Hey guys, I'm so sorry that it's been so long since my last update, I started a new semester at school and things have been hectic around my household. I would like to take the opportunity to tell you all that there will be another update later tonight or tomorrow sometime, but then they will be sporadic. Whenever I have time I will try to update, but I'm working on my psychology degree so things should get more hectic before the calm. Please stay with me I have a whole story planned for these two…don't give up on me! Reviews are love
Disclaimer: The characters and respective shows are not mine; I can only claim the story line and my own OC, and everything else I'm just borrowing
The drive to the beach house hadn't been so bad, in fact the highways were suspiciously quiet for what should have been the busiest night of the year. It had taken Andy about an hour to reach his destination and he had admired the curling waves all along the coast, moving in the darkness in perfect rhythm.
After he had dropped his stuff as her entered the front door and then walked around the small house, turning on a few lights so he would be able to see when he came back inside. The place was cozy and quaint; Sharon had decorated it when they first bought it in hues of delicate blues and green; the furniture was a soft beige color, warm and inviting is what she had wanted. They still shared the cottage, letting each other know when they would be there so there would be no interruptions; it was one of Avery's favorite places. Sharon had a few designated weeks in June for her vacation at the house and then Andy's were in August; the rest of the year was just a guessing game.
Half the time when Andy was there he barely registered the house; too many painful memories and too many photos to contend with. Things that were a constant reminder of his failed marriage and how different things had turned out, things he wished were different…things he wished he could change.
He knew Avery's hand print form kindergarten would still be hanging on the fridge right next to the picture of Sharon and him cuddled up on the sand dune wrapped in a green flannel blanket. She was laughing with a wide toothy smile on her face while Andy's head was buried in her neck, kissing the soft skin there, if he remembered correctly. They had barely been married a year in that one.
There would still be the picture on the end table next to the couch of Sharon and Avery, no more than three months old, sitting in the bay window of the dinning room. The sun was streaming through the curtains behind them and Sharon was lifting Avery up, kissing her forehead gently. The way her smile lit up her face as she kissed the soft baby skin, the love she had for their daughter made his heart melt. He loved that picture, still had one on his night stand in his home and he used to have one on his desk at work…he had put that away when Sharon transferred in.
Andy gazed around as he strode to back of the house toward the wall of windows, something Sharon insisted she needed, she loved the way the sun shone through them in the morning. He unlocked the sliding glass door; the solidness and chill of the object bringing him back a bit. As it slid open he immediately felt the temperature change, there was no longer the house deflecting the damp air or the fresh scent of the ocean. He took a deep breath and let the damp air coat his lungs.
It was a tradition dating way back to when Sharon and he were first married, when they would arrive they would head out to the beach to admire the waves if it was still light. They would sit on the shore, Sharon sitting between his legs and her head resting on his chest, her warmth his anchor. The last few times Andy had come here it was dark when he arrived, so he would sit on the damp sand a stare at the stars that were normally hidden by the lights of the city.
He slowly crossed the deck and stairs, sighing with relief when he felt his feet sink into the sand; he couldn't feel it between his toes but that was ok, it was too cold to indulge that now, he could wait until tomorrow. He walked for a few minutes in the direction of the water line and just before he reached the spot where the waves broke, he stopped.
He shrugged to himself, Seems like a good of place as any.
He groaned as he carefully settled himself on the unforgiving ground, his sore joints protesting with audible pops and cracks. When he was comfortably settled, his legs crossed at the ankles and his upper body leant back on his elbows, he gazed at the darks shadows in the distance. He could hear the crash of the water as it impacted with the sand and then the rush of the tide as it headed back out to sea. It was a comfort to Andy, the air heavy with mist and the constant crash of the waves; it was something that always seemed to calm his nerves.
He had come here often to heal and it always seemed to help him gather and center his thoughts. It wasn't that he wasn't sure about the transfer; because he was…he was afraid of Sharon's reaction. They had gotten to a place where they could be good friends once again and he didn't want her to think that it didn't matter, because it did. He knew the type of strain this would put on their relationship and maybe even his own with Avery and of course Rusty. Although if he was being completely honest with himself and everyone else, he couldn't do it anymore, this dance they seemed to be having.
This was a good opportunity for not only his career but for he and Sharon to finish healing…and they wouldn't be able to do that in the constant presence of one another. Andy wanted her to be able to move on and find someone who would be able to make her happy, someone who deserved her more than he ever did. He wanted to be able to go to work everyday and not have to constantly battle with the feeling of relief and anguish, they seemed to go hand in hand these days. The move would be difficult at first, but eventually everything would even it self out…or at least that's what he kept trying to tell him self.
His elbows were beginning to ache from being held in the same position for so long, so Andy sat up straight, taking some of the strain off the tired joints. He readjusted himself into a sitting position, his legs folded slightly underneath his body, rubbing the nape of his neck with his hand. It was a nervous habit that Sharon hadn't been able to break him of; just like his attempts to keep her from seeking out her pockets for her hands, her efforts to corral his hands never seemed to work.
He could feel the tension shift and radiate down through his back and legs, the pressure becoming too much and reminding him that he wasn't exactly as old as he used to be. Andy let out a soft groan as he slowly rose to his feet, brushing the wet sand from the seat of his jeans, as he turned around, oblivious to the shadow silhouetted on the back porch.
When he finally looked up and saw the lone figure standing on the top step of the stairs, he froze in place. He could place that stance anywhere, the firmly rooted feet and the arms folded over her chest gave away her current mood. As if those wouldn't have, the stony look in her eyes and thin set to her lips would have given her away; she was definitely unhappy. Even in her LAPD sweatshirt and plaid pajama pants tucked into her black UGGS, she had a commanding presence.
Andy looked up towards the stars one last time, releasing a dejected sigh and wishing for some sort of strength or resolve for the upcoming conversation.
Sharon was livid.
No, no, no…livid was an understatement.
She was pissed. She couldn't believe him! She couldn't believe that he would be so selfish as to not answer any of her phone calls; the first and two more on her way down the Pacific Coast Highway no less. She had worked her self up tremendously on her way to the beach house and now that she was almost there she was afraid that her temper would get the best of her. She wasn't sure how civil she could be to Andy at this point in time.
When she had made the decision to come after him she had quickly explained to Rusty and Avery what was going on. Not the nature of the papers in the envelope but the fact that she needed to speak with Andy and he wasn't answering. When she told them she was going to find him, both her children nodded wordlessly, watching her pace the front room while deciding what to do. She promised that she would be back as soon as she could and that she was sorry about missing the festivities with them.
She could tell that the girl and boy were confused, but no matter how badly they wanted to know what was going on, they also knew how private their mother was. She would tell them if it was necessary, if she didn't volunteer the information, chances were it wasn't any of their business.
"Sharon, its ok," Rusty shrugged nonchalantly, "We'll be ok, huh Squirt?"
Avery bumped his shoulder playfully, "Of course, we'll just order pizza and watch some movies."
After a few more reassurances and more apologies on Sharon's end, she found her self pulling out of her apartment building and heading toward the coast.
The only consolation in having to hunt Andy down was that the highway was completely deserted and this gave her time to contemplate what she wanted to say to him, but the more she thought about it the angrier she became. Partly at Andy for the way he informed her and ran, but partly at her self as well; she hadn't been any better all those years ago when she requested the separation.
When she pulled her silver sedan behind the red squad car in the gravel driveway, she could see light flooding through the windows of the house. She quickly unbuckled her seat belt as she thrust open the door; she pulled herself up and out, shutting the door violently behind her. When the damp sea air hit her face and her nose she stopped momentarily; it had been too long since she'd had a chance to make it out here, she loved it almost as much as Avery did.
Sharon slowly approached the front steps and mentally made a note of the summer flowers that needed to be pruned and cut back at some point; how sad and deflated they looked. She gripped the icy wood of the bannister of the front porch as she ascended the steps; the wood was worn completely smooth from so much use.
She hummed to herself as turned the knob to the front door and raised her eyes in surprise when she found it to be unlocked. She shook her head as she wiped her feet on the welcome mat and stepped over the threshold. She was surprised that the temperature inside the house didn't differ much from that of the outside and then she saw the back door was slightly ajar. She strode towards it, barely recognizing her surroundings, she knew exactly where Andy would be. The view from her wall of windows caught her attention; the dark swirling shadows in the distance and the loud roar of the ocean reached her ears as she pushed the door open wider, allowing her to slip through.
She spotted him before she set foot onto the back porch; the lonely figure was leant back on the sand. He was admiring the waves or the stars, she wasn't sure which, but she would know his solid form anywhere.
Sharon crossed the deck silently and came to rest on the top step; she folded her arms across her chest trying to keep the wind from finding its way to her. She cocked her hip against the bannister and waited patiently, he would notice her sooner or later. She watched as he rose off his elbows, no doubt they were beginning to become painful, and sat crossed legged on the sand.
He seemed so…tired maybe even a little defeated to Sharon's eyes. She knew that Andy's guilt was a far worse punishment than anything anyone else could ever do to him; she was sure he might have been feeling a little of it now. She felt an unexpected tightness in her chest and it was a little unsettling and she could also feel herself pale at the sudden realization. It was as if the implications of the transfer had just now registered with her and they were difficult to handle.
What if he did want this?
What if I can't convince him to stay?
If he really did want the transfer…then she would have to let him go, simple as that.
Maybe he had moved on.
No matter how much she would miss him…no matter how much she still loved him, Andy wasn't hers to keep anymore and she had to respect his need for distance. Of course she still loved him and she had regretted ever hurting him so deeply with the separation and then the divorce papers. It was something that had kept Sharon up many of nights; reliving and replaying the events that had lead her to this point in her life. Missing Andy was an ache in her chest that never seemed to go away. When she transferred to Major Crimes it was a relief to see and interact with him again, no matter if it was in a professional forum or how selfish that seemed of her.
The nature of their relationship began to change subtly and in small ways they began to reconnect. He was her biggest support, maybe not from the beginning but close enough. Then they slowly began to come closer after Rusty fell into their laps; if he was going to be around Avery then Andy insisted on getting to know him and then grew to love the teenage by as she had.
Through all their tough cases and entanglements their bond deepened further; her coffee began showing up on her desk in the morning along with the occasional bagel or parfait. Soon the coffee turned into lunch and then dinner dates; maybe she had read the signals all-wrong.
She watched as he slowly got on to his feet, gently wiping the sand from his jeans and she prepared her self. She shifted so her feet were planted slightly apart and schooled her face in a mask of determination.
When he finally realized she was there, his reaction alone almost made her giggle. Sharon could tell from the way he took a deep breath and looked up at the sky, that he knew he was in for a serious argument.
She wouldn't disappoint him of course.