After much deliberation and thought I have decided to just skip the genin exam that Naruto and company takes and transfer the scene over to Konoha's leading jutsu specialist jonin, Hatake Kakashi. I do this only because I can't think of how the rest of the Naruto's test should proceed. If anyone out there who has read my story has a good idea for the rest of the story please e-mail it at (And just so you know this has nothing to do with anything sexual. If you readers go to google and type in Little Fighter 2 you will see that one of the fighter's name is Woody. He was the person I would play with during the time that I was playing the game.) So without any further delay I, the master of the written word, the lord of authors, Lord Draco M. Tourn, present to you this brief interlude in the story of Naruto and gang.

How the Other Blasts Are

"Damn that sensei of ours." Yelled a particularly pissed of kid. "He has us assemble at this God forsaken place at three in the damn morning and then has the damn balls to not even show up after 5 damn hours."

The young lad's cry of indignation shatters the otherwise peaceful scenery. The boy was one of the newly appointed genin and apparently had been waiting for his jonin sensei to join him since 3:00 AM. The pre-adolescent boy suddenly whirled around throwing a kunai in the direction of noise that had broken through his rant.

"It is about damn time that you showed up you damn lazy sensei." Seethed the pissed off kid with the blue electric hair.

"Maa, maa, u ziet ik het op tijd ging maken maar toen liep een kuroneko voor me en begon om aan me te spreken. Het echt bizarre ding was dat dit kuroneko een tatoegering op zijn hoofd in de vorm van een blad vertellend me had dat ik gekozen één was wie alle dieren van het bos in hun rechtmatige plaats als hoofd van de wereld moest leiden . Natuurlijk was ik allen uit freaked zodat liep ik aan de meest dichtbijgelegen medische faciliteit met het kuroneko erachter recht. Ik barstte door de deur aan de medische bouw vertellend hen om de vloekkat te doden die me volgde. Nochtans, aangezien het bleek was het gehele ding hallucination die door lezing aan vele boeken in de ruimte van één uur wordt veroorzaakt. Zo werd de arts die daar was gedwongen om me op een tijdelijk horloge enkel te zetten om ervoor te zorgen dat ik niet dat vloekkuroneko opnieuw zie. Gelijk nam vorm 2:00 A.M. aan nu net, zo droevig over laat het zijn."

"Nani??????????!!!!!!!!!!" was the response of all three genin.

"Gomen, I guess I am still not at hyako no pa-sento. That is a language that is used in a far away land called Dutch. Dutch is a West Germanic language spoken by around 26 million people, mainly in the Netherlands and Belgium . What I meant to say was: you see I was going to make it on time but then a kuroneko walked in front of me and started to speak to me. The truly weird thing was that this kuroneko had a tattoo on its head in the shape of a leaf telling me that I was the chosen one who was to lead all the animals of the forest into their rightful place as the head of the world. Naturally I was all freaked out so I ran to the nearest medical facility with the kuroneko right behind. I burst through the door to the medical building telling them to kill the damn cat that was following me. However, as it turned out the whole thing was a hallucination caused by reading to many books in the space of one hour. So the doctor that was there was forced to put me on a temporary watch just to make sure that I don't see that damn kuroneko again. The event took from 2:00 A.M. to just now, so sorry about being late.

"Do you really expect us to believe that lie?"

"As a matter of fact I have proof. See this is the discharge notice from the hospital at approximately 0800 hours. This proves that what I just said was true."

The words of cycloptic jonin caused all three of the genin faceplanted into the cold, hard, and unforgiving ground.

"Anyways, the test begins now. The objective, to gain from me one of the two bells that I will tie around my waist."

"So that is why you said the fail rate was 33. One of us will not get the bell and will fail, ne Kakashi-sensei?"

"Well that is only half correct. There is a distinct possibility that none of you will pass the test."

"NANI?!" yelled both the energetic blue haired and pink haired twits.

"Maa, maa, of course. If none of you gets a bell than none of you will pass, ne?" Kakashi stated with one of his patented eye smiles (I am not kidding, the dude keeps his patent in his pack that keeps his books and when someone does his eye smile he takes 1000 yen from them). "Anyways on with the test, oh and a word of warning: if you do not come at me with the intent to kill me than you will not even be able to lay a hand on me. Ready…hajime."

Once the word hajime had fully registered in the minds of the genin all three of them scattered faster than a normal eye could see, but not fast enough to fool the trained eye of a shinobi.

"Hmm, pretty good I must say, they can hide their auras' well." Kakashi muttered as he surveyed the field. He glanced up down the field admiring that even the one that he pegged as an up close fighter had…never mind. "Ano, you seem to have missed the point Aoi-chan."

"Meh, whatever, just fight me. Right here, mano-a-mano, fair and square."

"Sigh, fine I will teach the art of the shinobi. Shinobi lesson number one: Taijutsu, fighting with ones own hands." Kakashi said as he reached for his fanny pack.

The brave young fool stiffened as he wondered what Kakashi was planning. He was wondering why Kakashi had said Taijutsu and then reached for a weapon. He was just about to pull out a kunai of his own when the item that Kakashi held was shown…it was a book. "Oi, what the hell are you doing with that book?"

"Hmm, oh this, I just want to know what Sailor Moon is going to do now that the evil queen Beril has sealed off access to her Silver Millennium Magic. Don't worry about it; with you it won't make a difference."

"Grrr, I'll teach you to underestimate me," screamed Raiden. The pissed off nin fell into his families taijutsu stance and began to…mew?!

He struck at Kakashi with an open hand; Kakashi was just about to laugh at the fact that the kid had gone insane (kinda hypocritical of him don'cha think, with him reading a girls manga and all) when he saw the glowing claws made of chakra coming out of the boys finger tips. So instead of lauging Kakashi was forced to dodge. He swung around the kid and knelt down and placed his hands in a modified tiger handseal.

"Watch out Aoi, that is a tiger seal he will burn you into a crisp."

Aoi turned around and saw that Kakashi had indeed started to use a some sort of move that involved the first two fingers. "It is to late now," Kakashi cried. "Konoha no Hitaijtusu: Oijutsu: Sennin Goroshi." (I think that this is the translation of: Konoha's Secret Taijutsu Master Art A Thousand Years of Pain, but I could be wrong, help please.)

"That is the ultimate taijutsu move…I don't think so." Both Sakura and Sasuke deadpanned.

Hahahahahahahahahahaha, I am being evil and stopping this chapter right here. Next time watch as both Sakura and Sasuke get their royal asses kicked. Buwhahahahahahaha, until next time, Ja Ne.