Walking in the Dark

Chapter 4:

A/N: Please see the first chapter for background information and warnings. Thanks for reading and please review!

A/N 2: My wife kindly took the time to point out that I switched from first to third person a few chapters back... So sorry, guys. Originally Chapter 1 was a stand-alone and so there is about a 3-5 month time skip between them. (Which explains why Jyou and Yamato are randomly dating, apparently... although, if you read 'Digimon Diary' and 'No Children', things will be less confusing. I still say this can be read stand-alone.)

A/N 3: I'm so sorry disgrunted fan who cared not to leave their name. I appreciate your opinion, but if you had read the material you would see a rational way for the character's actions. You also probably haven't seen first hand what divorces do to people.

Now, on with the story. Thank you all for reading!

Jyou stopped as they neared the apartment complex. Yamato didn't notice for a few steps.

Jyou reached back, searching for the blonde's hand. As he did so, he asked: "...did you like our date?"

"You're asking if I enjoyed our date?" Yamato wondered. Is a date supposed to feel like this? Usually I feel pressured to meet up to some horrible expectations, but today, even if it was mostly errand-running and not a real date, I felt so carefree. "I guess so."

"I'm glad..." Jyou admitted, blushing a little. "Was there something you didn't like?"

"W-Well, all we did really was run around," Yamato admitted, taking his hand back and rubbing the back of his neck nervously. "Still, I enjoyed being with you. That's what matters."

"R-Right," Jyou replied, squeezing the empty air between his fingers. Yamato passed him without a look, worrying the other for a moment before Yamato opened the door and held it. Jyou graciously passed through with a giggle, finding the entire affair old fashioned.

Yamato strolled ahead again, already at the stairs. Jyou studied him as he climbed the steps, noting the blonde's sexy butt and in turn, the worn out look on his face. Jyou frowned, running his hand up the rail. Today was really hard on him. If it was me, I would be expecting something worse. He heard Yamato sigh as he reached the last stair. Oh, there it is. That's not good.

"Yamato, here, let me unlock the door," Jyou said, taking out his keys. He flipped through the sets and then placed the right one in the lock and turned.

Yamato noticed his puzzled expression. "What is it?"

"It's unlocked. I guess I forgot to..." Jyou started, then opened the door. He thought it was a bit odd, too, that the lights were on. Aiko was at practice and he knew he had turned off the lights. Then, Jyou saw them. Aiko was on the couch, glancing Jyou's direction with an open mouth. He closed it, having been mid-speech to the person next to him. Another notable blonde.

Jyou whipped around and started to slam the door, but Yamato braced it.

"Don't bother," Takeru started, rising from his spot on the couch. Aiko adjusted his glasses.

"He's not a stranger, right? He looks like Yamapapa..." Aiko started. (Takeru noted the nickname with a growl.) Jyou let out his breath and the door handle. He walked over to his son to reassure him, then sent him to his room. Meanwhile, Yamato was closing the door behind him.

Then, the older brother turned to his sibling, sternly, "Did something happen?"

Takeru smiled to himself. Really? I haven't even said anything and you're already pulling out punches for Mom? "You know damn well there is. Don't talk like nothing's happened."

"Don't flatter yourself," Yamato smiled. For Jyou, there was something beautifully evil about it that kind of excited him, but he had to stay focused on the situation in front of him. The last time he had seen the brothers interact had been equally as cold. "Are my kids alright or did you and Sora brainwash them?"

"Hanako's unusually moody. I wonder why," Takeru retorted, standing from the couch. He crossed his arms over his wrinkled suit.

Yamato paid the comment no mind and set down his wallet and keys. "Why are you here, Takeru?"

"Mom left you something in her will. I'm legally obligated to give it to you."

Yamato laughed. Again, Jyou felt shivers, but not nearly as exciting as before. "What is it? A thirtieth apology? I've really been looking forward to this one."

Takeru took the book from the coffee table and shook it in the air with his hands. "Here," he said, tossing the album to his brother.

Yamato opened it as dead silence covered them like fog. Even the A/C turned off.

Jyou watched as his boyfriend's eyes skimmed the pages and his eyebrows and lips grew more tense, the pages turning quicker with each second. Yamato finished searching and Jyou was about to speak when he saw Yamato reach into his own pocket. He pulled out a zippo and held it under the book. "H-Hey!" Jyou squealed.

The edges started to send embers ablaze across the carpet and Jyou stamped them out.

"What are you doing?!" Takeru wailed, his voice cracking and he rushed over and grabbed the book. He patted it out with his sleeve. "Do you have any idea how hard she worked on this? For you?!"

Yamato, void of emotion on the outside, struggled with the five kinds of hate boiling inside him. "Does it matter?"

"Of course it does!" Takeru barked. "She was trying to-"

"Remind me of before it happened? Like we were some happy family?" Yamato smirked and covered his face in one hand a second with a long sigh, "Every loving look... hiding what she really was..."

Takeru tossed the book at Yamato, hitting him in the chest and falling to the floor. Jyou glared. Takeru then lunged at his brother, grabbing Yamato's shirt and trying to bring him down to the ground. Yamato fended him off with one arm and used the other to keep his balance against the counter.

Jyou had enough with his house being wrecked in the last fourty-eight hours and grabbed Takeru, calming the boy down. "Takeru, I appreciate this, but you should go."

"Get your hands off me, faggot," Takeru snapped, trying to shake Jyou. Yamato reached through and tried to grab Takeru's neck with his bare hands, but Jyou stayed between them. "That goes for you, too, Oniichan," Takeru spat, backing off. He fluffed out his wrinkled suit and tried to catch his breath, "Disrespecting your mother and father, sex before marriage, pedophilia, divorce, suicide, and now you're a fucking fag, too... how are you not drowning in your own sin?" Takeru shook his head as he left.

Yamato shoved Jyou away from him, burning a hole into Jyou's front door with his eyes. Jyou took a quick breath, glancing back to Aiko's room. He had probably heard everything, but Jyou wasn't sure how to explain it all just yet. Instead, he watched as Yamato's eyes slowly closed and his body relaxed. Tears started rolling down his cheeks, but there was nothing Jyou could do. He looked at the album near his feet. He grabbed it and set it aside on a bookshelf no one ever touched, to wipe as much of the experience from his boyfriend's mind as possible. "Don't think about him."

"I hate him. For what he did to you... I'll kill him if I see him again. I'll kill him Jyou."

Not if you're as bad a shot as the last two times you tried to kill your family. Jyou thought. "What he did... call me names?" Jyou tried to laugh. "Everything's fine. I'm more worried about you."

"N-No, no, no, I didn't move in here to have you worry about me."

"Well, we are dating, right? So, it's my job to worry about you."

"Fuck you, Jyou, it's always been your job to worry about everyone."

"True, but can't I worry just a little more about you, specifically?" Jyou asked, pulling Yamato over to him. The other was a little surprised, but he smiled anyway. Something about Jyou made him happy. Something about Jyou allowed Yamato to be happy, and that was fine.

Ring.

Yamato groaned, tossing his hand out over the edge of the couch.

Ring.

"Jyou!"

Ring. Ring.

"Jyou, answer the phone!" Yamato called from the living room. He tossed his arm over his face, blocking out the sun shining in from the balcony.

Jyou answered the phone all the way back in his bedroom. "Hello? Oh, Azami-san... yeah. Yeah. Yes, Ma'am... Yes. He'll be there today. I understand. He loves you, too. Thanks." All the while as he had talked to Azami, Yamato's 'boss', Jyou had found the phone, knocked over his glasses, picked up said glasses, stumbled out of bed, and meandered down the hall. Now, he was staring down at the lazy blonde on his couch. He threw the phone down at him, making Yamato yelp.

"Ow, what was that for?" Yamato whined. "And.. uh, who are you going around telling I love them?"

"Azami-san," Jyou snorted. "That was first. Second, why are you on my couch when you have a perfectly fine bed in the guest room?"

Yamato grumbled as he sat up. His bangs stabbed him in the eyes and he brushed them back, only for them to fall back into place. "Oh. I told Azami I was going back sometime this week, so I suppose today is better than never... and for the couch, well... I couldn't sleep."

"...I didn't ask when you moved in, seeing as I was sure Sora would have said something eventually... but do you still have the same nightmares you had as a kid?" Jyou said this all quickly.

Yamato glanced around at different spots in the carpet that stood out from the others.

"Yamato?" Jyou pressed. He hated when the blonde stayed silent. He just wanted to hear his voice be honest with him. Not scared. After all these years, if he had changed, Jyou couldn't tell. It was almost like he was reverting through the loss of his mother, but Jyou wasn't that kind of head doctor.

"...Sora knew I had nightmares, but I never told her why. She probably thinks I had guilt over whatever her imagination thought happened," Yamato remarked. He tossed off the blanket. Jyou tried not to stare at the man before him in nothing but his underwear. "Anyway, yeah, I just had this habit of sleeping on the couch after a nightmare. Don't really like beds, you know?"

"I'll... I'll... go get dressed and I'll come make you breakfast, okay?" Jyou said. "Get ready for work, too."

Yamato nodded and watched Jyou disappear down the hall. He let out an angry yell into his core as he leaned over, resting his forehead in the palms of his hands. Now Jyou is going to think I'm more of a mental patient than his mom... God damn it. Yamato stuck his hand into the couch cushions and scrounged up his last pack of cigarettes before heading out to the deck to smoke.

Jyou straightened his collar in the mirror, Even on an off day I look like a total nerd. Ugh. I hope Yamato is okay. Maybe going back to work will help get his mind off things for a few hours. Oh, man, and then there's Aiko. How do I explain how Takeru acted? I still can't even explain what Yamato is going through. The father then decided he had spent enough time in the mirror and headed down the hall. He sighed, already feeling the sting of smoke hit his nose and stopped at Aiko's door. He gave a knock, "Aiko?" Jyou opened the door. Aiko was already dressed for school, save for the shoe he was tying. Jyou sat down next to his son. "Are you... handling things alright, lately?"

"Sure... why?"

"Well, Yamato isn't the best influence around here, but he's going through a lot right now."

Aiko nodded, "Um, Dad... it's fine. I know he's hurting and I know now his family doesn't seem to get along. He's going through a divorce, too."

Jyou nodded. "None of this is your fault, is all."

Aiko chuckled, "I know, Dad. Okay? I just hope you know what you got into."

"Hey," Jyou remarked.

Aiko stood and Jyou followed him as he left down the hall and then, the apartment, before he was late for school. "Oh, Dad... you sure this is the man you've loved your entire life?"

Jyou blinked, "And what do you know about love?!"

Aiko smiled and hurried out the door. Jyou closed it and tried not to think about his son telling him what love was. He sighed again, noticing Yamato on his front deck with nothing but a blanket and his underwear. Jyou went over to the door and opened it, "Hey."

"...so, remember when we talked about us going to your mother's funeral? Well, it's in two days. You need to go see Ken about getting clearance after work today."

Yamato made a noise signaling that he knew. After a few minutes of silence, Jyou figured that Yamato wouldn't speak further and turned to leave, partially opening the screen door again. "Jyou."

"...what?"

"...I can't stand it anymore. For three days all I can think about... isn't how I'm finally free from the memories of my mother, but... everything my mom will miss out on."

"...what?"

"My Mom will never see her grandkids grow old. She will never see me happy. She will never see Takeru and I get along again. She'll never see me fly in space. Jyou... I never even tried..."

Jyou breathed and turned back, "You're saying... you agree with Takeru, somewhat?"

"I'm just a sinner like he says, right?"

"Yeah," Jyou started, pulling his boyfriend into his arms. "If you want to conform to some systemized beliefs about yourself. Why can't you just trust you, like, ever?"

"Trust myself?" Yamato laughed, leaning into Jyou's chest. "Because, look what happened to me. Look at me."

"I am looking at you," Jyou said, "Well, the top of your head anyway. Besides, the only reason you ended up like this was because you didn't listen to you."

"Thanks..."

"No, you don't get it," Jyou said, putting a kiss on Yamato's cheek. Soon, both sides of his face were red, "I should have listened to me, too. I was too afraid to confront you about how I felt. I thought you hated me after what happened..."

"God, no," Yamato said, looking into Jyou's beautiful, large eyes. "I never told you because I wasn't even sure how I felt. I didn't know what love was before I met you. Well, I did, but I thought it was only this evil, dark thing."

Jyou moved to Yamato's lips and kissed him, but upon opening his eyes, he noticed his watch where it rested on his wrist at Yamato's waist, then pulled back. "You'll be late."

"Aw," Yamato started, lingering on the taste of Jyou's tongue and the smell of his hair.

Jyou rushed inside and started tossing clothes in a pile on the couch. "There, now come on."

Yamato felt strange going back to a job he wouldn't have for very much longer, but he had to admit that part of him had missed Azami and his other co-workers. They often were his only escape from home and he smiled, thinking of how he had become his father in so many ways. Then, his heart sank. His children... what were they thinking now?

He opened the door and a bell chimed above him. "Oh, you fixed it," Yamato noted.

Azami was a portly, old Japanese woman. She was wearing overalls and a white tank, so, dressed like one of the guys, it was a bit hard to see her very kind and motherly nature. She rushed over to Yamato, "Son!"

She always called him that, despite having a son of her own. Yamato felt the same for her and in fact, he had called her "Mom" on more than one occasion in the same vein. Most of the time, though, it was, "Boss".

She tossed her biceps around him and squeezed. "I missed you so much, you poor thing."

"We thought you were dead!" barked Miguel from somewhere in the garage, probably buried under a car.

Yamato smiled. "I'm surprised this place hasn't burned down without me. So, what was the big emergency?"

"...well, Jyou-kun told me about your acceptance letter. When were you planning on telling me?!" she cried, beating Yamato with an oily rag. He fended her off with his forearms and laughter.

"I didn't know since a few days ago. I still have a lot of training, anyway," the blonde explained. "I'll be here awhile yet."

"Good. I need you to train Miguel," Azami told him. "He's going to be your heir, of sorts."

"Digi-Jesus save us," Yamato breathed.

"Oh, what is that?!" Azami cried, brushing back Yamato's short hair on the side of his head. She ran over the small dip in his skull and the scar above it. "Such a stupid boy."

"Like I don't feel bad enough," Yamato replied. "I'm sorry no one called you. I blame Sora for that."

"Jyou was kind enough to fill us in... what's with that insane woman?" Azami remarked.

"You mean crazy bitch," noted Edgar, another co-worker. He had blonde hair similar to Yamato's. They were better brothers than him and Takeru. "You dodged a bullet."

"Funny," Yamato snapped, "Edgar wasn't ripping off customers, was he?"

"Hey, I don't rip them off. I just... add a few extras, is all," Edgar replied, crossing his arms.

"Cars don't need a clock for each passenger, Edgar. Seriously, go work at a watch shop."

Edgar stuck out his tongue and then continued back to what he was better at: minor repairs and paperwork. Azami smiled and gave Yamato another hug.

"I'm just glad you're okay. I want you to know you'll get through this just like you got through that Hell hole of a marriage."

"Yes'm," Yamato blushed. She patted him on the back, knocking the wind out of him. Then, for the rest of the day he trained Miguel, which he would continue to do for the next few weeks until the entire mess of the divorce straightened itself out. He would have stayed over, too, if Jyou hadn't

called Azami to check in. The last thing Yamato wanted to do was go back to the police station.

Still, it was what he had to do and so he drove over and stood outside the door for a few minutes. He had at least changed his work shirt to a silky dress shirt in an attempt to look somewhat kept, but the smell of sweat and oil still clung to him as he stepped inside. The place was noisy as ever and gave him the same rotting butterflies in his stomach as the last time he was there, confessing his soul to Ken.

He noted the familiar desk in back. Aside the stack of files, there was a computer, old coffee, and some family photos. Ken and Yolei had three kids, so they were mostly all crammed into the same photographs. Yamato tried to remember if the family he had made had such things, but no, he didn't recall things like that. He clutched his stomach as he waited at the desk, noticing the looks of everyone around him.

"Hey," Natalie greeted, giving Yamato a gentle slap to the back. Ken's partner was a younger woman with short, choppy blue hair and glasses. She wore a black suit. "What are you doing back here? That crazy wife of yours break that restraining order?"

"N-No, nothing like that. I actually need to speak to Ichijouji."

Natalie smiled and Yamato could hear snickering behind him. Natalie called out for Ken who emerged from a nearby room looking as exhausted as Hiroaki did most days. Still, the boy put on a smile for Yamato as he walked up and extended his hand.

Yamato gladly shook it, considering Ken was probably the only defense he had against Sora's say-so, outside Iori. Yamato sat down and Natalie left to fill in for Ken in what had been an interview. "So, what's the matter?" Ken urged, glaring at his other co-workers.

"I have a problem," Yamato said.

"What... kind of problem?" Ken raised an eyebrow.

"Nothing like that," Yamato said quickly, shaking his head, "I mean, I need to get to France for my mother's funeral, but I can't go-"

"You called her your mother."

"Yeah, well, it's a little easier now that she's dead, I guess," Yamato mumbled the sentence in a string.

"You know you can't leave the country, much less this province, while we finish up the investigation..." Ken said sheepishly.

"I don't even really want to go except that I need to. I mean, I can't get closure if I don't," Yamato said. "Please, Ken."

"Unless I escort you personally-" At this Yamato's eyes lit up, "-I don't see how on earth you would be allowed to go."

"We'll bring Iori and Jyou along, too," Yamato said, flashing a smile. "Sora and I will be civilized... if she's going."

"...and you and Takeru?"

"I won't kill him yet, I swear," the blonde pleaded. "Ken?"

"...alright..." the purple-haired boy replied. "I'll ask my captain about it, but if you're sure Iori can go, I don't see why it would be a problem. You will be required to stay with us at all times, though. Sora's lawyer will have already worked out her arrangements, so I'll make sure I contact her as well. When is it?"

"Friday?"

"Two days from now?!" Ken shrieked. "That's a little sudden notice, isn't it?"

"Well, Mom's family made all these decisions without consulting Dad, so... I'm not surprised."

"...I'll give you a call tomorrow evening and we'll fly out then. Have you made arrangements?"

"Jyou was going to cover that."

"Then, I'll contact him as well."

"Ken..." Yamato said, standing. He gave a bow before Ken could rise. "I know... I shouldn't even want to go-"

"She was your mother," Ken replied. "You don't have to explain, okay?"

"Either way, thank you," Yamato said, rising from his bow. "...for everything. For believing in me and for helping me get my kids back- I owe you so much."

"Let's just say we're even, remember?"

Yamato recalled their brief journey into the Digital World before it's close, fending off the last remnants of the darkness, which included a rather embarassing make out session between them. Ken blushed at the thought. "Take care, Ishida."

"Yeah, let's not see you back in here again, okay?" called someone across the room.

Ken was beet red now and ushering Yamato towards the exit, to the blonde's confusion.