Hey, I apologize in advance for my Sue dialogue. It's so hard to capture the sarcasm and hilarity of what she does on the show, but I tried as hard as I could! Thanks, guys, for reading and reviewing. And settle down, some of you, I can't update every 5 seconds. I do have a life :) Thanks though, it really means a lot to know that people are reading my stuff :)
Sam could tell everyone in the entire school had a common fear of Sue Sylvester. But Sam wasn't scared in the least bit. Everyone in the cafeteria would stop and stare when they passed. Sam just followed her down the hallway to her office.
"Shut the door," Sue said menacingly.
Sam shut the door and sat down with a questioning look on her face.
"Don't give me that 'I'm an innocent child' look. This is a high school. Nobody's innocent."
"I didn't say I was –"
"Did I ask for a response?" Sue said, interlacing her fingers and placing her head on her hands.
Sam raised an eyebrow and slouched in her chair. All right, I'll play this game, Sam thought.
"Don't get sassy with me, child," Sue said in a low voice.
Can she hear my thoughts? Sam thought, but she still wasn't afraid.
"So. You're trying to overthrow the perfect balance of my high school."
"Uh, no?"
"Wrong."
"I'm sorry, but I think you've got the wrong person," Sam explained, and started to get up.
"Sit. I know who you are. You're one of Will Schuster's evil off-key singing minions, coming here pretending to be an 'old friend' of Kurt, trying to destroy the social balance of my school by rejecting football players, and then slowly undermining my authority so that Will Schuster and his rat infested hair can rule my school," she said all in one breath and when she finished she just glared at Sam.
"No. I hate glee club. Just the sound of it makes me want to puke. Like the words 'glee' and 'club'? Really? Glee is a feeling of joy that I have never experienced, and it makes me want to barf just saying the word; club is just a name for a bunch of misfits who want to feel like they're part of some exclusive posse, when in reality they're only 'exclusive' because no one else wants to be in it," Sam replied flatly.
Sue just stared at Sam blankly for a few moments. Then, her face lit up in a way that nobody at William McKinley High had ever seen before. Then she spoke.
"If I didn't hate children, and if I weren't barren, I would have a daughter exactly like you. You've got potential, kid. Now, I'm about to make you an offer you can't refuse," Sue said quietly.
"Go on," Sam said, interested.
"You are going to be my new captain of the Cheerios."
Sam's mouth dropped open and stayed open. "Okay, I do NOT cheer."
"Oh, don't play that with me. I did a background check on you. You took ballet and hip hop…so you're flexible and you can bust a move."
Bust a move? Sam didn't dare to say out loud. "Thanks for the offer…Sue…but I'm not going to join a dumb show choir or a preppy cheer squad. See ya!"
Sam walked out the door as Sue yelled, "IT'S COACH SYLVESTER, YOU WORTHLESS CHILD!"