A/N: I'm going to be gone for a week, so there won't be any updates for that period. So that's why I'm going to post two chapters before I go and two when I get back. After that updates will go back to their usual cheerful daily selves.

Would you cast yourself so solitary?
All alone you prove that I was,
Broken down to move and alright,
Battling the loss you live for,
Meant the world to you.

"Has anyone seen Diego?" Vanya asked the next afternoon.

She was showing Rumor several flashcards that she had constructed for sign language. So far it had failed as a bonding activity. Both of them were rather bored, Rumor managing to shoot hostile glares at Spaceboy at every chance.

Not only was she angry but that morning Rumor gotten a letter in the mail. It was a court summons, next week to be precise. A.k.a, time for her review. Even though Patrick was allowed full custody of Claire that didn't mean that she didn't get a chance to try and win at least part-time custody every few months. In the past they hadn't gone so well and had only served to make Rumor aware of her failure as a mother.

The TV was blaring with Séance watching it avidly. His sunglasses had slipped past his nose and he was making loud snoring noises. To everyone it was obvious that he was asleep. However when Vanya had tried to turn it off he had sat up and barked;

"Hey, I'm watching that! Isn't that right Monsieur Canapé?"

After that he'd promptly fallen back asleep. Spaceboy looked up momentarily from the Moon readings at Vanya's question.

"He left last night for a shift," he said briefly before continuing his work.

"Shouldn't he be back by now then?" pressed Vanya.

.05 rolled his eyes from across the room. He turned around from playing with the puppy he had named Spot and said;

"It might've escaped your notice, but he does disappear for long periods of time every now and then. It's nothing to fret over."

"He hasn't been doing that recently," she replied with slight irritation creeping into her voice, "Even when he does go out. Considering all of the things that have happened in the past year it's entirely probable that there's a bad reason for this."

Rumor took out her notepad and wrote;

"It's no big deal. He does this."

Vanya bit the corner of her lip gently. Irritably Spaceboy said;

"Fine. I'll use his tracer to see where he is if he's not back by tomorrow. Personally I don't see the point. It really was only a matter of time before he ran off. It's not like there's anything keeping him here."

Vanya flipped up the next flashcard little more forcefully.

"And that's supposed to mean?"

Too late Spaceboy realized his mistake.

"I didn't mean…" he started slowly.

But his brain had caught up with his tongue and in truth he had no idea what he meant. Vanya shoved her chair backwards and left the room. Spaceboy winced when he heard her door slam.

.

.

.

At 4:30 the next morning Vanya sat in front of the TV. Dark circles had already started to form under her eyes. Her coffee mug had been filled and refilled several times. Even with the TV on her eyelids kept drooping. She'd drawn her knees up to her chin and wasn't even looking at the TV. It was probably only on for background noise anyhow.

Her 'mother' noted all of this when she walked up. After all, she'd been built to notice if anything was wrong with her 'children'. They had needed her less and less as they'd grown up which saddened her. So it made her feel, as she could feel, nice when they needed her.

There was probably something wrong with the fact that she had almost liked it when Vanya was bedridden. All the rest of her siblings had left her alone, except for Kraken's nighttime visits, so she had been left to care for her. Mom occupied her time with telling Vanya about her 'family', even if she had sugar coated it a bit. Make that a lot. But now Vanya needed someone to talk to and she was readily available.

"Vanya," she said gently, "You're being a little silly."

"Probably," Vanya sighed in response, "Right now I do kind of feel like a moron."

Mom took a seat down next to her and shut off the TV with the remote.

"Now Vanya," she said, "I know that it can be difficult to wait up for someone. But have you ever done this before?"

"I don't think that I need 'motherly' advice right now," Vanya snapped, "I'm getting a hell of a lot of criticism from everyone else already, thank you very much."

As always Mom ignored the mean things and continued on as if nothing had been said.

"Talking to me might help keep you awake."

Fingers drumming listlessly on her knees Vanya replied;

"In the beginning I did. Then he told me to quit it and get to sleep before I ended up looking like Séance."

"He always did have a way with words," ventured Mom.

A small chuckle came from her throat. Smiling Mom continued to say;

"Now don't you think that staying awake all this time when everything is fine is unnecessary?"

"Probably," Vanya agreed, running her hand through her hair, "But it's just…"

Vanya's voice trailed off. Mom waited for another few seconds.

"Yes?" she prompted.

"I feel so stupid for doing this," she muttered, "But right now I do not want to screw up what I've got going now. I know that I've already really fucked things up with my family before but I want to do things right this time. I'm so scared of hurting someone these days. Not to mention…"

"What honey?" asked Mom.

"Nothing."

"You can tell me," Mom said reassuringly, "I won't tell anyone if that's what you want."

She gave her mother a look. Vanya's fingers started to drum on her knee again.

"Fine," Vanya said at length, "Just…I haven't told anyone about this. Not even Diego."

A surprised look crossed Mom's face. Laughing at her mother's shocked look she said as she shook her head;

"No, I haven't told him this. I can't tell anyone this, especially not him. I told you I didn't want to fuck things up. They probably wouldn't react well to this. It's just…sometimes when someone puts on Bach or Mozart or something then I get this feeling, you know? It's like the insanity is creeping in. And there's nothing I can do about it except leave the room or cover my ears. Then when I look in the mirror I see these red-veined eyes sometimes and I know…I know it's still here."

Angrily Vanya pounded her chest with her fist.

"I've still got that power and that craziness. They're just locked away right now and if I tell anyone," Vanya sighed again and looked down, "Then I'm afraid I'll get locked up somewhere. And with Diego…it's just…I really…"

Once again Vanya's voice simply faded away.

"You don't want to lose him, do you?" Mom asked.

Sighing once more Vanya bowed her head.

"I can't lose him," said Vanya simply, "After everything that's happened I can't. All the things that I've wanted are finally coming true and I just can't have them snatched away from me right now. I can't let it happen. I won't. Even if I have to die to do that I won't allow it."

Neither of them said anything for awhile. Mom wasn't programmed to deal with emotions on that level.

"Well, I think that everything's better now," Mom said, trying to change the subject, "Now that he's back you can relax and go to bed."

"No he isn't," Vanya said, puzzled.

Mom furrowed her brow.

"But you were upset with yourself. I thought you meant that he'd come back."

"No he hasn't. I just felt stupid for being insecure," said Vanya tersely.

Once again Mom furrowed her brow. The Umbrella Academy communicators that they all wore served another purpose besides a telephone. Essentially if the user was wearing it and hadn't called in five hours it initiated a call. Mom looked at the clock on the wall. She used the new data to figure out when Kraken had last called. Quickly she did her calculations. The last recorded call from him had been roughly thirty five hours, thirty seven minutes, and thirty two seconds ago. She hadn't picked up any more signals since then.

There was always the possibility that he had taken it off. But her mechanical memory which went back twenty years never showed him doing this. That excluded the time that he had run away. But she made sure to factor in his actions with it since the Umbrella Academy had reformed. In her head she calculated the odds of someone killing/injuring/capturing/maiming/knocking out Diego and taking the communicator/destroying/using it in a diabolical scheme. Then she turned back to Vanya and gave an uneasy smile.

"Well, if that's the case then maybe we should be worried just a teensy bit."