Lisbon entered her office the next morning, to find a doggie bag from marie's and a cup of coffee sitting on her desk. She glanced over at her couch to find the culprit, seemingly sleeping comfortable.

"Morning Jane," she called out, setting her briefcase down and peeking into the bag, smiling when she saw two of her favorite pastries sitting at the bottom.

"Good morning," Jane slowly sat up, a lazy smile on his face as he watched Lisbon take a bite of the bear claw. "Feeling better?"

Lisbon nodded and sat down at her desk. "Cho, caught me up to speed on the case. You think it's the wife?"

"Do I think the wife killed her husband because he was having an affair with his hot assistant? Yes, i got that vibe from her,"

Lisbon shook her head. "How about facts, rather than vibe,"

"Meh," Jane waved her off with his hand, his face suddenly turning serious as Lisbon's eyes widened. "What's wrong?"

Lisbon glanced down at the pastry in her hand as her stomach started churning. Apparently her favorite pastry was not the chosen pastry of the baby inside of her. Lunging for her waste basket next to her desk, she reached it just in time to spit back up the bite she had taken.

"Whoah, hey..ew" Jane made a face, but jumped up to help her.

"Must be something bad," placed her hand over her stomach.

"Here," Jane handed her a tissue to wipe her chin and mouth, then quickly exited out into the bullpen, returning a few moments later with a bottle of water. "You sure you're all better?"

Lisbon rolled her eyes and took a swig of water. "Yeah, I'll be fine,"

Jane was about to make another comment, but Cho stuck his head in the door. "Boss, we caught a lead on the wife's friend. We need to get to her,"

Lisbon nodded.

"You alright?" Cho asked.

"I'm fine," Lisbon said in low voice and a look in Cho's direction that sent him back into the bullpen.

"Don't scare him, he was just concerned," Jane chided, his hand sliding from her shoulder across her back.

Lisbon sighed and leaned back into his touch, letting out a small groan.

"You sure you're-"

"I'm fine, Jane," Lisbon snapped, getting to her feet.

xxxx

One week. She managed to go one week, and she thought she was doing rather well. Hiding the morning sickness, keeping her verbalizing of her cravings to a minimum, she satisfied them quietly and in her own time. It wasn't until her, Jane, and Van Pelt were visiting a flight risk witness. The man seemed edgy the whole time they were talking with him, Jane constantly pushing the man's buttons wasn't making it better.

It was when bullets came flying out of the the closet door, Jane noticed Lisbon duck first, one hand going across her stomach, in a protective, motherly instinct way and then after a second or two, she reached for her gun, but Van Pelt already had fired a few rounds into the closet, silencing the intruder.

"You okay, Jane?" Lisbon asked, coming up from her knees.

Jane stared at her, his wide mouth open. "You...you didn't reach for gun,"

They held eachothers gaze for a moment, before Lisbon turned and quickly walked away from him.

An hour later, they were back at headquarters. Lisbon, noticing Jane's eyes never leaving her, hastened to get to her office and shut the door, but to no avail. He was right on her tail from the moment they stepped out of the elevator to the shutting of her door, he managed to get his whole arm through before it made it closed.

"What do you want Jane?" she didn't even turn to look at him, she knew he knew.

Jane shut the door behind him and turned to her, hands on his hips, eyes wide. "Is there something you need to tell me?"

"Like what?"

Jane's eyes flicked to her stomach then back at her.

Lisbon's hand retreated to the instinctive position on her stomach, but quickly dropped it to her side. "I don't-"

"You're pregnant, how could I have missed that? No coffee, throwing up the bear claw. Abnormally quiet, trying to reign in your anger, less stress,"

Lisbon glared at him.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Jane," Lisbon spoke in a low voice. "Not here...please,"

He dropped his hands to his side and paced the room. Turning back to her he simply asked. "Is it...mine?"

Lisbon scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Because I sleep with a different man each night?"

"Well we haven't really been involved in each other's personal lives very much, have we?"

Lisbon's eyes narrowed as she took a step toward him. "You left me that night," she hissed at him. "Don't you dare put that on me, you've said NOTHING about that night. How in the hell do you think that makes me feel?"

Jane bit the inside of his cheek and looked down and around the office, anywhere but in her eyes. "How long have you known?"

"A week, I go to the dcotors next week to officially confirm it, but i think peeing on 3 sticks and coming back with a positive is pretty damn clear,"

"You still need to go to the -"

"I am," Lisbon cut him off.

"Why didn't you tell me when you found out," Jane whispered, taking a step towards her. He wanted to hug her, he wanted to shake her, he wanted to run, he wanted to smile, he wanted to cry. Another round of inner turmoil and utter confusion began to settle in him.

"Well, like you said, we haven't really been involved in each other's lives," Lisbon said quietly, her fingers picking at the edge of her desk.

"Yeah," Jane said in a hoarse whisper and with one last glance he fled her office.

Lisbon let out a sigh and leaned against her desk. She knew this had the potential of possible unhinging Jane and she never wanted that.

"Boss, you okay?" Grace asked quietly from the doorway. "Jane seemed a little upset just now,"

"Yeah," Lisbon said "You know Jane, he doesn't like being shot at it,"

"Yeah, i guess...well...are you okay?"

Lisbon could tell Grace was uncomfortable and it was starting to make her uncomfortable. She felt she like was on the verge of tears, but knew that would probably be a dead give away. "I'm fine Van Pelt," said a little more harshly than necessary, throwing in a glare for good measure.

Van Pelt nodded and slipped away, closing the door behind her.

Rubbing her hands over her face, Lisbon let out a frustrated, mangled sigh. All week she had been doing well, and instead of reaching for her gun, ducking first, THAT was the give away for Jane. She thought about seeking him out, going off on him and telling him to man up, but then another part of her knew she couldn't imagine what he was going through. He had had a wife, he had a child and they were taken from him. And what they had was a one nightstand, which was resulting in another child for him.

For a moment, ice cold fear gripped her and she thought about what would happen if this spooked Jane off for good. As if this child could replace Charlotte. And then another fear crossed her mind, Red John. What if Red John found out? Lisbon's stomach started turning again and all Lisbon wanted to do was to run, far, far away.

Jane drove aimlessly. He didn't know where he was going or where he was going to end up, he just knew he need to be far away from Lisbon. His thoughts were frantic and his heart was heavy, yet elated at the same time. He loved Lisbon. He knew this. He also knew if anything were to ever come of it, it would mean a target on Lisbon's head. Now there was one on hers AND their child's. Jane slammed his palm down the steering wheel. "Damn it," he yelled to no one, as tears pricked his vision.

Then he had another train of that that. A child. Having another child again, what if it was possible? What if this time he could keep them safe? To be with Lisbon and having a kid. He shook his head, it just wasn't possible. He wasn't meant to be happy, but to be tortured and to have what he wanted either dangled in front of him or to just be taken away.

One night, one stupid drunken night. He didn't want Lisbon with another man. He didn't want another man kissing her or another man's hands on her, HE wanted her. He wanted to be the one doing all of those things, so he did. It was an amazing, intoxicating night, and he kicked himself for leaving afterwards, also for never having the courage to actually talk with her about what had happened.

His heart was twist and torn, as the unknown lay before him. He just wanted to run far, far away.

a/n: Enjoy. Reviews make my day :)