Day: 7

Moon: 2

Season: 19

(***) Later that day...

You'll be okay. You'll be okay, he said. Huh. Okay is an ambiguous term. How did he mean okay? Did he mean okay as in things would be fine? Does that mean that he'd let me go? Just pass through as a rouge? Or was I going to 'join' the clan, of my own 'free will'? Did he truly mean it, or would we be punished, like the poor kittypets that passed into BloodClan's territory under Scourge? So many choices... pah. I have no need to be under the dictatorship of BloodClan again... but who knows? Maybe Shatter changed all that. Speaking of Shatter, here he comes now. The large black (? Capitaine Jaf never gave me a good description as far as I could tell) cat was padding quietly towards the alleyway guarded by Brick and Talon. Not quietly enough for my expertly tuned ears. I suppose he is supposed to surprise me.

Shatter poked his head into the box I was using as shelter. "Come." So this was Scourge's successor. Doesn't waste words, it seems. But then, neither did Scourge. I get up and pad after Shatter. Looking at the cats as I passed them, I noticed something similar about all the grown cats. They all had long scars, on their left forepaw, extending up near their necks, all the body, and down to the tail. But only the grown cats, though. The younger cats had no markings. I point this out to Shatter. He glances back at me. "Of course." He speaks as if he was surprised I didn't get it. "They're warriors. Of course they'd have their markings."

"Their Markings?" I spoke it as if markings were capitalized. The black tom sighed faintly, as if losing patience with a particularly slow apprentice. Do they have apprentices here? "Oh, yes. You joined before I took over, didn't you?" Not waiting for a response, Shatter continues. Rude. That'll get him nowhere. "When cats of BloodClan receive their warrior names, they reccive a wound from me, all in the same place, to... welcome them to the clan. Apprentices don't have names, or scars. That signifies they have not yet earned a place in the Clan." After a short pause, I dare to speak. "That seems a bit... harsh." Shatter glares back at me. "Don't you dare defy me again! I do not stand for defiance!"

Shocked, I falter in my step. Shatter stops impatiently, turns around, digs his claws into my forearm, yanking me back up. "You're getting on my nerves. We're nearly there. Hurry up." He turns around, and stalks away. I quickly catch up, and the rest of the journey passes in silence. Finally we arrive at the dumpster that he sleeps in. We enter the dark place, and he lies down, and motions for me to do the same.

"So... what are you doing in our territory?" he asks quietly. "Have your 'stint' with the Clan cats gone on too long?

I take a deep breath before answering. "Actually, the clans are in a state of war. I was simply caught by the cats I happened to be fighting. They questioned me a little bit, I answered, and then, when they started questioning about more important information, I tried to escape. I nearly didn't. During the ensuing chase, I thought I'd try to lose them in the city. I didn't think I'd find you here." I pause. "Actually, I wasn't aware that this was your territory. You must have expanded it." He pauses to inspect me more closely. "Yes, we did... so, are you staying?" Blunt. I like that. "No, probably not."

"Why not?" The question takes my by surprise. "Is there a reason I should?" Shatter glowers at me for a moment, then says, "Well, for one, you're intelligent. We could use more of that around here. Another is that you need protection, yes?" He paused, as if expecting me to respond, but moves on. "Let me tell you something. It doesn't matter how far we run. It just matters how we run. You're not the sum of your past mistakes. You're not the sum of the trouble you cause. It matters how you run the race, what you do. Don't make my mistake. You can leave your past in the past. Remember Red, yes, but remember his good parts. Remember what he did right, the fun times you had. Don't remember the bad parts. Remember him to learn from him. But you must look to the future. And this... this is your future. Choose, and choose rightly. I ask you again... are you staying?"

I hesitate. He sounds like he has common sense. He's right. When I die, it doesn't matter how far I ran. It matters how I ran the race? Did I run the race of life to its fullest? Did I make the lives of others better, if even a little bit? That's the question. The big question. The current question is this; to paraphrase Shakespeare, To join, or not to join? That brings up another series of questions. Will they care for me? Can I keep my sanity and join? Can I trust them? Will they be too suspicious? Should I be suspicious? I groaned inwardly. Ugh. All this thinking in so little time's giving me a headache. I take a deep breath. "I will join."

(***) Three days later

The entire Clan is assembled. Shatter comes up to me. "Silver, do you promise your loyalty to me, and to follow my every order, even if it endangers your life?" I don't hesitate before responding, "I do." Shatter continues. "Good. I will allow you to keep your name of Silver." I held out my left forepaw. Unsheathing his claws, Shatter digs his sharp claws like daggers into my paw and arm, and continues along my body, and to my tail. To my credit, I didn't even flinch. As he passes by me, Shatter whispers in my ear," Welcome to the Clan."

No going back now. Welcome to the Clan, he said. Welcome to the Clan.