Another Captain America Fanfiction Challenge Forum Prompt. This one is a dialogue prompt: "You know that you don't have to go through this on your own, right? I'll be there if you need me."
Guys… I hurt my own feels with this one… Fair warning.
It was May of 1945, mere weeks after Captain America had crashed the Valkerie into the ice. The war was over, and celebrations erupted on every street corner in New York city. Peggy Carter sat in her apartment, gazing out the window, her face finally revealing the oceans of emotion that battled inside her after a day spent smiling grimly for the cameras. She knew she should be happy, but she couldn't summon the feeling. Her mood was never more evident than when she posed for yet another picture with Howard Stark and he had tried to kiss her. She hauled off and punched him, and he fell over backwards into the fountain behind them. That's when she knew she needed to just call it a night.
She touched her lips remembering Steve's kiss, the very last time she ever saw him. There had been very few men that she kissed in her life. Steve should have been the last one. She put her head in her hands. Steve should have been here to see them win the war. He deserved it more than anyone. A firework went off and Peggy startled, then stalked away from the window angrily.
She sat heavily in her arm chair and switched on the radio so that it was blaring. She didn't care what played, so long as the sound of celebration from outside was successfully blocked out. She thought briefly about tidying up her flat, but for what? No one would be stopping by. Anyone she had befriended in the Army was sent home all over the country. They were probably still fishing Howard out of the fountain. And Steve was dead. Peggy felt numb. Leaning back in her chair she let her mind wander to the past...
Steve Rogers looked up from under his tent in time to see Agent Peggy Carter burst from under the Officer's tent, her expression positively livid, her face ashen. It was pouring down rain, her boots squelched in the thick mud as she walked and she was quickly becoming soaked through but she didn't seem to notice. She glanced at him as she stalked past him and he caught her eye, but quickly looked down. He knew that look, it was the look of someone who believed themselves to be completely and utterly alone.
Peggy threw back the flap of her green army tent and ducked inside. She sat herself on her cot and put her face in her hands. She knew she only had a few moments to herself to deal with what she had just been told. The men could never see her cry. She was at enough of a disadvantage as it was. She clenched the edge of her cot so hard that her knuckles turned white, and tears spilled down her cheeks rapidly as she held back sobs that threatened to overtake her. She stood and pulled her fingers through her hair, her eyes clenched shut.
"'Agent Carter?"
Peggy's eyes flew open and she whipped around to face the back of the tent, away from the sudden intruder. She cursed under her breath. He had seen her. Steve stood frozen in the doorway, his courage failing him in the presence of female tears. The rain began to pool around his feet.
"Oh for heaven's sake Steve come in! You're letting the rain inside!" Steve stepped in, wishing that a hole would open in the ground and swallow him up. Peggy roughly wiped her eyes and looked at him, her expression so fierce that Steve was certain he could feel it burning into his soul.
"What do you need Captain?"
Steve opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out for what felt like a full minute. Peggy stared at him.
"I- I just- Well I noticed you seemed upset and I just wanted to see-"
"Yes thank you Captain but I assure you I am perfectly capable of handling my emotions on my own. If that will be all?" She gestured towards the door. Steve frowned, irked by her sharpness and her tone.
"Peggy I don't care that you're crying, I just came over here to see if you're alright. You have nothing to be ashamed of."
Peggy bit back a sharp retort, losing her temper was worse than tears. If she started screaming at him now he would never respect her. She struggled for something to say to make him leave that wasn't rude or emotional, but she couldn't. She just stared at him, clearly at war with herself.
Steve's expression softened, "Do you want to talk about it?"
Peggy's eyes burned with tears that she was fighting so hard to control. She sat down again on her cot and turned her face away from him. "My mother died. Two weeks ago. I didn't even know she was ill. And those bastard only just got me the information. She's been dead for two weeks."
Tears streamed down her face, but she kept it turned resolutely away. She felt Steve sit on the cot next to her. He didn't say anything for a while, just let her compose herself.
"I lost my mom right before the war. I know how painful this must be for you." Peggy didn't say anything, just nodded and wiped her face on her sleeve. Steve hesitated, then put his hand on her shoulder.
"You know that you don't have to go through this on your own, right? I'll be there if you need me."
Finally, Peggy looked at him, and Steve's heart constricted to see her face stained with tears. She gave him the saddest smile he had ever seen, "Thank you Steve. That really does mean a lot."
Peggy came back to reality as she sat staring at the flames licking the logs in her fireplace. More fireworks went off outside her window, and cheering overpowered her radio. She looked slowly around her empty apartment, and burst into tears.