, the other around her throat.
"What was that about safety?" He asks, when she freezes. She hadn't expected it because Granger is standing right there, and she hadn't thought Callen was that reckless. It's also why she holds off on retaliating.
Granger says nothing.
"Could you discipline him or something?" Nell asks, in dismay. She ignores Callen's laughter in her ear.
Between Eric's skittishness and Callen's desire to rattle her as much as possible, how is she ever going to get anything done around here?
"Sorry, Jones," Granger sounds almost smug. "You're always advocating this method of fighting. Why don't you figure it out yourself?"
Then he walks away.
"My hatred keeps growing," she mutters.
"For me or Granger?" Callen asks. His hold hasn't lessened in the slightest.
"Yes," she bites out, echoing his answer from earlier.
"Do you need help?" Eric asks tentatively, as if he'd be anything of the sort.
"Sure, how would you get out of this situation, Eric?" She asks pleasantly, and she can sense Callen's building frustration at her not trying to get away from him.
"I'd shoot him."
"Hey, an answer I actually approve of, how about that?" Callen sounds mildly impressed. He's also getting more confused over Nell's reaction – or rather, lack of one. "Any time today, Nell."
She's been trying to determine the best course of action, and settles on the last he'd expect: she won't fight back. She ignores the instincts telling her the best ways to lash out and get the upper hand on him. If she stops imagining this as an aggressive move on his part…she lets her arms go slack and twists her head to face him, as if she's entirely unconcerned. "I'm trying to teach, Agent Callen. You are getting in the way of that, so I'll wait you out all day."
"You're not going to try to get away?" He thinks it's a trick, even as his hand slides away from her neck to land on her shoulder. "Or you don't know how?"
"We both know that I know how."
She leans back against him, and the way that she trusts him implicitly…it reminds him of another place and time.
It reminds him of their trip to Georgia.
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