Fairy Hills OC's.
Awkward discussions. Arguments. Tormenting. Fighting. Teasing. Loving. Friendship. Pairing. It all happens in Fairy Hills OC's with your and my OC's. One-shots/Drabbles welcome in requests. Needed, even, for more and quicker updates. Rating at least a T for epicness, some violence, swearing and Gray's pervertness.
Beware the twins. Mary found a question sheet. Alice has the answers. Levy's brain goes overdrive. Juvia/Lluvia.. . the same, faints in shock. Gray gets (sort of) bribed. Gajeel goes death. Alice gets drunk. Written by Marina Rose. MaryGajeel AliceGray
Rated T+/M- for swearing, drinking and sexual themes.
Questions and half confessions.
Mary burst into the guild waving a stack of papers in her hands, "Alice~! Look at what I found!"
Alice turned her head away from the Ice mage she was talking to, to focus on her sister, "What is it Mary? Did you find a treasure map?"
"Not this time! No, I found all these funny questions! I want to ask you them!" She replied full of energy.
"This time? She's found a treasure map before?" Gray asked Alice.
"Yeah, that's a long story… Anyways, Mary, what are the questions? I'll answer them as truly as I can…" Alice trailed off knowing that she shouldn't have agreed to this.
Levy had overheard and wondered what kind of questions they would be, "I want to answer them too!"
"Sure, the more the merrier!" Mary grinned, "Okay, here's the first question: Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?"
Alice stared at her for a moment and the opened her mouth, "Well, sucking is goooood for you!"
The two girls laughed and Gray stared at them with wide eyes.
"Second one: Why is the third hand on a watch called the second hand?"
"Because the guy who made it was from old times and they couldn't count back then! Please~ give me some harder questions!" Alice crossed her arms and faced her counterpart. These questions were funny!
"If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we know?"
Levy thought about this hard, and then gave up because it was impossible.
"Ahhah! The internet!" Alice stated smugly.
Levy just stared in shock, Books could never be wrong!
"Ah, but they can be Levy…" Alice told with an evil smile.
"Wh-What?" Levy stuttered.
"Oh, nothing. Nothing at all."
Mary snapped her fingers, "Alright, the next one is: If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he get all the words from?"
Levy straightened up, "From other books!"
Mary made a buzzing sound, "Wrong~!" she sang, "Alice, do you know the answer?"
"Why, yes I do, Mary. From the walls of the caves of the cavemen!"
"Correct!" Mary squealed.
Gajeel stalked over behind her, "What's with all the squealing? It's barely pass ten in the morning! No one should have to deal with such a high pitched sound."
Mary (=_=) narrowed her eyes, "Gajeel come here." She crooked her finger into his collar and yanked him down to her level; she pulled his ear and screamed as loud as she could into his ear, "I CAN SCREAM LOUDER THAN I SQUEAL!"
Gajeel grabbed his ear with both hands and yelled, "I've gone deaf!"
''God Mary. Careful with your man. You still need him to allow you to demonstrate the first question.'' Alice 'pshed' at her with a sly smile.
A sweat drop ran down Gray's face. This was getting a bit out of hand.
Mary blushed, "Well, I bet Gray did for you!"
Somewhere in the back ground Lluvia fainted from shock.
"Well~" Alice trailed off and Gray choked on his drink.
Mary(=_=) narrowed her eyes, "You have no shame…"
"Nope!"
Levy cleared her throat, "Next question?"
Mary glanced down at the papers in her hand, "Why do we say things are 'out of whack'? What is a whack?"
Levy lifted one finger in the air, "A whack is a crazy person!"
Alice deadpanned, "No, a whack is a type of duck with his brains scrambled."
"It is?" Gray asked.
Alice nodded, "It is."
"Next! Why do 'slow down' and 'slow up' mean the same thing?"
Alice shrugged, "Because down and up are boyfriend girlfriend."
"Like you and Gray…"Mary mumbled under her breath.
"What?" Levy asked.
"Nothing! Ok, I think you can answer the next one Levy!" she said putting a big smile on her face.
Levy's face lit up, "Really?"
"Sure, ok, here it is: Why do 'fat chance' and 'slim chance' mean the same thing?"
Levy didn't have a chance to answer,
"Because fatties and thin people are both human even if they don't look the same." Alice answered lazily.
"How does that make any sense?" Gray whispered to Gajeel.
Alice and Mary gave them both death glares, "It just does."
They shrunk in fear.
"Moving on, why do 'tug' boats push their barges?"
"I know this one! I know it!" Levy exclaimed.
"No, you don't." Alice stated with a wave of her hand.
"I don't?"
"You don't."
"Crap, I don't…"
"The barges tug the boats along: Tug the Boats. Ergo, the Tug Boats" Alice said, looking at Levy smugly.
Levy stamped her foot, she had read almost every book she could get her hands on and yet this girl that probably (and really) doesn't read was beating her! She was full of useless information!
"Ok, I think this an American question…but here it is: Why do we sing 'Take me out to the ball game' when we are already there?" Mary said puzzled.
"I have never heard of the song. Probably because Americans are retards…" Alice said with a raised eyebrow.
"Yeah, Americans are pretty weird…" Mary agreed.
"Aren't you American, Mary?" Gajeel asked.
"…..Yes….."
"NEXT QUESTION!" Alice roared. (Ha, Alice roared. J)
"Why are they called ' stands' when they are made for sitting?"
"Because they stand on wooden platforms!" Alice and Levy shouted at the same time. They turned instantly to glare at each other. Levy didn't back down.
Alice smirked and nodded, "Good, I didn't think you had a spine!"
"Par-pardon?"
"Ok, why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'?" Mary said with a smirk, waiting for the answer.
Alice sat up straight and said with a sophisticated air, "Because it got dark and won't get any darker but will get lighter."
"Good answer." Gray said.
"Thanks!" Alice said smiling at him with a small blush on her cheeks.
"This will mess with your mind: Doesn't 'expecting the unexpected' make the unexpected expected?" Mary waved her hands for effect.
Alice and Levy thought for a couple moments and Levy fell to the floor from over exerting her brain. Alice laughed at that and then answered, "You don't know what the 'unexpected' is so you won't expect it until you've got it and then you know you should of expected the unexpected. I think I hurt my head there…"
"Oh, did thinking really hurt that much?" Mary said in a baby voice.
"Oi! Just give me the next question baka!"
Mary glared, (=_=) "Why are a 'wise man' and a 'wise guy' opposites?"
"Psh! This is way too easy! Because a man is some old dude and a guy is used for people who are cute. For example, Marakov is a man and Gray is a guy. Look a hot guy! Sounds better then look a hot man!" Alice explained to her sister.
"So does that mean I'm cute?" Gray asked her, smirking.
"Does it, Alice~?" Mary purred at her sister's embarrassment.
"….Not answering that…."
"You'll tell me later." Statement not a question.
"Just ask another question."
"Ok, ok! Why do 'overlook' and 'oversee' mean opposite things?"
Alice stuttered over her answer as Gray put his arm around her shoulders, "Th-they don't...I- I over looked that. I over saw that. Be-because looking is looking for something and seeing is seeing some-something so you're not looking any-anymore."
"Alice, I know that you can't get this wrong…. Why is 'phonics' not spelled the way it sounds?"
Alice stared at Mary, "Sorry. I can't even pronounce phonics."
"Alice…"
"Mary…"
"You just said phonics…"
"Oh, yeah! So I did!" Alice grinned.
"Mary, just give her the next question." Gajeel spoke softly into Mary's ear. Mary shivered.
"If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?"
"Work ain't terrific, love." Gajeel say huskily.
"Oi, break it up you two! I'M supposed to be answering these questions. And Levy, but she's still passed out…" Alice glanced at the unconscious blue haired girl, "Eh, she'll be fine."
"If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?"
"Under our butts." Alice said simply pulling Gray's beer out of his hand and taking a pull from it.
"Gross…ok the next question is…." She trailed off, reading the paper.
"What is it?" Alice questioned, motioning for Mira to bring her another beer.
Mary smiled evilly, "Ok, boys you can't answer this: If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?"
Alice's smile was quick and wicked, "Cause it makes you feel sexy!"
The two guys faces turned red and Mary even thought she saw a little bit of drooling too.
Alice shook her head in amusement and downed the mug, "What's next?"
"If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?"
Alice's face dawned a confused expression, "If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia? That's a kind of stupid question... OF COURSE NOT!"
It was obvious by the ten mugs that magically were before her, Alice was getting smashed. Oh, Mary was going to enjoy this.
"Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?"
"Because men see boobs as one thing for in the bra, and in panties you have your butt and vagina. Grr. I hate that word for some reason. It's annoying…but aren't I right Gray?"
Gray put another mug in her hands and Alice ignored him for the moment.
Mary laughed at her sister, "You're such a drunk~!"
"Am not!" Alice protested.
"Are too!"
"Am not!"
"NEXT QUESTION!" the whole guild shouted, knowing if those two got started it would never end.
"All right~ why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?"
"Because we live with the thoughts that violence is the way to sort things out. Duh." She said tipsily.
"True…" Gajeel admitted.
"Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?"
"I had no idea it was called a garment bag. Because obviously suits will wrinkle in a suitcase." She explained reaching for her 37th beer, "How many of these damn things are there?" she slurred.
"There's only a couple more: why is "abbreviated" such a long word?" Mary asked.
The guild groaned at this, they were enjoying the answers and now Alice was drunk!
"It's only got 11 letters. And I don't know what it means so it's obviously a fancy word which fancy people use and they like to confuse us better people."
"Alice, abbreviated means to shorten a word."
"Wha? I don't get it…"
Mary sighed and read aloud the next question, "Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?"
"They get wet. Dry, and then harden. And get smelly. You sniff a dry towel after someone used it." She said with as much seriousness as a drunk can have.
"Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?"
"Because they people that made the glue bottles put a special inside in the bottles. And glue doesn't dry inside a bottle, it does outside in the air. It's some smart reason why. Something to do with air and stuff in the air..." Alice closed her eyes, "Nope, can't remember the reason why. Mira~ I need another beer, I'm only on my 49th~"
"No, Alice, you need to stop." Gray admonished and took the mug from her.
"No!" she hissed, then a sly smile came across her lips.
He didn't even see it coming.
She pressed her lips against his and his grip loosened on the mug and Alice snatched it, "I win~"
Lluvia, who had just gotten up, fainted once again. Levy sat up as well, but didn't faint, "Interesting." She stated, "Wouldn't have seen it coming."
"Oi, I'm too drunk to try to understand that…" Alice mumbled, ''Don't talk about me when I don't know what you're talking about.''
"Okay, Levy, maybe you can answer the last couple questions," Mary looked back down at the papers, "Why do they call it a 'TV set' when there is only have one?"
"Well, a TV set is including all the—" Levy was cut off by a slurred Alice.
"Because a TV set is a TV and lots of wires that belong to the TV and other stuff."
"Even when drunk Alice still can beat you~" Mary teased the blue haired mage.
"Hmph!" Levy crossed her arms and threw her nose in the air.
"Chill Levy~ chill. Okay on to the next one! Christmas: At what other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?"
"Wait... How is this a question? Is it sarcasm?" Alice frowned. This was getting confusing.
"I don't know, you can't tell if it's sarcasm on paper!" Mary retorted.
"But you're Mary, you're the essence of sarcasm!"
"….That I am." She glanced down at the papers, "Hey look, it's the last question!"
Alice raised her 78th glass, "Lay it on me~!"
"Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway? Wait this is an American question…"
Alice drank the last of her beer and spoke, " A parkway? You damn Americans... It's a motorway... And we don't park on a drive way. We drive over it to park in the garage."
"And that's all of them~! Imma go see if I can find another treasure map~!" Mary said happily, "Happy, Gajeel, you guys want to come with me?"
"AYE~!" Happy said.
"Hn." Gajeel grunted, but following the part Spanish brunette anyway. He told himself it was to keep her out of trouble.
Of course we all know better….
"Alice, you have to tell me the first treasure map story…" Gray stopped talking as he saw Alice asleep among her 100 empty mugs. He leaned over and kissed her forehead, "Later, you're telling me."
Mary: I(pant) did (pantpant) it! TOOK ME FOREVER! DX DX longest thing i've EVER written for FF, like that's no joke. You had better like this ALICE! (i put is a kissing scene like you wanted~!) =_= imma go die now...
Alice: I LOVE YOU MARY! I REALLY DO! I CRIED TEARS OF LAUGHTER WHILST READING THIS. Okay you can only cry tears… but that's not the point. I love this. 2295 words! Probably the longest drabble of these all.
Note to readers: These questions were really found by Mary and were really all answered by me. So this drabble is based on a true email we sent each other. So yeah, you get a bit of vision of what me and Mary do all day.
Absolutely nothing. Just pure epic randomness with my bestfriend and sister from another motherrrr 3
I know... I know.. I was doing a LucyLevyReedus drabble . but this one is written by Marina Rose and I HAD to put it up. And she forced me.
So yeahh.. I know it'll be coming, but the Treasure Map story will probs be next. Some cute GrayAlice. And a GajeelMary chapter sooon! :D
I love Glee. (their songs.)
OH AND BEFORE I LEAVE.
Marina Rose. Is the only way that has reviewed yet? Is no one reading these? Or do they just suck so bad? I'd love some feedback youknow ?