As we went inside our hotel room, Erik kept cooing my name because of that kiss. He was completely confused, I would tell him I didn't love him...and then we shared such a passionate kiss on that podium?
"Christine!"
"What, Erik? It was just a kiss."
"But...it was on the lips. On MY lips!"
"Erik, it's nothing to be ashamed of. We're married, you're allowed to kiss me."
"Aren't you disgusted? You don't think my lips are awful?"
"No. Actually, they're better than Raouls."
He sat on the bed, loosening the cravat on his neck, "In what way?"
"Well, they're thick and soft..."I sat with him, pulling off my veil and letting my hair wave, "and very warm."
I kissed him again and enjoyed his hands as they explored my body. I remembered, we had just gotten married, our wedding night... This was the night I always dreamt of, the night I spent a decade waiting for. Would he grant me this night to show him love? Would he show me love in return?
As he slid his hand up my gown and touched one of my breasts, I squirmed to get used the warmness invading my body through the nipple of my breast. It was a warm and wondrous sensation, something I had only THOUGHT of feeling.
"No! I... I can't make love to you."
He fell onto the bed, completely frightened by something.
"What's wrong? Does my body not please you?"
"It's not that. It's just that I can't... When you're ready, Christine."
Ready for what? As far as I knew, I was ready. I was subjected to his whim, and his whim said that I was not ready to make love. I wanted to, I wanted to see him...nude and exposed to me. But I knew that wouldn't happen, especially because of how insanely modest he was. But how bad could his body look, in truth? I mean, the worst it could look like is flabby or scarred... Scarred? Maybe. But he was anything but flabby, I knew that just by touching his arm.
He was muscular, as much of what I knew of him was muscular. He... He is only one thing, truly... He is a man. And every man has their features. Some are crude and gruff, others are weak and subtle, but then there's Erik who is all of the above. At times he can be a gruff person, but then there's that feminine side to him that makes him so irresistible. If only he would make love with me, just once, so that I could see what kind of a lover he was.
"Erik, please! It will be the last thing I ask from you, I swear!"
"I TOLD YOU!... When you are ready."
"And when will I be ready?"
"When you can see past my face and recognize the man underneath."
"Haven't I already done so?"
"Think with your heart, dear. Not your mind."
It must have been a riddle of some sort... Look past his face and recognize the man underneath?.. Who was the man underneath? He was obviously and emotional person, one with caring tendencies and the need for affection. He was already a lover, now a husband, but who was the man?
"The man is here with you... In your arms, in your soul, in your heart."
I looked back at him, surprisingly, figuring out who the man was. The man was no more than my Angel, the voice I used to hope would appear and take me under his wing. The voice I would hope to meet some day in secret and have children with...that's who the man was! The man was my lover, nothing but a man.
"Not tonight. It's been far to stressful. But tomorrow night, I promise you, we'll make love. And passionate love it will be."
He layed down and pulled the covers over himself. I stripped myself of the wedding gown, put on my nightie and slipped into bed, lying in front of him with my head nuzzled in against his chest. I watched as his eyes took in every detail of my frame before he kissed me, just a peck on the cheek, and cuddled me in closer to his chest. The steady beating of his heart soon lulled me to sleep.